Fifty shades of exploration
by Madison0705
Summary: What if Christian was never introduced to BDSM by Elena but decides to explore the lifestyle later in life? What if Ana was also exploring BDSM? How will they meet? Will they be compatible? How will their real lives interfere with the lifestyle?
1. Chapter 1

_All Characters belong to E.L. James and the Fifty Shades of Grey Trilogy_

**Chpt. 1: Christian's POV**

"Andrea!" I call from my office.

"Yes Mr. Grey?" Andrea asks quickly walking into my office.

"Get Ros up here immediately!" I bark.

"Yes sir" she responds.

"Yes Christian?" Ros asks entering my office. She is the only employee who I let get away with calling me by my first name. She has been with me since the very beginning and is currently my second in command. She knows the business very well and is able to run things in my absence, not that I've ever taken a vacation or been away from the office for any length of time.

"What the fuck is going on with the Taiwan deal? Why hasn't it closed by now?" I say angrily. This deal has been dragging on for six months now; we should have signed months ago!

"They aren't budging on the price" she explains. "Their financials do not support the price they are requesting however I think they are stalling because they don't want to deal with women."

"God Damn it!" I yell angrily, throwing my phone across the room. Ros, used to my temper by now, does not so much as flinch at my outburst.

"How do you want to proceed?" she asks.

"I will fly there later this week for a few days and find a way to get them to sell. We need the shipping yard in order to get our food delivered safely. Have Andrea reschedule everything from Wednesday through Friday of this week into your schedule" I order.

"No problem Christian" Ros says leaving my office.

I swear sometimes the only way to get something done is to do it yourself!

"Andrea!" I bark.

"Yes Mr. Grey?" Andrea walks into my office.

"Book me a first class ticket to Taiwan for Wednesday and schedule a meeting with the shipping yard owners for Friday morning. I will need hotel reservations for Thursday through at least Saturday; see if you can get a penthouse or at least a suite. Book a return flight for Saturday but be available in case I need to change the flight at the last minute on Friday. Ros will cover everything in my absence" I direct.

"Yes Mr. Grey" Andrea leaves my office.

"Andrea, I also need a new phone" I say just before she walks out of my office.

"Yes Mr. Grey" she says without giving it a second thought.

I am beyond frustrated with this deal but we have been working on it too long and it is too important for me to walk away. We have increased our charity work with food deliveries to many third world countries and this shipping yard is key to being able to have full control of our deliveries and not needing to hire so many contractors.

"Gentleman, are we ready?" I ask walking into the board room. "I have asked that you prepare a brief presentation on your recommendations for the restructuring of the management team if we were to acquire Seattle Publishing. You may begin."

Within minutes I quickly realize no one has provided information that demonstrates they conducted in depth reviews of all team members. They are basing their recommendations on the resumes of each manager and not on performance reviews or financial implication. Once again I am reminded that sometimes it's easier to do everything yourself.

"Gentleman!" I interrupt. "Was I not clear on exactly what I was looking for?"

"Yes Mr. Grey" Mr. Jones answers. "You asked for recommendations on the management team for Seattle Publishing which we did-"

"No!" I interrupt. "You made recommendations after only looking at resumes. It is obvious none of you reviewed their full HR charts including performance reviews, background checks and compensation packages. How do I know this? Because this employee right here" I say throwing a file on the desk "Has an arrest record four pages long and your recommendation is to keep him!"

"Sorry Mr. Grey, we will compile a new presentation –" Mr. Jones begins.

"Get out of here and do the job I pay you for! All of you! And if it's not complete this time don't even bother coming back for the presentation!" I yell walking out of the board room and slamming the door shut.

"Mr. Grey?" Andrea asks as I am about to enter my office.

"What?" I snap.

"Your new phone is on your desk and IT has programmed it so you can access your email and contacts" Andrea explained.

"Thank you" I said walking into my office.

The IT department is used to having to program new phones for me as it seems there are months where I go through several phones often because of tough days. I've had anger problems for as long as I can remember; I was kicked out of four high schools before graduation. I dropped out of Harvard but I'm convinced I would have been kicked out for fighting at some point. This the primary reason I have my own company; I knew early on I could never work for someone else as my temper would likely get in the way. I have been seeing a therapist for years but I don't find it helpful at all; I'm not sure why I continue to pay him an obscene amount of money. For awhile working out or kickboxing would help but even now I have found that it doesn't help like it used to.

"Andrea!" I call through the intercom. "Please have Taylor come up."

"Yes Mr. Grey" Andrea answers.

Andrea has been my assistant for the last couple of years but before her I went through a slew of assistants. Most could not handle my temper or my immediate demands; others thought I was paying them to swoon over me. I could catch them sitting staring at me or flirty with me and then they would start wearing inappropriate clothing to work that showed way too much cleavage. Did they really think that dressing like a tramp would make me want them? Sure they were good looking but I have a firm non fraternizing policy for myself. I really don't date woman anyway so their advances were moot. It's not that I'm not attracted to woman; god knows I can appreciate a beautiful woman! I've been out on several dates but they always seem to end the same way. When my business responsibilities require my attention they get mad that I need to cancel dates or work late hours. If I devote all of my attention to them like they would want I would lose my business. I typically work at least twelve hours a day at the office and then usually another couple of hours in my home office. Weekends are no exception; if I'm not at the office I'm in my home office for at least several hours each day. Most woman cannot understand this and they often end the relationship. Once it lasted a few months and I caught her cheating; when confronted she blamed me because I worked too many hours. Since then I haven't been actively trying to date and I have turned down requests to set me up on a blind date by my family members.

"Mr. Grey?" Taylor enters my office.

"I'm flying to Taiwan on Wednesday and should be back on Saturday. I don't see the need for you to accompany me on the trip, therefore I am giving you the weekend off" I explain.

"With all due respect Mr. Grey, I would rather accompany you on the trip for security purposes" Taylor says.

"I am sure you would, but I would rather you not" I firmly say.

"As you wish sir" Taylor exits my office

Taylor has been my head of security for about four years now, ever since I received a threat on my life at work. My head of GEH security, Welsh, had recommended I obtain personal security and personally recommended Taylor. Taylor is a former marine with combat training who has worked in personal security for at least the last ten years. I know he means well, but I need to do this trip alone. There have not been any threats recently and I know if something arose Taylor could have someone in Taiwan support me until he could personally arrive.

Wednesday morning arrives quickly and I find myself seated in first class for the flight to Taiwan as I prepare for what will likely be a long boring flight. As many times as I have flown to Taiwan to get the deal this close I never get used to the long flight. I am scheduled to arrive Thursday evening which should give me enough time to rest before my meeting Friday morning. I will then fly out Saturday or Sunday depending on how things progress on Friday.

As I thought the flight to Taiwan was long and boring. Without internet access on my phone I couldn't get very much done but type up a few reports to send out when I get to the hotel. I try to sleep on the plane but I'm afraid of falling into a deep sleep and having a nightmare. I have nightmares at least several times per week surrounding the abuse I experienced at the hands of my mother's pimp when I was a toddler. He would beat me and put lit cigarettes out on my bare skin often while my mother sat by too high from drugs to realize what he was doing. Eventually she overdosed and I was stuck in the apartment hungry for several days before her pimp returned and found her. He called the police who took me to a hospital and eventually I was adopted. My therapist says my anger stems from the abuse from the pimp as well as at my mother for not protecting me. I have tried telling him that was years ago and shouldn't be effecting me now but he insists that's the reason.

**** I am taking some liberties here since this is fiction; I have no idea about the culture of Taiwan ****

I check into the hotel and spend the next few hours responding to the emails I received while flying and sending off the reports that I typed. As I flip through the tourist magazines on the desk I see an ad for a sex club advertising domination and submission offering a special introductory night tomorrow night for new members. I laugh to myself, as if I would ever visit a sex club. I can just see the headlines now: Billionaire Christian Grey visits sex club to get off.

I fall asleep rather quickly having slept minimally on the long flight over here and before I know it the phone is ringing with the wake up call. I quickly shower, eat breakfast and head to the meeting at the shipping yard. A couple hours later the meeting is resolved and the owners have agreed to sell for the two point five million we proposed. I believe they were just giving Ros a problem because she is female as she originally speculated because I was able to easily argue all of their points. The paperwork is signed, we share a couple drinks and I return to the hotel. As much as I try, I cannot stop thinking of the advertisement. Back in the states I know clubs like this exist but they don't advertise out in the open and admission is usually by invitation only. I have never known anyone involved in domination and submission and realize I know very little of lifestyle.

I spend the next couple of hours searching the internet for all the information I can find on BDSM as it is often referred to. The information on line highlights the roles of the two individuals involved in a scene; one acts as a dominate who takes control of everything while the other is the submissive who gives the dominate complete control over everything including her own pleasure. I find myself very intrigued by this; the thought of having complete control over the entire scene has me very excited. I realized early in my career that I need to have complete control over everything especially surrounding my company. It's the reason I refuse to delegate certain tasks and insist on working so many hours. I can't help but wonder what it would be like to have complete control in the bedroom as well? I have had a few sexual experiences but most women would become upset when I asked them not to touch my chest or my back. I have several scars there from the abuse and I cannot stand to be touched in those areas. Typically I end up holding the woman's hands above their head while we are intimate but it rarely lasts and the woman becomes upset convinced it is her. Perhaps having control in the bedroom would resolve this issue, I think. I could tie their hands together or to a bed; then they wouldn't be able to touch me at all and they wouldn't think it was them since it was part of the scene.

The more I think about it and read online about it, the more I'm convinced that I need to try this. I look the club up online and it seems fairly reputable at least from their website. They typically require new perspective members to be accompanied by an existing member for several nights before they will be granted full admission. Twice a year they offer introductory nights in which they open their doors to the public for an admission price equal to $2,500 US dollars. The website explains this price is for admission only into the club and does not guarantee any sexual acts will occur. I decide it is worth checking out; how much harm can come for attending the club in a completely foreign country in which no one seems to know who I am? I find myself getting turned on the thought of what I might see.

I dress for casually for the evening in pair of jeans and a tight fitting t shirt before grabbing a cab to head to the club. I provide the driver with the address and he takes me to what looks like an old warehouse. I verify with him the address is correct and he advises me to enter through the door on the side which has a small red light above it. I cautiously walk over to the door and ring the doorbell; a large muscular man greets me at the door and tells me to step just inside. I step into a small barely lit hallway where he searches me for any weapons. I'm initially taken back by this but realize it's for everyone's safety including my own.

"You are not a member?" he asks.

"No, I am here for the introductory night" I answer.

"Come into the office and wait here" he says opening a door just off the hallway.

As I'm waiting I'm suddenly wondering if I made a mistake coming here. I realize how vulnerable I could be in a place like this and I know Taylor would have my ass if he knew I was here.

"Hello" a middle aged stunning woman dressed in a black says walking into the room. "I am Madam Serene, and you are?"

"Ummmm" I stumble; I hadn't thought about this.

"Relax darling" she says sitting down next to me. "Real name now, then you can come up with an alias for inside the club."

"Christian" I answer.

"Okay, Christian" she hands me a piece of paper. "These are the rules of the club; everything that occurs in here is strictly confidential so you will need to sign an NDA. Are you familiar with this type of document?"

"Yes" I answer signing it.

"I assume you are interested in domination, correct?" she asks.

"Yes, how can you tell?" I ask.

"My job is to read people darling" she smiles. "Here are rules for domination in my club. One absolutely key point is the safe words. Before any act can occur the dominate and submissive must agree on two safe words. One is meant to convey to the dominate the submissive's need to slow down and the other is to convey that the submissive as reached his or her limit. If either word is said the dominate absolutely must obey. We do not take this lightly; any violation of this rule will have you banned not only from this club but from every BDSM club including those in the US. Understood?"

"Yes ma'am" I answer.

"Good" she smiles again. "Now before you enter the club, I need to explain the bracelets. Black means dominate looking for submissive. Red means submissive looking for dominate. Grey means new dominate looking for submissive. Pink means new submissive looking for dominate. Yellow means someone looking to watch. Only two people are allowed in a room at a time; anyone watching does so from a booth which contains access to a one way mirror. No one should enter the booth connected to the room without your permission, however I always advice the dominates to check to see that the blinds are drawn and switch is pushed to close by the mirror. Any questions?"

"I don't think so" I answer quietly.

"Is this your first time?" she asks.

"Yes," I answer. "Is it that obvious?"

"You seem a little nervous dear" she laughs. "I suggest you go to the bar first and get a drink or two to loosen yourself up. Once you find someone you might want to be in a scene with, you take them into your assigned room and before anything progresses you discuss limits. Take a moment to think of your hard and soft limits if you don't already have them drawn up. He/she will tell you their limits at which point you both can decide if you are compatible to go further. Also, since this is your first time I will remind you that not every scene needs to result in sexual intercourse. Some scenes are about exerting control over the submissive and the submissive giving up complete control."

"Thank you" I say attaching the grey bracelet she handed me.

"Good luck and enjoy your evening" she walks me out and I take a deep breath before she opens the next door.


	2. Chapter 2

_All characters belong to E.L. James & the Fifty Shades of Grey Trilogy._

**Chpt. 2: Christian's POV**

Taking a deep breath, I walk through the door and take in the scene in front of me. I have to admit it is not what I expected at all. Hearing this was a sex club I assumed it meant people would literally be having sex or making out everywhere. Personally that is not my thing because I wouldn't want anyone watching the girl I was with in the throes of passion or seeing her vulnerable and exposed to everyone. Surprisingly, if I didn't know any better I would assume I just walked into an ordinary club. There is a long bar against the far wall and small tables throughout the room. There is a dance floor however the music is playing softly in the background. The only thing that is suggestive of a sex club is some of the outfits; some men and women are dressed in very skimpy clothing. Some have collars around their necks with leashes attached while others just have small chocker style necklaces around their neck. Others, like myself, are dressed in comfortable every day attire or your typical club attire. I take Madam Serene's suggestion and go to the bar ordering a glass of bourbon; I down the first glass quickly and request a second. As I relax, I really take notice of everyone around me. Bracelets are easily seen from afar despite the dim lighting of the club. There are some beautiful women here of various ethnic backgrounds but I sit back and wait for someone to catch my interest. I don't know that I'm going to find anyone here tonight but just learning about the lifestyle today has me wanting to explore it further when I get back to Seattle.

Just as I finish my second glass of bourbon a beautiful woman walks through the door. She is dressed in a sexy but tasteful black dress that hugs her body in all the right places. The dress falls just to her upper thigh and would be almost indecent if she tried to bend over however standing upright the dress is stunning on her. Her legs seem to go on and on, extenuated by the red high heeled shoes she is wearing. Her long brown hair is pulled back from her face and falls in curls to her lower back. She seems to be new here as well as she is looking around uncertainly. She slowly walks towards the bar and I can feel my heartbeat increase as she sits a few seats down from me. She orders a martini but downs it quickly while taking in the scene before her. I notice her bracelet is pink which doesn't surprise me as she clearly looks like she is new to the scene and she does not seem confident enough to be a dominate. I ask the bartender to refill her drink on me after which she sends me a small smile thanking me. I decide to take the opportunity and approach this beautiful woman to see if she might be interested in exploring this new area together.

"Hello, may I sit?" I ask approaching her.

"Please" she answers indicating the empty seat next to her.

"First time here?" I ask.

"Yes" she answers. "You?"

"Yes" I signal the bartender and ask for a beer.

"My name is Rose" she says extending her hand.

"Taylor" I shake her hand. "Are you from the states?"

"Yes, as are you?" she asks.

"Yes" I answer providing as little information as possible.

I wasn't expecting to run into someone from the states here and I suddenly worry that she might recognize me. I am often featured on many business magazines and celebrity magazines as the media is often fascinated with the fact that I'm one of the world's richest eligible bachelors. Just as I began to panic she might run to the press after tonight I find myself reassured remembering the NDA I signed before walking into the club. Rose would have signed the same NDA before she came in which protects us both.

"So…." She smiles at me.

"So…." I answer and she giggles at me. "I'm sorry, I guess it's pretty obvious we are both pretty new to the scene. Would you like another drink or…."

"I don't need another drink" she says seductively.

I take her hand as she stands up and immediately feel a spark; as I look at her it's clear she felt the same spark. I lead her to the back hallway where a staff member escorts us to an available room; as we enter the room I can feel her immediately tense in nervousness. We haven't yet discussed it but I'm guessing by her reaction this is likely her first time being involved in a scene. I smile to myself realizing we are both in here for the first time.

"Look at me" I command as her eyes have been glued to the floor since I closed the door.

She looks at me and I see nervousness and fear in her eyes just as I thought.

"I won't do anything you don't want me to, I promise" I reassure her. "Is this your first time in a scene?"

"Yes sir" she answers quietly.

"Do you have safe words?" I inquire.

"Yes sir" she answers promptly. "Yellow and red."

"Very good" I say. "Do you have a list of your limits?"

"Yes sir" she answers handing me a piece of paper from her purse.

I quickly read through her hard and soft limits; the list is not short for either category however we have very similar hard limits. Neither of us want to be involved in needle play, fire play, acts involving bodily waste or acts involving children. Additionally, canning and fisting are hard limits for her which I am agreeable to as I can't see doing either with this beautiful woman standing in front of me.

"We have very similar hard limits" I hand her my list which was in my shirt pocket.

She quickly reads through the limits and returns the list to me without commenting. I wonder for a moment what she is thinking before realizing that she hasn't spoken because I haven't asked her a direct question. For someone who is so new to the scene she has embraced the rules of submission very well at least initially.

"Are you agreeable to my limits Rose?" I ask.

"Yes sir" she answers.

"Good. I am going to step out of the room for a few moments, when I return I want to find you kneeling on the floor wearing your heels, underwear and bra only. Your clothes should be neatly folded on the desk here and your hair should remain tied back. Understood?" I direct.

"Yes sir" she says breathing deeply.

I step out of the room and take a deep breath; I can do this – this is the control I have been needing. I go to the bar and order a glass of whiskey. I finish the drink quickly and stroll back to the room where I hope Rose has followed the directions I gave her. I open the door to find that she is exactly as I instructed her to be. I am surprised at just how beautiful this woman truly is; her black lace bra is pushing her breasts upward and her nipples are dangerously close to peeking out. She is wearing a matching black lace thong underwear that does little to cover anything. I peek over at the desk and see her clothes folding perfectly as I directed.

"You may stand" I order.

She complies immediately; her eyes remaining glued to the floor at all times. I walk slowly around her taking her body in all its beauty.

"Do you remember your safe words?" I ask as I find myself breathless already.

"Yes sir" she answers and I can hear the excitement in her voice.

I walk over to the cabinets and find a pair of soft handcuffs; I cannot take the chance of having her touch my chest and my back in the middle of a scene. I have no idea how I would respond to her if that happened. I return to Rose who has not moved from the spot I left her in and much to my surprise I find her still staring at the floor. I take each of her wrists gently behind her back, handcuffing them to each other. I hear a slight gasp from her at this move however I chose to ignore it remembering we are both new to the scene so I can't expect her to follow the role of the submissive perfectly and not speak unless requested. After making sure the handcuffs are secure, I gently place kisses along the sides of her neck trying to reassure her. I again return to the drawers taking a few moments to take in all the various toys and accessories they offer. All items are sealed in new plastic bags as items are never used by another couple following a session.

I return to Rose and gently unclasp her bra from between her beautiful breasts. I realize at this moment my mistake; her bra cannot come off with her hands in handcuffs. I quickly step behind her, undue a cuff allow the bra to quickly fall to the floor before I reattach the cuff. I step back in front of her and begin gently sucking on her nipple while fondling her breasts. I hear her breathing increase quickly indicating she is enjoying this act. Her nipple quickly hardens in my mouth as I continue alternating between sucking and biting her nipple. I quickly release her nipple and attach a small nipple clamp to it which causes her to gasp as her eyes widen slightly although remain focused on floor. Leaving the nipple clamp in place, I slowly begin sucking on the other nipple. This one takes a little longer to harden as I'm sure she is battling between the pleasure from my mouth and the slight pain from the bite of the clamp on her other nipple. Within a couple minutes her nipple hardens in my mouth and I pull sucking just in time to attach the other clamp. A small chain is attached to both clamps which are now firmly affixed to her chest proudly.

I pull her chin up so she is looking at me and I surprise her by attacking her mouth next. It wasn't my plan but when she looked up at me her lips just looked so inviting I couldn't help myself. She gasps as my lips press firmly against hers and I take this opportunity thrusting my tongue in her mouth. I continue to kiss her passionately for several minutes and I begin to feel her body relax. I pull a blind fold out of my pocket at that moment and put it over her eyes.

"Just enjoy" I whisper into her ear.

I take off my pants and shirt, remaining only in my boxers. My erection was pushing hard against my jeans and needed some relief so I could continue. I didn't plan the scene completely before entering the room so I am kind of planning it as I go. I want to make this session about pleasure for both of us and not have pain or punishments involved but if Rose breaks a rule I will have to enforce it. I return to Rose who still has not moved from the initial spot she was in. I gently tug on the chain attached to her nipples urging her to follow me. I lead her over to the leather bench that is in the middle of the room before removing her underwear. I am pleased to find that her underwear is already wet with evidence of her excitement and anticipation of what is to come. I gently lean her down so her chest and stomach rest on the cool leather bench. I push her legs apart and just take in her beauty as she is in this position. I go to the table where I had laid a few items from the drawers and decide to use the Ben-Wa balls next.

"Open your mouth" I direct and she immediately complies.

"Suck….these need to be moist" I say putting the balls into her mouth.

I watch her exploring the balls in her mouth likely trying to figure out what they are. We didn't discuss it but I doubt she has very much experience with any of the items in this room. I find myself grimacing at the thought of another man doing any of this to her but me. _Since when do I think like this? This is supposed to be meaningless! I'm never going to see her again!_

"Open" I direct and remove the balls from her mouth which are now covered in her saliva.

Returning to her legs, I gently pull down on her hips so they are at the end of the bench. I gently rub her folds which are drenched in wetness with my fingers and I hear her breathing hitch. It is taking everything in me to not just take her right here right now. I have to remind myself that this if first about her pleasure then I will have my pleasure. I gently insert the balls into her and feel her body immediately clench around the foreign object. I reach over, putting my arm under her stomach and pull her up so she is standing. Her face is flushed with excitement as I expect the balls inside of her just moved and hit a certain spot as she stood up. I again take her by the chain and urge her to follow me; this time we are walking around the room with no particular destination in mind. Her breathing is rapid now as I expect the walking around the room is really jostling the balls around inside of her. According to what I read online the balls should be hitting a certain spot inside of her that should bring her very close to an orgasm. I bring her over to the end of the couch and gently bend her over the arm of it.

"I want you to count Rose" I say before slapping her ass.

"One" she says breathing heavily.

This continues until I reach ten and by now she is struggling with not grinding herself against the couch. Honestly I'm shocked she hasn't come yet, I expected the pleasure spanking would have gotten her off since every time I slapped her ass the balls inside of her should have moved forward. It is clear she enjoyed the spanking as her breathing was heavy and her thighs are coated in her own juices. I reach under her and begin massaging her clit; her breathing hitches and I see her fists close tightly. After a few minutes she still hasn't come, so I apply more pressure and alternate between pressure and pinching her clit.

"Sir! Please sir!" she yells suddenly.

"What is it?" I ask quickly afraid I'm hurting her as I slow down applying only gentle pressure to her clit.

"I need to come sir! Please sir….can I come?" she begs.

_Shit!_ I completely forgot; Madam Serene even told me I would be in charge of the submissive body including her sexual release. _How could I be so stupid to forget this? The girl must be in agony from being on the edge for so long!_

"Come!" I command pinching her clit hard once again as she combusts around me.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" She screams as her orgasm rips through her body.

I give her a moment and decide that I need to make her come again since it was my stupidity that caused her to have to suffer for so long. I get on my knees and begin cleaning up her juices with my mouth which have now run down her legs. I bring her hips closer to my face and pull her legs apart further so I can have better access to her but I find this position is not conducive to what I want to do. I quickly stand back up and I hear her sigh quietly at the loss of contact. I pull her up against me with her back to my front and gently pushing my erection against her ass which is a pretty pink color from the spanking. I bring her to the front of the couch and sit her on the edge of it. I sit between her legs on the floor and move her ass so it is barely on the couch. I immediately return my attention to her clit and begin flicking it with my tongue; her breathing immediately hitches and the blush returns to her cheeks. I alternate between sucking on her folds and nibbling gently on her clit brining her very close to the edge as her hips begin to slowly move against my face. I should punish this movement since I did not tell her to move but I think I punished her enough by not telling her to come earlier. I gently tug at the chain between her breasts as I suck hard on her clit.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" she exclaims at the sudden pulling of her nipples.

"Did you like?" I ask pulling away from clit momentarily.

"Yes sir" she answers shyly.

I continue sucking on her clit while gently pulling on the chain attached to her nipples sending her body right to the edge of ecstasy. Just when it is clear she is about to come I reach inside of her gently pushing the balls around her.

"OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" she yells at the unexpected feeling.

"Come Rose!" I command just as I yank the balls out of her.

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!" She yells as she once again combusts; I gently move my fingers in and out of her as she grips them tightly as her walls spasm.

"OH!" She yells as I release her nipples from the clamp and gently take each one in my mouth massaging the feeling back into them.

The combined rush of blood back to her nipples and the ongoing to attack on her ever sensitive nether regions sends her immediately into another orgasm as I feel her burst around my fingers gripping them tightly. Her body is thrashing under mine as she finds her releases and rides out her last orgasm. Once she has calmed down I remove my fingers from her body and put them against her lips; she immediately understands and sucks my fingers clean.

I stand above her and gently bring her off the couch and place her on her knees in front of me. I remove the handcuffs; in this position I know she cannot reach my chest or my back so I don't find the cuffs a necessity. I step out of my boxers and finally free my erection which up until now has been completely ignored. I step in front of Rose and lift her head up just as my hard erection touches her lips. She immediately opens her mouth and takes me in; I almost cum at just the touch of her tongue on me. I have to distract myself by reviewing proposals in my head so I don't come too quickly; I want to savor this moment. I am immediately brought back to realty when she brings her hand up to grasp the base of my erection as she picks up the speed in which she is sucking me. I take place my hand gently on her hand and urge her to take me deeper. It takes a couple times but eventually she is able to take my entire erection in her mouth which I know is not an easy feat as most woman are not able to fit it in their mouth without gagging. My head bumps against the back of her throat just as she swallows which sends me over the edge and I cum forcefully in her mouth.

"Swallow" I command seeing her struggling with me in her mouth still.

I wonder briefly if she has never had a man come in her mouth because the way she was moving it seemed as if she knew what she was doing. I have never come so quickly from having a woman suck on me for only a few minutes. She continues to suck me dry only more gently as my erection slowly comes down. I stand her up, pull the blindfold off and kiss her passionately on the lips.

"Please sit" I say motioning towards the couch where she sat only moments ago when I made her come.

She sits blushing, probably realizing the same thing.

"The scene is over, but I want to talk to you freely if that's okay?" I ask.

"That's fine" she says.

"I have to ask, and please be honest, did you enjoy that scene" I ask quietly.

"Enjoy?" she asks pausing and my heart sinks. If she tells me she didn't enjoy it I don't know what I will do. "That's probably a huge understatement" she giggles.

"You had me worried for a second" I sigh relieved.

"Sorry" she says again giggling. "Honestly it was amazing. I've never come more than once yet you made me come three times! I have to say I was very nervous about coming in here for the first time, but you were wonderful at reassuring me."

"Why were you nervous?" I ask.

"Well" she pauses. "I've never been in a scene before and I have heard that sometimes a dom just needs to control and simply punishes the sub to relieve his stress. I wasn't sure what to expect."

"This was my first scene as well" I admit. "I didn't want it to be about punishments."

We sit in comfortable silence together ignoring the fact that we are both still naked. I think we are both avoiding leaving the room; I for one don't want to lose Rose. I really enjoyed the scene but for some reason I feel connected to her on a deeper level. I know that once we leave the room it can never work since we are in a foreign country and she likely lives on the opposite coast of where I live.

"I guess we should be going so someone else can use the room" she says standing up.

"Rose" I say, standing up so our bodies are inches apart. "I really enjoyed tonight and am glad I met you."

"I am glad my first scene was with you Taylor" she says kissing me gently on the lips.

"When do you return to the states?" I ask suddenly.

"My flight leaves Sunday morning, how about your?" she answers.

"I leave on Sunday too" I lie; I will call Andrea and have her reschedule my flight.

"Any chance you would want to meet here tomorrow night?" she blushes and quickly looks away as if she is afraid of rejection.

I lift her chin and kiss her passionately before saying "I would love to."

We dress, leave the room and I walk Rose out of the club to where a line of cabs await. We agree to meet back here tomorrow evening for one last scene before we return to our lives in the states.


	3. Chapter 3

_Author's Note: Thank you for your continued support and feedback! _

_All characters belong to E.L. James_

* * *

**Chpt. 3: Ana's POV**

I return to my hotel that night still in a state of utter bliss from everything that just happened. I am still shocked that I even went to the club let alone had my first scene tonight! I had researched BDSM for awhile before taking this trip and knew it was something I wanted to explore further but I was nervous about finding a club in New York fearing that I would run into someone I know. I had come to the conclusion that I would likely have to find a club outside of the city so I would feel comfortable enough to visit there. I am slowly making my way in the publishing world and just acquired a rather large publishing company based in Seattle before I took this trip. Before this purchase, the companies I owned were relatively small and all based in New York however with the latest purchase I am confident that my name will be well known in the publishing industry in no time. I don't think anyone would recognize me at a club but I don't want to take the chance that someone I once did business with would be there.

Initially I decided to look into BDSM after several failed relationships; most men could not understand the long days I put in at the office. I often take work home with me or with late into the evening completely forgetting about a date that was previously scheduled. I needed someone who understood that they could not have my entire time and who needed to be flexible. I started dating different guys; sometimes those in the business world as well thinking if they worked as many hours as I did surely they would understand. That just more so resulted in a scheduling nightmare when it came time to schedule a dinner out. I was reading a manuscript one night that touched upon BDSM and it caught my interest. I have been so stressed at work with the purchase of this company but even before it with all the employees, the work, the reports…everything. I am in full control of everything in my office and after reading a little about BDSM the thought of giving up control to someone appealed to me. I could never do it in the business world since I need to have full control over everything there, but the idea of someone else having control in the bedroom and over certain other parts of my life sounded reassuring. The only concerns I really had was about the sexual component of BDSM and the punishments. I haven't had many sexual partners; okay really just one and didn't find the sex satisfying at all. However I have been intimate with other men and have reached orgasm so I know I'm not a complete prude who is afraid of sex. I was never physically punished as a child so the thought of being beat with a belt was unappealing to me. However the more research I did, the more I realized that for the most part BDSM is based more on pleasure and less on pain unless the submissive breaks the pre established rules.

Tonight could not have gone any better, I think as I lay back on my bed at the hotel. Taylor was absolutely wonderful in everything he did and took care of me in every way possible. It felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders when we entered that room and I gave up complete control. I somewhat regret not giving him my real name but Madam Serene had explained that almost everyone in the club used an alias so that their personal lives would not cross this part of their life. I liked the idea of keeping it completely separate so I agreed and used my middle name as my alias. I couldn't come up with another name. I was very surprised that Taylor did not use any punishments on me; several times I called out in ecstasy without permission. I couldn't help it, he made me come so hard. Never did I think I would ever be capable of multiple orgasms or coming as hard as I did. Never did I think I would beg to come either. Tonight just proved that this lifestyle is exactly what I need. I vow once I return to Seattle to find a list of all the BDSM clubs outside the city and attend at least one night at a club.

I quickly fall asleep exhausted from tonight's activities but eagerly looking forward to seeing Taylor again tomorrow night. We had agreed to meet at the club around seven which was just after they opened for the night. This club was open well into the wee hours of the morning thus accommodating people who work long and late hours. The next day I tour the city and do some shopping, picking up lingerie to wear for Taylor tonight. I found myself blushing while picking out the lingerie remembering everything that Taylor did the night before. The day drags on as I nervously wait for seven o'clock to come so I can see Taylor again. I'm not sure why I'm nervous; maybe it's anticipation of what he will do tonight? Or if he will want to focus on punishments tonight since last night was about pleasure? I hope tonight is about pleasure as well; tonight is our last night together as I'm sure he doesn't live in New York.

I order dinner from room service and although I'm not hungry I force myself to eat. I can only assume I am going to need stamina for tonight considering how long our scene lasted last night. Before I know it my alarm goes off indicating it's time to get ready; I need to leave for the club in forty-five minutes. I take a long hot shower making sure to my skin is perfectly smooth before getting dressed. I put on my white lace push up bra that has small cut out sections for the nipples; Taylor seemed to enjoy my breasts last night-I hope he likes this bra. I put on the matching white thong underwear which sits very low on my hips and leaves very little to the imagination. I put on a dark red cocktail dress which has cut outs on the sides down to my hips and a plunging deep neckline. Looking in the mirror I am pleased with the outfit; the dress is just tasteful enough that I don't look like a whore. The undergarments make me feel sexy as hell and is giving me the confidence I need to see Taylor tonight.

I throw on a long overcoat and catch a cab to the club. I fork over another $2,500 to Madam Serene who welcomes me back. She says she hopes that I can consider becoming a member here but I tell her that's not possible since I leave tomorrow to return to the states. I affix the pink bracelet to my wrist, check my coat and head to the bar to wait for Taylor. It took less time to get here then I thought so I arrived a good fifteen minutes before Taylor was due to arrive. I order a glass of wine and sit at the bar in the same seat I sat in last night to wait for Christian.

"Can I buy you a drink?" a tall man wearing a black bracelet asks.

"No thank you, I'm fine with my wine" I answer.

There is something about this guy that gives me the creeps. I don't know if it's how he is looking me up and down and licking his lips or what but I don't like him being so close.

"Would you like to get a room with me?" He asks suddenly.

"No, thank you" I repeat. "I'm waiting for someone."

"Well how about I get you ready for him?" he whispers into my ear. "I can make sure you are wet and ready to accept him when he arrives. I can fuck you hard and fast leaving you tied up for him when he finally decides to get here."

"No thank you" I say standing up completely disgusted by this man.

"Fine" he grimaces and grabs my wrist. "How about we go to a room, you get on your knees and I fuck your mouth?"

"Excuse me I believe the lady told you she wasn't interested" Taylor says walking up behind me and pulling me close to him.

"Well if she wasn't interested she shouldn't be wearing pink" he says and angrily storms off.

"Are you okay?" Taylor asks.

"I'm fine; you have perfect timing" I smile.

"Let's get a room" he says as more of a statement then a question as he takes my hand and leads me to the back.

"Same as yesterday" he says as we enter the room and he quickly leaves.

I am taken back by his change in behavior. Yesterday he was caring and kind but today he seems angry and agitated. I quickly remove my dress, folding it and placing it on the table before kneeling on the floor with my eyes down. I remind myself that it doesn't matter if he is angry that I am giving him complete control over my body tonight. I take a few deep breaths calming my nerves and wait for what feels like an hour for Taylor to return. After a while just as my knees are getting sore from being in this position for so long I hear the door open. I don't dare look up but I can tell by his expensive shoes that it is Taylor. I hear him walking around the room before putting several items on the table.

"Stand up" he orders; I immediately comply.

I hear his breath hitch as he takes in my outfit; I inwardly smile knowing that he is pleased by my clothing choices for this evening. He walks very slowly around me taking in the views from all angles, pausing to pinch my nipples which are now erect and poking through the cut outs in the bra.

"What are your safe words?" he asks.

"Yellow and red sir" I answer quickly.

"Did you buy this specifically for tonight?" he asks.

"Yes sir" I answer.

"Did you come here tonight for me or hoping to be with someone else?" he asks.

"No sir! I came here only for your" I am shocked.

His question explains his change in behavior from yesterday; he must have thought that since I wore a pink bracelet I was looking. I assumed pink was still appropriate because I was not committed to someone however I guess in a way I was since I had agreed to meet Taylor here. He puts his wrist in front of my face and I immediately regret my decision; he is wearing yellow.

"I am going to punish you for your mistake now" he says as I gulp. "This is not what I wanted tonight but you allowed another man to think you were available but you had already committed to a scene with me tonight."

He puts a blindfold over my eyes again and hand cuffs on my wrists in front of me and brings me to the center of the room. He lifts my hands above my head and attaches handcuffs to some sort of chain that is attached to the ceiling. He places my ankles in some sort of handcuffs that are attached to a bar. My legs are spread far apart as my arms remain above my head. He must press a button or something because the chain holding my arms shorten and I am stretched tall standing on my tip toes. This is not painful but it is far from comfortable. Suddenly his mouth is on my nipples, forcefully sucking them and I can't help but feel my body responding to him. He attaches a clamp to my nipple; this one is pinching my nipple much tighter than the one he used last night. I had read online that there were different size nipple clamps that would apply different pressure to the nipple. I guess he went with one with a tighter bite to it as part of the punishment I earned. As I breathe through the pain from the clamp, he is again forcefully sucking my other nipple. Despite the pain I again find my body reacting to him and feel my nipple getting harder in his mouth. He quickly pulls away and attaches the other clamp. I can feel my bra is still on as I think the nipple cut outs have come in handy for Taylor tonight. I feel his finger's rubbing my clit roughly which is confusing me as I know I'm supposed to be receiving a punishment. He continues to rub my clit and I find myself trying to move my hips to get him to move his fingers further. Suddenly he pulls his fingers away and I feel a clamp being attached to my clit.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I scream in sudden pain.

Taylor says nothing but pulls my underwear over the clamp which I can only imagine is a smaller version of a nipple clamp made to apply pressure to the clit. He walks around me several times before attaching a chain tightly to my nipple clamps and then other which attaches to the clamp on my clit. He pulls slightly on the chains which pull all three areas at once causing me to gasp. It doesn't necessarily hurt but is quite uncomfortable.

"Count" he barks before I feel a paddle hitting my ass thrusting me forward slightly.

"One" I say tearfully.

It is not overly painful but more embarrassing that this is what I am forced to endure tonight. I know it was my mistake and I deserve the punishment. He hits me five times with the last one being the hardest. I hear the paddle drop to the floor and I sigh in relief that he is finished and that I survived my first BDSM punishment.

"Next time you will remember, you belong to me!" He says and kisses forcefully pulling my body harshly against his.

His mouth is all over mine and his tongue is thrusting in and out of my mouth desperately searching for contact. With my arms above my head and my feet shackled to something I can barely move but I try to express my sorrow and regret in the kiss. He must hit a button because my arms finally come down and he stands me upright before taking my feet out of the shackles. I hear him putting things away but because I'm still blindfolded I can't see what he is doing.

"This is mine" He says kissing me forcefully again on the lips.

"And these" he grabs my breasts and squeezes them harshly.

"And this" he pushes his erection against my clit and pulls my body to him.

"Understand?" He asks.

"Yes sir" I say tearfully again regretting the decision I made to put the pink bracelet on.

He pulls my thong down and I slowly step out of it. He pushes my legs apart and dives into me with his mouth as I just stand there. The clamp is still attached to my clit and intensifies the feeling as he nibbles on my folds licks me with this tongue. He gently inserts a finger in my and moves in back and forth as his other hand tugs ever so slightly on the chain closest to my clit. The feeling is overwhelming and I quickly find myself on the brink of an orgasm. He inserts another finger into me and starts thrusting harder in and out of me as he gently pulls on my folds with his teeth. I am trying so hard to withhold the orgasm not wanting another punishment tonight.

"Come Rose!" he orders removing the clamp from my clit just as I combust on his fingers.

His mouth is immediately on my clit gently sucking it as the blood rushes back to it. I reach down and grab his head holding him closer to me as I ride out the orgasm. As I come down from the orgasm I let go of Taylors' hair embarrassed that I just grabbed his head and held him to my clit. He quickly stands and puts his fingers in my mouth. It felt weird last night when he did this but just as last night I cleaned my juices from his fingers before he kissed me passionately. He takes the chain connecting the two nipple clamps and walks me to the other side of the room. I did not get a good look at the layout of this room before I assumed the sub position which consists of staring at the floor.

"There is a bed behind you, I want you to climb on the bed but I will help you" he says.

I feel a soft mattress against the back of my thighs and awkwardly climb on the bed as my hands are still cuffed in front of me.

"Lay on your stomach further up on the bed with your knees bent" He orders.

I will comply and find myself getting turned on not knowing what he is going to do next. Taylor turns my head the side and then I feel his erection probing my lips. I immediately open my mouth and he gently pushes his erection into my mouth. In this position it's difficult for me to move much so he takes the initiative to slowly move himself in and out of my mouth. My hands remain cuffed below me so I am at his mercy. After a few moments he pulls out of my mouth and I feel him move behind me on the bed. I find myself holding my breath waiting to see what he does next. Last night I wanted him to take me in the worst way but instead he just focused on pleasing me in more ways than I ever thought possible. I feel his hands caressing my ass, no doubt trying to lessen the red marks the paddle left earlier. Suddenly his hand moves down and he begins caressing my folds and gently rubbing my clit. I find myself pushing my hips back to meet his hand, needing more of him. He moves his hand around to my front pinching my clit with his fingers as I feel his erection gently probing my folds.

"Do you want this?" He asks leaning over me pushing his erection further against me.

"Please sir" I beg breathlessly.

He moves his erection around me, coating himself in my juices and teasing me so I push my hips back further trying to get him to slip inside of me. He positions himself at my entry and just puts his head inside of me. I whimper and try to push back wanting to feel him deep inside of me.

"If you keep doing that I will pull out" he says slapping my ass.

His fingers continue to play with my clit as his head sits just inside me leaving me begging for more. He increases the pressure on my clit as my breathing increases and he pushes himself in further. I feel myself stretch and feel some discomfort at the size of his erection. He is much larger than any man I have ever seen and the last time I had sex was a couple of years ago so it feels like I'm losing my virginity all over again.

"You're so tight" Taylor whispers into my ear as he pushes deeper into me.

He gently rocks back and forth, pulling out and pushing in as he rubs my clit with his fingers. Clearly he feels how tight I am and I'm thankful he is taking his time but at the same time my body is craving him. Despite the discomfort I am finding myself close to the edge as he continues to pinch and rub my clit combined with moving in and out of me. Needing more I push myself back and he slides in a little deeper.

"You feel amazing" he says holding my hip and pushing all the way in suddenly.

"HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM" I cry into the bed at the discomfort as he is finally fully inside of me.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

I don't answer. I breathe slowly in and out wiling my body to relax and accept him. He is so large I feel like he is splitting me in two. I feel him tense above me but his fingers continuing to play with my clit this time with more purpose. He is pinching and rubbing my clit while his other hand massages my breast gently tugging on the clamps. Slowly I feel my body relax and the pain subsides.

"Please tell me you're okay Rose?" he asks his voice full of concern. "Do you need to safe word?"

"I'm fine sir" I answer.

"Rose, I'm pausing the scene" he says although I'm not sure that's possible; nothing online said you can pause a scene. "I need you to be honest with me right now."

"I'm okay, I swear" I say. "It was uncomfortable at first but I'm fine now."

"You weren't a virgin were you?" he asks shyly.

"No, but it's been a very long time and I have never been with anyone quite so…..large" I blush.

"But you're okay?" He asks again.

"Yes, I promise" I reassure him and wiggle my hips trying to get his attention back to what we were doing.

He seems to take the hint, kissing me on my cheek he sits upward pulling my hips closer to him which drives him deeper inside of me. I have never felt so full before and it feels amazing as he begins to pull in and out. He starts off slowly but as my breathing picks up so do his movements. He is pulling nearly all the way out and slamming back into me hard and deep hitting my g spot every time he slams into me. I find myself on the brink of an orgasm, teetering there just waiting for his permission to come.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I yell as he suddenly pulls on the chain connected to my nipple clamps.

"Come Rose!" He orders pulling on the chain harder and I come hard as he continues to slam into me.

He pulls out of me quickly and flips my body over as if I were a ragdoll. He releases one of the handcuffs and puts my hand above my head. I'm confused at what he is doing until he pulls my body up, raising my other hand above my head and handcuffing me to the bed. He pulls the blindfold off just as he slams back into me. He mouth is attacking mine as I thrust my hips to try to meet his. He is relentlessly pounding into me and I feel another orgasm quickly building. He pulls out of my suddenly, sitting back and I whimper quietly at the empty feeling. He pulls my legs up and places them over his shoulders before slamming back into me.

"OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I yell; at this angle he feels deeper than before which I didn't think was even possible.

He leans forward, pushing in deeper and holds himself in place kissing me passionately while grabbing my breasts.

"I want to hear you" he whispers into my ear as he pulls all the way out and slams back into me.

"Oh God!" I yell, thankful he finally gave me permission to speak, although I wasn't exactly quiet before.

"You feel so good!" I tell him as he pulls roughly on the chain between my boobs.

"I need to come! Sir I need to come!" I beg as he continues to hit my g spot.

"Not yet, hold it" He orders.

_Is he fucking kidding me?_ I think to myself. I try to hold off the orgasm as long as possible as I want to please Taylor and as a sub I did give him complete control over everything including my orgasms. He pulls all the way out and slams into me several more times before leaning over me kissing me passionately. He moves his hips around slightly hitting both my g spot and my clit at the same time just as he tugs on the nipple clamps.

"OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! PLEASE!" I yell as he pulls off the nipple clamps. I am about to come and I don't think I can stop it as he continues to hit both areas driving me closer and closer to the edge.

"Come with me Rose!" He orders pushing deeper into me.

Just as he says that I explode around him; he screams my name and I feel him empty himself into me. He continues to slowly move in and out of me while kissing me deeply allowing me to ride out the orgasm as long as possible. He releases my legs, but doesn't pull out of me as he rests his head on my breast.

"I never did tell you how much I love his bra" he says taking my very sore and sensitive nipple in his mouth and gently sucking on it.

"Ah" I say at the tender feeling left by clamps. "No you didn't."

We lay like this for a while before he pulls out of me and goes to the bathroom to wash up. He returns with a washcloth and gently cleans me up. As I stand up I feel his come trickle down my leg and it's at that moment I realize he didn't use a condom.

"Shit!" I say.

"What's wrong?" Taylor asks putting his shirt and boxers on.

"We didn't use a condom" I answer.

"Oh God!" he says shocked. "I am so sorry, I got caught up in the moment and then you felt so good when I finally got inside of you. I was going to pull out but you gripped me so tight I couldn't even if I wanted to."

"I'm on the pill and I'm clean; how about you?" I ask.

"I'm clean, I swear" he reassures me. "I had a complete physical less than six months ago and since then I haven't been with anyone."

"Okay" I sigh in relief.

Taylor comes up behind me and pulls me close to him kissing me deeply. God I am going to miss this man when I leave tomorrow I think.

"Can we talk?" he asks.

"Sure" I walk over to the table to grab my clothes.

"No clothes" he says.

"Okay…." I sit on the couch in only a bra.

"Are you hungry?" he asks.

"I could use something light" I admit.

"I will be right back" Taylor says leaving the room.

Just as quickly he returns saying he ordered burgers from the bar and asked someone to bring them to our room. It's nearly eleven so the club is still open for several more hours and I think Taylor is not wanting to the night to end either.

"Did you enjoy tonight?" He asks.

"Yes I did" I answer honestly.

"What about the punishment?" he asks looking away from me.

"Hey," I pull his face so he is looking at me and I kiss him deeply. "It's part of the lifestyle, right? Once you explained I realized I broke a rule and I accepted my punishment. It was only fair and as a Dom you were right to punish me."

"And what about on the bed? Did you enjoy that?" he asks shyly.

"Yes Taylor I did" I answer. "Yes it hurt initially, but you were wonderful and patient waiting for the pain to subside allowing my body to accept you."

"Can I ask…how many partners have you had?" he asks.

"One" I sigh.

"What? One?" he's shocked. "Why? Surely you have men falling at your feet being as beautiful as you are."

"Just one" I confirm. "And honestly the sex with him was okay; I rarely would have an orgasm during sex. I have dated of course, but my work schedule always seems to interfere with dating. It really just never worked out."

"Sounds like me" he says. "Dating never fit into my life."

Just then there is a knock on the door, enter the small bathroom that is off the playroom as Taylor opens the door and takes our food. I use the bathroom and wash up before returning to the room where Taylor has set up the food on the table. We eat dinner and make small chit chat as we eat careful not to disclose too much about each other. We avoid discussing what will happen when we leave tonight as we both know it can't continue.

"Are you sore?" Taylor asks suddenly after he puts our plates on the tray on the corner of the table.

"No" I say blushing that he even asked that.

He walks over to me, pulling me up and kissing me passionately. I run my fingers through is hair; something I have wanted to do since last night but my hands are usually cuffed. He reaches around and unclips my bra; my hands fall to my sides quickly allowing the bra to fall off before returning to his hair. His hands massage my breasts, gently pinching my nipples which are already hard and very sensitive from the clamps earlier. I feel his erection growing as he pushes himself against my clit gently. In a bold move, I unbutton his pants and push them down before taking his erection in my hand stroking him. He moans into my mouth as I continue stroking him. He gently pushes on my shoulders guiding me to my knees as he removes his underwear.

"Suck me" he orders pulling my head to his erection.

I eagerly take him into my mouth as deep as I can on the first try. He is so large that it is difficult to fit all of him in my mouth. I focus on sucking his head and licking him up and down while massaging his balls. He puts his hand on my head guiding back to him as he gently pushes deep into my mouth. I nearly gag as he hits the back of my throat but I breathe slowly relaxing my throat muscles. Taylor must sense my relaxation as he quickly begins moving in and of my mouth hitting the back of my throat every few thrusts. Suddenly he stops and pulls me up kissing me deeply.

"I need you again" he says pushing his erection between my legs rubbing it against my clit.

"Yes sir" I say grinding myself against him further.

He pushes me against the wall, lifting me and impales me onto him roughly as I hold on to his shoulders. He thrusts in and out of me hard but it is not as deep at this angle. He senses that this position is not working as well and brings me over to bed where he lays me on my back as he stands next to bed.

"OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I say as he suddenly pulls out and slams hard back into me.

My legs are wrapped around his waist as my hands grip the sheets on the bed as he continues to plunge into me. He grabs pinches my nipple with one hand as the other plays with my clit as he continues his attack on me. I don't know how it's possible, but I quickly feel an orgasm approaching. I have never come so many times in my life let alone all in one day!

"Please" I beg.

"Harder and deeper?" He asks but I think he knows the answer.

"Yes!" I exclaim. "Yes sir, please sir."

With that, he let's go and starts fucking me hard and deep just like before. Every time he slams into me he is hitting my g spot and pushing me closer to an orgasm. He takes a hold of my hips with both hands so he focuses on fucking me hard.

"Play with your tits" he says.

I immediately comply and begin playing with my breasts just as he was moments ago.

"Pinch your nipples" he commands.

"Harder, like I was doing" He says seeing I'm only lightly pinching them.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH" I say pinching them harder just as he plunges into me hard.

"Come Rose!" He orders and I combust around him holding him tightly in place.

He pulls me close to him, holding me but not pulling out. He carries me over to the couch while sucking on my nipples as he walks. He sits down as I move my legs so I am straddling him. Immediately I feel the difference as he moves deeper inside of me when he pushes my hips down further so I am completing seated on him. He grabs my face and kisses me passionately as I begin to ride him in this new position.

"Don't touch my chest please" he whispers.

I grab hold of the back of the couch and continue riding him. He takes my nipple in his mouth every time it comes close enough for him to reach and his hands continue to explore my body. I am enjoying the control I have in this position as I quickly approach another orgasm. Taylor's fingers find my clit as he can sense I'm getting closer to another orgasm.

"Don't stop" he commands. "Faster and harder but don't come."

_Again with the not coming? UGH!_ I do as he orders, lifting myself so I am almost completely off of him before slamming myself down.

"OH God!" I say as I slam into him hard while he pinches my nipple.

"Let me hear you and I will let you come soon" he commands.

"Yes! Yes!" I yell.

I reach back and hold onto his legs while riding him; this change in position has him not only deeper in me but hitting my g spot perfectly.

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHH" This is also the perfect position for him play with my clit which is going to push me over the edge.

"Come Rose!" He says as he reaches his own orgasm which triggers mine and I come hard as I continue to ride him wanting my orgasm to last.

I lay my head on his shoulder and run my fingers through his hair as we both wait for our breathing to return to normal. I know this time is the last time I will ever see Taylor but I will always be grateful for his introduction into this lifestyle. He pulls me against him tightly; the soft fabric of his shirt rubs against my overly sensitive nipples.

"I'm going to get washed up" I say gently climbing off of him and almost immediately I feel utterly empty.

I sit in the bathroom and take a few deep breaths willing myself not to cry as I think about tonight ending. There is no way for this to continue and it would be pointless to try. I return to the playroom finding Taylor fully dressed waiting for me. I reach for my clothes but he takes them and insists on dressing me.

"Would you like a drink?" he asks trying to prolong the night.

"I shouldn't" I answer. "I have an early flight tomorrow well today."

"I….." he stutters.

"I know" I sigh; neither of us know what to say. "I want to thank you for the last two days. You were gentle, patient and kind with me which I will forever be grateful for."

"Rose…you helped me find the control that was lacking in my life and I will always owe you for that" he says kissing me passionately and holding me close to his body.

"Good bye Taylor" I say walking out of the room before I start crying.

"Bye Rose" I hear him say before the door shuts.

I quickly leave the club and get in the first cab I find heading back to the hotel. I barely shut the door of the hotel room before the tears fall. I never expected to feel this way about someone I have known for less than 24 hours but the connection I feel to him is so strong. I don't know if it's because of BDSM or if is something more.


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note: thank you for your feedback and support! I love reading your comments and your guesses at how they will meet up again.

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James & The Fifty Shades Trilogy_

**Chpt. 4: Christian's POV**

"Andrea get me Taylor!" I say.

"Yes Mr. Grey" Andrea says rushing back to her desk.

I have been back from Taiwan for about a couple of weeks now; the deal with the shipyard is finally settled. The first week or so I was back was great; I was able to handle the stress at work with minimal snapping at my staff. However as the first week came to end I found myself losing control again, snapping at everyone left and right. Only half the time there was a justified reason. Even Ros said she wished I would "get some" which she attributes to my changed before when I came back from Taiwan.

"Yes Mr. Grey?" Taylor asks stepping into my office.

"Close the door" I request. "Have a seat."

"Yes sir" Taylor sits in the chair in front of my desk.

"While I was in Taiwan, I visited a certain type of a club" I say somewhat embarrassed to have to disclose this to Taylor.

"Sir?" Taylor asks.

"While I was at the club I met a beautiful woman named Rose from the states. I want you to find her for me, this is the name and address of the club" I say handing him a piece of paper with the information he needs.

"Do you have a last name?" Taylor asks.

"No" I sigh. "But the club would have record of everyone who entered the club that night.

"What night were you there?" Taylor asks.

"Friday and Saturday nights" I answer.

"I will see what I can find" he says leaving the office.

I can't stop thinking of Rose; she was beautiful and perfect if every way possible. She responded wonderfully to me and I felt like we connected on a much deeper level. Once I saw the effect of having complete control in the bedroom had, I realized this was exactly what I needed in my life. The problem is I can't imagine having it with anyone else, I want Rose as my sub and need Taylor to find her.

"Mr. Grey?" Andrea asks through the intercom a couple days later.

"Yes?" I respond.

"Mr. Taylor is asking to see you" she says.

"Send him in" I answer.

"Mr. Grey I have some information for you" Taylor says shutting the door and sitting in front of my desk.

"Well?" I ask.

"The club will not turn over its guest list from that night and before you ask, yes I offered to buy it. As much as I know you want the list, I think this should reassure you that the press can't just purchase it and learn about your attendance" he smirks. "They did check through their records though from that night and they have no one buy the name of Rose signed in. The owner did state though that the clients are encouraged to use an alias. Perhaps Rose was an alias?"

"SHIT!" I yell throwing my phone across the room. "That means I have no way to find her!"

"Not without a real name sir" Taylor apologizes leaving my office.

Several months go by and I realize I cannot continue like this. I have no interest in dating again and have spent hours learning more and more about the BDSM community and lifestyle. I am convinced that this is exactly what I need; I need to give up on the idea of only having it with Rose. It's obvious that I'm never going to find her again. I have found several exclusive BDSM clubs in the Seattle area and have had background checks completed on all of them. There is one club that stands out, not only is the membership price more than what some people earn in a year but they have ties to the club I met Rose at in Taiwan. Seeing this as a sign, I decide to visit it Friday night.

"Taylor, let's go" I say coming down the stairs of the penthouse.

"Yes sir" he says.

"Take me to the Red Room on 57th Street" I direct.

After completing the initial paperwork, reviewing the club rules and handing over the obscene membership fee I am finally permitted to enter the bar. I order a drink and take in the scene before me; there are people everywhere each wearing a bracelet again indicating their status. There are several small tables and chairs through the room as well as some couches. Scantily clad wait staff bring drinks and appetizers to the guests. There is a woman being spanked with a paddle in clear view of everyone; I assume this is some type of punishment for her. This is one thing I am not comfortable with in the BDSM lifestyle; I will not engage in the open in this lifestyle. I want everything done behind closed doors.

I leave the club that night after a couple of hours; no one catches my attention like Rose did. However a month or so later I return to the club after a deal fell through at GEH and I was in desperate need of regaining control. I needed to do something to get control again and this was the only thing that I could think of.

"Hello, may I sit?" I ask approaching a young woman who was sitting at the bar.

"Yes sir" she says immediately looking at the floor.

She is wearing a very skimpy red dress that would be inappropriate in any other setting. Her plump breasts are overflowing from the dress which barely covers her ass as she is sits on the bar stool. She is wearing a red bracelet indicating that she is an experienced sub looking for a dom.

"Do you need a drink?" I ask.

"No sir" she says never looking up from the floor.

"Would you like to get a room and discuss things further?" I ask.

"Yes sir" she responds standing up from the stool.

She follows me with her head bowed the entire way to the room. We enter the room and I see it is set up similar to the rooms in Taiwan, which immediately brings Rose into my mind.

"Do you have a list of your limits?" I ask.

"Yes sir" she says handing me a piece of paper.

"Here are mine, please take a moment and read them thoroughly" I say.

I read her limits and notice there are very few listed as hard limits; she is even agreeable to some of the items that I am against.

"I am in agreement with your limits. Are you in agreement with mine?" I ask.

"Yes sir" she answers.

"Do you have safewords?" I ask.

"Yes sir" she answers. "Butterflies and Bees."

"I want you to strip to your bra and panties and assume the position by the door" I order as I walk around the room.

"Yes sir" she says immediately complying without looking at me.

I have not planned on this scene however I gather a few items that I would like to try and decide to see how things go.

"Stand" I order as I return to her.

I slowly walk around her taking her body in. She is wearing a red lace see through bra with a matching thong. Her body is beautiful but for some reason I do not feel my body reacting to her yet. I place her hands behind her back but do not secure them yet; since she is supposed to be an experienced sub I believe she will keep them in place. I place a blindfold over her eyes as I don't want her to see what is going to happen. I return to her front and take her nipple into my mouth without any warning. She does not say anything but I can hear her breathing hitch indicating her pleasure. As her nipple hardens in my mouth, I attach a medium size nipple clamp. I turn to the other nipple and repeat the process. A chain connects the two clamps and I guide her over to the cross affixed to the one wall. I assist in her stepping up on the footrests and secure her wrists above her head before attaching her feet with cuffs. I take a riding crop out and begin to lash it against her. I alternate spots all over her body along with the force in which I am hitting with it. After a good thirty minutes of this, I turn the focus to her clit and begin hitting her gently there which I can tell she enjoys because her breathing is fast and her face is flushed.

"Do you need to come?" I ask.

"If you think I need to" she answers breathless.

I walk over to her, reach into her underwear and gently pinch her clit. She must be a well trained sub as she does not move and minimally whimpers at this action. Her underwear are drenched in evidence of her excitement. I return to the table where I left several toys, grabbing a small vibrator I return to the cross before putting it in her underwear against her clit. Her breathing hitches immediately as her body tenses. I watch her begin to squirm at the sensation as I tug on the chain attached to her nipple clamps gently.

"You may come" I order.

"Thank you sir!" she yells as her body contorts in pleasure.

Once she comes down from the orgasm, I take her off the cross and guide her over to the spanking bench. I hand cuff her to the bench and move in front of her.

"Open" I command of which she immediately complies.

I take my erection out of my underwear and while it is only minimally hard I move closer and put it in her mouth. She immediately accepts it and begins sucking me trying to make me harder. I move in and out of her mouth trying to find some pleasure in it and while I am getting harder I am not able to find a release.

"Enough" I order pulling out of her mouth.

I pick up a paddle and begin spanking her ass, making her count as we go. I don't hit her very hard as this is not a punishment for her but a demonstration of control on my end. Her juices are flowing down her thighs as I put the paddle back on the table. I reach into her underwear finding her clit hard, applying a small amount of pressure causes her to gasp loudly in anticipation. Doubting I can find my own release, I decide to end this session quickly by allowing her to come again. I pull her off the bench and stand her in the middle of the room. I affix the handcuffs above her head and raise them so she is on her tip toes. I pull her underwear down and push her legs apart roughly. Without warning I slam a medium size dildo inside of her deeply and she moans in excitement. I pull it out of her and slam it back in several times as she struggles to maintain her balance.

"Come" I order and she immediately complies.

As her orgasm is complete, I remove the dildo placing it back on the table and I release her arms from above her head.

"You may get dressed" I say.

"Sir?" she asks clearly surprised that I did not request that she satisfy me.

"I said you may get dressed" I repeat and finally she complies.

I straighten up my clothing and finish the drink I brought in with me.

"Is there anything you need?" I ask gently.

"No sir" she says sadly.

"It isn't you" I say leaving the room.

**Ana's POV:**

I've been back in New York for a couple months since my trip to Taiwan and I can't stop thinking of Taylor. His introduction into BDSM was exactly what I needed and it helped me realize that giving someone complete control in the bedroom resulted in me feeling less stressed out. Coming back from Taiwan I felt more confident and more in control at work then I had in years. However as the months pass by I feel myself losing that control and I am desperate to feel that way again.

"Hi Kate!" I say answering my phone.

"Steele! How are you?" my best friend asks.

"Good, really well actually" I answer.

"Oh?" she asks.

"I'm moving back to Seattle" I announce.

"WHAT? WHEN?" she yells into the phone.

"Calm down Kate! Probably not for a few months yet, I need to sell my condo here, find a place to live in Seattle and relocate a few key staff members" I explain.

"What brought this sudden move on?" she asks.

"I bought Seattle Independent Publishing and since it is so well established in Seattle it makes sense for me to move" I answer.

"I'm so excited! I can't wait to see you! Oh and you have to meet my new boyfriend, Elliot! You will love him!" she exclaims.

"Sure Kate! Listen, I have to go. I will call you soon" I say hanging up.

Kate and her boyfriends, I think sighing. Kate and I have been friends since college and she has never had a boyfriend for more than a month or so. I'm sure by the time I move to Seattle this boyfriend will be history and she will have moved onto someone else. I have no interest in dating since returning from Taiwan and feel more strongly than ever that the BDSM lifestyle is exactly what I need in my life. More so, I feel Taylor is what I need in my life. However, I know there is no way I can find him; Taylor is probably not even his real name since we were all encouraged to use an alias when we entered the club.

Over the last several months I have been visiting a BDSM club just outside of New York. I was nervous at first, fearing that I would run into someone I did business with so I found a very exclusive very expensive club. I couldn't bring myself to engage in any acts at the club so I always chose the yellow bracelet indicating I was just there to watch. A couple times I was able to watch a few sessions, not for a sexual release but so I could learn more about the lifestyle and the interaction between a sub and a dom. I quickly learned what type of Dom I didn't want as there were several who believed in humiliation as a form of punishment. They would often initiate punishment in the main room in front of the members which I could never find myself agreeing to. Other Dom's would lead their subs around with a leash making the subs crawl on the floor on all fours. That is something else I would never agree to; I may give the Dom complete control in the bedroom but I don't want to be treated as an animal.

As I became a frequent visitor at this club, Dom's would occasionally approach me and try to get me to participate in a scene with them but I always turned them away. I was content learning more about the lifestyle for now. Although I found watching the scenes a turn on, I was not ready to take that step with someone. I felt that in order to take that next step I needed to find someone I could trust; the only person I would completely trust right now is Taylor. I know I need to give up on the idea that I'm going to find him again but in the meantime I am content with what I'm doing. Learning more about BDSM is providing me a small amount of control again at work; it's not nearly close to what is was after my scenes with Taylor but at least it's something.

"Stacy!" I call to my assistant.

"Yes Ms. Steele?" she asks.

"Book me a flight to Seattle next month with hotel accommodations for at least two to three weeks" I request. "I want to start setting up at SIP and finding an apartment to rent; be sure to have a realtor line of a few listings for my time there."

"Yes ma'am, any date specifically?" she answers.

"Let me get back to you. See what you can arrange on my schedule" I say dismissing her as my cell phone rings.

"Hi Kate" I answer the phone.

"Hey Steele!" she exclaims happily. "What are you doing on the 23rd of next month?"

"I'm not sure…what day of the week is it?" I say waiting for my calendar to load.

"Saturday, I've been invited to a charity ball and got an extra ticket for you" she says.

"I was just talking with Stacy about flying to Seattle next month so I should be able to make it work" I explain.

"Really? That's great! This is just the type of place you need to come to begin networking in Seattle; anyone who is anyone in this city will be there" she says.

"I should be there for at least two to three weeks; I'm hoping to get set up at SIP and find an apartment to rent" I reply.

"So then that's it you would be living here?" she asks shocked.

"Well I would have to fly back and pack my place up here unless I hire someone to do it. But yes, ultimately I would then be living in Seattle again" I answer.

"Yeah! I'm so excited!" She exclaims before hanging up the phone.

As the weeks pass and the trip to Seattle gets closer, I find myself beyond stressed. I need to give up the control and visiting the BDSM just to watch isn't working any longer. On my last night in the city, I decide to try a scene with a dom at the club just to see if it would help. I update my limits which now reflect sexual intercourse as a hard limit. I'm not ready to be that intimate with a dom but I'm hoping giving up just enough control will help. As I arrive at the club, I surprise the owner by taking a pink bracelet and make my way to the bar. I order a vodka tonic and observe the crowd tonight.

"May I sit?" a young man asks approaching me.

"Yes sir" I answer quickly.

"I would like to speak freely for a moment" he says pulling my face up so I am no longer looking at the floor.

"Yes sir" I respond looking at him.

"I've seen you here before but you typically have yellow on your wrist, tonight you are wearing pink" he points out.

"Yes sir" I answer.

"Are you interested in participating in a scene?" he asks.

"Yes sir" I answer.

"Please join me" He states rather than asks as he takes my hand and leads me away from the bar.

"Do you have your limits with you?" He asks as we enter a room that is barely lit.

"Yes sir" I hand him my list.

"I see" he says hesitantly. "I see sexual intercourse is a hard limit, is this correct?"

"Yes sir" I answer.

"Very well, here is my limit list" he sighs providing me his list.

We quickly agree that are limits are compatible and he orders me to strip out of all my clothes. I immediately miss Taylor's gentle approach which allowed me to become more comfortable with what was going on but I remind myself this about giving up control and trusting the Dom enough to know what I need. My eyes are quickly blindfolded and I force myself to relax. I hear him moving around the room, opening and closing the drawers but I'm not sure what he is doing. I sense him near me just before I feel his mouth latch onto my nipple harshly. He sucks my nipple for several minutes until he is satisfied that it is hard enough and he affixes a small nipple clamp to it. I breath through the pain, glad it is not as large as the one that Taylor used as a punishment for me. His mouth is quickly upon my other nipple sucking it hard and affixing another clamp to it.

"Your tits look perfect clamped" he says as I feel him staring at me.

A tight chain is attached to the clamps which pull them closer together adding a slight feeling of pain. He seems to attach another chain to that one which he leads me around the room with. For a moment I feel like he is parading me around but we seem to stop quickly as he finds his destination.

"Bend over" he says gently pushing my head down.

I feel myself being bent over the arm of a leather seat or couch as I feel his fingers pressing against my clit. He rubs my clit repeatedly and slowly inserts a finger inside of me. Although I'm not drenched yet, my body is slowly responding and my excitement is becoming more evident. Suddenly and without warning I feel him insert something inside of me. I can't tell what it is but it feels rather large and as he pulls me up I feel it to start to vibrate.

"Don't drop it or you will be punished, understood?" He asks leading me around the room by the chain again.

"Yes sir" I respond clenching my thighs to keep the foreign object from falling out as I'm walking.

We walk around the room for several minutes before he attaches me to the spanking bench as I have now learned it is called. My hands are attached to the bottom and he pushes gently on my back which increases the pressure on the clamps attached to my nipples.

Without warning I feel small beads hitting my ass and I realize he is hitting me with cat tails. It doesn't hurt but causes the blood to rise to the surface increasing the feeling. He covers my ass and my sex repeatedly with the beads until I am on the edge of an orgasm. Sensing my need he quickly pulls me and stands me in the middle of the room so he can use the cat tails on my front. He hits my breasts repeatedly which are already overly sensitive because of the clamps before hitting my clit harshly.

"Come" he orders yanking the clamps off my nipples and turning up the vibration on whatever is inside of me.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I cry out as the orgasm hits hard.

His lips are on my nipples again, this time more gently as the blood slowly returns to them. He pushes my legs apart gently before reaching inside of me to pull out the vibrating thing that was inside of me.

"On your knees" he orders and I immediately comply.

"Open your mouth" he directs and as soon as I comply he shoves his erection deep in my throat.

Thankfully he is not as big as Taylor was so I can easily fit in my mouth without gagging. He takes my face in both his hands and holds it still as he begins to fuck my mouth. He starts off slowly allowing me to get accustomed to his actions but he quickly picks up speed and pushes himself deep into my mouth each time. I am having problems focusing and breathing with all his movements but I stay focused reminding myself this is what giving up complete control is about. With no warning he empties himself into my mouth and I struggle to swallow.

He pulls the blind fold off of me and pulls me up as he tucks himself back into his pants. He hands me my clothes along with a bottle of water before leaving the room. I find myself feeling very used even though I achieved an orgasm. The coldness of him and his approach was the complete opposite of Taylor. While I felt more relaxed leaving the scene, I found it left me wishing I could find Taylor more and more.


	5. Chapter 5

_All characters belong to E.L. James & the Fifty Shades of Grey Trilogy_

**Chpt. 5: Ana's POV: **

"Ms. Steele?" Stacy knocks on my door.

"Come in Stacy" I wave to an empty chair in front of my desk.

"Here's your cup of tea" she hands me a fresh cup of hot tea. "I thought we could review your schedule?"

"Of course…thank you" I say.

"I have a flight booked for you to Seattle tomorrow morning and hotel reservations at The Heathman which is only a few blocks from SIP. The reservations for three weeks but they are aware you may extend the reservation longer if you do not find a permanent residence. I have a realtor sending you several listings via email however I have asked her to hold off on scheduling any appointments until next week. You will arrive Wednesday mid afternoon in Seattle; there is nothing on your schedule when you arrive. Thursday morning you have a meeting with Mr. Roach at SIP" Stacy explains.

"Perfect, thank you Stacy" I say dismissing her.

"Oh Stacy?" I ask before she exits the office.

"Yes Ms. Steele" Stacy replies.

"Can you please ask Bob to pull information on a company called Seattle E books?" I ask.

"Yes Ms. Steele" Stacy answers closing the door behind her.

Over the weekend I was researching the downtown Seattle area and found a small company called Seattle E books which appears to focus exclusively on electronic books. This is the area that SIP is lacking in as they have yet to branch into the world of electronic publications which is where the industry is moving towards. It would make sense to try to bring Seattle E books under the umbrella of SIP which would allow both companies to continue successfully in the industry. The key will be seeing if Seattle E books is struggling financially so I can use that angle to purchase the company. If not I will need to find a different angle to approach the owners with. Bob, my head of finance, should be able to access their financial records relatively quickly and provide his opinion on the best approach to motivate the owners to sell.

I am excited to be returning to Seattle tomorrow; I really enjoyed my time in Portland when I was in college. I had always hoped to stay in Seattle but when I received a job offer in New York I couldn't refuse and picked up and moved across the country. Of course Kate was devastated as we had always assumed we would both move to Seattle after graduation. However we have stayed in touch over the years, talking at least weekly and have even been able to see each other when vacations allowed. Most of my key personnel have agreed to move to Seattle with the company however a few have decided to take positions elsewhere and I have provided them with a generous bonus with recommendations. All who have chosen not to relocate have found comparable positions already which I am pleased about. Stacy and Bob have both agreed to relocate; neither of which I could have done without. They will follow me in the next two months once we have everything at SIP established and the office here is closed.

The day passes by quickly as I prepare everything I need to bring to Seattle. Stacy will arrange for most of the office to be packed and ship over the next couple of weeks therefore I am only taking what I think I will need. If I forget something I will either purchase it in Seattle or have Stacy send it overnight to SIP. Picking up and moving across country this time is less nerve wracking than when I first moved to New York since I knew no one in this state let alone this very large city. However New York has since became my home and I am going to miss the hustle and bustle of the city when I return to Seattle.

"Ms. Steele?" Stacy interrupts my thoughts knocking on the door.

"Yes Stacy" I answer.

"Bob is here for you" She says.

"Please send him in" I reply.

Bob has been with me almost since day one and I have come to trust his financial guidance and insight. He absolutely refuses to allow anyone to call him Mr. Jones or even Robert, insisting everyone call him Bob.

"Are you ready for your trip Ms. Steele?" Bob asks sitting in the chair across from me.

"I believe so, how about you? Are the kids excited?" I ask.

"They can't wait!" Bob exclaims proudly. "They have already started packing even though we don't leave for several weeks yet! Thank you again for setting up the long term apartment rental for us; I think you were right that we will need some time in Washington before we decide where we want to buy a house."

"No problem" I reply. "Do you have the information on Seattle E books?"

We spend the next hour carefully reviewing the financial records of Seattle E books. Bob recommends that we make an offer to purchase using the financial distress angle as they will likely have to file for bankruptcy in the next year or two without additional support. They have done an outstanding job in marketing themselves with electronic publications but they are missing out purchases by those who still like a good hard covered book. Bob agrees that we should look to have them head up the electronic publication division of SIP if we were to successfully merge the two companies. This would allow SIP to take the industry by storm; having both key publication mechanisms under the same roof. I asked Stacy to arrange a meeting with the owners of Seattle E books for Friday or early Monday morning.

_Seattle, Thursday Morning still Ana's POV:_

"Good Morning Ms. Steele" Mr. Roach says as I enter his office.

"Morning Mr. Roach" I reply.

"We have a tour of the office scheduled for you this morning which we will end at your new office. Stacy has shipped several boxes here already which we have unpacked and filed in your office per her specifications. You have a meeting scheduled with HR to review all personnel files at 11am followed by a meeting with finance at 2pm" Mr. Roach explains.

"Thank you" I say.

The day is spent touring the building, introducing myself to various staff members and meeting with key personnel. I quickly miss Stacy and how smoothly she had my office run as I find myself disorganized and confused as to where everything has been placed. It's going to be a long couple of weeks until Stacy is able to move out here as she needs to tie up loose ends at the other office however she will continue to assist me from a distance when possible. After meeting with HR, I realize we have a few personnel issues that will need to be addressed relatively quickly. I have requested all new background checks be completed on all employees seeing as though many have been with SIP for several years without new background checks run. There are a few who have questionable criminal records which I need to look into further and a couple others who should have been terminated for poor job performance some time ago. Overall though there were no major surprises from when we reviewed everything before the purchase was finalized.

I have a meeting with Mr. and Mrs. Snyder, the owners of Seattle E books tomorrow morning which I'm excited about. They are a husband and wife team who started the company almost five years ago; she has published several electronic novels while he seems to be the one who runs the business itself. I spend the night learning as much as I can about the couple and the business from the information that Bob provided me.

"Good Morning, I have an appointment with Mr. and Mrs. Snyder" I say after being greeted by the administrative assistant.

"Please have a seat and I will let them know you are here" a young woman dressed casually says.

"Ms. Steele, please follow me" the young woman says a short time later.

I am shown into a small conference room where a middle aged couple sits at the table talking quietly. One look at them and you can tell they are happily married; they rarely take their eyes off of one another and smile casually at each other. I quickly make a small tweak to my approach, given they seem to be the type to be less motivated about the money and more motivated by the business itself. I know that if I am going to be successful I need to appeal to the both of them which means talking about the finances but also focusing on her passion for writing and books.

"Good Morning Ms. Steele" Mr. Snyder says shaking my hand.

"It's a pleasure to meet the both of you" I say shaking both of their hands. "Thank you for taking the time to meet with me."

"We were hesitant at first but your assistant can be very persuading" Mrs. Snyder says.

"That she can" I say laughing; Stacy is very good at what she does.

"Before we begin, I want to be honest with you and let you know that we had a meeting yesterday with another company who is interested in purchasing our company as well" Mr. Snyder says.

This surprises me, however I try to hide any signs of it from my face. Nothing came up in Bob's review of the company so it must be a very new interest. This puts a little more pressure on me but I am confident that I can appeal to both the owners.

"I appreciate your honesty," I begin. "However, I want to make it clear that I am not interested in purchasing your company in the typical sense."

"I'm sorry?" Mr. Snyder says obviously confused.

"Let me explain" I provide them both with the written proposal. "As you may know, I have recently purchased Seattle Independent Publishing which is located just a couple of blocks away. I am proposing that rather than purchasing your company and operating two separate companies that we merge the two companies. You would still maintain the hold you currently have the electronic publishing portion of the industry while SIP would maintain the printed publication section. You both are struggling because you are missing the other consumers; this proposal brings you both together. Mrs. Snyder, can you imagine the electronic novels you have published in written format? Think about the broader audience you could attract."

"I have felt like we are missing people who don't have e readers" Mrs. Snyder says quietly.

"How would this work?" Mr. Snyder says sitting up straighter, now taking interest.

"Well, from what I can tell you seem to have a very strong team working for you as you have managed to publish several high selling electronic publications. Unless you disagree, I would recommend you maintain all your key personnel so you don't lose the foot you have in this industry" I explain. "By partnering with SIP, you would begin electronically publishing their material as well as your own. This would likely mean you would need additional staff, however there might be staff at SIP who could assist or we could seek outside assistance. SIP in turn would publish your higher selling electronic material that we believe would result in high consumer purchasing. We will have weekly staff meetings involving the heads of both companies where we would decide what material are published, when and how."

"I see…."Mr. Snyder says taking it all in.

"We would share resources between the two companies including HR, financial, payroll, accounting, etc… however we would look to maintain staff from both companies where possible. This would be the only place I would anticipate seeing staffing concerns however rest assured that any staff who were not retained would be offered a significant compensation plan for their troubles along with letters of references" I explain further.

"This is a lot to take in" Mrs. Snyder sighs.

"Of course, trust me I understand this decision is not an easy one for you to make" I smile at both of them. "However, I think it's only important for your two to remain involved and in control over the company that you built together. This is your baby, it's not going to be easy to let someone else influence it. However, I think we need to provide it with some encouragement and opportunity if it is going to grow."

"Thank you for your time, we will contact you in the next day or two" Mr. Snyder says walking me out.

The next couple of days pass by and I am on more on edge than ever. With everything up in the air with Seattle E Books, the changes with SIP and the move I find myself spinning out of control. I am more in need than ever of someone else taking control. A couple times I have been tempted to find a BDSM club in Seattle but I'm hesitant since I don't know the city and I'm in the middle of a major deal. What if someone in the industry saw me? What if the club wasn't as secure as I thought? What if another company can buy the member information?

**Christian's POV:**

"Andrea! Get me Ros!" I bellow.

"Yes Mr. Grey" Andrea responds quickly closing the door behind her.

"Why Hello Christian" Ros says entering my office. "So nice of you to _ask_ to seem me."

"What is going on with the Seattle E Books deal? Weren't we supposed to have a decision by now?" I ask, ignoring her tone.

"They were supposed to provide us with a decision yesterday however they called and requested a two day extension. It turns out someone else has approached them and they want time to consider each proposal" she explains.

"What? Who is the other company?" I demand; when we met with them earlier in the week there was no one else expressing interest.

"From what we can tell it's SIP" Ros answers.

"What? I thought they were in financial trouble as well" I'm confused now. I briefly looked into SIP however decided I wanted to follow technology which led me to Seattle E Books.

"SIP was recently purchased and it seems the new owners have met with Seattle E Books" Ros explains.

"Who is the new owner of SIP?" I ask.

"Anastasia Steele of New York" Ros answers.

"Who the fuck is she? What is she doing purchasing SIP if she is in New York?" I scream.

"It seems she owned a relatively small publishing company in New York that had several bestselling authors' sign with it. Her company actually did very well considering the size" Ros explains without flinching at my outburst. "The sale of SIP was finalized a couple of weeks ago however since you had said you weren't interested in SIP any longer we stopped monitoring their actions and turned our attention to Seattle E Books. When Mr. Snyder requested an extension I dug a little further into Ms. Steele and learned that she is in the process of merging her publishing company in New York with SIP. It appears her intention is for SIP to remain in Seattle."

"Damn it!" I thrown my phone against the wall watching it break into pieces scattered all over the floor. "Call Mr. Snyder back and increase the buyout price to 2.5 million."

"No problem Christian" Ros says leaving my office. "I will tell Andrea you need another one. What is that your fifth or sixth this month? You need to go back to Taiwan."

"What?" I ask confused.

"You obviously got laid or something in Taiwan and the weeks after you got back you were much calmer. But since then you are back to your crazy self. Just saying…maybe you need to hire-" she begins.

"Shut up Ros" I say as she walks out the door.

As much as I hate to admit it, I know Ros is right. When I came back from Taiwan, I was much more in control of my temper and had few outbursts at work. However that quickly wore off and even the occasional session with a sub at the BDSM club didn't help. I continue to visit the club once every few months but still cannot manage to have actual intercourse or an orgasm with any of the subs. Most of the time I observe and learn more about the lifestyle, other times I have session with a sub just to try out different techniques that I saw or read about online. I cannot stop thinking about Rose; every time I am with another sub all I can think about is that they are not Rose. I have absolutely no way to find Rose, yet cannot manage to give up the notion that someday I am going to find her. A few months ago I had a private contractor install a BDSM playroom in my penthouse exactly like the playroom I was in with Rose in Taiwan. I've upgraded the quality of several of the items in the room such as the bed and linens but the colors and set up of the room are almost the exact replica of the room in Taiwan. I had hoped that I would find a sub at the club that I felt would be a good match for me and then we could meet at the penthouse for more private time. I have yet to find anyone that I would want in my personal space or to see a second time even so the room remains locked and untouched. Taylor has not asked any questions about it but I can only imagine what is going through his head.

"Christian?" Ros knocks on my door a couple hours later.

"Come in" I say without looking up from my computer screen.

"Here's another new phone" she says placing another blackberry on my desk.

"I know that's not why you came in here…"I reply.

"Seattle E Books has decided to merge with SIP" Ros says cautiously.

"WHAT? You have got to fucking be kidding me! Did you offer the 2.5?" I yell.

"Yes, Mr. Snyder said it wasn't about the money" Ros answers.

"Then what the fuck did he base his decision on? If it's not about the money, what the fuck else is there? Everything is based on money!" I say angrily.

"All he said was they received a better offer which allowed them to retain more control of the business and the proposal was more in line with their business plan" Ros says.

"That's bullshit!" I sigh.

I hate losing a deal! It's not about the company itself as I wasn't quite sure that I wanted to go in the direction of electronic publishing in the first place; it's the fact that this no name person picked up the company from right under me! I've lost deals in the past but for some reason this one is hitting harder. It's just one more example of the few things in my life I have complete control over right now. I really need to find a sub but I don't know how to stop comparing everyone to Rose. I had an appointment scheduled with my therapist, Dr. Flynn, yesterday evening but he wasn't helpful. He keeps trying to tell me I need to find another way to let out steam that BDSM isn't the answer. He says my fixation on Rose is my way of failing to recognize that BDSM is not helping me; basically saying she is just an excuse.

"Andrea! I'm going out" I say walking out of the office leaving a stunned Andrea behind.

I rarely leave the office during the day unless it's for a meeting which Andrea would obviously know in advance about. I find myself walking several blocks in no particular direction before I find a coffee shop where I decide to sit down and have a bite to eat. As I sit next to the window eating a muffin, I swear I see Rose walk by across the street. I am so convinced it's her I immediately go outside to yell to her, however standing up I knock my coffee over spilling it's hot contents all over the floor. By the time I get outside, she is gone. _It couldn't be her, could it?_ The woman I saw was petite, dressed in a black skirt with matching suit jacket with brown hair down to the middle of her back. Even from a distance she looked exactly like Rose. _Is it possible she is in Seattle? Or I am losing my mind?_


	6. Chapter 6

Many thanks for all the feedback!

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James & the Fifty Shades of Grey Trilogy._

**Chpt. 6: Ana's POV:**

The next couple of weeks have flown by despite how incredibly busy I have been. I ended up requesting Stacy fly out here a week early as I could not function without her. Luckily she is very flexible and was able to move early without much convincing. The administrative assistant with SIP was trying hard to help but she just wasn't Stacy. It was too much for one person to learn in such a short period of time and I found myself too frustrated with her to even deal with her. I knew this was more about me than it was about her which is why I asked Stacy to come earlier. At least with Stacy here there was some normalcy back in my life although I still felt like it was spinning out of control. The merger with Seattle E Books went through without a hitch; it was announced to all employees earlier this week. We have identified six or seven people within Seattle E Books that will be terminated at the end of the month; mostly because they have identical positions to those already held within SIP and those staff have more seniority. A couple are being terminated because of poor job performance over the last year or so however Mr. and Mrs. Snyder were able to recognize their poor performance and agreed with my decision.

As for SIP, I see at least one background check that is concerning; a senior editor Jack Hyde has a record including prison time more than four pages long. His record includes everything from DUIs to drug use to domestic violence. I have spoken with Mr. Roach who swears Jack Hyde is a wonderful employee who works very closely with several key authors. I make a note to watch him carefully, one step out of line I will terminate his employment without thinking twice. I have notified all employees of SIP and Seattle E Books that background checks will be ran annually on all employees as well as random drug testing.

"Hi Kate" I answer my phone.

"You've been in Seattle what two weeks and I haven't seen you yet?" Kate asks.

"I know, Kate" I sigh. "I'm sorry. It's been out of control since I arrived; I took over another company at the last minute so all my time has been spent merging the two companies into one."

"Then it sounds like Saturday is exactly what you need!" Kate exclaims.

"Saturday?" I ask confused.

"The gala I told you about? Please don't tell me you forgot!" she whines.

"No of course not….It's right here on my calendar" I say after quickly clicking on my calendar on the computer.

"Great! Do you want to go shopping for dresses tomorrow? Something tells me you don't have one yet…" Kate says.

"That sounds great and you're right I haven't had a chance to shop yet" I laugh.

"Great, come to my apartment around 3" Kate says hanging up.

"Stacy, can you come in for a moment?" I ask.

"Yes Ms. Steele?" Stacy walks into my office.

"I need to leave tomorrow at 3, please reschedule anything that is on my schedule at that time" I say.

"You have an appointment with a realtor but I can move that up earlier in the day if you want" Stacy says.

"Sure, schedule it in the morning. I may end up working from the hotel tomorrow" I reply.

"Yes Ms. Steele" Stacy exits my office.

As I'm about to leave for the evening, Stacy notifies me that the realtor has agreed to reschedule our appointment for 10am tomorrow to view three different condos that are available. I am looking forward to getting out of the hotel; there isn't anything wrong with the hotel but it just feels so temporary. I'm ready to make Seattle my home again and I think to do that I need a permanent place to live. New York never really seemed like home I think because I always wanted to return to Seattle. As I arrive back at the Heathman I decide to take a long hot bath to try to relax. My muscles are tense and my head is spinning with everything going on at the office. I close my eyes and try to relax in the tub, but I keep seeing background checks and financial ledgers in my head. Sighing heavily, I get up out of the tub and change into a pair of workout clothes. After an hour in the hotel gym I am no more relaxed now than when I was when I came back to the hotel.

I sigh frustrated and open my laptop; I know none of this is working because the only thing that seems to make me calm even temporarily is giving up complete control. Given my position in the company, I certainly cannot give up control at work. This is why BDSM is so perfect for me; I can give someone complete control in an environment that doesn't impact my career. Although I have only tried one scene since my introduction to BDSM with Taylor, I am still highly interested in the lifestyle. That session left me feeling used but in the end I still felt back in control the next day. I think it was the approach of this dom that didn't sit well with me; I've read online that sometimes a sub and a dom are not always a good fit even if their limits mesh well on paper. I sign into the New York BDSM club's website where they list other clubs around the world that they have the same high standards that they do. I make note of a two that are relatively close to me; one in Seattle and one just outside the city. I'm hesitant to go but I decide to try; I need to do something to get my life back in order. I decide to visit the club outside of Seattle hoping that there would be less of a chance that I would run into someone I might know.

I quickly dress, get a cab and make my way to the club which is already in full swing despite only opening two hours ago. I complete the initial paperwork which is minimal since they are able to access my records from the club in New York. I again pay an obscene amount of money to visit tonight however I am reassured when I sign an iron clad NDA which is required to be signed by all members and visitors. I take a yellow bracelet not sure exactly what I am interested in tonight.

Walking into the main room I can tell almost immediately that this club is not for me. While there are customers in skimpy clothing throughout the main area, there is almost an equally number of people walking around completely naked. There are quite a number of couples engaging in various scenes in the middle of the room, some involving several people. I can't tell if the private rooms are all busy or if this is how the club normally operates. I decide to add engaging in sexual acts or a scene in public to my hard limit list after seeing this club tonight. I am about to walk out the door but decide to first get a drink; I might as well get something for the ridiculous amount of money I just threw down the toilet.

"May I?" a voice asks.

I look up and find a rather heavily set man standing in front of me pointing to the chair next to me.

"Sure" I answer.

He sits down breathing heavily before ordering a drink. His face is flush, his hair is a mess and his clothes are dishelved. Either he just ran a marathon or he just came from a scene with a someone; a glance at his wrist tells me he is a dom.

"Would you like another drink?" he asks.

"No, I'm fine thank you" I answer.

"All the rooms are occupied, but there is a couch over there…how about we get more comfortable?" he asks.

"Actually I was just leaving" I stand up.

"Come on beautiful" he says. "I can make you scream like no one ever has."

"I would rather not" I say walking out.

I hail a cab and immediately return to the hotel; what a waste of a night. I can't believe the nerve of that guy to barely recover from a scene with one sub to jump into a scene with another sub. Maybe I'm asking for too much out of the lifestyle but I would hope that if I were with a dom one night he wouldn't be with another sub the same night. I don't want to feel like a tramp or a whore just because I happen to enjoy sex a little rough. Tossing and turning in bed I realize I am more stressed now than I was when I came back from the office. The club did nothing but make me feel more out of control. Perhaps the other club would have been a better choice, although I think it's going to be some time before I try another club. I finally fall asleep remembering the only two scenes that have ever left me feeling fully satisfied both sexually and psychologically.

The morning arrives quickly and I wake feeling unrested which has been pretty typical for me lately. I quickly shower, eat breakfast and respond to a few emails before setting out to meet the realtor that Stacy has lined up for me. The first condo we see is located in a high rise apartment building called the Flagstone. It has two bedrooms, two bathrooms and a small study; I think it's priced a little high for the small space but the realtor informs me the price includes various amenities most of which I know I will be too busy to enjoy. The overall condo isn't bad, but I don't think it's me. There is no balcony for one, which is important to me; I want to be able to step outside quickly and get a breath of fresh air every so often. The kitchen is also very small; although I don't have much time I enjoy cooking and would prefer a bigger place.

The second condo is closer to what I'm looking for, it's located in a building called Sky Tower and is very closer to SIP. This condo has three full bedrooms one of which would make a perfect office, two bathrooms and a decent size kitchen. There is a balcony but it is very small; as in so small I don't know if I could put more than one chair on it. The other downside is there is no washer and dryer hook up in the condo so I would need to have that done before I moved in. The realtor felt this could easily be accomplished installing the hook up in the kitchen pantry, however then I am losing the pantry which is a feature I liked about the kitchen. The price is comparable to what I would expect and the building has a nice gym.

The third condo is absolutely perfect; it's located in a building called Escala and while it's a little further than the second condo to SIP it is still within a close distance. Each apartment comes with one dedicated parking space however additional spaces could be purchased. The condo has two large bedrooms complete with walk in closets, a large study, a small room which I think would be perfect for a library, three bathrooms, two gas fireplaces and a large kitchen with upgraded appliances. The realtor explains the condo has been completely remodeled by the previous owners including top of the line appliances. There are two balconies, one off the living room and one off the master bedroom. The one of the master bedroom is very small but the second one has plenty of space for chairs and a small cocktail table. This apartment is considered a junior penthouse because of the square footage and number of rooms; there are only two on this floor with the main penthouse being one floor above it. There is full time security in the building and both penthouse floors are only accessible by code. While security has never been a concern for me, this apartment is appealing as I realize at any time I could piss off the wrong employee or business competitor. Before we leave I instruct the realtor to make an offer and if the owner accepts to request closing as soon as possible. This places feels like home and is exactly what I want.

"Ana!" Kate exclaims as I answer my phone.

"Hi Kate" I laugh…she is always so cheery.

"Are you ready to shop until we drop?" she asks.

"Of course, where should we meet?" I answer.

Kate gives me the address of a store she wants to start at which happens to be only a couple of blocks from Escala. I decide to walk to the store since the weather is beautiful today and I rarely get a chance to take a walk just to enjoy the weather. This was why I it is so important to me to have a balcony in my apartment; if nothing else at least I could step outside. I stop by a food vendor cart and grab an ice tea before continuing to the store to meet Kate. I suddenly have a weird feeling and something pulls me to look across the street. For a split second I swear I see Taylor talking on a cell phone getting out of a black SUV. I try calling for him but in the traffic of the busy street my voice is lost. Unfortunately there is no cross walk in site and I cannot safely cross this street without a light. Just as I ponder my options, the Taylor look alike enters a restaurant and disappears from site. _It's not possible; that was not Taylor. _ My mind must be playing tricks on me, I sigh.

"Ana! You look wonderful!" Kate greets me outside the store with a huge hug.

"I've missed you Kate!" I exclaim.

"Tell me what's new in your life" she says as we begin looking around the shop.

"I found an apartment today and my realtor is making an offer today" I say.

"Where at?" Kate asks.

"A building called Escala" I answer.

"Oh I've heard of it, it's very nice" Kate says.

"So what about you? What's new with you?" I ask.

"I'm still at The Times News" Kate begins. "Oh, but more importantly I think I'm in love!"

"Really?" I'm surprised; I never thought Kate would be the type to fall in love.

"Yes," she laughs. "I can't wait for you to meet Elliot tomorrow night; I know you're going to love him!"

"Oh, speaking of tomorrow night, what's the charity?" I ask realizing I know nothing about this event.

"I swear if you ever checked your email!" Kate says. "It's a ball to benefit a charity called Coping Together; they work with families with young children to support the parents who have a drug or alcohol addiction. The ball is held at Elliot's parent's house, which is the largest house I have ever seen! It's a beautiful setting and Elliot says at the end of the night they have fireworks over the water."

"You've met his parents?" I ask surprised again.

"Yup!" She smiles. "I've had lunch with his parents several times and I've met his sister Mia and brother Christian. I will introduce you to his family tomorrow at the ball."

After several hours of shopping we both finally settle on dresses, shoes and jewelry. We go back to Kate's apartment as she has insisted we have a sleepover like we used to in college. We order in pizza, drink cocktails and watch chick flicks until the wee hours of the morning. It's been so nice catching up with Kate and momentarily forgetting about my crazy world. Kate loans me a pair of pajamas since I wasn't planning on spending the night. We bring out pillows and blankets to the living room and crash on the floor with movies playing in the background. This used to be our every weekend routine before I moved to New York.

The next morning, I get up to make a pot of coffee as Kate snores away on the floor next to me. Not much has changed, I laugh to myself. I decide to start cooking breakfast which the coffee is brewing; luckily Kate has a few eggs in her fridge. She hates to cook so I'm not surprised that she has so little.

"What time is it?" Kate mumbles.

"Almost ten" I answer.

"Ugh too early" she whines.

"No, we have a ball to get ready for Cinderella!" I joke.

After breakfast Kate loans me some clothes and we head to the spa where Kate has made appointments for us to get our hair and make up done for the ball tonight. We have pedicures and manicures done as well; by the time we leave I am feeling so pampered and relaxed.

"Hello?" I answer my phone.

"Ms. Steele this is Ms. Smith from Seattle Premier Realtors" the voice on the other end responds.

"Yes Ms. Smith how are you?" I ask.

"Very well, especially since I have wonderful news for you" she answers.

"Oh?" I hold my breath.

"The sellers have accepted your offer on the condo at Escala; the closing date is two weeks from today pending the inspection report" Ms. Smith says.

"That is wonderful news! Thank you!" I hang up the phone.

"I got the apartment Kate!" I say nearly jumping up and down in her apartment.

"I assumed as much" she laughs.

We have a light lunch before getting dressed for the ball tonight. I am wearing a dark blue, off the shoulder floor length gown with silver shoes. The back of the dress tastefully drops down to my waist, snug enough to just show off the curves of my ass. A bra is not needed as one is built in since it would be nearly as impossible to wear one with the dress. I purchased a lace thong which surprisingly matches the color of the dress perfectly. I'm putting on my jewelry just as I hear Kate scream from the living room; rushing out I see her jumping to hug some guy.

"Everything okay Kate?" I say laughing.

"Ana, this is Elliot. Elliot this is Ana" she introduces.

"It's nice to meet you, I've heard a lot about you" I say shaking his hand.

"Only believe half of what she tells you; she's crazy" He laughs and then pulls me in for a hug.

Elliot escorts us both to a limo that is in front of Kate's apartment and I have to admit I am truly impressed this far with Elliot. Kate rarely goes for the nice guy; most of her past boyfriends have been real jerks to put it nicely. Elliot held open the door for us both to get into the limo and again when we arrived at his parents' house. Which Kate was right, I have never seen such a large house except in magazines. It was intimidating when we first pulled up to the house; I immediately felt like I didn't belong at an event held at such a beautiful house. Kate squeezed my hand as we were getting out of the limo and we were immediately ushered through the lines to the rear of the house where the ball was set up.

The backyard is absolutely beautiful; there is no other way to describe. There are tables set up throughout the yard, each covered in white linens and surrounded by chairs also covered with white linens. Each table has a small floral arrangement on it surrounding by softly lit candles; there is a large dance floor in the center of all the tables and a stage just to the left of it. Elliot shows us to our table which is just off the stage before him and Kate go to mingle. I find the bar, grabbing a glass of wine before I start to mingle as well. Kate was right, this is a perfect opportunity to meet various important community members I realize I am introduced to everyone from the mayor to the police chief to CEOs of banks.

"Ana, I need a favor?" Kate approaches me.

"Of course, Kate. Will you excuse me?" I ask to the gentleman I speaking with.

"Can you help me with the dance auction in a few minutes? One of Mia's friends was supposed to help out but she is plastered and can't even stand straight" Kate begs.

"Of course, come and get me when you're ready" I say before returning the discussion of financial software tracking systems with the head of a local bank.

A few minutes later I am seated at our table when Kate makes her way over to me informing me it's time for the auction. I have no idea what I agreed to, I realize as I approach the stage. As I'm standing on the stage I quickly learn what Kate signed me up for as the DJ announces each lady on stage with made up qualities and the bidding begins for a dance. All the proceeds of the auction benefit the charity so I guess I can't complain, however I would have been much happier just writing a check. Oh well, hopefully the winner of my auction will be a decent dancer.

"Next up is the lovely Kate who is an exquisite chef who just returned from Italy where she perfected her skills in bread making" the DJ says and I nearly burst out laughing. "She speaks three languages. Let's start the bidding; do I hear five hundred?"

It's no surprise Elliot wins the auction with a bid of $25,000. Kate happily meets Elliot at the side of the stage nearly jumping into his arms rather than take the steps down. I never expected to see Kate in love but watching her with Elliot, it's obvious they both care for each other deeply. I can't help the tang of jealousy I feel; I would kill for something like that but I doubt I will ever find it. I work so many hours a day when would I find the time for dating? Hell I can't even find someone to satisfy my sex life let alone love me.

"The next lovely lady here is Ana who is a world famous ballet dancer who just finished a stint on Broadway. She is also a champion swimmer and acrobat; I'm sure she will be a wonderful dancer! Let's start the bidding at five hundred?" the DJ announces as I walk to the center of the stage.

"Five hundred" a male voice in the back calls.

"One thousand" another says.

"Five thousand" says the first guy, I think. It's hard to tell on the stage and the lights are so bright you can't see anything.

"Fifteen thousand" says another.

"Thirty five thousand" says a female, causing laughter throughout the audience.

"Fifty thousand" says a stern voice.

"Seventy five thousand" says another male.

"One hundred and fifty thousand" says a loud, firm voice from the back of the audience.

"Seems we have some big spenders here tonight, any other bids for a wonderful cause?" The DJ asks pausing. "Going once, going twice….sold to the gentleman in the back. Please come collect your beautiful lady for the first dance which will begin as soon as the band is back on stage."

I walk slowly to the end of the stage in complete disbelief that someone bid so much money for me especially since I know no one other than Kate and Elliot here. As I glance around looking for the man who paid an obscene amount of money for a complete stranger, my eyes fault me and I nearly fall down in shock. I cannot believe who is walking towards me; it's can't be him…


	7. Chapter 7

Author's Note: Thank you for all the feedback! I enjoy reading every comment and seeing what you all think of the story thus far. This chapter brings the much anticipated meeting between Ana and Christian. I hope you enjoy it!

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 7: Christian's POV:**

"Yes mother, I will be there tonight" I sigh.

"And I expect you to stay behind the opening ceremony. At least stay for dinner Christian" she begs.

"I will try, but it business calls-" I begin.

"Don't give me that, Christian! There will be no work emergency tonight; it's a Saturday night and all your employees would have left for the night if they even worked today. If you leave early due to a work emergency I will have no choice but to assume you created one" she interrupts.

"I will be there" I realize I am not losing this battle.

"Try to enjoy yourself this evening Christian, it's for a good cause" she says.

"I will; see you tonight" I hang up.

I realize the charity ball tonight is for a good cause; that's why I would rather just write a check to the charity and not attend it. These events are always dull; women will basically eye fuck me and the men just want me to provide them with free business advice. Typically I spend no more than an hour at these types of events and then excuse myself saying something at the office needs my immediate attention. Clearly my mother is on to me though; I wonder if I can come up with a new excuse? Something tells me no matter what the excuse she would see right through it.

"Taylor!" I call.

"Yes sir?" Taylor enters my office moments later.

"I will be attending the charity ball tonight at my parent's house" I say.

"Yes sir, I will have the car ready for you. Will you need anything else?" he asks.

"Please have Gail get my tux ready; also please let her know I would prefer a late lunch today since dinner will be served at the ball" I direct.

"Yes sir" he walks out of my office.

I spend the rest of the afternoon reviewing the financial records for a company that Ros has suggested we look into purchasing. The financial records look fairly promising despite the obvious mismanagement of funds; they have a decent amount of revenue coming in monthly, just too much overhead and expenses. I read through the summary report Ros submitted outlining the problem areas she has identified and her recommendations for immediate corrections to bring the bottom line back into the positive.

Several hours later, Taylor and I are on our way to my parents' house. As usual, my mother has gone all out with this event and truly transformed the backyard to an elegant ball. I am always surprised at just how the yard is transformed for events like this. From the large white tents, to the dance floor to the stage everything is perfectly arranged and looks as if it belongs in a magazine. This charity is very close to my parents' hearts, they always make sure it only the best is provided for this ball. My biological mother had a significant drug problem when I was young and it eventually took her life. This charity aims to provide support to women struggling with drug addiction who also have children in the home. The charity provides therapy to the entire family in an effort to keep the family together while the mother works on her recovery. Most drug rehabilitation services are designed only for adults and do not take into consideration parents with children. Therefore parents are typically left with the choice of going to rehab and taking care of their children. If they have no family support, who will watch their child when they are in rehab? I know very little about my biological mother and have no idea if she had any desire to end her drug addiction but I fully support this charity for wanting to aid those mothers who do want to begin their recovery.

The evening starts like every other event my mother hosts; plenty of uptight people walking around kissing ass to those they want to impress. I only half listen to most of the guests tonight, trying desperately to tune them out and just get through the night until I am satisfied my mother will not be mad if I left. I hope she does not expect me to stay all evening; I think staying through dinner should be sufficient. She can't possibly expect me to stay through the fireworks, could she? Cutting me off from my thoughts the DJ announces the first dance auction is about to start. Personally I hate this part of the ball; why would you pay an obscene amount of money for a dance? I mean I get that it's all for charity, but why not just ask for donations? At least with the silent auction you end up purchasing an item or a service; this is just a dance. My mother says the dance auction brings in significant donations which is the reason she continues to conduct it every year. What do I know; event planning is definitely not my thing.

I stay towards the back of the stage area enjoying the spectacle of the DJ's attempt at auctioning off women. He is obviously making up characteristics about each girl, but I give him credit for putting some humor into the action. Elliot stands up quickly when it is his date's turn for the auction and I decide to give him a little run for his money and begin outbidding him. After a good laugh, I stop bidding and allow him to place the winning bid of $25,000 for a dance with his date for the evening. Just as I'm about to turn away, the DJ introduces the next girl up for auction and I immediately freeze. I swear the woman on the stage is Rose, although he introduces her as Ana which I suppose could be her real name if Rose was an alias. Moving closer to the stage I am convinced more than ever that the beautiful woman in front of me is Rose; she looks exactly as she did in Taiwan. I snap out of my shock, realizing that others are bidding on my Rose…wait did I just say _my_ Rose?

"Fifty thousand" I say sternly.

"Seventy-five thousand" says a male voice from across the room.

I search the crowd quickly to find the man who bid such a large amount and my eyes immediately land on an overweight middle aged man whom I know from one of the BDSM clubs. When I wasn't finding fulfillment at the one club in Seattle, I decided to try a different club. Upon walking into the club I quickly realized that the club was not for me as there were too few private rooms which resulted in couples engaging in sexual activity in the open. Despite a large fee to enter, the facility was set up in very poor taste in my opinion. I only stayed for one drink but during that time I recall seeing this same man engaging in a fairly brutal discipline scene with a very young sub in the middle of room. He seemed to be trying to impress the audience rather than focusing on his sub who was in obvious discomfort.

"One hundred and fifty thousand dollars" I call out essentially ending this auction.

As I assumed, the man across the room did not counter my bid not that it would have mattered because I would have bid much higher to keep Rose or Ana away from him. There is no way that my sweet and innocent Rose belongs with a man like him. Not after how brutal he was with the sub who barely looked of age. I realize she consented but to me he was too much into how the scene looked to others instead of focusing on the needs of his sub which is the only job he has as a dom. I personally do not see the appeal of public scenes but I know there are plenty of couples who find having an audience to be erotic.

I make my way over to the auction table so I can write the donation check for my winning dance bid. Several of the woman at the table swoon over me and compliment me at the rather large sum of money I donated for the dance. A donation of this large amount is rarely seen at an event like this, even for the silent auction items. Finally breaking away from all the fuss, I begin to walk towards the stage area to try to find Rose again. I can't see her through the crowd, but I'm sure she would have stayed near the stage area given that the band is setting up to begin the first dance song. Finally getting closer to the stage steps, I set eyes on the woman who has haunted my dreams for almost a year now. Much to my disbelief, she is talking to the man I just outbid for the dance! Rage immediate courses through me as I approach them, but decide to step back and listen to their conversation. If this is her dom, I will not interfere as it would be in bad taste for me to do so.

Conversation overheard…

"What a surprise to see you here Miss…." He says.

"Yes, as it is you" she answers, omitting her name.

"I would be honored to have a dance with you" he states.

"I don't think so, I need to find-" she begins.

"Excuse me for interrupting" I say cutting her off. "I believe we should take the dance floor for the first dance."

"Of course, please excuse me" she says, however the shock is evident in her eyes.

I take her hand and immediately feel a zap of electricity the moment our hands connect. I escort her to the middle of the dance floor and pull her close to me as the music begins. Her eyes are still wide with surprise as I'm sure she struggles to find the words which I am finding myself struggle with as well.

"Ana is it?" I ask remember the name the DJ used to introduce her.

"Yes, well…Anastasia but I prefer Ana" she says quietly.

"Christian" I introduce myself.

"I can't believe you're here" she whispers.

"I never thought I would see you again," I admitted. "I tried to find you but…"

"You couldn't find any record of Rose being at the club that night I assume?" she asks.

"Right…I had nothing else to go on" I sighed.

"I thought about finding you too," she admits quietly. "But with only an alias and only knowing that you live somewhere in the states I had nothing to go on."

"Please tell me you haven't been in Seattle the entire time, so close to me" I say.

"No, actually I just moved here a couple of weeks ago from New York" she says.

"Thank you ladies and gentleman for your participation in the first dance" the DJ says interrupting us. "If you would please find your seats, dinner is being served."

"I guess I should go" she says quietly.

"Can I talk to you after dinner?" I quickly ask, not wanting to let her out of my site but seeing as dinner is being served I don't have much of an option.

"I would like that" she smiles at me.

I walk her to her table where I am surprised to learn that she has already met my brother seeing as though his date is her best friend. I give her a gentle kiss on the cheek as she sits down which immediately causes her to blush before returning to my table. I sit down in shock; I can't believe I found her. Never in a million years would I have thought that I would have run into her tonight especially not at my parents' house.

**Same Day: Ana's POV**

"Ana, how do you know Christian?" Elliot asks as Christian leaves our table.

"We ran into each other while in Taiwan actually" I say smiling at the memory.

"What were you doing in Taiwan Ana?" Kate asks.

"Dad asked me to look into a space there that he was interested in but was unable to visit in person" I explain. "I have always wanted to go to Taiwan so I decided to make a small trip out of it and spent five days there. Two days before I left, I met Christian in a local bar."

"I remember that trip, Christian was pissed he had to go there because the owners of the shipping yard refused to deal with Ros because she is a woman" Elliot explains.

"What?!" Kate exclaims.

"It's a cultural thing, Kate. I ran into it when I was there trying to gather information for my dad too. The trip was useless for my dad since I really wasn't able to gather the information he wanted except for the geographically layout of the company" I say.

"What does your dad do Ana?" Elliot asks as we begin eating our main courses.

"He is in manufacturing and distribution. He was interested in warehouse space that he thought was in a key location however he has since decided to purchase space elsewhere" I explain.

We continue with small talk over dinner and every so often I find Christian watching me. We make eye contact and smile at each other; I think we are both still in shock that we found each other. Christian is exactly how I remembered him and doesn't look a bit different despite almost a year passing. I wasn't surprised when he said his name wasn't Taylor, as I had long ago assumed it was an alias. Never did I expect to find him again; I had pretty much given up hope that we would ever see each other. I have butterflies in my stomach as I think of the possibilities now that we have found each other. I'm getting ahead of myself though, I don't know that he even lives in this city or if he has a sub currently. If he has a sub I will not be involved with him until that relationship is terminated. When the dance auction first ended I was afraid that the overweight middle aged man from the BDSM club had placed the winning bid. I was trying to come up with an excuse to get out of the dance when Christian interrupted us seeing as though he had been the one to place the winning bid.

"May I have this dance?" Christian asks approaching me as soon as dinner is finished.

"Of course" I take his hand to stand up.

As we approach the dance floor I see Kate and Elliot whispering back and forth while staring at us. I'm sure both are dying to know more about how we met in Taiwan but there is no way I'm having that discussion with either of them.

Christian dances me around the dance floor through several songs, however we don't talk to one another. I'm not sure exactly what to say; I don't know if he felt the strong attachment to me that I felt to him. I doubt that he has thought about me as much as I have thought about him over the months. I desperately want to know if he is still involved in the lifestyle, if he has a sub or if decided the scene is not for him any longer but this is obviously not the place to have that conversation. It was obvious in Taiwan we were both knew to the lifestyle as we both had a certain amount of nervousness that was evident in our exchange those two nights. The thought of him having a sub now disgusts me; although I haven't technically had a dom since Taiwan I was involved in a scene with one.

"I know this is sudden but I would love to take you somewhere more private so we can talk" he whispers.

"I would like that very much" I reply.

"I need to tell my mother I'm leaving, will you wait for me?" He asks shyly.

"Of course, I need to let Kate know as well seeing as though I came with her and Elliot" I answer.

"Let Kate know that I will see that you get home safely" He says walking away.

"Kate?" I approach Kate and Elliot on the dance floor.

"Everyone okay Ana?" Elliot asks.

"Yes, it's fine" I answer. "Christian and I are going to leave, he will drive me back to the hotel tonight."

"Oh?" she says smiling.

"We're going to catch up Kate" I giggle knowing exactly where her mind is.

"Sure" Kate laughs and returns to her dance with Elliot.

I return to my table to crab my clutch while I wait for Christian. I can't help but wonder what he is thinking…

"May I have this dance?" a voice interrupts my thoughts.

I look up and am immediately disappointed when I see the man from the club again. I swear he must be following me tonight.

"I'm sorry, I was getting ready to leave actually" I explain.

"How about a quick dance and then I drive you home? I'm sure I could make the ride worth while for you" he smirks.

"I don't think so, now if you will excuse me" I stand up searching for Christian.

"Oh come on…we both know we would be good together" he says grabbing my wrist.

"Let go of me" I say through gritted teeth. "If you don't I will drop you to your knees so fast you won't know what hit you."

"I might enjoy it" he says smugly but let's go of my wrist.

"I wouldn't doubt it" I quickly walk away disgusted.

"There you are" Christian says from behind me as I walk towards the bar. "I went to your table but you weren't there."

"Sorry" I say downing a glass of wine. "I had some unwanted company."

"Is it the guy from earlier?" Christian says angrily.

"Yes" I answer.

"Are you with him Anastasia?" he asks bitterly.

"No!" I exclaim quickly. "I swear I have never been involved with him!"

"Good," he sighs running his fingers through his hair.

God I've missed that hair, I remember running my fingers through it the second night we were together.

"Shall we?" he asks taking my hand in his.

"Please" I follow his lead out to the driveway where a black Audi SUV is waiting.

"Ana this is my head of security and driver, Taylor. Taylor, this is Ana" he introduces us with a slight smirk on his face as I blush remembering the name.

"Ma'am" Taylor says opening the door for us.

"Would you mind if we went back to my place? I think we need privacy to talk further; I don't want to risk going somewhere public…" Christian says.

"No, that's fine. I understand" I answer.

"Taylor, to Escala" Christian directs.

"Wait! Escala? As in the apartment building?" I ask shocked.

"Yes, why?" Christian asks.

"I am in the process of purchasing a condo in that building" I laugh.

"You're kidding?" he smiles.

"No, I close in two weeks" I explain.

"What condo did you purchase?" he asks.

"The junior penthouse" I answer.

"I cannot believe it" he says. "After meeting you half way across the world I lose you; now I found you not only are you living in the same city as me but you are moving into the same building."

"What are the odds?" I laugh.

We ride in a comfortable silence to Escala where Taylor drops us off at the front entrance while he parks the car. We take the elevator to the penthouse and I am immediately taken back by the vast size of this condo. It has clearly been updated; there is beautiful marble tile floor throughout the entryway and a curved staircase is just off the foyer.

"Wow, this is amazing Christian" I say in awe.

"Thank you" he says. "Shall we go into the great room? Would you like a drink?"

"Yes please" I follow him into a very large tastefully decorated room.

Christian turns on the gas fireplace before leaving the room to get us drinks. I find myself very nervous suddenly; I don't know what he is thinking right now.

"White wine okay?" He says interrupting my thoughts.

"Yes, that's fine" I take the glass as he sits on the couch.

"So…." He begins.

"Your brother asked me how we met" I begin as his face pales. "I told him we met in a bar when we were both in Taiwan for business. I'm guessing your family doesn't know about your involvement…"

"No they don't" he says relaxing. "Thank you for not telling him the truth."

"Kate doesn't know either" I say.

"I have to ask...do you currently have a dom?" He asks suddenly.

"No" I answer. "Are you currently…do you have a…."

"No, I'm not involved with anyone and I don't have a sub" he answers realizing what I'm trying to ask.

"Good" I say under breath but seeing him smile I realize he heard me.

"Have you had many doms since Taiwan?" He asks.

"No….really only one on one occasion" I answer.

"What do you mean one occasion?" he asks.

"I visited a club in New York right before I moved here and was involved in a scene with a dom however that was the extent of it" I explain.

"I see" he says quietly.

"Can I ask the same question of you?" I ask; I'm unsure my role here and what I should be asking.

"Similar to you, I have engaged in a couple scenes with different subs in a club but never more than once" he answers.

"Oh" I say.

"Ana" he sighs. "I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since Taiwan; I don't know what it is but the brief time we spent together has formed this incredible memory with me."

"I feel the same way Christian" I say relieved. "I felt so connected to you even after that first night; I've thought about you constantly. When I went to the club in New York I was trying to find someone to recreate that closeness with."

"And did you?" he asks shyly.

"No, the opposite actually. I had one scene with a dom who was nice and all but I left feeling used once the scene was over" I admit.

"I think I was trying to find the same thing here" he says. "I kept thinking I needed to find the right sub to recreate the intensity that we shared but after two scenes with two different subs I left feeling unsatisfied."

"Can I ask you something?" I ask after a few moments of silence.

"Anything" he answers.

"Do you think the intensity and closeness we felt was because we were both so new to the lifestyle or do you think it's because we were such a good match? I've wondered about that…" I say.

"I don't think it was because we were new; I would think if that were it we would have felt at least one sided closeness to our next partners and It's obvious neither of us felt that" he answers taking my hands in his.

"True" I sigh.

"How did you know that guy?" he asks.

"What guy?" I'm confused.

"The one who was talking to you before we left" he says.

"Oh him" I say with disgust. "When I first arrived in Seattle, my life was hectic and I felt it was spinning out of control. I was desperate, I thought if I found a BDSM club and perhaps participated in a scene I would feel more in control. I had so much going on with work at the moment I couldn't risk being out of control; there was too much riding on it. I found the name of a few clubs and decided to visit one. Immediately when I entered the main room I knew it wasn't my scene; but I decided to at least have a drink before I left. That's when that guy approached me; it was obvious he had just finished a scene with someone as he was still panting and his clothing was a mess. He tried to get me to engage in a scene with him in the main room, which is when I left. I had no idea here would be here tonight."

"Club Risque?" he asks.

"Yes, you've heard of it?" I answer.

"I went there once as well, only to quickly realize it was not a place I wanted to be affiliated with. I saw that man involved in a very public scene with a very young sub that he was administering a punishment on" he explains.

"I can't say I'm surprised" I sigh.

"So you are still interested in the lifestyle?" he asks after a few moments of comfortable silence.

"Yes" I answer.

"I had a room built upstairs that is almost a perfect replica of the one from Taiwan" he says shyly.

"Really?" I say trying to hide my sudden excitement.

"Yes, I mean I've upgrade the quality of a few items like the bedding and furniture but otherwise it's pretty much the same room that we shared in Taiwan" he describes. "It's never been used."

"Wait…you have a playroom upstairs but you've never used it?" I'm shocked; if you have a room upstairs why even bother with a club I wonder.

"When I had the room installed I thought I would find a sub that I was compatible with at the club and then discuss a more private arrangement where our scenes would occur here. I don't like the risk of being scene in a club by someone that I might run into in work" he explains.

"I understand" I say. "I've had those same fears. It was why I chose Club Risque; it was outside of Seattle so I figured my chances of running into someone I would do business with would be minimal."

"I don't know where you're at right now…." he pauses. "I would very much like to show you the room upstairs and perhaps…"

"I would like that very much" I interrupt.

"We should probably exchange limits first; I have updated mine since Taiwan and I'm sure you have as well" he says.

"Yes. I have a secure thumb drive with me; my list is on there if I could use a computer to print it?" I ask.

"Of course, I also have a NDA form on my computer that perhaps we both can sign?" he asks.

"That's fine" I walk into a very large office; probably as large as the master bedroom in the condo I'm buying.

I quickly sit behind his enormous desk as he fires up his computer. His office is tastefully decorated with various pieces of artwork on the walls and another gas fireplace. His desk is covered in files and paperwork, clearly showing that he was working on something today. His shelves are filled with several business books and I make a mental note to ask him later what he does for a living. I quickly locate my file and print out the list of limits as Christian hits a button on the computer and prints his list. We both sign NDAs and exchange lists.

"Ana?" he asks looking confused as he reads my list.

"Yes?" I hold my breath fearing that I may have adapted my limit list too much and perhaps we are no longer as compatible as we once were.

"You have listed sexual intercourse as a hard limit?" he asks quietly.

"Oh, that" I laugh and blush deeply. "It took me a really long time to get up the courage to finally engage in a scene with another dom after our time together in Taiwan. Although I very much wanted a scene, to give up complete control to someone again, I couldn't stomach the thought of having sex with a stranger. I thought that perhaps if the scene went well and I felt a connection then I would remove it from my hard limit but I never felt the connect and never tried another scene."

"But it's no longer a hard limit?" he asks shyly and doesn't make eye contact me.

"No, it's not-not with you" I blush again realizing what he's asking.

"I'm glad to hear that" he lets out a breath.

"I think we've both added a couple items that are the same" I say reading his list of limits. "Both of us added scenes in public along with public humiliation as hard limits."

"Yes, I imagine we both added it after our visit to Club Risque?" he asks.

"I was really turned off by the amount of activity going on in that room" I admit.

"Do you agree that our limits are still compatible?" he asks after a few moments.

"Yes" I say nervously.

"Would you like to join me upstairs?" he asks without making eye contact.

"Yes" I take a deep breath and follow him upstairs.


	8. Chapter 8

Author's Note: Sorry for the delay in posting! Life got in the way towards the end of last week plus I was away for the weekend! I hope this long chapter makes up for it! Reviews and feedback always appreciated!

* * *

**Chpt. 8: Christian's POV**

As I lead Ana up the stairs, I am still in complete shock that she is here. I have dreamed about this moment for months now but never thought I would have her in my playroom. This room was specifically designed with her in mind. There are no canes in the room; those were a hard limit for her in Taiwan and honestly I don't know that I could ever use them on her or any woman for that matter. I've seen the damage canes can do to a body if used incorrectly when I was researching BDSM on the internet and I knew at that moment that I could never use a cane in a scene. While there is a certain degree of punishment that is expected in BDSM I would never want to leave bruises to the extent that the cane does or break bones which can easily occur with a cane.

I take a deep breath and pause briefly before unlocking the door to my playroom. No one has ever been in this room except Gail who dusts the room every couple of weeks. Telling her and Taylor about this room was nerve wrecking to say the least. I normally could care less what others think of me and in the office I am always confident in what I do. However when it came time to have Taylor find someone to build this room, I was nervous as hell. Of course, Taylor being the military man that he is showed absolutely no emotion and I could not tell what he was thinking. He immediately found a contractor to build the room and several companies in which I could order supplies through discretely. He insured everyone signed an NDA and had them fully vetted before they would do any work for me. Gail took the news of the room better than I expected, however I believe that is in part because Taylor likely gave her the heads up before I met with her to discuss it. Her only question was to insure that each woman had fully consented to the acts that would occur in the room. I had an in-depth conversation with her where we discussed consent and safe words. After that she had no questions and we have never spoken about this room again.

"If you don't like anything in this room, Ana please let me know" I say opening the door and stepping aside to let her in.

She slowly enters the room and pauses. Her eyes are glued to the floor, her head down and her legs slightly apart. It's only then do I realize that she went into full sub mode the moment we walked through the door. I am pleased by this, but I need to know what she thinks of the room before we can begin a scene. If she doesn't like something in the room, I will immediately remove the item. I want her to be completely comfortable in this room and for her to feel safe with me in here.

"Ana, before we start I would like to speak to you freely" I say.

"Yes sir" she says looking up from the floor.

"I want you to take a few minutes and look around the room; let me know if anything in here bothers you or makes you feel uncomfortable. Please be honest" I reply.

Ana slowly looks around the room, taking it all in for the first time. She slowly walks over to bed, taking note of the hard carved wooden posts and feeling the silk sheets. She walks over to the chest of drawers, opening the first couple before closing them and not looking through the others. I can't see her face to know what she is thinking but she just continues walking around the room taking everything in. After what feels like an hour, but likely was only a matter of a few minutes, she walks back over to me.

"What did you think Ana?" I ask.

"You really made this room a piece of art Christian" she says smiling. "The detail on the woodwork on the bed and the cross is exquisite; the abstract art work on the walls is very tastefully done as well. This reminds me a lot of the room we had in Taiwan but with subtle upgrades."

"Is there anything that makes you uncomfortable in here? You seemed a little hesitant when you opened the drawers in the chest. Is there something in there that you don't like?" I ask nervously.

"No, it's not that" she blushes.

"What is it?" I ask quickly. "I want you to be comfortable in here; if you don't like something I will get rid of it right now."

"No…I…." she stutters before taking a deep breath. "I didn't need to look in the rest of those drawers because that few that I did look in were filled with many items I'm just not familiar with. I had told you in Taiwan I only had one sexual partner before you….when we had sex it was just straight sex. We never used any…toys…so I don't know what most of those things are in the drawer. I mean, I researched a lot online about BDSM but I didn't really focus on the toys and equipment too much. I've seen several of those items before in pictures or when I would observe a scene, but I can't say yet if I would enjoy them."

"Oh, I see" I sigh in relief. "We will go slow, and if you discover anything you don't like we won't use it again."

"Thank you" she blushes again and looks at the floor.

I lift her chin up so her eyes find mine again; I am instantly taken back to Taiwan with just the look of her eyes again. I reach down and kiss her gently on the lips as I pull her closer to me. It's been so long since I've felt her lips against mine, her body close to mine; I can feel myself immediately responding to her. The kiss quickly becomes passionate and the hunger we both have is evident. Her hands are entangled in my hair, pulling me closer to her as my hands find her ass and pull her into me closer. She moans into my mouth and I take this opportunity to let my tongue explore her mouth further. My hands are all over her; the feel of her back, her hips, her thighs is becoming too much and I know I need to have her soon or there will be no playtime for either of us. I pull away from her quickly, leaving us both panting heavily. Her eyes immediately fall to the floor, obviously realizing the scene has begun. I walk over to the chest of drawers and gather a few items that I desperately want to use with her tonight. Honestly, I don't know that we will get to use everything but now that I have her here I want to try as much as I can. If tonight goes well, I hope to make this a more permanent arrangement; perhaps we can discuss setting certain days each week aside to visit my playroom.

I step behind her and gently tug the zipper of her beautiful dress down, before pulling it off her shoulders so it collects on the floor. I nearly gasp when I see that she is not wearing a bra under the dress; I can't help myself and I immediately reach around to fondle her bare breasts as I kiss her neck. She moans quietly as I pinch her hard nipples between my fingers and grind my erection against her firm ass. The thong she is wearing matches the color of her dress almost perfectly; my hand slowly makes it's way from her breast, down her stomach to her pelvis before settling on her sex which is emanating heat. I rub her clit through the lace thong and I am rewarded when she pushes her ass further against my erection and rests her head on my shoulder. I pull away causing her to moan disappointment. I bring her arms behind her back and immobilize them with a cable tie.

I step in front of her and admire her beautiful body as her eyes remain glued to the floor. Her arms restrained behind her back causes her breasts to stick out further; I can't help myself and immediately take them both in my hands. I roll her nipples between my fingers, alternating between pinching and rubbing them. Her breathing is heavy and I can tell she is holding herself back from moaning loudly as her body increases with excitement. I take one of her nipples in my mouth, sucking on it gently as I push her underwear down so they fall to her ankles. My hand finds her sex again, and I am pleased to see that she is drenched with excitement. I run my finger through her folds, coating it in her juices before I fall to my knees and assist her in stepping out of her dress and underwear. Once her clothing is tossed aside, my mouth latches onto her sex devouring her. God, I have missed her sent, her taste and her body. I grab her ass and pull her closer to my mouth; with her arms restrained there is nothing she can do but enjoy my actions. I suck on her clit, causing her to gasp loudly and moan. Just as I can feel her body getting close to its peak I pull away from her sex causing her to moan in disappointment. When she comes for the first time tonight, I want it to be around my dick when I'm deep inside of her. I want her to come so hard she will be thinking about it for weeks.

I take off my clothing; we are now both naked and it's taking everything in me to not bend her over and take her right now. It's been so long since I've had a release by something other than my own hand while thinking about the club in Taiwan.

"On your knees" I order.

She gracefully drops to her knees, which is not an easy task to accomplish with her hands behind her back but she manages. I step closer to her and without proving a directive, she immediately takes me deep into her mouth. I close my eyes and savor the feel of her soft lips around my dick, her tongue running up and down me, the feel of her throat as I reach the back of it. I hold her head gently, guiding her to take me deeper as she struggles not to gag. After a few moments, I realize that if she doesn't stop I am going to come in her mouth. I want to come inside of her when I come for the first time tonight; to feel her walls clutching me tightly as I pour myself into her.

"That's enough" I gently pull her up against me taking her mouth into mine again.

As I devour her mouth, I pull her against me closely so my erection poking her abdomen. She parts her legs slight as I reach down and position myself just at her folds. I rock her ass back and forth as she grinds against my erection which is now coated in her juices. I pinch her nipples while sucking on her bottom lip hard as she moans loudly.

"Do you want me?" I briefly pause my attack on her mouth.

"Oh God yes" she answers breathless.

"Tell me" I order.

"God I want you so bad Christian" she moans. "My body is on fire, I'm so hot for you."

"And only me" I say pinching her nipple hard.

"Ah!" she gasps. "Yes, only you. There's never been anyone else."

"No one else has been inside of you?" I ask surprised. I knew she listed sexual intercourse as a hard limit but I assumed she at least tried regular sex since Taiwan.

"No, not since we were together" she sighs rubbing herself against me further. "Please Christian…I need you."

"I haven't been with anyone else since you Ana; I couldn't…." I stutter not wanting to admit I couldn't maintain an erection with anyone since her.

With that admission, she attacks my mouth hungrily; nipping at my lips, sucking on my tongue while grinding her wet folds against my erection. I need to have her; as much as I wanted more play time with her I don't think I can last much longer. I need to be inside of her again; she was so tight last time she gripped me as if she never wanted me to leave. I guide her over to the bed, bending her over so her chest rests against the mattress as I spread her legs gently. I bend down, kissing and sucking on her legs causing her to moan as I ignore her clit. As I reach further up on her leg I can see her juices coating her thighs and her moans are becoming louder with desire. I slowly drag my finger between her folds before gently pushing it inside of her causing her to gasp. I stand up behind her, gently adding a second finger into her. Even with just two fingers inside of her I can tell she is just as tight as I remember her being; she is gripping me so tight I can only imagine how it's going to feel to be inside of her.

"Christian….please…" she begs.

"Almost baby" I say. "I need to get a condom."

"I'm still on the pill Christian" she says. "I'm clean, I had a physical two months ago."

"Are you sure?" I ask; the thought of being inside of her again without a barrier is nearly my undoing.

"Christian, please I want to feel you" she blushes.

"I'm clean; I had all the blood work done a couple weeks ago… I can show you…." I say.

"I trust you Christian" she says grinding herself against my hand which is now soaked with her juices.

"This is going to be hard and fast" I pull my fingers from her and push my erection between her legs. "I don't know how long I'm going to last once I get inside of you."

"Please…." She begs breathlessly.

I position myself at her opening, and gently push into her as I am immediately reminded that no one else has been inside of her since me given how tight she is. I'm not even half way inside of her and I'm so close to letting go. Her walls are gripping me tightly, her body is tense likely with some discomfort as try to push into her deeper. I reach around applying gently pressure to her clit, alternating between rubbing it and pinching it as I feel her body start to relax.

"OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" She screams as I slam into her fully.

She is just as tight as I remember; I pause and let her body get accustomed to me once again.

"Are you okay?" I ask after a few moments.

"Yes, I'm good" she answers tensely, but pushes herself back and forth against my erection.

I let her set the pace initially, savoring the feeling of her surrounding me and gripping me. I take hold of her hips and begin fucking her hard and fast like I said. I know I won't last long at all at this pace.

"Don't come until I say so" I order, entering her forcefully hitting her g spot perfectly.

"AH! Please sir!" she exclaims.

"Not yet…hold it" I command, pulling all the way out and slamming into her.

"Ah!" she yells.

I keep up this pace for several minutes; I can tell she is on the brink of not being able to hold her orgasm much longer. She is gripping me to tight, I struggle to pull out of her each time.

"Oh God!" She yells as I pinch her clit harshly.

"Come Ana!" I yell as I pull out on final time before slamming back into her finding my release just as she finds hers.

We stand like that for several minutes, as I gently rock back and forth inside of her allowing us both to ride out our orgasms. I don't want to pull out of her but I know this position can't be comfortable for her legs if I continue to have her standing here much longer. I slowly pull out of her causing her to moan in disappointment.

"I will be right back" I whisper into her ear before kissing her check.

I quickly make my way to the bathroom, grabbing a warm washcloth before returning to the playroom to find a pair of scissors. I gently snip the cable ties from her wrist and pick her up to place her on the bed. I rub her wrists gently trying to get rid of the light red marks the cable ties left on her. I clean her up before returning to the bathroom to clean myself up. When I return to the room, I find that she is sound asleep laying on her side on the bed that no one has ever as much as sat on before. I can't help but smile as I climb into the bed and lay next to her. This is not how I imagined my night would end when I arrived at the charity ball earlier this evening but I wouldn't want it any other way. After all this time I have finally found my Rose; well my Ana, the one who has haunted my dreams for the last year. The connection I felt so long ago with her is still here; I wonder if she felt it as well?

**Ana's POV:**

I wake up confused for a few minutes before I remember where I am. God I couldn't believe how wonderful Christian was with me last night; never did I feel used like when I was with the dom at the club that one time. The connection I felt to Christian was still there; even after all this time. I felt like he could read my body perfectly; he knew exactly what I needed even when I didn't. I thought he was crazy for working me up so many times last night only to tell me not to come; but my God when he finally let me come it was wonderful. Just remembering about it as me getting wet down there again; Christian is sleeping beside me holding me close to him as I feel his body against mine. As I gently move my ass closer to him, I can tell he is sleeping completely naked next to me. I can also tell that he would likely be agreeable to round two if I could wake him right now. Hmmmmm….as a sub I'm supposed to let him take control and set scenes as he deems needed but we technically didn't establish any rules yet. I decide to take the chance and gently turn over so I am facing him. He seems to be sound asleep; I push him onto his back which causes him to groan but he continues to sleep soundly. I duck under the blankets, climb on top of his legs and take his erection into my mouth. Immediately I hear him gasp in surprise, but he says nothing and allows me to continue sucking him deep. I alternate between sucking his head, fondling his balls and every so often taking him deep so he hits the back of my throat. Taking him deep is difficult because he is so big; I often find myself gagging even though I try to relax my throat muscles.

"You're a bad girl Ana" he moans as he places a hand on my head guiding me to take him deeper again.

"Hmmmmmmmmmm" I reply just as he hits the back of my throat again.

"Swallow me" he orders holding my head in place.

I struggle but manage to comply with his order and swallow around him which allows him to go just a little deeper down my throat. He pulls my head back and allows me to suck on his head, before pulling me closer to him so he once again is against my throat.

"Again" he orders.

Again, I struggle but comply. This time he stays there longer and I'm getting close to panicking.

"Breath through your nose, you're fine" he says gently but doesn't move my head.

I force myself to relax and breathe through my nose as he directs which much to my surprise allows me to relax further around him. He stays deep inside my throat for what feels like several minutes, before pulling my head back and allowing me to suck just on his head. Once again, after a few seconds he pulls me against him closer pushing himself against the back of my throat. I immediately swallow understanding this is a technique he seems to enjoy and am rewarded with a loud moan from him.

"Don't stop" he says as he quickly moves my head up and down on his erection. Each time he pulls me down, I take him in deep and suck him harder.

"Oh Ana!" he yells as he empties himself as he is deep in my mouth.

I struggle but manage to swallow it all while he is remains at the back of my throat; his hand holding me in place as he rides out his orgasm. I feel him becoming soft in my mouth, but I continue sucking him as I have not been told to stop. He takes his hand off of my head and pulls me up so I am lying next to him. He grabs my wrists and pulls them above my head before kissing me passionately. He rolls himself on top of me with one hand firm around my wrists.

"You're a very bad girl Ana" he breaks our kiss.

"Yes sir, I'm sorry sir" I say.

"Who is supposed to decide when a sexual act occurs?" he asks sternly.

"You are sir" I answer quietly, knowing I'm in trouble now.

"I think you should be punished for trying to top from the bottom, don't you?" he asks.

"If you think it is needed sir" I defer to him.

"Do you have plans?" he asks.

"Nothing immediate; a few things I need to review for work sir" I answer.

"Very well" he sounds pleased. "Since you took it upon yourself to decide when a sexual act would occur, your punishment is going to test your orgasm control."

"Yes sir" I gulp.

"Get up and follow me" he orders and I immediately comply.

He takes me by the hand and leads me over to the chest of drawers on the other side of the room. I am beyond nervous and have to remind myself that this is part of being a sub; I wanted to give up complete control which is what I should have been doing instead of seeking out pleasure this morning. He pushes on my back encouraging me to bend over as he gently pushes my legs apart. He runs his fingers over my sex as I struggle to hold in a moan.

"You're wet" he whispers.

"Yes sir" I answer.

"Did you wake up wet?" he asks.

"Yes sir" I blush.

"Why?" he asks.

"Why?" I repeat.

"Tell me what you were thinking about that made you wet this morning" he orders.

"I….last night….I had never came so hard" I stutter.

"Ah, and you were remembering that?" he smirks.

"Yes sir" I blush deeply just as he pushes a finger inside of me.

I hear him fumbling with the drawers as he continues to finger fuck me; I am confused because he told me my punishment was about orgasm control but he is quickly bringing me to the peak. Just then, I feel him remove his finger as he pushes an item inside of me. Just as quickly, I feel him push another item inside of me and I realize he is using the balls that we used in Taiwan. It's at that point I realize I am in trouble…every time you move with these things in they hit your g spot.

"Stand up" he orders pulling me up by the waist and turning him to face him. "You are going to wear these for some time this morning. Every time you move you will be reminded that you are not in control; if you come before I allow you the punishment will be longer. Understood?"

"Yes sir" I gulp.

He grabs my face and kisses me passionately which turns me on even more.

"God I've missed you" he whispers into my ear.

"Me too" I moan.

"Let's go down to the kitchen; I would like you to make me breakfast" he says.

"Yes sir" I answer.

"We should probably have clothes for you to wear though; I wouldn't want Taylor seeing you" he smirks.

"Yes sir" I blush.

Christian leaves the room and returns quickly with a pair of his boxer briefs and a long t shirt. I don't have a bra to wear since I didn't wear one with my dress last night so I am forced to go without one. Christian takes my hand and leads me downstairs to the kitchen; by the time we reach the breakfast bar I am breathless and trying very hard to think of anything but the balls inside of me hitting my g spot with every move.

"Pancakes okay sir?" I ask.

"Yes, that's fine" he answers. "I'm going to my office to check my emails, I will be back in a few moments. Please feel free to look through the cabinets to find what you need, I'm really not sure where my housekeeper stores everything."

"Yes sir" I reply as he walks out of the kitchen.

I begin searching the cabinets, pulling out several items to put on the counter for the pancakes. In the fridge I am pleased to find fresh blueberries, so I decide to add them to the pancakes. I also find coffee and decide to make Christian a cup even though I don't drink coffee. I find the pans as well and set out to mix up the pancakes. I am just adding the batter to the frying pan when I hear a door shut behind me.

"Oh, I'm sorry Miss I didn't realize anyone was in the kitchen" a blond woman in her mid-thirties says clearly startled to find me in the kitchen.

"I'm sorry" I dry my hands on the towel. "I'm Ana."

"Gail, Mr. Grey's housekeeper and personal cook" she says shaking my hand.

"It's nice to meet you" I say embarrassed at my attire which makes it obvious to her that we had sex last night.

"Good Morning Gail" Christian says walking into the kitchen. "I see you have met Ana."

"Yes Mr. Grey, I was just coming out to start breakfast" Gail replies.

"That's okay Gail, as you can see Ana has it covered. Please take the remainder of the day off" he says smiling.

"Yes Mr. Grey. If you need anything please let me know" she leaves the room.

"Breakfast smells wonderful Ana" Christian says coming up behind me and pulling me close to him immediately causing the balls to roll against my g spot again.

"It's just about done" I say blushing.

We sit in silence as we eat our breakfast; Christian drinks his coffee as I drink a cup of tea. I clear the plates and load the dishwasher which is not an easy task as each time I bend down the balls move inside of me again. Just as I'm finishing, Christian comes up behind me and pulls me close to him pinching my nipples harshly.

"Hmmmmmmmmm" I moan as the feeling is beginning to overwhelm me.

"Don't come" he whispers into me ear as he reaches down the boxer briefs and rubs my clit.

"Please sir" I beg; I'm on the edge and don't know how much longer I can last.

"No!" he exclaims smacking my ass hard. "This will help you remember who is in charge."

"Yes sir" I sigh.

As much as I hate to admit it, he is right. The reason I am a sub is because I want someone to take control and the bedroom is the only place I can afford to give up control. I suppose I tried to top from the bottom this morning like he said; I was trying to take control and get him to give me what I wanted. We spend the next couple of hours in the great room; me on my phone answering various emails and him on his laptop working. It's a comfortable silence between us and is not awkward that we are both working on a weekend. I realize how little I know about him, but what I do know about him is that we are a perfect match together.

"Ana?" Christian closes his laptop.

"Yes sir?" I answer.

"Go to the playroom, take all your clothes off and fold them leaving them on the table. I will be up shortly" he directs.

"Yes sir" I immediately stand and make my way to the stairs.

Climbing the stairs is more difficult than I would have thought; each step I take jostles the balls around inside of me more than just walking does. By the time I reach the playroom, I am breathless and my face is flushed a deep read. I quickly realize the playroom door is locked; I am forced to return to the great room to retrieve the key from Christian. Taking a deep breath, I slowly walk down the steps as the balls continue to roll around inside of me.

"Is there a problem?" he smirks as I enter the room.

"The room is locked sir" I reply.

"Oh, I must have forgotten" he smiles giving me the key.

By the time I reach the playroom again I am on the brink of an orgasm; the slightest touch would send me over the edge right now. I remove my clothing, folding it and placing it on the table as Christian directed before kneeling on the floor in the standard sub position. I try to control my breathing and calm my body before Christian walks in. Luckily he waits several minutes before entering the room which gives me just enough time to regain control so I am not as close to the edge any longer. I am focused on the floor but I hear him go over to the chest of drawers before returning to me.

"Stand up" Christian orders, to which I immediately comply.

Without warning Christian begins sucking hard on my nipple while pinching the other one which immediately causes a gush of fluid to coat my thighs and the intense desire to immediately return. He places small nipple clamps on both of my nipples simultaneously.

"AHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream out.

"You have not been given permission to come yet" he reminds me.

He attaches a chain to both clamps and just like in Taiwan, he leads around the room by the chain. This time it's not on the pressure on my nipples but the constant movement of the balls that are still deep inside of me. By the time we make our way around the room, I am on the edge and doubt that I can wait much longer. I try thinking about everything going on at work and the various projects I have in the works just to calm my body down as he leads me over to the leather spanking bench. He gently pushes down on my back so I am bent against the bench; the added pressure to my nipples in this position is not helping my body relax.

"I am going to spank you five times; you will count" He directs.

"Yes sir" I say nervously.

"Do you remember the safe words we agreed to in Taiwan?" he pauses.

"Yes sir, yellow and red" I answer.

"Very good; use them if needed" he says. "Do not come; when I am finished spanking you I will see about rewarding you."

"Yes sir" I reply.

He walks over to the side of the room briefly before returning to me. He puts an item on the table which is just far enough away to be out of view. He attaches my hands to the cuffs at the bottom of the bench before returning behind me. He rubs my ass slowly before dragging a finger through my wet folds which immediately brings the desire back replacing the nervousness of the punishment.

"ONE!" I scream as the belt bites my skin.

I was not expecting a belt, but I can honestly say it's not nearly as bad as I would have expected. I don't think he is hitting me at full force. By the time I get to the third hit, I am torn. My ass is on fire from the belt but each time he hits me the balls hit my g spot and my orgasm gets closer. I have never been hit with a belt before but the combination of all the feelings is sending me into overload.

"FIVE!" I yell as the last belt comes down a little harder than the others onto my ass.

"Who is in charge Ana?" he yells.

"You are sir" I answer promptly.

"Who decides when you come?" He asks.

"You do sir" I answer.

"Who do you belong to?" He asks rubbing his fingers along my clit.

"You Christian, only you" I sob as I'm on edge yet again today.

He continues to apply pressure on my clit as his fingers rub against my sex just at my opening, but careful to never enter me. I can feel his fingers are coated in my juices as he continues to drive me closer to the edge.

"Don't come" he reminds me again just before reaching in and yanking the balls out of me.

"Ah!" I scream; the feeling is intense and I'm so close from being denied an orgasm so many times today and being kept on edge with the damn balls inside of me.

I hear Christian taking off his clothes and I take a deep breath trying to calm myself down. If he is removing his clothes that has to mean this punishment is close to ending, right? I feel his fingers on my sex again, one slowly enters me as he rubs me back and forth keeping me right on the edge. I bite my tongue, preventing me from begging for the orgasm that I so need right now. He removes his finger and I feel his erection at my entrance; he slowly pushes himself inside of me. When it feels like he is almost inside of me I feel his finger rubbing my anus and I immediately tense up. I've never had anal play and can't say I ever had a desire for it. He continues just rubbing the area as his erection slowly moves in and out of me. My body is forced to relax as Christian begins moving harder and faster, hitting my g spot each time. I'm already very sensitive from being denied so many orgasms today that I don't think I can last much longer.

"OHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I exclaim as he slams into me hard.

"Do you want to come?" he asks, pushing in deeper while rubbing his finger around my anus.

"Please sir….if you want me to…sir" I answer breathless.

"Soon, Ana, soon" He says.

"AHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream out as he pushes the tip of his finger inside of me.

"Push back Ana and relax" he says calmly but doesn't remove his finger.

I try to do as he says; I take a deep breath and push back against the foreign object invading my virgin ass for the first time. To my surprise pushing back allows him greater access and he pushes his finger in all the way swiftly. He doesn't move his finger as he pulls out of me and slams back into me hitting my g spot over and over again.

"Come Ana" he says moving his finger in and out of my ass as his slams back into me deep and hard.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH CHRISTIAN!" I yell as the biggest orgasm of my life hits me hard.

He doesn't let up; he continues his assault on both of my holes as another orgasm quickly builds despite the first one not really ending. I quickly find myself on the edge again; the feeling of having both holes penetrated is overwhelming. I feel so full, my nipples ache from the leather bench, my clit is hitting the edge of the bench every time Christian slams into me.

"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream.

"Come with me Ana!" He yells; as I explode around him I feel him empty himself inside of me.

He gently removes himself from me, unhooks the cuffs and carries me to the bed where he gently removes the nipple clamps.

"UUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I say in discomfort at the sudden rush of blood back to them.

Christian gently sucks on each nipple for a few moments easing the pain from having the clamps on for so long.

"Are you okay?" Christian asks.

"Yes, I'm fine" I answer.

"Are you sure?" his eyes full of concern.

"Yes, I'm sure Christian" I answer leaning up and kissing him.

"Would you want to do this again?" he asks shyly.

"Yes" I blush.

"Perhaps every weekend?" he smiles.

"That shouldn't be a problem as long as I don't have to travel for work" I answer.

"I might have to travel as well so if that occurs we can arrange something else maybe for during the week" he suggests.

"Speaking of work" I sigh. "I should probably head back to the hotel as I have a few things to take care of before tomorrow."

"Of course," he looks disappointed.

"Until next weekend?" I ask.

"Looking forward to it" he answers. "Oh, I had Neman Marcus send over some clothes for you to wear home; they are in the bathroom."

"Thank you Christian; I was dreading returning to the hotel in my gown from last night" I giggle.

"Why don't you meet me downstairs and I will get you a copy of the NDA that we both signed last night before I drive you back to the hotel?" Christian suggests.

"Sure, I'll be down in a few minutes" I enter the bathroom as Christian leaves the room.

On the vanity is a small back from Neman Marcus containing jeans, a blue shirt, a black bra, black lace underwear, socks and a pair of sneakers all in perfect size. I'm shocked that Christian knew my size perfectly but then again most of what he does surprises me. How he knows what I need, when I need it continues to amaze me. He clearly is a natural dom even if he hasn't been in the lifestyle for very long. For someone who has such little sexual experience he certainly knows how to please a woman! I gather my dress and undergarments placing them into the bag before going downstairs where I am surprised to see Taylor standing in the foyer.

"Ma'am, Mr. Grey has asked me to drive you back to the hotel" Taylor states as I reach the bottom of the steps.

"Oh, of course" I say surprised; I could have sworn Christian said he would be driving me home.

"He asked me to give you this" Taylor hands me a sealed envelope as we ride the elevator to the parking garage.

I peak inside and see the signed copy of the NDA that we both signed last night. The front of the envelope has "Anastasia Steele" handwritten on it.


	9. Chapter 9

Author's Note: Thank you again for your wonderful feedback! I can't believe we have passed 100 reviews! If you have not already done so, please check out my other story _Independence_ which is another Fifty Shades fan fic.

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 9: Christian's POV: **

"Why don't you meet me downstairs and I will get you a copy of the NDA that we both signed last night before I drive you back to the hotel?" I suggest.

"Sure I'll be down in a few minutes" Ana says closing the door behind her.

I walk down to my office in a complete state of bliss; last night and this morning with Ana was perfect. Even though she tried to top from the bottom this morning, I still believe we are a perfect match. Unlike the other times when I had a scene with a sub at a club, I had absolutely no problems maintaining an erection with Ana. Hell, the moment I saw her at the ball last night I was hard. Being able to touch her, play with her and be inside of her without a barrier just made the night that much more perfect. My mind is racing with all the scenes I want to have with her now that she has agreed to spending every weekend with me. When I designed the playroom upstairs, this was the exact arrangement at I had in mind. I didn't want to have to continue to visit clubs as each time I went the risk of being recognized increased. I had hoped to find someone at the club and have a private arrangement with them with weekends being spent at my place. I even have a spare bedroom not far from the playroom that I planned to use for a sub on the weekends. I'm torn now with Ana though, I loved sleeping with her last night. I have never slept with a woman before; I was always afraid my nightmares would wake her up and then I would have to explain everything to her. But sleeping with Ana last night just felt so natural and for the first time in a long time I didn't have any nightmares.

Reaching my desk, I find the NDA that we both signed last night and quickly make a copy of it for Ana putting it into an envelope. I take the original NDA and review it so I can make a file specifically for Ana. I quickly realize that I know very little about Ana; hell I don't even know her last name! I quickly find her signature at the bottom of the NDA under which her name is printed ANASTASIA STEELE. My heart sinks….this has to be some kind of a fucking joke. This cannot be the same Anastasia Steele who stole Seattle E-Books out from underneath me!

"Taylor!" I call angrily.

"Yes sir?" Taylor asks quickly appearing at my office door.

"I need you to take Ana back to the Heathman Hotel; she should be down shortly" I instruct.

"Yes sir" Taylor says.

"Oh and give her this" I say handing him the envelope after I write her name on it.

I'm beyond furious….I can't even think of what this means. I felt so connected to Ana in Taiwan and was then lost without her for the past year. Finding her last night was like nothing I ever expected; we immediately reconnected and it was as if no time was lost between us. I don't know what the connection is, but I feel so strongly about her. I even told her that she was mine! I pour myself a large glass of bourbon and down it quickly contemplating what I'm going to do now. For a brief moment I consider whether or not this could have been intentional ; could Ana have purposely sought me out? But I quickly remember that there is no way that she could have known who I was when we met in Taiwan. If this wasn't intentional, where do we go from here? We're not exactly business rivals since her focus seems to be purely on the publishing industry and this was a new area that I was trying to venture into. How would we handle it if another company came along that we were both trying to purchase?

"Sir?" Taylor interrupts my thoughts.

"Yes Taylor?" I ask.

"Ms. Steele has arrived back at the Heathman" Taylor answers.

"Very good" I say.

"Are you ready to leave sir?" Taylor asks.

"For what?" I'm confused.

"You have an appointment with Dr. Flynn in fifteen minutes sir" he reminds me.

"Shit! Let me get washed up and we will leave" I rise from my desk to head to my room.

I quickly shower and change into a pair of jeans and a button down shirt before meeting Taylor in the foyer. I have been seeing Dr. Flynn for several years now trying to focus on reducing my nightmares and getting better control on my anger. Since my trip to Taiwan, I have spent many sessions talking about Rose or my difficulties with a sub in a scene at a club. As much as Dr. Flynn doesn't think BDSM is the answer I give him credit for keeping an open mind and not trying to talk me out of trying the lifestyle.

"Good Afternoon Christian" Dr. Flynn says as I walk into his office.

"Flynn" I take a seat across from him.

"Where would you like to start today?" he asks.

"I found Rose" I begin.

"Wait" he interrupts. "The Rose from Taiwan?"

"Yes" I sigh. "Her real name is Ana, we ran into each other at my mother's charity ball last night."

"And?" He prompts.

"We went back to my place last night and hit it off. We picked up almost exactly where we left off in Taiwan; we connected immediately again. Everything was perfect" I answer.

"Was?" he asks.

"We spent the night together-" I begin.

"As in the same bed?" he interrupts.

"Yes" I sigh. "I didn't plan it, but we fell asleep after a scene in the playroom. I slept peacefully; I didn't have a single nightmare. We spent most of the morning together as well and it was just as perfect as it was last night. She even agreed that she would like to spend more time with me; we agreed to see each other on the weekends for some time in my playroom. Then it was time for her to leave…"

"Christian?" Dr. Flynn asks after I pause for several minutes.

"Up until now, I had no idea who she really was; we never exchanged full names just first names after we met at my mother's ball. When she was getting dressed I went to my office to retrieve a copy of the NDA we both signed the night before for her. It was then that I saw her entire name…Anastasia Steele" I explain.

"That's a very pretty name Christian, but I'm not sure I'm following the significance?" he asks.

"She stole Seattle E Books from right underneath me a few months ago" I answer.

"Stole?" he asks.

"I offered them a large sum of money to purchase their company and out of nowhere she comes in and somehow manages to convince them to sell the company to her! I even offered them more money and their response was that it wasn't about the money! Of course it was about the money! Everything is about money!" I yell.

"Take a deep breath Christian" Dr. Flynn instructs. "This isn't the first company you've lost; another one will come along and you will gobble it up like all the others. Tell me what this has to do with Anastasia."

"I don't know what to think now!" I say angrily. "Before I knew who she was, I was so happy that I finally found her again and was looking forward to spending more time with her. We connected with each other so deeply; it's more than just both of us being new to the lifestyle-we both recognize that."

"What does this change for you? Surely over the years you have lost companies to others that you later have workings with…how is this different?" He asks.

"What happens if we both want the same company again in the future? How will that affect our scenes? What if I take my anger out on her?" I ramble.

"Are you angry with her?" He asks gently.

"Of course!" I exclaim. "Well….maybe….not necessarily at her. I'm mostly angry about losing the company."

"Did this purchase mean that much to you?" he asks.

"I suppose not…I mean it was a new industry that I was looking forward to getting involved in but really I know very little about the publishing world. It was going to be a new adventure" I answer honestly.

"Take a deep breath and think for a moment Christian" he instructs. "Do you honestly think you would take your anger out on her right now if she was at your apartment in your playroom?"

"No" I sigh. "I would never want to hurt her in that way. I don't want to beat women; that's not why I'm exploring BDSM. I want to maintain control but I would never want to injure her or anyone else."

"What was her reaction to learning that she ended up winning the company you were both trying to get?" Dr. Flynn asks.

"I don't know….I don't think she knows" I answer.

"You haven't spoken to her?" he asks.

"No, I had Taylor drive her home and I haven't spoken to her since" I say embarrassed.

"Do you think it would be helpful to discuss this with her? Maybe you two can come to a compromise on how your business lives affect your bedroom lives?" He asks.

"I suppose" I sigh. "I'm just not sure they can be separate."

"Christian" he begins. "You aren't business rivals; do you honestly think you're going to be fighting over the same companies in the future? You yourself said getting into the publishing industry was a new venture for you…do you think Anastasia is going to be interested in other industries? What are her business interests? Is it exclusively publishing or is this a starting point?"

"I don't know" I answer honestly. "We haven't talked much….like I said until I looked closer at the NDA I didn't even know her last name."

"I think you know what your next step needs to be" he says.

"Yes" I sigh leaving the office.

**Ana's POV:**

It's been several days since I left Christian's penthouse and I haven't heard from him. I gave Taylor my business card with the personal cell phone number on back before he pulled away and requested that he give the card to Christian. Once Taylor dropped me off at the Heathman and I returned to my room, I looked at the NDA and finally learned Christian's full name. It's kind of funny that after spending the night with him and being intimate with him several times we never exchanged contact information or even full names. In Taiwan it was different; we both clearly knew it was a one-time thing…well technically a two time thing. Once I saw Christian's name I immediately went to google to see what I could find on him; I had never heard of him before but I figured at the very least I could find a social media page or something that I could learn more about him on. Imagine my surprise when I learned Christian Grey is a multi-billionaire who is Seattle's most eligible bachelor! Seriously, who would have thought? It certainly explains his ability to afford the very large penthouse and to have a complete playroom built especially with all the hand carved pieces.

I am still confused at his sudden change in mood when we left the playroom the other day; I didn't expect him to suddenly drop me so quickly. I've done nothing but replay our last scene together in my head over the last several days trying to determine if I did something that would have caused him to act so differently. He seemed to have enjoyed our last scene together, even if it was a punishment session. He is the one who brought up seeing me again and asking if I would want to spend every weekend with him. I know he was disappointed when I suggested that I return to the hotel to get work done, but certainly a man in his position would understand that sometimes business calls. Now I'm stuck because I'm not sure what to do. I wasn't able to find an email address for him on his company's website; which I suppose makes sense as he wouldn't want hundreds of emails from random people. I found his company's phone number, but I don't know that I feel comfortable just calling his office. What would I say? Hi, this is Ana….the girl who is fucking your boss?

"Hi Ana!" Kate says as I answer the phone.

"Kate, how are you?" I ask.

"I'm good Ana….how are you?" she replies.

"Busy working of course" I answer.

"What are you doing Friday night?" Kate asks.

_That's a great question….I haven't heard from Christian in almost two weeks. Last weekend came and went with no contact from him. _

"I don't have any plans yet" I answer sighing.

"Want to go to club?" Kate asks.

"I don't know Kate" I reply; clubs are not really my thing.

"Come on Ana" Kate begs. "You've been back here for months now and I've barely seen by BFF. Please Ana?"

"Fine Kate" I agree.

"Great! Dress sexy this club is tons of hot guys!" Kate exclaims happily.

"Will do…should I meet you there?" I ask.

"Nah, I will pick you up" Kate answers.

"Sounds good" I reply.

"What's going on with you and Christian?" Kate asks.

"I have no idea" I sigh. "I have heard from him since the day after the ball. I thought things went really well but he hasn't contacted me."

"It's his loss Ana….we will find you someone else this weekend!" Kate exclaims happily before hanging up.

I'm not going to put my life on hold and wait for Christian to decide if he wants to contact me again. Clearly he has decided that perhaps we are not as good as a match as I originally thought. I can't believe that after finding Christian again, I am back to where I was when I came back from Taiwan. Nothing has changed; just as I find the BDSM helps me I am left with no dom again and my life is beginning to spin out of control again. I have been working closely with Seattle E Books and SIP to insure that their systems can interact together, having our IT department fix some of the bugs that were found. IT continues to find bugs that place the system at Seattle E books at risk so they are recommending that we replace the entire system. I have been working closely with the heads of both companies learning their processes and procedures which has been going well, but people are so stuck in their ways that they often don't like when their practices are being questioned. Maybe going out this weekend with Kate isn't such a bad idea after all; I could definitely use a drink.

The rest of the week drags on with no contact from Christian not that I'm surprised. I leave on time for once on Friday night so I can get ready to go to the club with Kate. After eating a quick dinner I decide to take a long hot bath to relax from the long week. Feeling much more relaxed from the hot bath, I go to the closet and try to find something to wear. Kate said to dress sexy so I think I'm going to wear the short black dress that I wore the first night I met Christian. Although this is not something I typically would wear, tonight I'm ready to say Fuck it to the world.

"Wow Ana you look hot!" Kate exclaims when I meet her in the lobby of the hotel.

"So you do you Kate!" I reply.

Kate is dressed in a short purple cocktail dress with sky high heels that show off her legs. We climb into the waiting cab and are quickly escorted to the club which is only a matter of blocks from the hotel. I honestly I really could have walked here but in heels this would not have been an easy task. Kate gives our name to the bouncer outside the club and we are granted immediate access and shown to the VIP area. Kate explains that her company gave her VIP passes to the club tonight as part of some promotion they had done ages ago. The club is packed which explains the long line outside but Kate quickly finds us a table and orders martinis.

"Hey there beautiful ladies" Elliot interrupts us as Kate is telling me about a new project she has going on at work.

"Elliot! What a nice surprise!" Kate jumps up hugging Elliot.

"Kate, you remember my brother Christian right?" Elliot says just as Christian walks up behind him.

"Yes, hi Christian. Please will you join us?" Kate asks smiling at me.

"If you don't mind" Christian says.

"Of course not, right Ana?" Kate asks.

"That's fine" I sigh, feeling as if I have been set up. "How are you Elliot?"

"I'm great now that I found my girl" Elliot kisses Kate.

"If you will excuse me, I'm going to dance" I leave the table before anyone can respond.

I don't like the idea of being set up by Kate and really would rather not sit with someone who wants nothing to do with me. I go to the bar, downing a shot before heading to the dance floor and start losing myself in the music. The music makes it very easy to lose yourself, especially with everyone dancing around you. Suddenly I feel hands my on hips and someone's chest against my back. I quickly look behind me expecting to find Christian instead I find a tall dark haired good looking man smiling down at me. I close my eyes and continue to get lost in the music at the guy behind me dances with me closely, grinding his pelvis against my ass. His hands don't leave my hips which I'm grateful for; the moment he tries to move them further I will put an end to the dance.

"Excuse me" I hear a familiar voice behind me.

"No, excuse me. I'm dancing here" the man behind me says gripping my hips a little tighter.

"Not with my girl you're not" Christian says pulling the guy off of me.

"Well if she was your girl what was she doing on the dance floor by herself?" the dark haired man yells.

"That's none of you business" Christian says taking my hand in his and pulling me off the dance floor.

"What the hell Christian?" I jerk my hand away.

"What do you think you're doing Anastasia?" Christian asks.

"Dancing…maybe you've heard of it?" I yell. "What's it to you?"

"I don't like you dancing with him" Christian mumbles so I can barely hear it over the loud music.

"Why do you give a shit? You've made it clear you could care less what I do" I head back to the table.

Of course as my luck would have it Kate and Elliot are nowhere to be found. I was hoping they would be at the table so I could avoid talking to Christian further. I take finish my martini in one gulp, grab my purse and head for the door. I will text Kate from a cab, I'm not going to sit here with Christian and try to figure out why he is getting so upset that I'm having a good time tonight.

"Ana wait!" Christian yells as I step out of the club.

"For what? You want to have Taylor drive me home again? Don't bother, I can get my own cab this time Christian" I say angrily.

"Please Ana…." He begs holding my hand tightly.

"Please what?" I reply.

"Please…give me a chance to explain what happened" he begs.

"Fine…explain" I plant my feet firmly on the sidewalk.

"Please, let's not do this here. Let me drive you back to the hotel, we can talk on the way" Christian looks at me with his eyes begging.

"Fine…at least I won't have to wait for a cab" I reluctantly agree.

Christian leads me to his awaiting SUV where Taylor holds the door open so we could climb in. We settle on opposite sides of the seat and sit in silence for a few moments.

"I am so sorry for the way I treated you" Christian says.

"I'm listening" I reply crossing my arms over my chest.

"I didn't know who you were until I made a copy of the NDA for you" Christian states as if that should explain everything.

"So? What does my name have anything to do with why you discarded me like a piece of trash?" I yell as my eyes fill with tears.

"You don't know who I am do you?" Christian asks.

"Only what I read on google, so what?" I answer confused.

"You recently purchased Seattle E Books, right?" He asks.

"Yes, again what does this have to do with anything?" I answer.

"My company was in line to purchase them before you swept in and bought them" he explains.

"And?" I ask.

"I was thrown for a loop when I saw your name. I can't even begin to tell you everything that went through my head. I didn't see how we could make anything work if we were business rivals" he says.

"But we're not Christian" I sigh. "You're in mergers and acquisitions; I'm in publishing. We're not running businesses that compete with one another."

"I know" he runs his hands through his hair. "I realize that now."

"So you couldn't call me or email me in the last two weeks?" I wipe a tear from my cheek.

"I'm so sorry, Ana" He unbuckles his seatbelt and pulls me in for a deep hug.

"Sir, ma'am we are at the Heathman" Taylor interrupts us stopping the car.

"Please give me another chance Ana" Christian begs kissing me deeply.

"Can we talk about it some more? I think there's a lot of things we need to work out still" I pull away.

"Yes, whatever you want. Do you want to talk now?" he answers quickly.

"We can go up to my room and talk I suppose" I sigh stepping out of the car.

Christian quickly says something to Taylor before coming to my side and following me inside. I try not to overthink what is going on as we ride the elevator up to my suite. I don't know if I'm making the right decision but all I know is I lost this man once and I don't want to walk away too quickly again. If there's a chance of making this work, I need to take it.


	10. Chapter 10

_Author's Note: Thank you all for your reviews! I enjoy reading each one! I hope this chapter answers some of your questions...always remember there are two sides to every story._

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James_.

**Chpt. 10 Ana's POV:**

"Would you like a drink?" I ask as we enter my hotel room.

"Whatever you have will be fine" Christian answers.

I pour us both a glass of wine and walk over to the couch in the living room where Christian joins me. I'm honestly not sure where I want this conversation to go; I am confused on so many levels. On one hand we connected so well with one another not just in Taiwan but also in Christian's apartment a couple weeks ago. Neither of us was able to find someone else we could be intimate with because we were waiting for the other person, that has to mean something right? But, I will not stand for him treating me like a piece of trash that can easily be discarded when he doesn't like something. I may want to be a sub in the bedroom but I won't tolerate someone treating me as if I am below them.

"Ana" Christian says taking a deep breath. "I cannot apologize enough for the way I treated you. I over reacted and for that I am so sorry. I realize it was wrong but the moment I realized who you were my mind just went crazy at all the possibilities."

"The possibilities?" I ask.

"Ugh" he says running his hands through is hair. "Honestly, this will probably make you hate me more but my first thought was that you did all of this just to get closer to my company – to steal other deals from me."

"What?! No that's not –" I reply angrily.

"I know Ana" Christian pauses. "Like I said, that was my first thought. I immediately knew it was possible; you had no idea who I was in Taiwan plus an entire year had gone by before we saw one another again. I couldn't wrap my head around how we could make this work if we were business rivals; how would our real lives not get in the way?"

"Christian, we're not business rivals. I have no desire to take over any other companies, trust me my plate is full. I wasn't even looking for another company after SIP but Seattle E Books came along and it complimented SIP perfectly. I'm not into buying and selling companies the way you are; I just want to publish books" I explain.

"I know, I had several sessions with my therapist and he helped me realize that all the complications were in my head and likely unrealistic" He sighs.

"So if you realized this, why didn't you call or email me? I gave Taylor my card –" I question frustrated.

"But I did Ana! I emailed you every day, you never responded to me! I thought that was your way of telling me that you could never forgive me for the way I treated you" he pleads.

"I didn't get a single email from you" I say pulling out my iphone and searching my emails by his name.

"Ana, look at my phone" he pulls out his blackberry, clicking on the sent folder and searching my name.

"What? I didn't….why didn't these come through?" I ask puzzled.

"I don't know, but please read them" Christian gives me his phone. "Start with the oldest…I sent you an email that night."

_To: Ana  
From: Christian  
Subject: Deepest apologies_

_Ana,  
I am so sorry that I did not drive you home tonight, please email me or call me at 897-555-1562 so I can explain.  
Christian_

_To: Ana  
From: Christian  
Subject: Please_

_Ana,  
Please call me…I cannot apologize enough for last night. I need to talk to you, PLEASE  
Christian_

I read through more than a dozen emails all similar to the first few, begging me to call him and for a chance to explain. I am more confused than ever now; all these emails say they were delivered and he has my correct email address at SIP on it. How could I have not gotten these emails? No one has access to my emails; not even Stacy.

"I don't understand" Is the only thing I can say.

"I thought since you didn't call or email me you didn't want anything to do with me. I didn't know what else to do…This is all so new to me…"Christian explains.

"Why didn't I get these emails? How could they have not come through? This doesn't make any sense" I say frustrated.

"The email address I sent it to matches the one on your card; is it printed wrong?" he asks.

"No, it's correct" I pull a business card out of my purse to show him.

"Your email address is at SIP, does anyone else have access to your account? Could it have been flagged by your IT department for some reason?" He asks.

"No, when I changed email addressed they were instructed to allow all emails through to my account unless they are clearly spam and those are to be reviewed daily just incase something gets in that shouldn't" I explain.

"Is it possible someone hacked into the server at SIP?" Christian asks.

"No…" I pause. "Shit!"

"What?" Christian asks concerned.

"We just switched our email server over to the one at Seattle E Books as they had more space than the one at SIP did. Just the other day my IT guy recommended we upgrade some software on their server because he felt we were at risk for hacking. But why would someone target my email? And ones from you specifically?" I ponder.

"Could it be someone at Seattle E Books?" Christian asks.

"Maybe" I sigh. "There's an editor there that has a lengthy criminal record that worries me but the owners swear he is a perfect employee."

"Would you like me to have my IT guy look into it? I promise Ana, I won't him look at any other emails or anything on the server. Just see if he can determine what happened to the emails I sent you?" Christian suggests.

"I don't know…."I take a deep breath thinking about my options. "I suppose if you can swear he won't look at anything else on the server. I don't want to ask our IT department as I'm not as comfortable with them yet especially if this is an inside job."

"I promise you Ana, Barney won't touch anything else on the servers. I'm going to call him right now so he can get to the bottom of this" Christian immediately finds the number in his phone.

"Christian, it's late this can wait –" I glance at the clock.

"Barney, I need your help. I sent several emails to Anastasia Steele over the last two weeks however they were not received. I need to you to look into why the emails were not received, we suspect someone may have diverted the emails before they reached her inbox…yes do what's necessary…Barney, you are only to look at the email issue-nothing else on the servers understood? Good…call me when you have info" Christian hangs up the phone.

"It could have waited until Monday" I sigh.

"I pay Barney enough money that he is available when I need him" Christian says. "Now, please tell me you will give me another chance? I want to make this up to you…"

"Christian I don't know what to think right now….you really hurt me when you tossed me aside" I explain.

"I know Ana, and I am so sorry. Please know that I never meant to treat you like that, I was wrong and if you let me I will do everything possible to show you how sorry I am and try to make it up to you" he begs.

"Christian if something like this comes up again, I need to know that you are going to be comfortable talking to me about it first. I know our…well whatever this is between us….is different but you need to be able to talk to me about things like this when they come up. If it's going to interfere with our…whatever….we need to talk about it" I say.

"I know…I promise if you give me another chance I will talk to you when something comes up. Please Ana give me another chance" Christian takes my hands in his looking me in the eye so I can see how truly sorry he is.

"Okay…." I sigh.

"Okay? Really?" His eyes full of hope.

"Yes, but know that I don't give second chances away easily" I warn.

"I know" he pulls me into a hug. "Thank you Ana."

"Christian, it's getting late but we need to think about what exactly this is between us. When you thought about getting involved in BDSM at first how did you see it working with woman?" I ask as he sits back on the couch.

"Honestly?" he asks and I nod. "I originally just thought I would find a woman I would be compatible with sexually and we would spend time in my playroom together. That our _relationship_ so to speak would be exclusive to the bedroom."

"I see" I say disappointed.

In my mind that's what I wanted originally too; for someone to strictly dominate and take control in the bedroom. But with Christian it's different…

"But I don't know that's still want I want" Christian says interrupting my thoughts.

"What do you want?" I whisper, somewhat afraid to hear his response.

"I don't know" Christian sighs, running his hands through his hair. "I love what we had in the playroom and in Taiwan. I think we are a good match in the bedroom; but seeing you with another guy on the dance floor tonight had me seeing red. I don't want to think of you with anyone else."

"Well….we could insist that we are exclusive with each other" I suggest.

"Absolutely, there should be no one else for either of us…." Christian pauses.

"But?" I prompt.

"I don't know if it's possible but I think I want to spend time with you outside the playroom too" he says shyly looking at the floor.

"I would like that" I reassure him.

"I think we just need to figure out how that would work" he says.

"Yeah, I don't want to be controlled outside the bedroom. I like being able to talk like this and feel equal to you" I explain.

"Me too" Christian says.

"So maybe we try a combination of some sort? Dom/Sub arrangement in the playroom but when we are not in a scene…." I break off not knowing how to word what I'm trying to say.

"Something like that…we will figure it out" Christian says.

Christian leans into kiss me, looking in my eyes almost as if he wants permission before going any further. I nod my head slightly and he moves closer to me until our lips touch and almost immediately I feel the same zap of electricity that I felt when he took my hand at the charity ball. His lips feel so soft against mine as he gently pushes his lips further against mine. I bring my hands to his neck, running my fingers through his soft hair that I have missed over the last few weeks. He only let me touch his hair once in Taiwan and except for that one time he always restrains my hands when we are intimate.

"I should probably go…"Christian just barely whispers between kisses.

"You don't have to" I kiss him deeply, my tongue caressing his lips which open just slightly.

"If I stay I don't know that I will be able to stop, it's been a long couple of weeks without you" he says pulling away.

"Do you want to stay?" I ask.

"Yes" he sighs. "Do you want me to stay?"

"Christian, I would very much like you to spend the night with me" I move on top of him so I am straddling his lap.

"Taylor…I'm staying here tonight…I will call you in the morning" Christian says into his phone before hanging up and tossing it on the floor.

Christian pulls me closer to him, capturing my mouth with his this time the kiss is full of hunger and passion. I feel comfortable with my decision to ask him to stay tonight; I think talked about a lot and at least have a better understanding of what we want and don't want from this arrangement. I'm still not sure what to call it; are we dating? Just fucking but occasionally talking? I think a title for what we are doing is less important as we both know we want more than to just be kinky fuck buddies.

I keep my hands in his hair remember he said in Taiwan that he didn't want me to touch his chest; I'm not sure what that's about but hopefully one day he will tell me about it. I feel his tongue against my lips seeking entry which I immediately grant as I gently grind my sex against his ever growing erection. Since this dress is so short, it's practically around my waist which he quickly realizes as his hands find my ass pushing me harder against his erection causing me to moan loudly.

"Take the dress off" he directs.

I reach down and slowly pull the dress over my head making it a point to grind against his erection as the dress slowly exposes the cut out bra that I wore our second night in Taiwan. My his groan I can tell he approves of the bra and likely remembers that night as well as I do. His arms wrap around my back pulling my breasts to his face allowing him to suck on my nipples. His hands find the clasp, within seconds the bra falls down giving him full access to my breasts.

"Hmmmmmmmmmmmm" I moan as he bites my nipple gently.

He returns his attention to my mouth as he pushes my hips down so my sex grinds against his erection. He quickly stands up, startling me causing me to grab a hold of his neck tightly; he carries me into the bedroom and places me gently on bed before removing my now saturated thong. He climbs on the bed but immediately moves down towards my legs. He pushes my legs apart before laying down so his face is against my sex. He blows gently on my clit sending shivers through my body just before he slowly explores my sex with his tongue. His tongue is everywhere as he holds my thighs apart giving me better access just as his mouth finds my clit and he latches on tightly.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I moan as he sucks hard.

The orgasm rushes to the surface only minutes after his mouth finds my sex and I find myself grabbing the sheets trying to hold in the screams. We haven't exactly talked about the rules in the bedroom as far as voicing pleasure is concerned so I suppose he can't punish for me for breaking a rule that we didn't already establish. Although it's pretty much known that the sub doesn't speak until told to do so by the dom. My attention is immediately returned to the present when Christian's finger enters me deeply.

"Oh God!" I scream no longer able to contain myself.

"Do you like that?" he looks up at me.

"Yes….don't stop….please don't stop" I say as his finger plunges in and out of me.

His mouth returns to my clit just as he adds a second finger and I am nearing the edge. The orgasm is so close; I'm just waiting for permission to come. My hand pushes his head closer to my clit encouraging him to suck harder as my hips involuntarily try to buck against his hand getting his fingers to move deeper inside of me.

"Please Christian…..Please….." I beg knowing that I won't be able to last much longer.

"I've got you" he says curling his fingers forward deep inside of me hitting my g spot perfectly.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" I scream loudly. "Please Christian!"

"What is it Ana? Tell me what you need?" He asks full of concern.

"I need to come Christian!" I yell.

"Come Ana!" he commends just before his mouth latches on to my clit hard again.

"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I yell as the orgasm rips through my body.

Christian's fingers continue to plunge in and out of me, letting me ride out my orgasm as long as possible. He climbs up to my face kissing me deeply; I can taste my juices on his lips but I don't care as I pull his face closer to me his fingers still deep inside of me. As my orgasm finally subsides, Christian gently removes his finger and rolls off of me pulling my back close to his chest. We sleep like this the entire night and I wake only when the sun shines brightly through my window reminding me that I forgot to close the curtains before we fell asleep. Glancing at the clock I see that it is barely seven in the morning and realize Christian is still sound asleep next to me. I'm pleased with how our conversation went last night and even though we still have a lot to learn about how the BDSM lifestyle is going to work for us I think we have at least opened the lines of communication.

I quickly grab a robe and head to the bathroom to wash up and brush my teeth while Christian lays motionless in my bed sound asleep. I go out to the living room, checking a few emails seeing several from Stacy indicating the movers will be here this afternoon to take the few items I have in the hotel room to my new apartment at Escala which I closed on yesterday morning. The remainder of my items from my apartment in New York will be arriving on Monday which I'm looking forward to because there are a few items from home that I truly miss especially several paintings that were hanging in my bedroom.

"Have you been awake long?" Christian walks out of the bedroom.

"About an hour or so" I say looking at the clock.

"Are you moving this weekend?" Christian looks at all the boxes around the room.

"Yes, the movers will be arriving this afternoon" I reply.

"Grey" Christian answers his phone. "What did you find? (pause) Really? (pause) How was that possible? (pause) Send me his name. Well done Barney."

"Everything okay?" I ask.

"That was Barney with an update on your email issue" Christian explains.

"And?" I take a deep breath.

"It seems your email was hacked internally; actually from a company owned computer. The emails from me were removed from the server before they ever reached your inbox. It appears all of your emails are being held before they are delivered to your inbox for you to review. Barney says there isn't much of a delay so you likely wouldn't even notice that you did not receive them immediately" Christian explains.

"Were any other emails removed from the server?" I ask.

"Not that Barney can tell" Christian answers.

"How the fuck can something like this happen?" I ask angrily.

"Barney believes the person who hacked into the server had all the log in credentials necessary to access the email servers. From there he set up a simple email diversion program which forwarded all your emails to a dummy account before they were sent to your inbox" Christian answers.

"Does he know who did this?" I'm beyond furious.

"Yes…" Christian pauses reading an email on his phone. "An employee by the name Jack Hyde."

"Son of a bitch!" I scream. "I knew there was something up with that bastard the moment I saw his criminal record!"

"Barney has temporarily transferred your email account to a server at GEH until you can get someone to fix the hack. This will prevent any other emails from getting deleted without your knowledge. I give you my word your email will not be monitored by GEH" Christian promises.

"Thank you for allowing me to use your resources, I will have this resolved by the end of the week" I vow.

"It's not a problem. Take as long as you need; if you need Barney's assistance let me know" he says.

I send an email to Stacy requesting she schedule a meeting with HR for first thing Monday morning immediately followed by a meeting with Jack Hyde. I wasn't thrilled with having someone with such an extensive criminal record working for me in the first place but this is icing on the cake. He will be out on his ass by 10am on Monday morning for invading my privacy. The only thing that bothers me is why I was targeted and why it was only Christian's emails that were deleted before they were delivered.

"We will take a shower and then grab some breakfast" Christian interrupts my thoughts.

"No, I have too much to do. I need to pack the last few things, respond to a few more emails, I need to move the boxes –" I begin.

"Ana…it was not a request" Christian says with a firm voice standing tall above me.

I've seen this look, this is his dom stance I quickly realize. Although I have a significant amount of things to do before the movers arrive in a few hours I remind myself that as a sub I'm supposed to trust that my dom knows exactly what I need even if I don't always recognize the need. That's what giving up control is all about; for a few moments I don't have to make the decisions. With the chaos of the morning and the likely craziness of the remainder of today I understand Christian maybe right even if my first instinct was to refuse.

"Yes sir" I say looking at the floor as Christian leads me into the bathroom.

My eyes remain fixed on the floor as Christian turns the shower water on and gently unties my robe before sliding it down my arms allowing it to collect on the floor. I hear Christian removing his clothing before he opens the shower door and pulls me in with him. He guides me under the shower head, soaking my hair and my body as my eyes remain fixed on the floor. He quickly trades places with me so he is now under the shower.

"Put your arms above your head and don't move them" he instructs.

I immediately comply, lifting my arms above my head just as he pulls my face up and devours my lips with his. His hand is wrapped around my wrists holding my arms up tightly, as his other hand roams my body. He flexes his hips and I immediately feel his erection gently poking at my sex as I moan into his mouth granting his tongue full access. His hand gently pushes my legs apart, allowing him to rub his entire erection along my folds just as his mouth finds my nipple. He sucks hard on me for several minutes while he continues flexing his hips teasing me with his erection. I quickly feel an orgasm approaching just before he stops his assault on my breasts and my sex.

"On your knees" he directs.

Disappointed he is leaving me on the edge, I take a deep breath reminding myself he is in charge and I slowly fall to my knees as he instructed. He takes his erection in his hand stroking it several times in front of my face before guiding himself into my mouth. I immediately take him into my mouth, sucking him hard as his hand remains on my head allowing me to set the pace. He moans loudly when my hand finds his balls, fondling them gently. I am so focused on listening to his moans and pleasing him that everything that is going on right now quickly fades to the back of my mind. He gently guides my head closer to him, so I take him deep into the back of my throat. Once I take him as deep as I can, struggling not to gag, I swallow around him remember how much he enjoyed this the last time. He pulls back slightly, before pushing himself in deep again. This pattern continues for several minutes and I find myself taking him deeper without struggling as much. His pace suddenly picks up as his moans get louder; I'm struggling with the pace he is setting, getting close to asking him to slow down when he suddenly erupts against the back of my throat. I immediately swallow around him as he gently moves in and out of my mouth as his orgasm begins to subside.

"Stand up" He orders. "Put your leg on the side of the tub."

I immediately comply as he drops to his knees in front of me, his mouth quickly finding my sex. My head falls back against the cool shower wall has his tongue runs up and down my sex, his hands grasping my ass firmly. I moan loudly as his tongue runs gently over my clit providing just enough pressure…

"Shhhhhhhhhhh….quiet" he stops his assault on me.

Ugh! He can't be serious! Again, I take a deep breath and remind myself who is in charge as his mouth once again finds my sex. He pulls my hips closer to him, allowing him to have more access as his tongue darts just inside of me. I grip my firsts tightly, trying hard not to moan in ecstasy as he continues the wonderful torture on my sex. He tongue continues to explore my entire area, not spending too much time on any one area before moving to the next. When I least expect it, his mouth finds my clit and he sucks it hard nearly pushing me over the edge. The orgasm is almost within reach, my breathing is heavy and I'm not sure how much longer I can wait when he suddenly pulls away and stands up.

"Turn around, hands against the wall" He directs.

I immediately comply although I am not sure what his plan is at this point; all I know is that I need a release and soon. He comes closely up behind me, pulling my thigh up so my leg once again rests on the edge of the tub. His one hand finds my breast just as the other finds my sex; I can't help myself when my hips involuntarily buck against him trying to get him to enter me. Once again, just as the orgasm approaches, he stops all actions. He gently pulls my hips back, forcing me to take a couple steps back as he pushes on my back so I am slightly bent over. His hands return to their previous placements, this time he pinches my nipple and clit hard causing me to gasp.

_Wack!_ He slaps my ass hard.

"I said quiet" he says pinching me clit hard again before thrusting a finger deep inside of me.

It takes everything in me to not cry out as his fingers continues to plunge gently in and out of me. Just as I feel the orgasm coming within reach, I feel his erection probing my folds as I sigh in relief. His hands move to me hips as he quickly pushes into me, causing me to moan loudly. He either chose to ignore this or didn't hear it because he makes no effort to address it. He pulls out nearly all the way, slamming into me roughly.

"Come Ana!" He order as he slams into me while pinching my clit and nipple simultaneously.

"Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm" I hold in a mumbled scream as the orgasm takes.

Christian does not let up, he grabs my hips and continues fucking me hard prolonging the orgasm. Every time he enters me, he hits that magical spot just as his balls slap against me. He slams into me deeply, grabbing hold of my shoulders pulling me closer to him which pushes him even deeper inside of me.

"You are so tight….I love being so deep inside of you" he moans causing me to silently whimper at his words.

While holding onto my shoulders, he begins to move in and out of me. In this position he cannot pull out all the way but he is able to hit deeper inside of me every time he enters me. I can't believe my body is responding so quickly, as once again the orgasm is just within reach.

"Play with your clit" he instructs.

I've never pleasured myself, but knowing that he wants me to do this I immediately comply. My fingers quickly find my clit, rubbing it slowly alternating the amount of pressure I put on it. Christian continues thrusting in and out of me deeply, the multitude of sensations is quickly becoming too much as the next orgasm is about to take over.

"God….you feel so good…..Come with me Ana!" he commands just as we both find our release together.

He continues to gently move in and out of me prolonging both of our orgasms as he reaches down and puts his hand over mind guiding me to my clit again. I'm overly sensitive, the combination of movements is too much for me and I whimper. He must sense that it's too much as he gently wraps his arms around me pulling me so I am standing against him. He pulls out of me, before turning me so I am under the shower. He gently washes my hair and my body as I come down from the incredible shower sex. As he begins washing his own body, I notice several prominent round scars all over his chest and his back. I don't bring it up, but I realize it likely has something to do with him not wanting me to touch his chest and the reason my hands are always restrained when we are intimate.


	11. Chapter 11

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 11 Ana's POV:**

Later that day I am unpacking in my new apartment looking back at the last couple of days and everything that has happened. I am glad that I decided to hear Christian out last night; had I written him off too fast I never would have known that he emailed me over those two weeks and that I had an employee who was hacking into my email account. Just when things began spinning out of control this morning, Christian stepped into dom mode knowing exactly what I needed. After the amazing shower sex I felt much more focused and in control. He quickly helped me pack up the last few boxes just as the movers arrived and took me out for lunch before driving me to Escala. He went back to his apartment as I went to mine to begin unpacking. It takes me several hours but I finally have the apartment completely unpacked; at least until the rest of my belongings arrive from New York.

_Join me for dinner tonight? –C _

_Would love to. –A _

_Come up when you can. Code to the elevator is 06547 –C _

_See you soon –A _

It was a pleasant surprise to hear from Christian since when we parted ways we said we would talk during the week as we both had a lot to do tonight. Unfortunately I have nothing that I can take to his apartment for dinner, not even a bottle of wine, since I haven't had a chance to go food shopping today. I vow tomorrow after work to find a grocery store and seriously stock up my new kitchen. I love to cook, and prefer a home cooked meal after work whenever possible. I'm pretty tired of hotel food and eating out which is mostly all I have done since I arrived in Seattle a few months ago.

I take a quick shower realizing I am pretty sweaty from unpacking today and throw on a pair of skinny jeans with an oversized red blouse before heading to Christian's. I use the code he provided and the elevator immediately grants me access to the only floor above mine. Taylor greats me in the foyer and escorts me to the great room where he says Christian will join me momentarily.

"I thought you might want a drink?" Christian suggests handing me a glass of red wine.

"Yes, thank you" I answer.

"Are you all unpacked?" he asks as we sit on the sofa.

"For now," I laugh. "The rest of my stuff arrives tomorrow from New York so I will still have some unpacking to do the rest of the week."

"I hate moving just for that reason…it seems like you never finish unpacking" he says.

"When I moved to New York I had boxes in my closet for a year before I finally unpacked them" I agree.

"Sir, ma'am dinner is ready" Gail announces.

"Shall we?" Christian asks taking my hand.

"Thank you" I answer as he leads me to the beautiful dining room where the table has been set.

We enjoy a delicious roasted chicken and potato dinner that Gail prepared while making small talk about the business world. We return back to the great room with another glass of wine after dinner.

"How did you start your business?" I ask.

"I was in Harvard, majoring in business administration when I grew tired of focusing on the books and just wanted to get into the real world. One of my classes required we draw up a business plan including financial data which sparked my immediate interest. I spent so many hours on this project deciding to use this assignment to develop my true business plan. While the professor was impressed, what it reinforced in me is that I didn't belong in college. I needed to be in the real world, so I went home on winter break that year and told my parents I was dropping out of college" he answers.

"Wow, they must have been upset" I say.

"To some degree, at least initially yes" He explains. "But when my dad reviewed the business plan that I wrote he saw the potential. I was not able to secure my own business loan since I was so young and basically had no credit history so my parents cosigned the loan for me using their house as collateral. My business immediately took off and within a year I was able to pay the entire loan off with interest. I started by purchasing a small communications company, quickly turning it around so it started making a profit by changing its marketing strategy. That was when I saw the potential to fix other companies but providing additional resources or redirection. I followed similar plans with the next couple of businesses and my company grew from there. Today we still purchase companies with a goal to adjust their strategy so they have a bottom line, however there are other companies we now purchase simply to break apart and sell."

"I see" I say.

"What about you? How did you come to purchase SIP and Seattle E Books?" He asks.

"After I graduated from college, I was offered an assistant editor position with a large publishing company in New York. I quickly accepted the position without knowing much about the company, picked up and moved across the country to a huge city where I knew no one. I spent a couple years with that company, making several key contacts including several up and coming authors. I did not like the way the company treated its employees or its business contacts; they seem to only want to publish books that would be guaranteed best sellers. They didn't want to take chances with new authors or a book that was in a genre they wasn't typical for them" I explain.

"Sounds like a recipe for business disaster" Christian comments.

"Although I knew very little about business at that point, I realize it now" I begin. "I worked with several authors that I thought had great potential but none of the editors ever wanted to listen. During my second year in New York my dad died unexpectedly of a massive heart attack-"

"I'm so sorry" Christian interrupts.

"Thank you" I sigh. "It was a very rough time, we were very close so it hit me hard. I was surprised to learn that my father had a very large life insurance policy that I was the sole beneficiary of. I ended up selling his house, as I couldn't step back in it without thinking of him. I took the money from the life insurance policy and the sale of the house, after covering all the funeral costs, and decided to start my own publishing company. A couple of the authors that I thought had potential decided to follow me since they were not contracted with the large publishing company. Several of those authors had best selling novels within the first year of contracting with me."

"Wow, I guess your intuition was right" he says in awe.

"Or it was just luck…the plan could have back fired completely on me" I admit. "I knew very little about the business world when I decided to start my own business. Luckily I found an employee with a strong business background who specialized in finances. He guided me through the business world and was the one who brought SIP and Seattle E books to my attention. I had been looking to expand the company but knew that I couldn't do it by myself and New York is such a competitive market. When SIP came up, it seemed like the perfect opportunity. They need financial backing but had a lot of potential in the publishing industry."

"I agree, it was why we initially looked at them" Christian interjects.

"You looked at SIP?" I asked surprised.

"We did…." He pauses. "I knew they needed a significant amount of financial backing but I wasn't convinced that their business plan was solid to survive. They seemed to focus strictly on printing, yet were missing a key piece of the industry – electronic publishing."

"That was my first impression as well" I agree. "However, my plan was to almost immediately introduce electronic publishing as soon as things settled down. Just as we finalized the sale of SIP, my finance guy Bob found Seattle E books and brought it to my attention."

"I have to ask, if you don't mind sharing" he smiles. "How did you get Mr. and Mrs. Snyder to sale? I increased the purchase price and they still declined, saying it wasn't about the money."

"Interesting, I had no idea you upped the purchased price" I say. "The first time I set eyes on the Snyder's I knew they weren't going to be motivated by money."

"Really? How did you know that?" he asks.

"Simple, they were in love" I answer but continue as he looks at me confused. "It was obvious from looking at them that they were madly in love with each other and that this was their baby. I gave them an opportunity to remain in control of their baby while preventing their baby from sinking. I proposed that they merge with SIP; they will still manage the day to day operations of their company however they will have the opportunity to publish more books with SIP providing support to them. In turn, SIP will be able to electronically publish books by partnering with Seattle E Books. It's a win win for both companies since each one brings what the other was lacking."

"That's an interesting approach" Christian admits.

"It was risky taking on two new companies at once and moving everything across the country but in the end I believe the payoff will be worth it" I say.

"Well personally I'm pleased that you decided to move across country again" he smiles.

"Me too" I admit shyly. "But I should be going now, I have an early morning meeting tomorrow with HR."

"Thank you for joining me for dinner" Christian walks me to elevator.

"Thank you, it saved me from ordering out again since I didn't have time to go food shopping today" I smile.

Christian kisses me gently on the lips before the elevator doors open; I step into the elevator and enter the code for my floor just as the doors close. Returning to my apartment, I quickly change into pajamas and climb into my bed. I am really pleased with how tonight went with Christian; our interaction over dinner was exactly what I wanted it to be. He didn't treat me like a sub after our shower session this morning and we enjoyed getting to know a little more about each other. When Christian and I spoke last night this was exactly what I envisioned for us but didn't know how to describe. I want the dom/sub relationship in the bedroom or in the playroom, but outside of there I want a somewhat normal relationship. Granted this whole situation is still new to both of us, I am happy with how we are progressing.

"Good Morning Ms. Steele" Stacy knocks on my door.

"Good Morning Stacy, how was your weekend?" I ask.

"It was good, I am finally completely unpacked from the move" she smiles. "Ah, I know that feeling. I finally moved into my new apartment yesterday."

"I have a meeting scheduled with HR for 9am, followed by the meeting with Jack Hyde at 9:30 as you requested. Both meetings will be in the conference room on this floor" she says.

"Perfect, thank you" I dismiss her.

I quickly finish the breakfast that I grabbed on my way into the office before finalizing the termination letter that I plan to provide to Jack Hyde this morning.

"Good Morning" I say walking into the conference room. "Thank you for meeting with me on short notice."

"Not a problem Ms. Steele" says Maurice the head of HR under SIP. "What can I assist you with today?"

"I have a meeting scheduled with Jack Hyde, an editor with Seattle E Books at 9:30 today to terminate his employment with us" I answer.

"What are the grounds for the termination?" he asks, writing the information down.

"Jack Hyde hacked into our server and set up an email monitoring program in which all of emails were diverted to a dummy account so he could screen them before they were forwarded me. Several emails were subsequently deleted from the server without ever reaching my account" I explain.

"I see" Maurice raises his eyebrows in surprise.

"After the meeting, I want you to escort him out to his office before being escorted out. He is never to be left alone while in this building. I have confiscated his computer, his portable hard drives and various files which are locked in my office. He is to only take personal belongings; no paperwork or company property" I instruct.

"Understood" Maurice says.

"Excuse me Ms. Steele?" Stacy opens the door. "Mr. Hyde is here."

"Please show him in Stacy, thank you" I instruct taking a deep breath.

Jack Hyde walks into the conference room, full of confidence and arrogance. He is a fairly young man, with his straggly hair pulled into an unkempt ponytail wearing jeans and a faded T shirt. I make a mental note to have Stacy send out the dress code policy; this look is completely unacceptable for any employee much less someone that is supposed to be an editor representing the company to potential authors.

"Mr. Hyde, I am Anastasia Steele the owner of SIP" I shake his hand.

"Ms. Steele, it's finally nice to meet you" Jack says holding my hand a little longer the necessary.

"I believe you know Maurice" I say.

"Yes" he answers suspiciously.

"Please have a seat" I gesture. "I am sure you are wondering why I have called you here this early in the morning-"

"I assume it has something to do with the Senior Editor position that was recently announced?" Jack smiles. "I cannot tell you how excited I was when I saw the email on Friday describing this newly created position-"

"Excuse me Mr. Hyde" I interrupt. "On the contrary, this meeting is to inform you that your employment is being terminated with SIP, and by partnership Seattle E Books, effective immediately. You will be escorted to your office by Maurice to collect your personal belongings however you are not permitted to take any company owned files, documents or physical items with you."

"What? What the hell are you talking about?" He raises his voice. "What am I being accused of?"

"Mr. Hyde, we have proof that you have hacked into the server at Seattle E books where you downloaded an email program that provided you access to all of my incoming emails" I confront him.

"What? That is not true, I didn't do anything of the sort" Jack says.

"Mr. Hyde we have proof" I assure him. "This is a clear violation of privacy and is in poor business taste. I will not have my employees hacking into other employees email accounts or access secure information that is stored on the servers. Your employment is being terminated for this reason."

"You will be sorry, you bitch! I am tied so tightly to the authors here that they will all follow me when I leave. I will bring you down slut!" he yells.

"If you even try to take a single author, manuscript or idea with you I will sue you for contract violation. Here is a copy of the contract you signed when SIP was sold; this contract specifically states that should you employment be terminated with SIP you are not permitted to take any authors, publications, manuscripts or employees with you to another publisher. Should you attempt to do, SIP will be entitled to 90% of all profits from that author, manuscript or revenue earned by the former employee. The contract also states that you are not to associate with any of our authors for a period of no less than five years" I say handing him a copy of the signed document.

"You can't do this!" He screams.

"Actually, I can" I say confidently. "You signed the document which is enforceable in a court of law. Now Maurice will escort you to your office to collect your personal belongings. If you step foot in this building or at Seattle E books I will have you arrested for trespassing. If you even attempt to hack into any of my servers again, I will see that you are criminally prosecuted."

"You will be sorry for this; I will see that you pay! No one does this to me! You better sleep with one eye open!" He screams.

"I suggest you follow Maurice out of here before you say something that will allow me to file a police report on the fact that you are threatening me" I say calmly.

"You have no proof" He smirks.

"Actually, I recently had cameras installed" I point to several corners of the room. "This meeting is being recorded."

"You little BITCH!" He screams as he storms out, Maurice following him.

I return to my office, closing the door behind me and taking a few deep breaths. I have only ever had to fire one person before and compared to this that one was a breeze. I get that he was angry since I'm sure he didn't expect me to catch him hacking into our server, but he seemed to make it personal. I try not to think about it too much but I can't help but wonder why he chose to only access my email account and only delete the ones from Christian. Perhaps it was because those were the only personal emails that were sent to me during that time? Whatever the reason, I am thankful for the security at Escala knowing that only the two apartments on my floor have the elevator code so he can't just come to my apartment should he discover where I live.

The rest of my day goes by quickly as I work closely with our IT department on seeing that all bugs that Jack Hyde could have planted are removed. The server is replaced and the security system is upgraded after they consult with the IT department at GEH. Barney, Christian's IT guy, recommended several upgrades and monitoring programs that I decided to purchase so prevent something like from occurring again. I insisted everything occur as quickly as possible to prevent Jack from accessing any other data stored on the server including several manuscripts that are currently in the editing process. With as angry as he is, I wouldn't put it past him to try to sabotage manuscripts that we are currently working on.

I return home at almost 9pm, and immediately realize I forgot to go food shopping again tonight. Sighing I walk into the kitchen to see if I at least have something I could quickly make because the last thing I feel like doing is ordering in and waiting for delivery. I am shocked when I open my freezer to find it filled with not only meats but several pre made dishes each with instructions on how to heat it up. I look in my fridge and find it stocked with lunch meat, cheese, milk, juice, yogurt and several other staple items. My cabinets are also filled with pasta, cereal, coffee, tea, sugar, flour and many other items. It's only when I turn around do I see a note on the encounter:

_Didn't think you would have time today to go food shopping. Please heat up one the meals Gail made tonight –Christian _

Never would I have suspected he would do something like this; I am touched that he thought of me during the day today. Although I know he isn't the one who went shopping for me, I am still in awe that he asked someone to arrange all of this.

_Thank you so much for the food! You didn't have to do this –A _

_You're welcome, I take it you just got home? –C _

_Yes, didn't have any time to shop for food today. Thought I was going to be stuck eating bread for dinner –A _

_I figured you would be too busy –C _

_Long day –A_

_How did your meeting go this morning? –C _

_He denied everything of course, but it's over –A _

_I'd like to see you soon –C_

_You saw me last night for dinner __J__ -A_

_I'd like to see you for something else –C _

_Friday night? –A_

_Yes….meet me here 6pm –C _

_Yes sir –A _

The remainder of the week goes by quickly and I am more thankful than ever for Gail's premade meals, as I find myself working late every night this week. Things have been hectic at work since I fired Jack Hyde; we have been left trying to make sense of his notes on various manuscripts and find all the contact information for his authors. I implement several processes to prevent miscommunication like this from occurring again, but in the meantime we have to sort everything that he was working on out. Before I know it, Friday arrives and I find myself looking forward to seeing Christian tonight. We have talked several times on the phone or through text this week but we both have been working so much we haven't been able to see each other.

_Tonight 6pm, meet me in the room –C_

_Understood sir –A _

Clearly his text is referencing the playroom but he must not want to say it in writing; I wonder if we should come up with some sort of key word that will let the other know? Or maybe a certain day/time set aside for the playroom? I suppose these are things we need to work out as we try to find a balance between our lives and the dom/sub lifestyle. I am gathering up my stuff for the weekend as the printer suddenly calls with an issue. I end up spending an hour on the phone with them before they finally have the information they need to resume printing. I glance at my watch realizing it's after 6 and I'm late meeting Christian. I quickly rush back to Escala and immediately head to Christian's penthouse without stopping at mine. I enter his apartment quickly and find it eerily silent; maybe he isn't home yet? I place my purse and laptop bag on the loveseat in the great room before going upstairs to the playroom.

"You're late" Christian says as soon as I open the door.

I don't say anything; my eyes immediately drop to the floor.

"Answer me" he demands.

"Yes sir, I'm late" I answer.

"Did you not think to call or text me to notify me you were running late?" he asks.

"It slipped my mind sir, I was rushing-" I begin.

"Enough!" he interrupts. "Take off your clothes."

I immediately undress, folding each article of clothing and carefully placing them on the nearby table as he has instructed me to do so many times in the past.

"I think you should be punished for disobeying me, don't you?" He asks staring at my naked body.

"If you think I deserve to be punished sir" I answer without looking at him.

"Do you remember your safe words?" he asks.

"Yes sir" I answer.

"Walk over to the cross" he instructs.

I quickly walk over to the large wooden cross affixed to the wall and stand in front of it awaiting his instruction. He places each of my feet on steps, before placing my hands on bars above my head. I am facing the cross so I can't see what he is doing but I feel him attach metal cuffs to my ankles and wrists. My legs are spread fairly wide apart in this position and I find my sex gushing with liquid as I try to anticipate what he is going to do. He is standing behind me, so close to me I can feel his breath on my neck. His hands roam my entire body, increasing my excitement and the anticipation. Just as his fingers approach my sex, he pulls away leaving me aching for his touch.

"Owwwwwwww" I feel a sharp slap against my ass.

"You will count" he instructs hitting me again.

"One! Two!" I exclaim. "Three!"

"Next time you will remember to notify me if you are running late, won't you?" He says before hitting me again with what I can only think is a riding crop.

"Four! Yes sir!" I cry out.

He continues to hit me until we reach ten at which point he suddenly stops. The riding crop was not very painful; I think it was more embarrassing than painful. My skin is hot and ultrasensitive right now; I hiss as he applies cool oil to my ass massaging it in with his hands. I have no choice but to allow him to do this as I am still strapped to the cross. He unhooks my wrists and my feet before assisting me down from the cross. He leads me over to the bed, instructing me to climb to the middle before he disappears over to the chest against the wall.

"Face me on you knees" he instructs as he sits on the couch facing the bed.

I immediately comply; he takes in my entire body, his eyes roaming from my breasts to my sex. I have never been comfortable having someone look at me naked but with Christian he makes me feel desired. I don't feel like he is staring at me to find flaws in my body, but instead he is looking at me with want and need.

"Play with yourself" he instructs.

I look at him confused; but he doesn't elaborate. Although I've tried to masturbate, I've never been very successful at it – I've never reached an orgasm from it. My hands play with my breasts, pinching my nipples which are hardening under my touch. My eyes close as I picture Christian's hands on my breasts…

"Play with your clit….your sex…." He says breathless.

I open my eyes and watch him taking off his pants and underwear freeing his massive hard erection before he sits back down. Motivated by his arousal, I immediately comply; I separate my folds with my fingers purposely going slow as if I'm putting on a show for Christian. My fingers find my clit and begin lightly rubbing it as my other fingers explore my sex. I slowly push a finger into my core as my thumb continues rubbing my clit. My juices are coating my hand as my I slowly feel an orgasm rising. I know it's not enough to push me over the edge, but it's enough to keep me on edge.

"Don't come…you are not to come" he says.

Opening my eyes, I see him stroking himself while watching me. I add a second finger just as my other hand pinches my nipple causing me to moan. Christian stands up, slowly walking over to the bed watching me closer.

"Use this" he says handing me a pink vibrator.

I pause….I've never used a vibrator on myself.

"Is there a problem?" he asks sternly.

"No sir….I've just….I've never…." I stutter.

"I'm aware of that" he says guiding my hand that is holding the vibrator back to my sex.

I rub the vibrator against my clit and through my folds, soaking it with my juices. I'm nervous but watching Christian stroke himself while sitting on the bed next to me is pushing me to do this. Suddenly I feel the vibrator begin vibrating and realize that Christian must have somehow turned it on remotely. The vibrations feel so good against my clit as I rub it back and forth.

"Put it inside of you, but don't come" he says.

I slowly insert the vibrator inside of me; it feels much different than Christian. It's not as big and this one has bumps all over it which feel so good when it's inside of me. I slowly move the vibrator in and out of me, the bumps rubbing against my insides pushing me closer and closer to the edge. The need is building deep within me and I don't know how much longer I can stave off the orgasm if Christian continues to make me do this. Opening my eyes momentarily, I see Christian stroking himself staring at my sex with passion in his eyes. Seeing how excited he is by my actions nearly push me over the edge and I moan loudly, begging for permission to come but he continues to watch me stroking himself more urgently.

"Don't stop….harder and faster" he instructs.

I whimper but immediately comply, fucking myself as he instructed with the pink vibrator. My eyes are closed tightly as the vision of him masturbating to me pleasuring myself is too much for me. I can still hear him breathing loudly and occasionally groaning as I try to tune everything out. I try to think of things going on at work and not focus on the incredible pleasure I am bringing myself with this toy.

"Stop" He suddenly orders.

I immediately comply and drop the vibrator on the bed below me, thankful for the momentary stop in sensation overload. I open my eyes, finding his eyes full of hunger and passion meeting mine. He slowly moves behind me, pulling my arms forcefully behind my back; holding my wrists with one hand he pushes my chest down against the bed.

"Are you going to remember to contact me if you are going to be late again?" He asks as he rubs his erection through my folds.

"Yes! Yes sir!" I cry out.

Without warning, he slams into me hard continuing to thrust in and out of me forcefully giving my body little time to adjust to him. This is a true punishment fuck; he is focused on his need to control me and for me to surrender to him. He continues to hold my wrists behind my back so there is little I can do but accept the pace he has set.

"Do you want to come?" He asks with gritted teeth.

"Please sir! I need to come…" I beg.

"Do you think you deserve to come?" he asks.

"If you think I have earned it, sir I would like very much to come" I cry out in agony still trying to withhold the orgasm.

"Come only when I do" he directs.

He continues fucking me hard, fast and deep causing me to see stars just before I feel him reach his release inside of. Screaming out loudly, the orgasm rips through me as my knees collapse causing him to nearly fall on top of me on the bed.


	12. Chapter 12

_Author's Note: Sorry for the delay…I hit kind of a block with this story and took me awhile to decide where to go next. This chapter is a little shorter than normal, but I wanted to get it out since I haven't updated in a few days._

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt 12 APOV:**

"Hi" Christian says breathlessly as he lays down next to me.

"Hi" I reply.

"I missed you" he admits. "I missed this."

"Me too" I agree. "It's been a rough couple of days."

"Let's get washed up and grab some dinner, then you can tell me about it" he suggests.

"You may need to carry me to the bathroom" I joke. "I don't know that my legs can hold me."

"My pleasure" he suddenly picks me up bridal style taking me into the attached bathroom.

"Christian, I was joking!" I laugh.

He sets me down just outside the shower before he turns the water on and gestures me into the shower stall. We take a quick shower together in which Christian washes every inch of my body even my hair leaving me feeling pampered and relaxed. As we step out of the shower he dries me off and puts a short silk robe on me. I'm wearing nothing beneath the robe as I did not bring any clothes unsure if the expectation is that I would spend the night or return to my apartment after our scene. We walk down to the enormous kitchen and I'm pleased to discover that no one else seems to be in the penthouse tonight. The robe is not necessarily see through but certainly does leave little to the imagination. Christian takes a dish out of the fridge, heating us a vegetable pasta dish that his housekeeper must have made earlier today.

"Tell me about your week" Christian requests.

"I fired the guy who hacked into my email account which I told you about" I begin. "The rest of the week was spent going through his stuff and trying to figure out where he stored all his files. We have instituted a new back up process in which all information is now stored on a central server however that didn't make our jobs any easier this week. It was a lot of long days and late nights."

"How did he react to being fired?" Christian asks.

"He of course denied everything despite the proof" I answer. "He threatened to take the authors that he has signed with him to another publisher however I reminded him of the contract he signed a matter of weeks ago that prohibited him from doing that."

"That was a very smart move on your behalf," Christian compliments.

"Thanks," I say shyly.

"What are your plans for the weekend?" Christian asks.

"I fly out to New York tomorrow to tie up a few lose ends with the office out there" I answer.

"You're going back to New York?" He asks surprised.

"Only for a few days, I should be back my mid-week the latest" I reassure.

"What time is your flight tomorrow?" he inquires.

"Not until two" I answer.

"Will you spend the night with me?" he asks shyly.

"I would like that" I smile.

Christian tells me about his work week over the rest of our dinner before we retire with wine to the great room. We continue talking, getting to know each other as the night progresses.

"Ana, how do you feel about our arrangement so far? I know it's still new…"Christian barely looks at me.

"Christian, I've really enjoyed our time together over the last week" I reassure him. "It feels like a nice balance between a sub/dom arrangement and a normal relationship. I enjoyed dinner with you the other night but at the same time I enjoyed our playtime tonight."

"Thank you for being honest. Please, you have to tell me if you feel we are spending too much time in one area of our arrangement or if you need something more. I really want this to work" he admits.

"I do too Christian" I smile. "When I was researching BDSM this is what I was envisioning as the end result. I wanted someone who could take that control over in the bedroom or playroom but was someone I could still talk to or have dinner with. I never wanted just a dom/sub relationship with no contact outside of the playroom like some couples have. I need the emotional piece too."

"Let's go to bed" he takes my hand and leads me up the stairs.

"No one has ever shared this bed with me" he says before opening his bedroom door.

In the middle of a room that is probably larger than my living room and master bedroom combined is a large bed covered in a black comforter. While the rest of his apartment looks more like a showcase this is the only room that looks like someone lives here. His bed is made perfectly and there does not appear to be an item out of place anywhere in his room. Beautiful landscape artwork hang on the walls and next to his bed is a small picture of his family. The walls are painted a warm beige, a contrast to the white walls in almost every other room in his apartment.

"You have a gorgeous bedroom Christian" I say in awe.

"Thank you" he replies before turning down the bed.

"Do you mind if I use the bathroom?" I glance around trying to determine which door would lead to a bathroom.

"Right through there" he gestures to the door closest to the bed.

I quickly use the bathroom and decide to use his toothbrush to brush my teeth since I don't have one here and didn't bring one with me. Christian's bathroom is easily half the size of his bedroom, complete with a large walk in shower, double sinks and a jetted soaking tub. For someone who has never had a woman in his bedroom this master bath is definitely designed with a woman in mind. Returning to the bedroom, Christian uses the bathroom quickly before laying in the bed.

"I don't have any pajamas with me" I say.

"I know" he smiles.

I walk to the other side of the bed and slip off the robe just before I crawl into the large soft bed next to Christian. I'm completely naked in this bed; the sheets must be very expensive because I have never felt fabric so smooth and soft before. If I had this bed I would never want to get up; how does Christian not stay in bed all day?

"You're too far away" Christian complains so I inch closer to him.

"Closer" he says as I move next to him.

"Better?" I ask as I'm lying next to him.

"No, closer" he smiles pulling me close to him so there is no space between us. "Roll over."

I roll over and he pulls me tight against him so my back is against his chest. He turned the lights off just as I climbed into bed so it is only now that I realize he is also sleeping without clothes on. He wraps his arm around my waist, holding me close to him and I smile at the thought that I am the only woman who has ever shared this with him. I quickly fall asleep in Christian's arms, the exhaustion from this week setting in. As much as I hate flying, I'm looking forward to wrapping things up in New York next week so this move is finalized once and for all. I need to meet with a few of our vendors and the realtor about our space but expect this to be the only trip to New York.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!" A scream wakes me from a deep sleep in the middle of the night.

I glance around, noting that it's only two in the morning and the room is still pitch dark. Christian's arm is tighter around me than before and it's at that point that I realize it's Christian who screamed moments ago. He is now holding me tightly, whimpering quietly.

"Mommy….please….help me…." He screams out suddenly.

I have to do something, but I'm not sure the best way to handle the situation. I force myself to turn around so I am facing Christian, which is not easy to do given the tight grip he has on my waist. I gently call his name, but I get no response. I know he does not like this chest and back touched which I can only assume has something to do with the nightmare he is currently trapped in. Not wanting to upset him more I run my hands through his hair and press my lips gently against his. He stops whimpering but doesn't seem to wake up. I wrap my leg around his waist pulling him closer to me without touching his back and I try to deepen the kiss by running my tongue along his lips as I hold his head against mine. I feel him tense around me just as he gasps into my mouth, he seems to have woken up from his nightmare. He doesn't say anything but his hands run all over my body as if trying to reinforce that I am truly next to him in the bed and that he isn't still trapped in his nightmare. I don't stop kissing him or holding him close to me; I'm not sure what he needs now but given how tightly he is holding me he seems to need to be close to me.

After a few moments, Christian's tongue joins mine in exploration as he pulls me close to him. His hand finds my breast as he massages it and I feel his erection beginning to respond against my sex. He alternates between pinching and rubbing my nipple, I find myself incredibly turned on by his sudden change in demeanor. Moments ago he was clinging to me as if his life depended on it and now without words he is conveying how much he needs to be close to me. His erection continues to rub against my clit as I feel my juices coating him. He gently pulls me on top of him, his lips never leaving mine as he pushes down against my hips. He easily slides into me causing me to gasp into his mouth at the sudden welcomed full feeling. I put my hands on the bed next to his head, remember not to touch his chest, lifting myself up enough just to rock against him. I slowly move against him, feeling him move in and out of me as his hands guide my motions. After a few moments I increase the pace just as his mouth finds my breast and he sucks hard on my nipple. His hands are grasping my ass hard urging me to follow the pace he wants.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhh" I moan as he bites my nipple gently.

He pulls my lips to his a he holds my ass in mid thrust. He bends he knees and starts thrusting into me, slow at first and then increasing he in pace. The pace is different tonight; it's not hard and fast but more slow and deep. Even when he increases the pace it doesn't compare to some of our previous scenes; tonight seems more about him wanting to feel closer to me than about a release. Even with the slower pace, the orgasm approaches quickly and I find myself on the edge.

"Christian….Oh God…."I moan.

"Come when you can baby, I got you" he says.

This side of Christian is different; he is less controlling and domineering. My breath hitches at his term of endearment but he continues thrusting in and out of me deeply bringing me back to reality. I pull myself slightly above him so Christian's angle changes deep inside of me bringing the orgasm right to the surface. Recognizing my need, Christian's mouth quickly finds my nipple and he sucks it hard in his mouth.

"CHRISTIAN!" I scream as the orgasm rips through me.

"ANA!" Christian calls out finding his release still deep inside of me.

I collapse on his chest as he continues gently moving in and out of me, riding out our orgasms just a little bit longer. He wraps his arms around me, holding me close to him as our breathing returns to normal. I gasp slightly at the realization that I am laying against his chest and that when I was on top of him my chest was often touching his. I don't say anything, unsure if he realizes this and not wanting to force him to answer any questions he is uncomfortable with.

"Thank you" he whispers kissing me on the forehead.

He rolls us over so we are both lying on our sides facing each other without breaking our connection. The look in his eyes is clear; he is begging me not to ask about the nightmare, not to ask why he needed to feel me so close to him. I try to convey to him that I'm here for him without words and settle on kissing him passionately as I run my fingers through his hair. He sighs in contentment, wrapping his arm around my tightly before closing his eyes to go back to sleep. My leg remains wrapped around his waist holding him close to me. I'm a little surprised that he is going back to sleep so quickly and while still inside of me but I don't question it; this must be something he needs right now. Even though as a dom he is supposed to take care of me, I want him to know that when we are not in the playroom I am capable of taking care of him when he needs it. I wrap my arm around his waist, holding him close to me and quickly fall asleep.

I wake several hours later feeling uncomfortable; despite being exhausted I force myself to wake up. Christian is sound asleep next to me, holding me tightly against him which is when I realize what is causing the slightly uncomfortable, slightly odd feeling. Christian has remained inside of me the entire time we were sleeping and now it seems he is getting hard again. Having never experienced this before, I realize it's more of an odd feeling than uncomfortable. Since I was sleeping I obviously wasn't turned on and my body wasn't ready for sex however his body obviously is. I don't think he is fully erect yet, but I can tell he will be there soon as I can feel him continuing to grow inside of me. I don't know if I should wake him up but as I try to move he pulls me tighter against him. I doubt he realizes it but as he pulls me closer to him he pushes me down onto him further so he is deeper inside of me. I am surprised as my body starts to react to this, my breath hitching as my sex tightens around him. This must register with him finally because he again pulls me closer to him this time pushing his up so his now fully erect member is deep within me.

"Good Morning" he says gently thrusting himself into me.

"Hmmmmmmmm….morning" I moan as my lips find his.

His hand finds my breast, massaging it and pinching my nipple as he continues to move in and out of me slowly. Despite the orgasm only hours ago and thinking my body wasn't ready for sex moments ago, I find myself immediately responds to his touch as I feel my juices flow. He sucks on my lips as his hand finds my ass, urging me to move myself against him. Understanding his need, my leg pulls him closer to me as I begin to slowly ride his erection thrusting myself up and down on him.

"Don't stop" he moans. "You feel so good."

Without warning he flips us over, so like last night I am on top of him and again I place my arms next to his head on the bed. He grasps my hips firmly, pushing me down harder and deeper against him with a faster pace. I am moaning loudly as my body is once again on the verge of an orgasm but he doesn't let up.

"Don't come….not yet…." He instructs.

UGH! I'm so close, how can he ask me to hold it? My lips find his once again as I fight to hold off the orgasm; his mouth immediately attacks mine as soon as it is within reach. He lifts me up, slightly above him and holds my hips in place. He slowly moves himself in and out of me; I'm higher than I was last night which allows him to pull almost all the way out before he slams back into me.

"Oh God….." I moan.

"Tell me what you need" he commands.

"I need to come….please….I'm so close" I beg.

"What do you need to come?" he teases.

"Fuck me….please….fuck me" I scream.

"I thought that's what I was doing" he says as he pulls all the way out and suddenly slams into me.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh" I moan. "Yes….please more."

He pulls out slowly and slams into me hard. He repeats this pattern several times, always pulling out slowly before slamming into me.

"Yes…Oh God….I'm close" I moan.

"Not yet" he says lifting me off of him.

I whimper in disappointment and frustration as I suddenly feel empty. I lift myself up giving him a look which causes him to smile before kissing me deeply.

"Don't worry, I'm not done with you yet" he laughs.

"Christian" I whine. "You're not being very fair."

I try to shamelessly grind my sex against his erection but he holds my hips still. He pulls himself up and moves so he is sitting against the headboard of his bed. He motions for me to come closer to him clearly wanting a change in position. I slowly crawl towards him, still on my knees from when abruptly pulled out of me when my orgasm was so close. Just as I reach him, I catch him by surprise taking his rock hard erection still coated with my juices into my mouth. He gasps in surprise as I take him in deep, swallowing him as he hits the back of my mouth.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh Ana" he moans. "Please I want you."

Surprised at his words, I swallow him one more time before straddling him guiding him inside of my sex once again. I grasp the head board behind him, slowly moving up and down against him enjoying the small amount of control I have right now. He moans into my mouth as I increase the pace, his mouth grasping at my nipple whenever it comes within reach as his hands hold my ass firmly.

"Hmmmmmmmmmmmm" I moan as he suddenly pushes me down roughly against him.

He continues to guide me but allows me to set the pace as I move against him bringing myself to the edge once again. We are both moaning loudly and breathing heavy, both clearly close to our own release.

"I want you to come with me" he begs.

"I'm so close Christian…I'm right there" I moan.

"Harder….faster…." he instructs.

"Ohhhhh" he moans as I comply with his demands. "Yes….Ana….don't stop!"

I'm moving so fast and hard against him I don't know how much more I can take before the orgasm is going to come even if he doesn't. I hold it off as long as possible and just when I think I'm going to burs he tells me to come and the orgasm immediately rips through my body. I feel him find his release with me, his hands continue to guide my hips up and down prolonging my orgasm longer.

"Oh God" I sigh resting my head on his shoulder as we both come down from our orgasm.

"I needed to give you something to hold you over when you were are in New York for the next few days" he smiles.

"I think you succeeded" I laugh. "I'm not sure I'm going to be able to walk after all of this."

"Hmmmmmm" he moans. "Then you will have to skip New York and stay in bed with me for the weekend instead."

"I wish" I say.

After a quick shower, Christian lends me a pair of shorts and a shirt to wear before we go to the kitchen for a late breakfast. We make small chat while we eat, never discussing the nightmare or the middle of the night sex that was so different then all the previous times we were together. I don't want to bring it up and embarrass him but I smile in the memory of him needing to feel close to me no matter what the reason. I never achieved an orgasm during sex with my previous partner and I assumed it was because I needed the BDSM component. However, last night had no BDSM and yet I very easily found my orgasm. I'm left thinking maybe it was the connection to Christian that made the difference; perhaps I wasn't as connected before.


	13. Chapter 13

Author's Note: This is the longest chapter yet but I couldn't see breaking it anywhere. Hope you enjoy! Thank you for the continued support and reviews!

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 13 CPOV: **

Ana returns to her apartment a few hours later, declining my offer to drive her to the airport later. I'm disappointed that she will be in New York and if it wasn't for several important meetings at GEH this week I would have insisted on accompanying her on the trip. I had Taylor schedule an appointment with Dr. Flynn later this afternoon, I need to talk to him about what happened last night. I try not to think about it because the whole situation confuses me and I'm not sure what to make of it. I spend most of the morning in my office preparing reports and presentations for the meetings I have this week. Ana texts me to let me know her flight is about to take off so she will be out of contact for a few hours.

Flynn: Nice to see you today Christian.

Christian: Thank you for seeing me on short notice.

Flynn: No problem. What brings you in for an emergency session?

Christian: I think I'm going crazy.

Flynn: (smile) Care to elaborate?

Christian: Ana touched my chest, hell she laid on top of my chest and I didn't notice – in fact I just held her tighter against me. I didn't feel any pain….how could something that has affected me my entire life change so fast? Something must be wrong with me….

Flynn: Start from the beginning Christian. What happened?

Christian: She came over last night as planned and we had a session in my playroom. The session involved a light punishment because she was late and didn't notify me she would be late. The session went well I think; she seemed to enjoy the end result. We had dinner together and then I asked her to spend the night with me.

Flynn: Where did she sleep?

Christian: In my bed with me. I've slept with her once before in the bed in the playroom after a scene, but this was the first time she ever slept in my bed. Neither of us wore pajamas, her because she didn't plan on spending the night and therefore she didn't bring any and me because I wanted to feel her body against mine. Anyway, we fell asleep quickly but….

Flynn: Go on

Christian: (sigh) I had a nightmare. It was the same one I was always have; he was beating me and my mother was sitting on the couch watching. Her eyes were glazed over as if she wasn't even looking at me. I begged her to make him stop, to help me but she did nothing-she just sat there.

Flynn: Christian, we've talked about this several times. She was likely high and unable to respond or even comprehend what you were saying in her current state.

Christian: Damn it, I know! But it doesn't stop the nightmares! (pause) Ana brought me out of the nightmare pretty quickly and I didn't last out at her. She had moved so she was against me and she started kissing me to wake me from the nightmare. It was probably the best thing she could have done because had she touched my chest or my back at that moment I don't know how I would have reacted. When I finally came out of the nightmare, I needed to have her closer to me – I needed to know she was real. I was afraid that this was some twisted part of the nightmare and that I would wake up and she wouldn't be there. Without thinking, I pulled her on top of me; she was lying flat against my front. Her chest was touching me and I didn't even realize it. I know you don't want to hear this part, but we had sex in that position and after we both found our release she collapsed on top of me in exhaustion. Without thinking, I wrapped my arms around her and held her close. It took me several minutes to realize that she was on my chest, touching me where no one has ever been able to touch me before. Well, Mia has always been able to touch me but never without a shirt on. Ana was touching my entire chest, not with her hands but with her body. Maybe it's because it wasn't her hands and that's why it didn't bother me?

Flynn: Had she ever touched your chest or your back before last night?

Christian: No (pause). I….when we were in Taiwan on our last night together we….well we got caught up in the moment and I didn't restrain her hands. I asked her not to touch my chest or my back, which she complied with and come to think of it she has never even tried to touch those areas. In the mist of my nightmare last night, she must have remembered and found other ways to bring me closer to her without touching me there.

Flynn: What happened next?

Christian: When I did realize she was lying on my chest, I gently rolled us onto our sides so that we were still next to each other but she wasn't on top of me. My anxiety had increased a little at the realization that she had been that close to my chest, to my scars but when the panic didn't come I found myself easily relaxed. We fell asleep like that…I thought maybe it was a fluke but then….

Flynn: Go on…

Christian: When we woke up this morning, I decided to recreate the scene from last night to see if I would react the same way (pause).

Flynn: And?

Christian: We had sex again with her in the same position, laying on top of my chest – and I had no response. I mean of course sexually I responded, but there was no panic or pain associated with having her on my chest. I purposely changed positions to see if it was something about her lying on top of me that caused my lack of reaction. Then we were both sitting up, her on my lap…facing me and the panic never came. After….well after….she put her head on my shoulder and her chest was once again against mine. Still no reaction.

Flynn: What do you think caused you to not have a reaction?

Christian: Hell if know! That's why I'm here! Isn't that what I pay you for?!

Flynn: Let me ask you….What is this thing between you and Ana? It doesn't sound like the initial BDSM arrangement that you initially wanted.

Christian: No (sigh) it's not. Not at all. Initially I thought I just wanted the dom/sub arrangement where a sub would come to my apartment on certain days and times for scenes that I planned in my playroom.

Flynn: But now?

Christian: Ana and I talked; neither of us want that. We agreed to try some sort of a mix between a normal relationship and a BDSM arrangement. In the playroom or bedroom, we have a typical dom/sub arrangement but outside of those areas we have a pretty typical relationship. We've had dinner together, we have gotten to know each other and like I said we shared my bed.

Flynn: How does Ana feel about this?

Christian: I asked her last night before we went to bed, I needed to know how she felt about the path we were on since it's new to both of us. She said that she liked the playroom arrangement and having more outside of there. She said she needed the emotional connection outside of the playroom with me.

Flynn: Interesting….It sounds like you both want the emotional connection in addition to the need to control or be controlled in the bedroom.

Christian: What? No, I don't need the emotional connection to Ana. I just need to be able to talk to her and see her on days other than what is predecided for a scene.

Flynn: Christian, let me ask you a personal question. (pause) Last night when she woke you from your nightmare, was the sex different than when you engage in a scene with her?

Christian: Well yes…of course it was.

Flynn: Were you in dom mode at that time?

Christian: (pause) No….I wasn't.

Flynn: And you said earlier that when you woke up, you needed to feel closer to her. Even afterwards you held her close to you, needing again to feel her close to you.

Christian: Yeah, so?

Flynn: Do you think that you were looking for something other than just the physical closeness.

Christian: What are you saying?

Flynn: I'm saying I think you need the emotional piece to and although you don't realize it yet I think you are falling for Ana. I think you feel so strongly for her and trust her not to hurt you that she can touch your chest without fear.

Christian: How could I trust her that much already? I haven't known her that long…hell we have only been back together a short time.

Flynn: Sometimes it's not about how long you have known someone but just how you feel about them.

Christian: It can't just be….just because I have feelings for her she can touch my chest. I love my parents but they can't touch me….that doesn't make any sense!

Flynn: What do you attribute how you felt when Ana touched your chest last night to?

Christian: Damn it! I don't know! (sigh) We do seem to have this connection with each other….we both feel it. I don't know that I would say I'm falling for her though. I don't know how I could trust her that explicitly.

Flynn: Let me ask you this….When you came back from Taiwan, you tried scenes with other subs right?

Christian: Yes, you know I did.

Flynn: And what happened?

Christian: You know what happened….I wasn't able….I couldn't perform….

Flynn: Have you experienced the same thing with Ana?

Christian: No! Of course not.

Flynn: What's the difference between the girls at the club and Ana?

Christian: Everything! She's not them; they're not her.

Flynn: So just like the pain you feel when others touch your chest but not feel when Ana does and your ability to perform with Ana and not the other subs – the common denominator in all this is Ana.

Christian: SHIT!

Flynn: Christian this isn't a bad thing…

Christian: What the hell do I know about feelings and love? I've never let myself get close to anyone besides my family before. What do I do? How do I know if she feels the same way?

Flynn: Deep breaths Christian (pause). Whatever you two are doing it seems to be working…continue it. Address the feelings if they come up, or just let them develop. You don't have to do or say anything right now.

Christian: I guess (sigh).

Flynn: Until next week?

Christian: Yeah.

I leave Flynn's office returning to Escala more confused than ever. Could he be right? Could it be that I'm falling for Ana and that's the reason she could touch me last night and I didn't react? Is it possible that she was only able to touch me because we were in bed together? That maybe I rationalized that she couldn't hurt me because we were in bed together? I try to focus on the reports and presentations that I need for my meetings next week but I can't stop thinking about Ana and what Dr. Flynn said.

The next few days pass slowly and I find myself constantly wondering what Ana is doing and looking forward to the random texts I get from her throughout the day. Finally on Wednesday night she texts me to say she will be flying home Thursday night and should arrive around eight in Seattle. Thankfully this time she agrees to let me pick her up at the airport; if she declined I think I might have just shown up anyway. It's been less than a week since I've seen her but I find myself counting down the hours until I see her again. I've never felt like this before; I don't know if it's because the relationship is so new or if it's because we are both so new to BDSM and are learning everything together.

"Sir?" Taylor interrupts my thoughts.

"Yes Taylor?" I ask.

"The airport has notified me that Ms. Steele's flight has been delayed in New York, it likely won't arrive until much later" he replies.

"Thank you, please keep me updated" I say disappointed.

I try to focus on my reports and finally begin to make progress when my phone goes off a couple hours later with a text from Ana.

_Flight is delayed __L__ -A _

_I heard –C_

_Probably won't get home until after ten or eleven. Don't pick me up, I will take a cab –A_

_I don't mind picking you up; it's not too late –C_

_No, I don't want you to have to come out that late plus it might get delayed again. The rain here is horrible –A_

_Can I see you tomorrow? –C_

_I was hoping to –A_

_If you can't get a cab or change your mind, call me. I don't care the time –C_

_I will –A_

_Have a safe flight –C_

_See you tomorrow –A_

**Ana's POV:**

The flight home is horrible; the turbulence lasts for several hours as we seem to follow the storm out of New York. I try to sleep on the plane but of course with all the turbulence it is impossible. I ended up having to spend a couple extra days in New York that I was not counting on because some of some of the red tape I encountered switching our vendor contracts to Seattle. Plus I had to sit through multiple inspections on our office space that is being sold. I should have sent Stacy out here to handle this but I didn't feel right asking her to come back here when I called her to Seattle early. Had I not requested she fly out early she would be here to handle all of this and would have then joined me in Seattle.

Hours later we finally land in Seattle, after waiting for nearly an hour I discover that the airline lost my luggage. Thankfully I had my laptop and important paperwork on board with me so all that was lost was my clothing that I had brought along. I decide to call the airline in the morning rather than try to file a claim tonight after seeing several other people already in line at the customer service counter. I make my way to ground transportation, find a cab and finally head back to Escala. After such a long couple of days in which I rarely slept all I really want to do is crawl into my bed and sleep until at least mid day tomorrow. I have already informed everyone at SIP and Seattle E Books not to expect me in tomorrow given the late flight tonight and the extra days spent in New York. Luckily I was able to handle most tasks while in New York and my appointments for tomorrow can easily be rescheduled to next week.

Finally reaching my apartment door, I realize the door is unlocked which is concerning because I know for a fact that it was locked before I left on Saturday. I purposely checked the door twice before leaving to insure it was locked. Maybe Christian was waiting for me inside? I smile at the thought that he would surprise me and be waiting in my apartment instead of having to wait until tomorrow to see him. I found myself constantly thinking of him when I was away; wondering what he was doing, wondering if he was thinking of me and recalling our last night together. I have no idea how he feels about me but I can easily see myself falling in love with this man in more time.

I walk into my apartment hoping to see Christian waiting for me and instead I'm stunned at what I see. My apartment has been ransacked and is now a complete disaster. My couch is turned over, my dishes are shattered all over the floor, decorative pillows are slashed open, my television is on the floor in pieces and there is what appears to be red paint thrown all over the walls. I stand there in complete shock until I hear a noise in the bedroom; afraid someone is still here I run out of the apartment back to the elevator. Without thinking, I enter the code to Christian's penthouse quickly sighing in relief when the elevator doors close. A couple minutes later the elevator doors open and I am in Christian's foyer alone….I begin second thinking my decision to come here and not just call the police given how late it is. My first thought was Christian and not the police. I fumble through my purse trying to find my phone as it all spills out across the beautiful marble floor of Christian's foyer.

"Ms. Steele?" Taylor comes running from somewhere. As I look up I see him putting his gun back in the holster…he likely thought I was an intruder.

"Taylor…I….I'm sorry it's late" I mumble.

"Ms. Steele, what's wrong?" he asks concerned.

"My apartment….someone is there" I say.

"Grey!" Taylor yells loudly.

"Taylor what….Ana what are you doing here?" Christian opens his office door.

"Stay with her" Taylor orders before getting on the elevator.

"Ana, what happened" Christian lifts me up off the floor where I was still sitting trying to gather my purse items.

"Someone was in my apartment" I say scared.

"Come sit down" he leads me to the great room.

"What happened?" he asks.

"When I got home my door was unlocked, I know it was locked before I left on Saturday" I begin. "I thought maybe you were waiting for me inside, but when I opened the door I discovered that someone destroyed my apartment. Everything was turned over, broken or shattered; paint was splattered all over my walls. I heard someone or something in my bedroom and I ran. I should have called the police but all I could think about was coming here. I'm sorry…it's so late. I should have –"

"Ana, that's enough" Christian says in his dom voice. "This is not your fault, I'm glad your first thought was to come here. It means you feel safe. Taylor will take care of contacting the police and will see that everything is repaired or replaced."

"Thank you" I sigh leaning back on the couch as I finally come down from the adrenaline rush, but then panic sets in.

"Oh my God Christian, someone was in my apartment! What if I went in further? Do you think they were waiting for me? What could they have wanted from me? Why me?" I sob.

"Ana, stop baby. We will get to the bottom of this" Christian says calmly.

"Grey" Christian answers his phone as I begin to pace in front of the fireplace.

"Yes….make sure a report is filed….good….the cameras better of caught the fucker who did this…Yes…first thing in the morning" Christian disconnects the call.

"Taylor didn't catch him?" I ask.

"No, he was gone by the time Taylor arrived" Christian says.

"What am I going to do? I need to replace everything! Do you think it was random or was I targeted? How did he get onto my floor? How did he get into my apartment?" I ask.

"Ana, we will answer all these questions in the morning. We will meet first thing with Taylor, Welsh and Barney to see what we can come up with" Christian says. "Let's try to get some sleep."

"Sleep? I can't possible sleep now! Not knowing that someone has gone through my things! Oh my god, he probably went through my underwear….Ew! Oh God, I need to replace everything in my room…" I cry.

"Ana, enough" The dom voice has returned.

"Christian, I can't help it. How would you feel if someone went through your stuff? Ruined your home? Destroyed your personal property?" I ask angrily. "Your world would be spinning out of control just like mine is right now."

"Get upstairs into the playroom now!" he orders.

"What no! Christian…now is not the time-" I complain as he takes my wrist forcefully and leads me upstairs.

He unlocks the playroom, forcefully moving me inside the room before locking the door behind us. How could he even think I feel like playing right now? With everything going on, he thinks I want sex? Is he crazy?

"As your dom, you are to trust me to know what you need and when you need it even when you don't think you need it correct?" he glares at me.

"Yes but-" I answer.

"No, but. Take off your clothes now" he orders.

"Christian….please…I have too much going on right now…I need to-" He cuts me off by slapping my ass hard.

"I said take off your clothes" he orders.

I sigh in defiance but slowly remove all of my clothing as he ordered. Although I don't see how this is helping me right nor or is about what I need I remind myself that he is in charge. The entire dom/sub relationship is built on the assumption that the dom knows what the sub needs and that she trusts him enough to give it to her. While I trust Christian one hundred percent, I don't see how tonight is about what I need.

"Do you remember your safewords?" he asks as he walks around my body taking me in.

"Yes sir" I answer with a tone of defiance.

"I'm going to ignore the tone in your voice right now as I know you don't think you need this" he says.

"Now, I want you to think about the last night we were together…" he instructs. "Do you remember it?"

"Yes sir" I say breathless.

Immediately I recall the night we shared his bed; the incredible passion from that night. Although his nightmare was concerning the connection I felt to him that night…words cannot describe. It was as if he needed me which is like nothing I have ever felt before. The sex that night was different, it wasn't about control it was as if we were trying to tell each other what we couldn't find words to say.

"Are you getting wet thinking about it?" he whispers in my ear.

"Yes sir" I admit.

"Are you thinking of the playroom or my bedroom?" he asks.

"Your bedroom sir" I answer.

"I can't tell you how many times I have thought about you when you were gone" he admits. "I liked waking up inside of you that morning."

"Me too" I blush.

Christian comes in front of me, capturing my mouth in his as his arms wrap around my body. I feel his erection through his pants as he pushes my sex against him. My arms wrap around his neck, tugging his hair to pull him closer as his tongue enters my mouth. His hand reaches between us, finding my now drenched sex as he runs a finger through my slit causing me to moan loudly.

"You will stay with me until we figure out who did this and he is behind bars. Understood?" he asks as he rubs my clit.

"But….what if you don't find me?" I ask in fear.

"You let me handle that…until then you stay with me" he says.

"But-" I begin.

"No but. I said you stay with me until he is caught" he says sternly as he pushes his finger deep inside of me.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh" I moan his action catching me by surprise.

"Tell me you will stay with me" he says moving his finger slowly in and out of me.

"Yes Christian, Yes I will stay here" I moan as his thumb finds my clit.

"Very good" he says removing his finger from me.

"Christian, please I've agreed to staying here but I still have so much to take care of. I need to call the police, I need to call my home owner's insurance-" I begin.

_Wack_ His hand comes down hard on my ass.

"I said enough! Not another word about what happened earlier or you will be punished" he informs me.

"But-" I say.

_Wack_ Another hard slap to my ass.

"Understood?" He asks.

"Yes" I glare at him.

"Go lay on the bed, on your back" he instructs.

I immediately comply although I do not like that he is pulling me away from what I need to do. I begin making a mental list of everything I need to do tomorrow and what needs to be replaced. There is no way I'm keeping any clothing or bedding; God only knows what a sick pervert might have been doing in my room or touching. As I'm lost in my thoughts I feel Christian join me on the bed and place a blind fold over my eyes. My arms are attached to the bed frame above my bed with soft hand cuffs and I tug on them finding they have very little give. My ankles are attached to something cold and metal; they are spread wide apart before I hear something click into place. I try to move my legs closer together but discover this is impossible with my legs attached to this metal thing. He places a firm pillow or cushion of some type under my lower back which lifts my sex up from the bed.

"Tell me…did you touch yourself while you were in New York?" he asks.

"No sir" I blush deeply.

"Good" he says. "Your orgasms belong to me. You are not to touch yourself or make yourself come without my permission. Is that understood?"

"Yes sir" I cry as he lips attach harshly to my nipples.

"Who do you belong to Ana?" he asks as his hand finds my sex.

"You sir! Only you!" I cry out as he puts the slightest pressure on my clit.

"Good, very good" He sounds pleased.

I feel him get up from the bed and rustle around with a few things. I can't tell what he is doing but I hear drawers open and close as well as clothing rustling around. I give up trying to determine what he is doing and concentrate on the fact that I am giving up control right now. I try to forget about everything going on which I suppose is the entire point Christian is trying to make even if I think it's pointless because when we leave here I still need to take care of everything. I feel him return to the bed and drop several items next to me. I'm dying to know what he has planned and what is on the bed, but I know it's not my place to ask.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh" I feel an oil drip on my breasts, catching me by surprise.

His hands rub the oil over my entire breasts; the oil is initially cool but as he rubs it around I can tell it's some type of warming oil. My breasts soon feel like they are on fire, they don't hurt but they're very uncomfortable. His hands leave my breasts as I feel him move items around on the bed. I feel myself getting turned on at not knowing what is coming next or what he has planned for tonight. I feel his fingers separate the folds of my sex just before something cold is pushed inside of me.

"Ohhhhhh" I moan at the sudden coldness.

His one hand returns to my breasts, alternating between the two but insuring that the oil is always hot by constantly rubbing it in. His mouth captures mine as his other hand explores my sex, careful not to enter me where the dissolving ice cube lays inside of me. The combination of heat on my nipples, the pressure on my clit and the coldness inside of me is quickly pushing me to the edge.

"Come when you can…." He says before sucking hard on my lips.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh God!" I moan as he pinches my nipple hard.

His assault on my nipples, my clit and my mouth continue which only intensifies everything I feel. The orgasm rushes to the surface and I scream as it I finally find my release. The force of the orgasm pushes the cold liquid of me and I feel it running down my ass as I come down from the orgasm. Christian uses a warm cloth to wipe the oil off my chest and finally the burning subsides.

_Wack_ I feel the flogger come down on my chest.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhh" I moan as he hits me again, this time focusing on my sex.

Christian continues hitting me with the flogger, alternating the spots that he hits so I never know what to expect. The flogger doesn't hurt; it brings the blood to the surface and makes everything ultra-sensitive, he gently blows on my skin which is almost painful on my overly sensitive skin. After spending several minutes focused on my breasts I sigh in relief when he finally stops; however my relief is brief as the flogger lands on my sex.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh" I say as it lands directly on my clit.

"Do you like it?" he asks bringing it down gently again on my clit.

"Yes…Oh yes…." I moan.

This continues for several minutes before I hear the flogger drop to the floor. I only ponder what he is going to do next for a few seconds before I feel his mouth on my over sensitive sex. The feeling is intensified so much from the flogging, I immediately find myself on the brink of an orgasm within seconds of his mouth on me. As soon as his tongue enters me I combust around him, screaming his name as I come hard and fast.

"Oh God" I sigh as I come down from my second orgasm in a very short period.

I feel the bed shift, he seems to be moving above me which is confirmed when I feel his knees against my arms.

"Open" he commands.

I immediately comply, opening my lips to find his awaiting erection. I have no control in this position, my hands remain cuffed to the bed above my head; I rely on him to control the movements. I feel him ease himself deeper inside of me, slowly until he hits the back of my throat. I briefly panic but force myself to remember that I trust Christian enough to know that he won't hurt me; that he won't let me choke or stop breathing. I swallow against him which pushes him a little further down my throat; he doesn't pull out right away but I remember his previous instruction to breathe through nose. He pulls back slowly before thrusting in and out of my mouth as I suck him. When I least expect it he pushes himself in deeply until he reaches the back of my throat. Every time he does this, I swallow against him and I am rewarded with a moan from him. His pace is picking up, his breathing is more rapid; I can tell by this change that he is getting close.

"Don't stop Ana….God don't stop" he begs as he continues to thrust in and out of my mouth.

"Oh God!" He says as I swallow against him.

"ANA!" he comes while deep in my throat, I struggle to swallow quickly around him taking everything he has to offer.

He pulls up slightly, leaving himself in my mouth but not as deep. I continue sucking him, milking every last drop of his release out of him. I feel him become soft in my mouth, but he doesn't pull out. I continue sucking him for what feels like several minutes if not longer before I feel him harden in my mouth. This man seriously cannot expect to come again so quickly? My question is answered as he becomes fully erect once again and is deep in my throat.

He reaches up, unhooking my arms from the cuffs while staying inside of my mouth. I feel him moving the cuffs around but can't concentrate on what he is doing when I'm sucking on his erection. My arms are cuffed again to the bed but this time one is on top of the other and there is much more slack between them. He pulls out of my mouth suddenly and moves to the bottom of the bed. The blind fold is still on so I have no idea what he is doing now. My legs are uncuffed from whatever item they were previously attached to but the cuffs remain on my ankles.

"Turn over on your stomach" he commands sternly; I immediately comply.

"On your knees, head on the bed" he requests.

My legs are attached again to some metal bar at the end of the bed, this time not as far apart though. He reaches above my head and tights the chain that my arms are attached so I can barely move my arms. In this position I realize my ass and sex must be on full display for him; I try bringing my thighs together however because of the metal bar I am unable to move them.

"Ahhhhhhhh" the flogger once again finds my body.

Christian hits my back, thighs, ass and sex with the flogger focusing on no specific area. This continues for several minutes before he moves his focus to my ass, my sex and my thighs. I find myself once again on the brink of an orgasm as everything is intensified from the flogging.

"Oh God!" I moan.

A few moments later the flogging stops and I find myself more turned on than ever before. I can feel the juices flowing down my thighs; I know the slightest touch will send me over the edge. Gone from my mind is everything that happened earlier this evening and everything that I need to take care of for my apartment. The only thing I am thinking about right now is how I can achieve my next orgasm. I feel the bed shift and hear the flogger once again falling to the floor before Christian climbs back onto the bed. The anticipation of what is going to happen has me that much more on edge; I can't see anything and can't tell from the sounds what he is going to do. I feel a cool oil drip on my lower back and ass before it slowly begins to drip down to my sex. I immediately worry that it's going to heat up like before once Christian starts touching it; I don't know that I could handle that with my skin being so sensitive right now. Much to my relief, when he begins rubbing the oil it does not warm up and I begin to relax enjoying the gentle massage. He moves the oil all over my back; every time he moves forward to reach my shoulders or my upper back I feel his erection rub against my sex. I can't move but if I could I would be trying to push myself against him trying to get him to enter me.

His hands continue their work all over my back before finally finding my sex. He massages the oil around my sex and around my ass. I am so turned on, I'm moaning every time his fingers come near my sex. His fingers toy with my clit, rubbing and pinching it before quickly moving to another area. I feel him move things around on the bed again but I'm too turned on to care as his one hand continues rubbing my clit. It's not enough to make me come but it keeps me right on the edge.

"Please…I'm so close" I beg.

"Soon" he promises before pinching my clit again.

"Ahhhhhhhhh" I moan.

I find myself trying to buck against his hand, trying to get him to enter me even if it's only with his fingers as I'm so close. I don't know how long I can stay on the edge like this but I know when I come it's going to be hard and probably the biggest orgasm I've ever had. I feel more oil being poured on my ass, again it drips slowly down to my sex.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh" I moan as his finger rubs my anus while the other remains firm on my clit.

"Do you like this?" he asks, pushing just the tip of his finger in.

"Hmmmmmmm" I moan in embarrassment. I don't want to admit that what he is doing could very well push me over the edge.

"Do you want me to make you come like this?" he asks pushing his finger in further.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh" I moan louder.

"Tell me" he pinches my clit.

"Yes! Please….I need to come!" I beg.

"Like this?" he moves his finger in and out of my ass, this time moving in deeper.

"Oh God yes! Please I need to come!" I scream as I feel the orgasm approaching.

He suddenly slams his erection into my soaking set and I scream as the orgasm rips through my body. It was as hard as I feared it would be as I see stars before my eyes. The orgasm just doesn't seem to stop as Christian continues to slam into me while his finger mimics the act on my sex. I suddenly feel him remove his finger and I moan in disappointment as it was prolonging the orgasm.

"Relax for me" he says just before I feel a cool solid object against my anus.

"Christian?" I ask unsure of what he is doing.

"Relax baby, I'm going to have you screaming my name again in minutes" he promises.

I take a deep breath and force my body to relax which isn't too difficult with Christian's other hand rubbing and pinching my clit. Suddenly I feel the cool object enter my ass, I tense up but my body defies me by relaxing the moment Christian pinches my clit. He holds the object partially inside of me as begins to move in and out of my sex. Despite the unfamiliar and somewhat uncomfortable feeling in my ass, I find my body readying itself for another orgasm. My breathing hitches, my sex is flooded with juices in excitement as Christian begins to slam into me hard.

"Oh God" I moan.

"Don't come until I tell you" he warns.

His hand continues to rub my clit but his other hand doesn't move the object from my ass. His hand leaves my clit, slowly moving his way up to my breasts, pinching my nipples causing me to moan loudly and more fluid to flow throughout my sex. He continues his focus on my nipples as he continues to gently move in and out of my sex. Once again, it's not enough to make me come but it's enough that I'm edge despite my earth shattering orgasm moments ago.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" I say as he pushes the object into my ass further.

"Relax baby" he says moving slowly inside of me.

"I can't….it's…." I moan.

"Does it hurt?" he asks moving himself slowly in and out of me while returning his attention to my clit.

"No…I don't know" I admit, my face blushing deeply as I'm suddenly thankful for the mask so I can't see him looking at me.

"You trust me right?" He asks.

"Yes Christian! Yes" I moan as he pinches my clit hard.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh" I say as he pushes the final part of the item into my ass.

"Relax, take a few deep breaths" he instructs.

Easy for him to say, there's not an item stuck up his ass! It doesn't hurt, it's more like the worst thong you have ever worn being stuck up your ass and not being able to take it out I realize. The hand that was holding the item in my ass suddenly moves and is now playing with my breasts. In that moment I realize I am holding this item in myself somehow, which is odd to know considering how uncomfortable I'm finding it. I try to remind myself that as the dom Christian knows what he is doing and what I need but right now I'm struggling trying to understand why I need this item up my ass!

"Are you okay?" he asks as he begins moving.

"Oh my God!" I moan.

As he moves in and out of me, he rubs against my g spot every time. I feel so full and so turned on right now I'm struggling to think straight. Christian grasps my breasts with both hands, his fingers pinching my nipples as he continues to thrust deep inside of me hitting that spot. He is so deep inside of me in this position, the combination of everything has me teetering on the edge yet again. I am shocked at how my body is reacting; I never thought I would enjoy anal play, the entire thought of it was a turn off for me in the past. However, now my body clearly has other ideas. Christian leans down so his chest is against my back as he slowly thrusts in and out of me causing the thing in my ass to move around as well.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh" I moan at the new feeling of this item moving within me.

"Does it feel good?" he whispers in my ear pushing himself further into and the item further into my ass.

"Oh God….it shouldn't….but it does" I moan in embarrassment.

"One day I'm going to take you here" he says thrusting into me deeper.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh" I moan as I feel it move further into me.

I am so full, so turned on right now I cannot comprehend what he just said. I can't imagine how it would feel to have him fuck me there but I find myself turned on by thought.

"You're thinking about it, aren't you?" he whispers.

"Hmmmmmmm" I whimper not wanting to admit.

He grasps my hips and begins slamming into me hard several times before his hand begins moving the items in and out of my ass.

"Ahhhhhhh" I moan.

"Tell me….You're thinking me taking you like this aren't you" He asks.

"Ohhhhhhhh" I moan fighting back the orgasm which is threatening to rip through me.

"Tell me and I will make you come" he orders.

"Yes….Yes! That's what I'm thinking!" I admit in embarrassment.

"One day" he says pinching my clit tightly.

He continues slamming into me hard, hitting my g spot every time he enters and every time he pulls out. The slightest movement of the item in my ass brings me closer to the edge and I know I'm going to lose my battle with the orgasm if he doesn't let me come soon.

"Christian….I'm so close! Please…"I beg

"Come Ana!" He slams into me again as he pushes the item further into my ass.

"CHRISTIAN! OH GOD!" I scream as the entire room momentarily goes black and silent.

"ANA!" I hear Christian scream as he finds his release deep inside of me.

He continues stays deep inside of me, gently moving as my walls continue to tremble around him. After so many orgasms, my body is exhausted and can barely move. I feel Christian pull out of me a few moments later before cleaning me up with a warm washcloth. He unhooks my legs and arms before pulling off the blindfold. I immediately collapse onto the bed, my muscles sore and my body completely without energy.

"Hi" he whispers.

"Hey" I moan without opening my eyes.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

"Tired…very very tired" I say seeing his eyes full of concern.

Christian kneels against my legs, gently rubbing my arms, my back, my ass and my thighs. I sigh in comfort just before I feel his hands separate my ass cheeks. I look at him confused, there is no way my body can handle anything else tonight. It's only then that I realize whatever he put in me is still inside me; in the mist of the massive orgasm I'm shocked to learn that I forgot it was in me. Christian gently pulls the item out and I see him put a small thin object on the nightstand.

"It's a butt plug" he explains.

"Oh" I blush.

"Let's go to bed" he says.

"Okay" I agree wanting to fall asleep right here.

Christian brings me the same silk robe I wore the last time I was here and he assists me in putting it on. He carries me down the hall to his bedroom which is good because I'm not sure I could walk right now even if I wanted to. I can't believe how many times I came tonight, and how hard the last two orgasms were. Even though I didn't realize it, I can now see that Christian knew exactly what I needed. I needed to calm down and look at everything when I was calmer instead of reacting in the moment.

"Christian?" I ask as he lays me on the bed.

"Yes?" he asks uncertain.

"Thank you" I say.

He quickly gets into bed and holds me close to him.

"I didn't know what to do" he admits. "I knew you were coming down from the adrenaline rush and that you were going to crash if something didn't stop the quick drop in adrenaline."

"I think this definitely did it" I smile.

"I don't want you to worry, but Taylor has filed the police report, notified Escala that your locks and codes need to be changed and notified your home owner's insurance. Taylor will have a copy of all security cameras in the building by morning and we will be able to see what happened" he explains.

"He did all of this?" I ask surprised.

"Yes, I was trying to tell you earlier not to worry but you couldn't listen" he says.

"Thank you for knowing what I needed" I kiss him deeply.


	14. Chapter 14

_Author's Note: I had a couple comments related to the way Christian handled the situation in the last chapter that I would like to address:_

_ * He "forced" her into the playroom: technically yes, he did. However shortly after entering the room he reminded her of her safe words which was her out. She chose to participate in the scene.  
* He explains why he handled the situation the way he did at the end of the chapter; he told her he didn't know what else to do. Was this how a seasoned dom would have handled the situation? Probably not, however it was what he thought she needed.  
* This story is about exploring BDSM and their relationship. There are going to be times when one of them screws up, makes a mistake or acts like a typical dom/sub should not. This is part of the learning curve. Both are new to the lifestyle and to have had no previous long term BDSM relationships.  
* To the guest that said that Ana and Christian can't have a BDSM relationship and a romantic one, I ask why not? Christian is not a cruel, harsh dom who wants control 24/7. Also, neither of our characters have signed a contract, rules have not been formally established except for those that they have agreed to verbally thus far (monogamy, orgasms). As I mentioned, these characters are exploring the BDSM lifestyle as well as their romantic relationship together. At this point no one has said they love each other…when/if they do will that necessarily complicate things? It depends on where you think their BDSM lifestyle is going….try to separate the book Christian from my Christian. _

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 14 CPOV**

I wake up before Ana the next morning, not that I'm surprised considering everything she went through last night. It was a bold move on my part to force her into the playroom but I knew that if something didn't change she would crash hard. She wasn't listening to reason; I tried telling her that Taylor was taking care of everything but she just kept listing all the things she needed to do.

"No….Please get out" Ana mumbles in her sleep.

Ana hasn't discussed much of her childhood, but I got the impression it was pretty normal. She hasn't spoken much about her mother but I know she was close to her father.

"Don't! Please…..get out of my room!" she yells.

"Ana! ANA!" I call as I shake her shoulders.

"Oh Christian…."she says breathless looking around the room.

"What happened?" I ask.

"I was dreaming that instead of turning around and coming up here last night I found the guy in my bedroom…" she shudders at the thought.

"Oh, Ana" I pull her close to me, her chest once again against mine.

"I don't want to go back there Christian" she whispers.

"Shhhhhh….I meant what I said last night" I lift her chin up so she is looking at me. "You are staying right here with me until we find the bastard who did this. Until he is behind bars this is where you will be sleeping every night."

"Are you sure? I don't want to impose…." She sighs.

"Ana, I won't have you anywhere but here where I can keep you safe" I say kissing her still swollen lips.

"I could sleep in the guest room-" she begins.

"No! Why? Don't you want to sleep in here?" I ask concerned. Maybe I'm pushing it too fast; maybe I'm just assuming she would want to sleep with me.

"It's not that! I like sleeping with you" she reassures me. "I just didn't want you to feel you had to sleep with me if you didn't want to."

"Oh baby" I sigh. "I'm getting hard just thinking about waking up next to your naked body every day, waking up inside of you, waking you up in the middle of the night to play."

"Christian" she blushes.

"I'm going to keep you safe; I promise you that you will be safe here" I vow to her.

She looks up at me with this innocent look in her eyes that I've never seen before. It's as if she is begging me to keep her safe, to not let anyone hurt her. I can see the battle in her mind, struggling with the idea that I can protect her and wondering how that will happen. I can almost watch the wheels start to rapidly turn in her head trying to figure it all out.

"Let's go take a shower, we need to meet with everyone at GEH this morning" I say.

"At your office?" she asks.

"Yes, that's where we have the best imaging programs to tackle the security cameras" I answer.

"I don't have any clothes with me…my luggage was lost-" she explains.

"Taylor had clothes delivered this morning for you from Nieman's" I interrupt.

"Oh, thank you. I don't want to even think about what was done to my clothes last night" she sighs in relief. "I will reimburse you the cost of everything."

"No you won't" I say firmly as we get in the shower. "We will order more items as you need them."

"Thank you" she kisses me on the lips.

"But we won't be ordering pajamas" I smile.

"None?" she raises an eyebrow.

"None….I only want you naked in my bed" I say.

"Only if the same rule applies to you" she giggles.

As much as I would love to spend all day with Ana in the shower I know we need to get moving so we can meet with Taylor, Barney and Welsh to see what we can find. Ana is disappointed when I don't offer to wash her beautiful body, but I assure her that we will have plenty of showers with her staying here. The offer to stay here was spontaneous last night but thinking about it now I don't want her anywhere else. I want to do everything in my power to keep her safe; I can't have someone running around breaking into her apartment. What if she were there when he broke in? When she offered to sleep in the guest room this morning my heart immediately sunk at the thought of her anywhere else in my bed. Realizing this, I'm beginning to wonder if Dr. Flynn wasn't onto something in our meeting last week. I wonder if I am falling hard for her; could she be falling hard for me? Will that complicate things?

"I brought some clothes that Taylor had sent over, if you don't like them I can pick something else out…" I say as Ana comes out of the bathroom in a towel.

"It's fine Christian" she assures me.

"I'm going to have Gail move everything into my closet so you won't have to wonder the halls in a towel" I smile.

"I don't mind moving everything" she says.

"It's okay….let's get going" I reply.

We eat a quick breakfast that Gail prepared for us, neither of us saying anything. Taylor drives us to GEH and immediately I can see the shock in Ana's eyes as she takes in the size of the building. I am always amazed when someone sees it for the first time; usually you can almost see the dollar signs flashing before their eyes. With Ana though it's different, she is looking up at the building in surprise and in awe. Ana is not like the other woman I tried dating before turning to BDSM; they all were after my money. They would play it off like they didn't know who I was initially but it always came out later that they knew exactly who I was and only wanted me for my money.

"You own this building?" she asks in awe.

"Yes" I confirm.

"Wow, it's huge" she says.

"It is" I laugh. "Come on."

"Taylor please have everyone in the board room as soon as possible" I say as take the elevator to the executive floor.

"Yes sir" he confirms.

"One day I want to fuck you in here" I whisper into Ana's ear as I show her my office.

"I'd like that" she smiles. "I'd also like to suck you off while you are on a conference call."

"You're killing me Ana" I groan feeling dick twitch at the thought.

"Soon" she promises.

"Sir? Everyone is gathered in the board room" Taylor says through the intercom.

"Are you ready?" I lift her chin so she is looking at me.

"Yes, let's find out who this bastard is" she says confidently.

I kiss her gently on the lips before taking her hand and leading her down the hall to the board room. I hear Andrea gasp as I walk past her and I realize that I've never held hands with a woman in my office before. Occasionally I would have a date meet me here for lunch or dinner but we would also leave the office and never show any signs of affection. With Ana it's different; it's almost as if I can't keep my hands off of her.

"Ana, I would like to introduce you to my team" I say as we walk into the room. "Barney is my head IT guy whom you've spoken to previously, Welsh is my head of security at GEH and of course you know Taylor."

"Thank you all for assisting me today, I appreciate you taking time out of your busy schedules" she greets everyone.

I'm momentarily taken back with the change in Ana when she walked into this room. I've seen myself do it but watching her change into CEO Ana is freaking hot. She walked in the room as if she owned it even though she was out of her comfort zone. Her body is oozing confidence as she sits straight up in the chair next to me.

"Okay gentleman what do we know" she asks.

"The person who broke into your apartment is a Caucasian male, appearing in his late thirties to early forties from the images we can gather. He disguised himself as a delivery person, gaining access to the service elevator from someone who was working in another apartment. It's not clear how he gained access to your elevator code but he is seen exiting the elevator on your floor. We don't believe he knew there were cameras in the building because he made minimal attempt to hide from them. He then picked your lock in a matter of seconds before entering your apartment" Welsh describes.

"Inside the apartment you already know that he destroyed most of your possessions in your living room, shattered your kitchen dishes and most of your appliances. Did you enter your bedroom?" Taylor asks, and Ana shakes her head. "Please excuse my bluntness, but the images in there were the most disturbing. He took out most of your undergarments from your dresser and put them on your bed before pleasuring himself on them."

"Oh God" Ana mumbles. "I think I'm going to be sick."

"Gentleman, give us a minute" I say escorting Ana back to my office.

"There's a rest room-" I gesture towards the door but before I finish she takes off.

I hear her lose her breakfast and my heart sinks knowing the images that must be going through her head. I open the bathroom door, kneeling next to her rubbing circles on her back. I whisper to her telling her that everything is going to be okay, trying to convince her that she is safe. She nods before rising and walking towards the sink. I hand her my extra toothbrush that I keep in there so she can feel better before walking back into the meeting.

"Are you okay?" I ask as we walk out of the bathroom.

"I'm okay" she says confidently.

"We don't have to-" I begin.

"Yes we do, I need to catch this bastard" she says, CEO Ana returning.

"Gentleman, I apologize for leaving abruptly" Ana says entering the board room again. "Now, where were we?"

"The red paint that I'm sure you saw in your living room" Taylor begins and Ana nods. "Was throughout most of your apartment. Any mirrors have been smashed, your office was torn apart although it didn't look like most of the books were ruined – just thrown around. Several windows were broken and the electricity had been cut to your apartment."

"That explains why it was so dark when I opened the door" Ana says. "I could only see the damage in the living room and kitchen because of the light in the hallway. I always leave the kitchen light on when I leave so that I don't come home to a dark apartment."

"A police report has been filed, here is the name of the detective assigned to the case" Taylor says handing Ana a business card. "They would like a statement from you but agreed to wait until early next week seeing that you never saw the person in your apartment. Your home owner's insurance will be sending out someone to determine a claim adjustment in the next week. We have contracted with a cleaning crew that has assured me they can have the place looking brand new as soon as the insurance company is done with their assessment."

"Thank you Taylor" Ana smiles. "I appreciate you taking over last night."

"We have one decent image of the guy from the security cameras" Barney begins. "Several are blurry and others are from his side or his back. But there is one fairly decent shot of his front, however it is slightly blurry. He is wearing a dark hat which casts a shadow over his face and as well as a hooded sweatshirt which I believe disguises much of his stature."

"Please bring up the image" Ana instructs.

"This is the best one we have" Barney says clicking a button moments before a picture appears on the projector screen.

Barney was right; the image is blurry and dark. The bastard who did this was smart enough to at least try to disguise his appearance with a dark black hat and dark sunglasses. His head is down, but he doesn't seem to notice the cameras as he is standing in front of one as he walks off the elevator and makes no attempt at covering his face.

"That BASTARD!" Ana screams moving closer to the screen.

"Ana? You know who this is?" Taylor asks surprised.

"I sure do" she says with confidence. "Jack fucking Hyde."

"This is him?" Barney asks, remembering the name from the research he had initially helped Ana with.

"I would bet money on it" she says. "See the ponytail? And that scar on his cheek…that's him."

"Who is Jack Hyde?" Welsh asks.

"An employee who hacked our server that I just fired" Ana explains with disgust.

"How did he take the termination of his employment?" Welsh asks.

"He denied all the accusations, despite Barney having concrete proof it was him" Ana says. "He was furious; for some reason he thought I was meeting with him to offer him a promotion. He yelled and screamed – Oh my god…"

"What is it?" I ask worried.

"I completely dismissed it when it happened, I thought he was just angry…" Ana mumbles.

"What did he say?" Taylor asks.

"He told me he would see that I paid for this…that I should sleep with one eye open" she says. "I thought he was just talking out of anger."

"He has a criminal record, right?" I ask.

"Yes….a very long one" she admits. "I didn't like the idea of keeping him on when I took over SIP but Mr. Roach insisted he was a very talented editor. His criminal record showed nothing in the last few years so I decided to keep him on but to keep a close eye on him."

"I just pulled his bank account activity for the last month" Welsh says. "It appears he emptied his account three days ago. There are no transactions on his credit cards either and he hasn't paid his mortgage in months – the bank was going to foreclose."

"So we don't know where he is?" Ana asks in a shaky voice.

"Not yet, but we will find him" Welsh vows.

"Ana, in the meantime I have hired a CPO for you-" Taylor says.

"I'm sorry…a what?" she interrupts.

"Close protection officer" Taylor answers. "A security guard if you will."

"Oh" Ana sighs.

"Luke Sawyer will be assigned to you" Taylor explains. "He will basically be your shadow, just as I am to Mr. Grey. He will accompany you to work every day and home; he will insure no one who is not approved to see you gets into your office. He should accompany you at all times; if you leave the building to get lunch, if you go to Seattle E Books, anywhere you go he goes. Even if it's somewhere in the building, be sure to let him know."

"I understand" Ana says quietly.

"I will be reviewing all security for SIP and Seattle E books to determine where your possible risk areas are. Barney says you upgraded your servers so we believe any risk areas will be to the physical layout of the buildings. I will prepare a report identifying risk areas with recommendations and approximate costs for eliminating the risk areas. As is standard for Mr. Grey, I will identify the risk areas using a leveling system so you can easily where you are most vulnerable and where you are least. I will be available at any time for consultation either in person or by phone" Welsh outlines.

"Thank you, I appreciate your assistance" Ana replies.

"Does anyone have anything else?" I ask, sensing that Ana is getting overwhelmed with all this information.

The meeting concludes with no one having any other information than what we already covered. Everyone leaves the room, however Ana makes no attempt to move from her chair. I can tell the shock is setting in as the reality of everything finally hits her.

"I didn't think he was serious" she says quietly. "I thought he was just mad that I was firing him."

"You couldn't have known he would react like this" I assure her.

"I should have seen it; given his criminal record I should have known this could happen" she sighs.

"Let's go back to my office, I have to check a few emails and then we can go back to my place" I say.

"Okay" she takes my hand and we walk by to my office.

Ana sits on the couch without saying much as I sit at my desk reading through several emails and updating a few reports. I ask Andrea to reschedule everything on my calendar for the remainder of the day and cancel my appointments on Monday as I'm not sure how Ana will be feeling by then. I'm just finishing my last email as I realize that Ana has fallen asleep on my couch. I pull a throw blanket out of the bathroom closet and lay it over her as I return to my desk. I spend the next few hours reading through reports and reviewing financial statements waiting for Ana to wake up. I'm sure she is exhausted from everything that happened at her apartment last night, plus our very long scene in the playroom on top of the emotional toll this meeting just took on her.

"Sorry," Ana says waking up. "How long was I asleep for?"

"About three hours" I smile.

"What?! You should have woken me up instead of waiting here for me" she stretches.

"It's fine…I was able to get a few things done" I say. "Are you ready to go get out of here?"

"Yes" she replies.

Taylor drives us back to Escala where we immediately head to my penthouse. There is no way I am allowing Ana back in her apartment until Jack Hyde is off the streets and her apartment has been restored to its original condition. She doesn't need to see the disgusting scene that Taylor described. Gail serves us a wonderful dinner when we arrive home and I can tell the toll this is taking on Ana as we eat in silence. She looks exhausted even though she took a long nap today; her eyes are filled with worry and concern.

"Ana, do you want to talk about it?" I ask gently as we sit in front of the fire.

"No" she sighs. "I'm just kicking myself for not taking the threat seriously."

"Ana you couldn't have predicted he would have reacted this way" I try to comfort her. "We will catch this bastard, I promise you that."

"Thank you Christian" she says.

"What do you need?" I ask completely out of my realm here.

"I think I just want to go to sleep" she answers.

"Of course" I said leading her upstairs.

As if on autopilot, I watch Ana enter the bedroom and go to the bathroom to get ready for bed. She takes off her clothes and crawls under the blankets closing her eyes as soon as her head hits the pillow. I use the bathroom, taking a few minutes to try to think of the best way to handle the situation before returning to the bedroom and joining her in bed. I decide the best thing I can do is simply comfort her; I move next to her on the bed and pull her close to me. I hold her tightly as she begins to sob in my arms; I reassure her everything is going to be okay as I hold her tightly as several minutes pass.

"Thank you Christian" she turns to look at me as she finishes crying.

"I'm here for you Ana, anything you need" I kiss her.

Her lips are so soft and moist from crying, I can't seem to get enough of them. I try to pull away, not wanting to push her into something she is not emotionally ready for but she grasps my head pulling me closer to her. Her tongue thrusts into my mouth as she moves her body so she is up against me.

"Ana…" I say pulling away briefly.

"Please Christian….just take my mind off of everything" she begs.

Her eyes beg as much as her voice does; I immediately give in and wrap my arm around her waist anchoring her next to me. She takes charge; quickly attacking my lips, sucking my lips, biting my lips as she rubs her sex against my growing erection. Realizing this is what she needs, I let her control the pace for tonight. If it gets her mind off of things, I'm willing to do anything she wants tonight. My hand reaches between us, stroking her sex as she moans into my mouth. She isn't as soaking as she usually is, but a few strokes to her clit has her juices flowing quickly.

"Ahhhhhhhhh" she moans as I push a finger into her tight sex.

She grinds her sex against my hand, as if she is trying to fuck me and the sight of it nearly brings me to my own orgasm. I quickly roll her on top of me, giving her complete control in this position which is what she seems to want tonight. She immediately sits up, grasps my erection and guides me into her tight, wet core.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh" She moans as she takes half of my erection inside of her.

"Deeper" I tell her.

She moves up and slides slowly down my erection a little further still not taking all of it in. She's been on top while I'm sitting up, but never when I'm lying down. I wonder if this position has her feeling more or if she is still sore from last night. I hope it's not the latter because I wouldn't want to be doing this if she is hurting.

"Oh God…." She moans as she finally takes me all in, sitting on me, grinding herself against me.

"You feel so good" I say grasping her breasts.

"Hmmmmmm" she moans.

I hold her hips, guiding her to start moving because if I stay like this much longer I'm likely to combust having her walls hold me as tight as they are. She must sense my need and she slowly begins to move up and down; sliding her sweet, wet pussy up and down my dick. I watch myself go in and out of her and the mere sight of it has me heading straight for an orgasm.

"You look so hot when you do that" I say as she slams herself onto my dick.

"Christian…." She moans.

"Come when you can baby" I tell her; this is not a scene, this I about her.

"I need…faster….harder" she says.

"Do it baby….let me watch you make yourself come when you ride me" I tell her.

She leans forward slightly, placing her hands on my chest as she begins to ride me harder and faster. I momentarily pause watching her hands on my chest but not feeling anything. There is no pain, no panic, nothing. Her eyes are closed as she loses herself, focusing on nothing but the pleasure she is receiving. I am in shock, as I too am feeling nothing but pleasure despite her hands on the middle of my chest.

"Ahhhhhh" she moans pulling me from my realization.

"Play with your clit baby" I instruct. "I want to see you make yourself come when you're fucking me."

"Ohhhhhhh" she complies with my request.

She rubs her clit as she continues to ride me hard and fast just as she said she needed. I can see her struggling to continue the pace as the orgasm approaches. I pinch her nipple hard and she screams out my name as her walls grasp me tightly causing me to find my own release. She collapses on my chest, continuing to move up and down on my erection riding out her own orgasm. I hold her tightly before rolling us onto our sides where I kiss her deeply.

"Thank you" she says.

"Anything you need Ana, anything" I assure her.

We fall asleep once again just like that, our connection to each other in place and our bodies wrapped around each other. Her leg holds me close to her as her arm around my waist insures that I don't pull her out of her. She needs this connection as much as I did the night I spent inside of her following my nightmare.


	15. Chapter 15

_All characters belong to E.L. James_.

**Chpt. 15 APOV:**

The weekend passes by quietly; Christian and I spend the entire weekend at his place neither of us wanting to leave. I try to keep my mind off of everything that happened on Thursday, but no matter what I do my mind seems to wander back to the image of my apartment that night. All I wanted to do was to crawl into my bed and go to sleep, instead I had to deal with everything that Hyde did that night. Christian has been wonderful all weekend; trying to keep my mind off the situation and reassuring me that Hyde will be caught. I'm very thankful for Christian right now, he has been nothing short of amazing in helping me deal with everything going on. From handling the logistics of getting my apartment back to normal, to having clothes delivered to the apartment, to hiring security and from just holding me when I needed to cry he has done everything that I could have asked for.

"Did you want to go to the office tomorrow or would you rather work from here?" Christian asks.

"No, I need to go. There are several things that I left that I'm in the middle of working on plus being out of the office all last week I'm sure there are things stacking up" I answer as we get ready for bed.

"If you change your mind, you can always use my office here" he says.

"Thanks" I crawl into bed and cuddle up next to Christian.

Very quickly, Christian is fast asleep next to me yet I find that I am wide awake. I can't believe how everything has changed between us. A year ago, we were perfect strangers in a foreign country looking to explore a lifestyle we knew very little about. We spent two wonderful nights together in Taiwan before being separated having never known each other's real name. A year later, we happen to meet at a charity event that Kate invites me to just as I relocate to Seattle. We just started getting to know each other again when Hyde attacks and now I find that we are practically living together at least for the foreseeable future. If you would have told me when I first started learning more about BDSM that this is the type of relationship I would be I would have told you that you were crazy. Initially I thought I would have a dom that I would occasionally, maybe on the weekends or a couple nights during the week for a scene and that would be the extent of our involvement with one another. I could never picture something like that with Christian; we seem to have an emotional connection and I think we have from the first night in Taiwan.

The week passes by slowly; as Taylor said, Luke Sawyer is my shadow every day outside of Christian's apartment. I thought it would be weird having someone follow me around all day, but Sawyer sort of blends in at the office. He doesn't enter to my office unless necessary and thankfully does not follow me to the restroom since he can see it from where he sits outside my office. Stacy and Sawyer have seemed to have hit it off which I'm thankful for since she is the key to my office running smoothly. Most nights this week I am at Christian's apartment long before he is; several nights I have felt him crawl into bed long after I have already been asleep. He has several big projects going on that he is trying to wrap up which I don't mind because it's given me the opportunity to catch up on the work I missed last week.

There is nothing new on the Jack Hyde front; Welsh checks his financial transactions daily but nothing has come up since he emptied his bank account. Taylor is handling everything with the home owner's insurance company and with Escala's management team to insure my apartment is fully restored to its original condition as quickly as possible. We still don't know how Hyde accessed my security code for the elevator; reports indicate though that it was my code in the elevator used to access my floor that night.

_What time are you done working tonight? –C_

_I should be done in the next hour or so –A_

_Come to my office when you're done? I have a conference call but could have dinner here? –C_

_Sure –A _

After I wrap up the manuscript I'm approving, I send off a few emails and pack up my laptop for the weekend and head out with Sawyer. Christian and I haven't talked about this weekend but I'm hoping he doesn't have to go into the office every day. If he does, I will likely spend some time shopping with Kate or at least meeting her for lunch since I feel like I haven't seen her very much since the charity ball. As we leave the office, Sawyer notifies Taylor that we are on our way and he drives the few blocks to GEH. I never realized how close Christian's office was to SIP; it's literally a matter of blocks away.

"Hello Mr. Grey" I walk into Christian's office.

"Shut and lock the door" Christian says in his dom voice.

I immediately comply and as quickly as I turn around, Christian's lips are on mine. Christian and I haven't been intimate in days; his late hours and early mornings have left it impossible for us to spend much time together. He pushes me up against the wall, his lips crushing mine as his hands roam my entire body. He presses his erection against my sex and despite all of our clothes; I can feel how much he wants me right now. His lips never leaving mine, he unbuttons my blouse tossing it to the floor before nearly ripping my bra off. He pushes my skirt and underwear down so I am left in only a pair of heels.

"I missed you" Christian moans as I rub his erection through his pants.

"Mr. Grey, your call is about to start" his assistant says through the intercom.

I look at Christian confused as he leads me to his desk; he unbuttons his pants and pulls down his boxer briefs before sitting in his desk chair.

"Under the desk" he says.

I quickly realize he wants me to fulfill my promise of sucking him off during a conference call which the very thought of turns me on. I kneel under his large wooden desk and am thankful that even if someone were to come in right now they couldn't see me under here. Just as I reach up to stroke Christian, he quickly gets up from the chair and I hear him walking around the office. I have no idea what he is doing but he quickly returns to his chair, adjusting his chair so the height places his rock hard erection is inches from my mouth. I immediately grasp his erection in my hand and begin slowly stroking it as I hear him lift his phone to begin his conference call. I slowly lick him up and down, kissing the tip of his erection before taking him into my mouth. Christian's voice never gives any indication of what is going on, however his hand is gripping my head tightly as he urges me to take him deeper.

"One moment gentleman" I hear Christian say. "Andrea, I need the file we spoke about earlier, please bring it in quickly…..Gentleman you may continue I will have the file shortly."

Christian pushes my head down roughly against his erection until he hits the back of my throat. Seconds later I hear his office door open and I pull back causing him to nearly fall out of my mouth. Christian quickly pulls me back to his erection, once again pulling me so he is deep in my mouth. I hear Andrea approach his desk and him talking to her; there is nothing I can do but hope she is oblivious to what is occurring under the desk she just put a folder on. Christian eases his grip on my head, I slowly resume my pace of sucking him as I hear Andrea leave his office.

"Gentleman, please hold on for a moment…I have another call but will be back shortly" Christian says.

Christian holds my head firmly with his hands, setting his own pace as he thrusts deep into me several times. His breathing has increased and I can hear him moaning quietly as his grip on me becomes tighter.

"Oh….ANA!" he moans just before finding his release deep inside of my throat.

"I can't tell you how many times I've thought about that since you were in here last week" Christian helps me from under his desk.

"Me too" I smile.

"I need to finish this call before we head home, there's dinner on the table under the hot plate. Will you bring me one?" Christian asks.

"Sure," I say putting my clothes back on.

Christian and I eat our dinner, however business separates us as he continues his conference call and I check emails when finishing my dinner. After another hour or so, Christian finally ends his conference screaming into the phone before throwing the file he was working on across the room. I've never seen Christian like this; his eyes are full of anger and frustration.

"Are you done?" he asks.

"Yes" I answer quietly.

"Let's go" he says packing up his briefcase before taking my hand as we leave his office.

The ride back to Escala is quiet but I can feel the tension radiating from Christian's body. I don't know what the conference call was about or why it turned out sour so quickly as I was wrapped up in reading edits on a manuscript but whatever happened I can tell it pissed Christian off. Christian spends most of the ride responding to emails on his phone and as soon as we arrive at his apartment he apologizes and heads to his office. I can tell he is frustrated and stressed but I really don't know Christian well enough to know what helps him when he is like this. I quickly come up with an idea, take my phone and head to the playroom. I unlock the door and step inside; immediately I remember the last time we were in this room – the night Hyde destroyed my apartment. That night was amazing, even though I thought Christian was crazy for bringing me in here with everything going on, it truly did help me feel better. It took my mind off the entire situation and eventually I listened to what Christian had been trying to tell me from the beginning – that he had everything handled. Just remembering that night, the intense scene and the hard orgasms that I had that night has my panties soaked. I quickly remove my clothes, folding them as I put them on the table.

_I'm waiting your command sir –A _

I kneel on the floor in standard sub position, having put my phone on the table with my clothes as I don't expect a response. A few moments later, I hear the door open and Christian gasps loudly likely taking in my naked body. My eyes remain glued to the floor as I hear Christian shut and lock the door behind him.

"Stand" he orders, his voice in full dom mode.

I quickly stand in front of him, my eyes remaining glued to the floor as he walks around my body slowly. I feel his eyes roaming my body as if he is looking at me for the first time. His hands gently explore my body, rubbing my back, massaging my breasts, touching me everywhere as I struggle to hold in a moan.

"You're very wet" he states.

"Yes sir" I feel my face blush.

"Tell me what you were thinking about when you walked in here" he requests.

"The last time we were in here…." I begin. "The intensity of the scene….how hard I came…."

"And that got you excited?" He asks rubbing my clit.

"Yes sir" I moan.

I hear Christian walking around the room, I hear drawers open and close but my eyes remain fixed on the floor. He returns and quickly places a blindfold over my eyes before gently pushing my legs apart. I quickly feel him insert the Ben Wa balls deep inside my sex as I gasp at sudden action. I suddenly feel him sucking on my nipples hard, pinching and sucking them repeatedly just before he attaches a clamp to both of them.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhh" I moan at the slight pain.

"On your knees" he commands.

I immediately comply; I feel his hands gently open my mouth before he inserts something large and round in it. He attaches something around my head which seems to connect to the other side of my mouth. I realize that the item he has affixed to my mouth makes it impossible to close my mouth. Without warning he thrusts his erection in my mouth, holding my head so he immediately hits the back of my throat. I struggle to swallow and I realize this even more difficult to do than normal seeing that my mouth is stuck in this open position. I'm holding onto his thighs tightly as he continues to thrust in and out of my mouth while I'm feeling immobilized by this item. The constant thrusting moves the balls inside of me around nearly hitting my g spot every time Christian hits the back of my throat. This continues for several minutes until I'm moaning loudly with Christian deep in my throat. Just as unexpected as he entered my mouth, he quickly pulls out and removes the item that was holding my mouth open. My jaw is sore from being open for so long but I'm so turned at this moment I don't pay much attention to it. He lifts me up off the floor and I immediately feel the wetness between my legs; my thighs are likely coated with my juices.

Christian attaches a long chain to my nipple clamps and gently pulls on it urging me to walk towards him. I can't see anything, but I have been in this room enough times to have a general idea of the layout. He leads me a few feet before turning me around, his lips finding mine, his tongue thrusting in out of my mouth quickly. He pushes his erection against my clit, making me moan loudly against his lips. I can feel him slick with my juice which turns me on even more. He takes gently lifts my leg up to attach it to the cross that I now realize is behind me. My other leg and wrists are attached and I realize I am on full view for him. My face flushes with embarrassment realizing he is likely standing there staring at my naked body, seeing all my imperfections while there is nothing I can do. My hands are immobilized above my head so I can't cover my body up.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" I moan as a riding crop comes down on my stomach.

The riding crop hits me lightly all across my body, hitting my breasts, my clit, my stomach, my hips over and over again. My body tries to move against the cross but I'm not sure if it's to get closer or further from the crop as my skin heats up drastically each time the crop hits me. The movement causes the balls to move around me intensively hitting that magical spot every time.

"Christian….." I moan.

"Tell me" he requests.

"Please….Christian…" I moan.

"Tell me" he orders.

"Please….I need to come….Sir Please" I beg.

Christian's lips are on mine again, his hand is against my sex rubbing is harshly as I find myself grinding against him trying to find some relief. Suddenly the balls are removed, I come hard and loud screaming Christian's name repeatedly.

"Did I say you could come?" Christian releases my arms and legs before assisting me from the cross.

"No sir" I say breathlessly.

Christian doesn't say a word but I can sense his displeasure immediately. He leads me to the bed, removing the nipple clamps harshly before directing me to bend over the bed. He walks around the room once again, more drawers are opened which increases my anxiety not knowing what he is going to do. I'm lying on the bed, my overly sensitive nipples rubbing against the cool fabric when I suddenly feel Christian behind me, rubbing his erection against my soaking folds. His hand finds my clit, all too quickly my legs are turning to rubber the more turned on I get. I'm quickly on the verge of an orgasm when I feel him press a cold object against my ass. My breath hitches remembering the anal play during our last scene. Although my mind thought it was wrong, my body enjoyed it tremendously as evident by the hard orgasm that ended our session.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh" I moan as he pushes it into me.

"Breath" he says before quickly pushing the remainder of the item into me.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh…..Christian" I moan.

This feels bigger than the last time; not just wider but it feels like it's deeper inside of me than before. I'm breathing heavy at the uncomfortable feeling and contemplate using my safe word but once again as soon as Christian begins rubbing my clit and my nipples, my body defies and juices coat the erection that is probing my entrance. I quickly find the orgasm that was out of reach moments ago, building very quickly as Christian continues to tease my opening. I find myself grinding against him, needing him, wanting him…

"What do you want Ana?" he asks.

"Fuck me…please Christian, fuck me" I beg shamelessly.

"Do you want to come again?" he asks.

"Oh….God…Yes!" I scream as he thrusts inside of me quickly.

I'm so full, the sensations are overwhelming. The plug in my ass pushes Christian closer to my g spot so every time he moves I feel him deep inside of me. I am moaning loudly as the feelings become too intense, having both of my holes penetrated intensifies the feelings drastically.

"Christian…..I'm so close….Please" I beg.

"Come Ana!" he thrusts in me hard.

"CHRISTIAN!" I scream as the orgasm rips through my body.

"Oh God Ana! You feel so tight!" Christian moans thrusting into me hard before finding his release.

Christian stays deep inside of me for several minutes as we both ride out our orgasms. After several minutes, he gently pulls out of me as I moan at the sudden empty feeling. Christian takes off my blindfold before massaging my very sore legs. He quickly finds the silk robe that I have worn several times and helps me put it on before kissing me deeply, pulling me close to his body.

"You came without my permission" he says.

"I'm sorry….I couldn't hold it" I admitted blushing deeply.

"I thought about punishing you by not allowing you to come the rest of the night" he says.

"Hmmmmmmmm" I whimper at the thought, especially after that intense session.

"Instead, I decided I'm going to leave this here for the night" he says pushing the butt plug into me further.

"What? Christian….I…." I whine.

"Every time you move tonight it will remind you who is in charge of your orgasms" he points out.

"Yes sir" I sigh.

"Let's go to bed" he takes my hand and leads me out of the room to his bedroom.

Walking is somewhat uncomfortable as each movement jostles the plug inside of me. I quickly use the bathroom, which is not as easy as one would think with a plug up your ass, and return to bed where Christian is waiting for me. I strip off the robe, climbing into bed and cuddling up next to Christian.

"Thank you" he sighs.

"For?" I ask confused.

"Calling me into the playroom" he rubs my legs gently.

"You seemed so stressed out, I wasn't sure how to help you" I admit.

"What you saw today is the exact reason I started to explore BDSM. When things at work begin spinning out of control I feel like I need to take control of something else in my life. I've been working on this project all week and it seems like every time we get close to finalizing the plans something gets in our way and delays our process" he explains.

"I get it" I kiss him gently. "It was the same reason I started looking into the lifestyle. Except when my world gets out of control, I want someone to take control for me so I don't have to be in charge for once."

"Well, I hope you don't have plans this weekend because I plan on spending a lot of time with you making up for this week" he smiles against my neck.

"I'm looking forward to it" I quickly fall asleep.

The morning sun wakes me a couple of hours later and I find Christian sound asleep next to me. Every other day in the past week, I have woken up alone or with him already in the shower getting ready for work. I move next to him, resting my head against his chest listening to him breath peacefully. I'm unable to go back to sleep even though it's early; I decide to go down to the kitchen to start breakfast. I quickly find my robe, throwing it on before heading to the kitchen. Christian told me that Gail is off on the weekends and unless Taylor needs him he is typically in the staff quarters so I don't worry about walking around in the skimpy robe. I make a pot of coffee and begin making omelets for breakfast; as I move around the kitchen I am constantly reminded of our scene last night seeing that the plug is still deep inside of me. I'm just finishing breakfast when Christian comes down from the bedroom and kisses me on the cheek.

"My mother is on her way over…you might want to go put some clothes" he smiles.

"Shit" I dart upstairs to find some clothes; the last thing I want is to meet his mother wearing a thin silk robe with nothing underneath.

I quickly settle on a sun dress before washing up in the bathroom and returning to the kitchen where Christian is already enjoying his omelet. I sit next to Christian, wincing as I momentarily forget about the plug that Christian has decided needs to stay inside of me until God knows when. He smirks at me seeing my sudden discomfort just as his mother enters the kitchen.

"Mother, I would like you to meet Anastasia Steele" Christian introduces.

"Mrs. Grey it's so nice to meet you" I say shaking her hand.

"Please, call me Grace. It's lovely to meet you as well" she says.

"Would you like coffee or tea?" I offer clearing our breakfast plates.

"Coffee would be nice, thank you" she answers.

I quickly make Grace a cup of coffee and decide against trying to sit down again since it likely won't happen without making a face in discomfort. We all chat for a few minutes before Grace excuses herself saying she needs to get to work but not before inviting both of us to dinner at her house next weekend. Christian walks her to the elevator letting her know we would be at dinner as I load the dishwasher with our breakfast dishes. Christian returns to the kitchen, grasping my ass as I bend over to put a pan in the dishwasher.

"You have such a perfect ass" he says pulling me against him.

"As do you Mr. Grey" I say turning around and grabbing his ass.

"I really like this dress" his hands exploring everything under my dress.

"Hmmmmmmmmm" I moan as his fingers gently move across my sex.

My lips quickly find Christian's; I run my tongue against his lips seeking entry. His hand continues to rub against my sex, with just enough pressure to turn me on but not enough to bring me to an orgasm. I reach between us and easily find his erection which is already rock hard. I stroke his erection through his pajama pants causing him to moan against my lips. His tongue finds mine just as his fingers move my panties aside and brush against my now drenched folds. I moan at the light contact, needing more, wanting more.

"Christian" I moan.

"Hmmmmm?" he asks.

"I want you….I need you" I grind my sex shameless against his hand as I reach into his pants to find his erection.

"I want you in my office" He says guiding me out of the kitchen.

He locks his office door behind us as our hands continue to explore each other, his lips once again find mine. He pulls my dress above my head before removing the remainder of my clothing. I push his pants and boxer briefs down to his ankles pausing on my way back up to take his hard erection into my mouth. He gasps at the surprise but his hand holds my head in place, encouraging me to continue sucking him. I take him in deep several times before Christian pulls me back to his mouth. He rubs his erection against my sex causing me to moan loudly. He leads me to the couch where he sits down and pulls me onto him so I am straddling him from behind. I bend slightly over his knees, grasping his erection before guiding it to my awaiting sex. I gently push myself down on him, he is barely inside of me before I am reminded by the incredible full feeling that I still have the plug in.

"Hmmmmmm" I whimper as I try to take him in deeper.

"Play with your clit" He commands.

I comply with his request as I slowly move against him, each time taking him a little deeper. The orgasm quickly approaches as my fingers rub against my clit; Christian's hands are firm on my hips guiding my movements.

"Oh God!" I moan as the orgasm is coming fast.

"Come for me….Let me see you come on me" he commands.

His words send me over the edge, I scream loudly as the orgasm rips through me. Christian holds me in place, moving in and out of me gently letting me ride out the final waves of my orgasm before lifting me off of him. He leads me over to his desk and gently lays me across it, the hard cold wood causing me to shiver.

"Hold your legs" he puts my hands under my knees pulling me open for him.

Christian rubs his erection up and down my sex, teasing my opening before finally slamming to me. He pulls me close to him, pushing himself further inside of me and I feel more full than before.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" I moan at the fullness.

"Does it feel good?" Christian says moving slowly in and out of me.

"Oh God" I moan as he rubs my clit with his thumb.

"Tell me how it feels" he requests.

"Full…..so full" I moan.

Christian continues moving in and out of my slowly, letting me get accustomed to the feeling before increasing the pace. Within minutes, he begins thrusting in and out of me hitting my g spot every time he enters me.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I scream as he thrusts into me deeply, staying there moving himself in small circles.

"Come with me" He orders.

He continues thrusting in me deeply, hitting that wonderful spot each time. We both scream each other's names as the orgasm rips through us at the same time. He pulls me up off the desk, staying inside of me carrying me to the couch where we were almost minutes ago. He sits down, before pulling me down on him so our connection remains. I rest my head on his shoulder, sighing in content.

"Ohhhhhhhh" I moan as he finally removes the plug from my ass.

"You okay?" he asks.

"Yes" I answer.

"I missed you this week" he admits.

"Me too" I smile against him.

"Let's go take a shower" he suggests.

Our weekend is filled with sex both in and out of the playroom, by Sunday night we are both refreshed and ready for the week ahead of us. Given the hectic week Christian had the week before, this weekend was exactly what we both needed. It was also nice getting to know Christian outside of the bedroom and playroom. Although we have spent some time together outside of the playroom/bedroom, it was nothing compared to this weekend. We learned more about each other's day to day habits, preferences and overall mannerisms.


	16. Chapter 16

Author's Note: Thank you for your wonderful reviews!

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 16 APOV:**

The next week passes by slowly; Christian continues to work long days, often leaving before I'm even awake in the morning and coming back to his apartment only to continue working until well into the night. He is more stressed out than usual but he not as stressed as he was last Friday when I was at his office. He mentions the possibility of having to return to Taiwan in the upcoming weeks which I can tell he is unhappy about. Just the mention of Taiwan has me instantly remember the wonderful two nights we spent together there, both of us discovering BDSM for the first time. It's truly amazing to think about how far we have come since then. We are having dinner with Christian's family tomorrow night which has me a little nervous but Christian has reassured me that I have nothing to worry about.

"Are you ready Ms. Steele?" Sawyer asks.

"Yes, we can head to the office now" I pick up my bag and head to the foyer.

The ride to SIP is relatively short; Stacy greats Sawyer and I as soon as we enter. As is customary, Sawyer checks my office before allowing me to enter declaring the office is now safe. It's been two weeks since Hyde destroyed my apartment and we still have no indication of his whereabouts. Taylor reports that my apartment should finally be restored to normal by the end of next week but Christian has told me I am staying with him until Hyde is caught. Honestly, I have no desire to return to my apartment right now; I don't know how I can walk in there and not see the damage he did or think he was hiding somewhere. Staying with Christian makes me feel much safer although I find myself wishing he wasn't working so much but I know this is the nature of owning your own business.

I'm sorting through the piles on my desk of various manuscripts that were submitted to me for approval yesterday when I find a thin brown envelope mixed in the pile. I know this wasn't here last night when I left because I put the pile of manuscripts in a specific order before leaving. Stacy had left long before me, but even if she hadn't she wouldn't rearrange a pile and stick an envelope in the middle. I rack my brain thinking of how everything looked last night before I left the office but I know for certain that this envelope was not in this pile. There is nothing on the front to indicate what it is so I open it and am shocked at the contents. There are several black and white photos of me; many of them appear as if they were taken while relatively close to me. I see a couple with me and Sawyer walking into or out of SIP. There is only one photo of me with Christian which appears to have been taken last week when we were leaving GEH. A note falls out from between the photos:

I am watching you

"Stacy?" I call through the intercom.

"Yes Ms. Steele?" she answers immediately.

"Please send Sawyer in" I say in a shaky voice.

"Ms. Steele?" Sawyer quickly walks through the door.

I can't say anything but point to the mess of pictures on my desk and the note which looks as if it was cut from a magazine. I vaguely hear Sawyer talking to whom I assume is Taylor on his phone, but I'm too stunned to comprehend what is going on. I don't understand how Hyde or someone could have gotten this close to me. How could Hyde have gotten in my office to deliver the envelope? I was here until well after seven last night and I know I was the last one to leave because Sawyer and I locked the doors as we left.

"Ms. Steele?" Sawyer calls pulling me from my thoughts.

"What?" I ask.

"Mr. Grey would like you to come to his office and finish working your day there" Sawyer says.

I sigh knowing there is no point in arguing with Christian when it comes to my safety and right now I don't feel very safe at SIP. I received Welsh's security report yesterday which outlined several key risk areas of our building highlighting the fact that SIP does not have any type of video surveillance system. I had reviewed the report last night, adding a few questions before returning it to Welsh. My intention was to have work started some of the area in the next couple of weeks but now I may need to increase the start date.

"Stacy, please take the rest of the day off" I tell her as I pack up my stuff.

"Ms. Steele?" she asks confused.

"I'm going to be leaving for the day, why don't you get a head start on your weekend" I suggest.

"Thank you that would be nice" she says before leaving my office.

"Taylor is on his way here, we will have a car waiting out front for us" Sawyer says.

"What about the car you drove?" I ask.

"We will pick it up this weekend, Taylor prefers we get directly to GEH where they can monitor everything more closely" Sawyer explains.

"Okay, I just want to gather up a few things" I say stacking my piles.

Sawyer helps me pack everything up, I have several manuscripts that I'm bringing with me to GEH in addition to my laptop. Sawyer packs up the pictures and the envelope, wearing gloves to preserve any fingerprints I assume although I doubt any will be found. Something tells me Hyde is too smart to leave fingerprints on the letter especially after taking the time to cut every individual letter out of a newspaper or magazine.

"Taylor is out front, are you ready?" Sawyer asks.

"Yes, please don't give any indication to Stacy that anything is going on" I request.

"She has already left" he explains.

Sawyer ushers me outside, keeping me close to him before ushering me into the awaiting black SUV that Taylor is driving. The ride to GEH is fast and quiet, neither Taylor nor Sawyer talking. I can't help but think of Hyde in my office and I'm disgusted at the thought of him being in my office, touching my desk, maybe even sitting in my chair.

"Ms. Steele, we have arrived" Sawyer pulls me from my thoughts.

Once again, Sawyer keeps me close to him until we enter the GEH lobby at which point he bypasses the receptionist immediately taking me to the elevator to Christian's office. As we exit the elevator, Andrea greets me telling me to make myself comfortable in Christian's office as he is in a meeting but should be done soon. I set up a work station on the table in Christian's office but find it difficult to concentrate without thinking of the pictures I found this morning.

"Shit!" I spill my tea as Christian startles me walking into his office.

"Here, let me get a towel" Christian walks into the bathroom before helping me clean up the mess.

"Thank you" I mumble quietly as I wipe the tea off my skirt.

"I can have Andrea get you another cup" he offers.

"No, it was cold anyway" I sigh.

"How are you?" Christian pulls me close to him.

"Scared" I admit. "He was in my office Christian…"

"I know baby" he rubs my back while holding me tighter.

"Why can't he leave me alone?" I ask.

"I will find him, I promise you" he vows.

"I don't know how he got in last night, Sawyer and I locked the doors before we left and set the alarm. I'm certain of it and Sawyer confirmed that we had everything set last night" I say.

"Did you change the alarm codes after you fired Hyde?" Christian asks.

"Yes, that day every code and password was changed" I answer.

"Interesting….maybe someone internally gave him the code? Or delivered the package for him?" he suggests.

"So now I can't trust anyone at SIP" I sigh.

"Shhhhh let's not jump to conclusions. Welsh and Taylor are going to access the alarm company records to see if the alarm was triggered or turned off last night and if so when" he explains.

"Thank you" I hug him tighter.

"Do you want to go back to Escala?" he asks.

"No, you have work to do and if I can figure out how to concentrate I have several things to take care of as well" I answer.

"What can I do to help you? What do you need?" he asks his eyes full of concern.

"Take my mind off of everything…please" I beg.

"Tell me how…what do you need?" he asks.

"I can think of something" I smile, rubbing my sex against him.

"Are you sure? With everything going on…" I interrupt Christian by kissing him deeply.

I understand Christian's hesitation; with everything going on you would think the last thing I wanted would be sex. When Hyde broke into my apartment, although I didn't realize it was what I needed, the time in the playroom took my mind off of everything long enough for me to be able to make sense of it later. When I had a nightmare that I found Hyde in my apartment, being intimate with Christian helped me forget everything even just momentarily.

"Please Christian….take my mind off of everything" I beg.

"Andrea, hold all my calls" Christian says into the intercom before locking the door.

Christian's lips find mine; he kisses me softly his tongue gently probing my mouth. Christian's hands caress my body, softly moving all over me. The feeling is exquisite, but right now I don't need soft, I need dom Christian to take control.

"Please…..sir….." I beg trying to tell Christian what I need.

"Take off your clothes, put them on the table" Christian says a few moments later in his dom voice.

I sigh in relief before complying with this request. This is what I need; I need to get lost in a scene, to have someone take control over my body so I don't have to think about anything but pleasing Christian right now. I stand before him completely naked as he walks around me, looking me up and down before his mouth comes against mine forcefully. He pulls me close to him; I moan feeling his erection against my sex.

"Take my clothes off" he says.

This is new, typical dom Christian always removes his own clothing but I immediately comply with his request. I loosen his tie, gently pulling it above his head to remove it. I run my hands up and down his firm abs, careful not to touch his chest before pulling the shirt over his head. I gently kiss his chest, causing him to gasp before I fall to my knees in front of him unbuttoning his pants. I gently remove his pants and underwear but do not move from the floor as I await Christian's next request.

"Suck me" he orders. "Clasp your hands behind your back."

I do as he commands; my hands are clasped together behind me as he guides my head to his awaiting erection. Christian takes a small step closer to me thrusting his erection deep into my throat, causing me to nearly gag at the sudden intrusion. I have no control right now, my hands remain behind my back; Christian guides me setting the pace he needs. He thrusts in and out of my mouth quickly, before plunging deep in my throat, hitting the back forcefully. I struggle but manage to swallow around him, earning a moan from him as he holds my head tight against him. I breathe through my nose, telling myself not to panic as he stays deep in my throat for several minutes. He pulls back against, as I suck on him and run my tongue around him as I feel his grip on my head tighten. I find myself getting turned on listening to the sounds of pleasure coming from Christian.

"Ahhhhhh….don't stop" he moans.

Christian thrusts in and out of my mouth quickly before forcefully hitting the back of my throat again. I swallow against him, taking him deeper as Christian pulls me even closer to him. I start to gag but Christian's grip on my head remains firm so I have no choice but to take him all in. He is deeper in me than ever before, I feel his balls against my chin as he holds me tightly against him.

"Breath" he reminds me.

I slowly inhale through my nose which makes it somewhat less uncomfortable. He remains deep inside of me for what feels like several minutes, but is likely only a few seconds before pulling back slightly. I take a deep breath but my relief is short lived as he thrusts into my mouth deeply again. He again pulls me closer to him, urging me to take him deeper. I struggle, but manage not to gag as he remains deep in my throat. This pattern continues for what feels like ages, but I can tell he is getting close as his breathing increases and his pace becomes more erratic. He thrusts hard into my mouth, catching me off guard but I quickly recover.

"Oh God Ana….I'm going to come" he moans as he pushes himself further against my throat.

Christian finds his release in what I believe is his new favorite spot, deep in my throat. With him so deep in me, I am left with no choice but to take everything he has to offer struggling to swallow as he remains lodged in my mouth. Finally he pulls back minimally, allowing me to breathe easier but his hand holds my head close to him so I continue to suck him. He pulls out of my mouth without a word and lays on the floor next to me.

"I want to taste you while your mouth is on me" he says.

The mere thought of what he is suggesting has my juices flowing as Christian guides me over to him. Christian urges me to straddle his face before I lower my body on his, moving my mouth to his now soft erection. I feel his hands grip my thighs tightly, pulling my sex closer to him so I can feel his breath on my core. His tongue slowly roams my sex, as if he is exploring it as I moan with pleasure.

"Suck me" he thrusts his hips towards my mouth. "If you stop, I stop."

I grasp his soft erection in my hand guiding him to my mouth. My tongue darts to his tip, tasting the come that drips out of him. With him this soft, I can easily take him entirely in my mouth however I know he won't be soft for very long. I moan against him as his tongue finds my clit and his finger slowly enters me. I struggle to follow his instructions, to continue sucking on him while my own orgasm quickly approaches. I try shameless to grind my sex against his hand, wanting more, needing him to enter me deeper but he holds me hips in place.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh" I moan as a second finger enters me.

Christian's softness is now gone, his rock hard erection once again appearing as I struggle to take him deeper in this position knowing he seems to enjoy that. His fingers continue to plunge in and out of my sex, he continues to suck hard on my clit and I quickly find myself teetering on the edge – needing a release.

"Hmmmmmmmmm" I moan loudly with Christian still in my mouth.

"Do you need to come?" Christian asks as his fingers curl to his that magical spot.

"Yes…" I moan.

"Tell me" he instructs.

"Please sir….please let me come" I beg.

"Take me all in" he instructs and I immediately comply, bringing him to the back of my throat. "Keep me there while you come."

"Hmmmmmmmmm" I moan around him as his fingers plunge deep inside of me again.

"COME ANA!" He commands.

"HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM" I scream around his erection, still deep in my throat as the orgasm rips through me.

I am vaguely aware of his tongue replacing his fingers in my core, bringing all my juices closer to him. I continue to ride out my orgasm, bucking my hips against him as I continue to hold him deep in my mouth.

"Go to the couch, bend over the arm" he instructs slowly removing his fingers from my throbbing core.

I awkwardly crawl off of Christian, before standing and walking to the couch as he instructed. I bend over the arm rest, my juices gushing at the thought of Christian taking me like this especially knowing that his assistant is right outside the door. I hear him fumble with this clothing before he walks towards me.

"I need to keep you quiet" he smiles. "We can't have the entire office hearing you scream in pleasure again."

Christian shows me the silver tie that he was wearing when I walked in; I remember thinking how good he looked in it before I took it off. I look at him confused but he quickly makes his intentions known as he puts the tie in my mouth tying it behind my head. He runs his hands along my back as he walks to the end of the couch where my body eagerly waits for him. I've never been gagged before but find myself turned on even more at the new feeling. Without warning Christian slams into me deeply and I moan against the tie. I can't talk or make a coherent sound; I bite the tie as the pleasure races through me. My body is on fire as Christian begins thrusting in and out of me, his hands firm on my hips allowing him to control the movements. He continues this pace for some time and I feel the orgasm building deep inside of me.

"You like that?" He grabs the back of the tie pulling my chest forcefully up off the couch.

"Hmmm Hmmm" I try to agree around his tie.

"You like it when I fuck you hard, don't you?" he asks pulling on the gag harder.

"Hmmmmmmm" I nod furiously.

He holds me up off the couch like this as he continues to thrust hard and deep into me. I'm moaning in ecstasy as the sensations threaten to overtake me. I don't know how much longer I can hold back the orgasm but I know I'm going to come hard soon regardless if Christian says I can.

"Come Ana!" He commands just as the orgasm rips through me.

"Hmmmmmmmmmmmm!" I moan loudly as I feel him swell just before he finds his own release, deep inside of me.

He gently moves in and out of me, prolonging both of our orgasms. While still inside of me, he unties the gag and gently removes it from my mouth.

"Come clean me up" he says.

I pause for a minute, momentarily taken back by his request as he has never asked this of me before. It's not like I haven't sucked him after he was inside of me but never at the end of a scene. A quick slap to my ass reminds me that he is waiting and I immediately move from the couch to kneeling on the floor in front of him. His erection is still semi hard as I guide him into my mouth.

"Suck" he commands urging me to take him deeper.

I follow his request; sucking him, tasting both of our releases which coat his erection. After the last bit of come is released, Christian pulls me up kissing me deeply and holding me against him.

"Do you feel better?" he asks.

"Much…thank you" I smile against his bare chest.

"I wasn't sure…." He begins.

"That's what I needed" I interrupt. "I needed you to take control, I needed to not focus on anything other than you for a while."

"I didn't want it to seem like I was taking advantage of you" his voice full of worry.

"Christian, can we talk?" I ask.

"Please Ana, I want to know how you feel" he guides me to the couch.

"When Hyde broke into my apartment, that night you insisted we go to the playroom I thought you were crazy" I admit. "I thought it was the last thing I needed, but you proved me wrong. Being there, focusing on nothing but you took my mind off of everything just long enough. Having a clearer mind, I was able to look at it again later differently. It's like my world starts spinning out of control and whatever is causing it is the only thing I can think about. You manage to take my mind off of it and force me to focus on something else."

"If you ever think a scene is not what you need and you don't want to do it, please be sure to use your safe words Ana" he says. "We are both new to this and I just don't want to screw it up."

"Christian, I'm sure we're going to make mistakes…like you said we are both new to the lifestyle. I think it's one of the things that make me so comfortable with you; I don't have to worry about being perfect or acting like the perfect sub" I explain.

"Just promise me you will tell me if you're uncomfortable with anything or if I do something that bothers you" he looks me in the eyes and I can see the fear in his.

"I promise Christian" I vow.

"Now, I'd love for you to stay naked in my office all day but I wouldn't be able to get anything done" he laughs helping me off the couch.

We both get dressed before Christian tells Andrea she doesn't have to hold his calls any longer and he unlocks the door. Sitting at the table I find I am able to concentrate on the manuscripts in front me once again and while everything with Hyde is in the back of my mind it is no longer taking over. I'm vaguely aware of Christian talking on the phone, responding to emails and doing whatever he does as I get lost in the manuscript I'm reading.

"Ana?" Christian interrupts me some time later.

"Sorry" I say looking up.

"I'm having lunch delivered shortly but I have a meeting I need to get to. Andrea will bring in the lunch when it arrives, please don't wait for me to eat as my meeting may run long" he explains.

"Sure, thanks" I kiss him gently on the cheek.

"Mr. Grey, Ros is here to see you" Andrea interrupts through the intercom.

"Please send her in" Christian says.

"Christian – we need to review these numbers before the meeting…Oh! I'm sorry I didn't know you had someone in here" a tall, thin brunette walks into Christian's office.

"Ros, I would like you to meet my…girlfriend Anastasia" Christian introduces. "Ana, this is Ros my go to person at GEH."

"It's lovely to meet you" I shake her hand.

"Wow…I'm speechless" Ros says smiling. "Whatever you are doing, thank you."

"For?" I ask confused.

"For making him more bearable to be around" she laughs.

"Oh," I blush. "You're welcome."

"Enough Ros, let's review those numbers before the meeting starts" Christian walks over to his desk.

I tune Ros and Christian out trying to focus on the manuscript in front of me but I can't help but thinking about Christian calling me his girlfriend. We never talked about putting a title on what we're doing other than the dom/sub relationship we have in the bedroom which obviously we are not going to announce to the world. Thinking about it, he didn't introduce me to his mother with a specific title, maybe he has decided this is a fair description of what we are doing. I try not to focus on and it and return to my manuscript just before Andrea brings lunch in. The rest of the day goes my quickly, Christian remains in his meeting until well into the afternoon. I manage to get through the work I brought with me shutting down my laptop just as Christian announces that he is finished for the day as well.


	17. Chapter 17

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 17 APOV:**

Christian has spent most of the day in his office, trying to finalize a report for the Taiwan project he is working on again. When we came back to Escala last night Christian explained that the deal he was working on in Taiwan when we first met was finalized while he was there and that this is a similar project as they are hoping to expand the shipping yard they originally took over. Christian is not happy about the idea of having to return to Taiwan but it seems they will not deal with Ros as their preference is for all business matters to be handled by males.

"We should be leaving soon to my parent's" Christian walks into the bedroom as I'm walking out of the bathroom.

"I'll be ready in a few minutes" I say.

Christian disappears from the room as I begin to get dressed; I've chosen a simple sundress to wear tonight which is both casual and dressy. I'm nervous about having dinner at with his parents; no matter how many times Christian has told me not to worry I can't help but wonder if they will like me. I'm not sure why but it's important that they like and approve of me. I'm finishing my hair and a light coat of make up as Christian returns to the room.

"Come next to the bed" Christian says in his dom voice.

"Yes sir" I immediately comply, my eyes cast to the floor.

"Bend over, chest on the bed" he commands.

Again, I immediately comply with this request and I feel him lift my dress from behind me. He gently pushes my legs apart, before pushing my thong to my ankles as his hand quickly finds my sex. He rubs my clit which causes my juices to quickly start flowing. I can feel the orgasm slowly building as he continues to tease me.

"Christian?" I gasp at the sudden feeling of something cool and hard against my sex.

"Shhhhhh….relax" He says.

His hand pinches my clit, bringing my attention back to his actions. I feel him push the hard, cool object into me and quickly feel very full. It's quite a bit larger than the ben wa balls he has previously used but I can't determine what it is. He continues to rub and pinch my clit, my juices continue to coat the item that he pushes further inside of me. Quickly his hands leave my sex, he pulls my thong back up and lifts me off the bed bringing me against his body. He kisses me deeply and suddenly I feel the object vibrating inside of me.

"Christian!" I exclaim in surprise.

"I want you to keep this in tonight" he instructs. "I have a remote in my pocket that will control the vibrations. You are not to come without my permission."

"I….Christian…."I stutter.

"Is there a problem?" he asks in his dom voice.

"I'm concerned I may not be able to tolerate it all night" I say.

"If the vibrations become too much, use your safe word of yellow. If you say that I will immediately stop the vibrations which should allow you to cool down" he explains. "If you can't tell me because people are nearby, text me."

"Yes sir" I sigh.

"Do it for me and I will reward you tonight when we get home" Christian smiles.

"Yes sir" I blush.

Christian walks into his closet to start getting ready as I sit on the bed to put my shoes on and immediately feel the rather large object move inside of me. I can tell it is going to be a long night with this inside of me the entire time we are at his parent's house. Christian takes my hand, leading me down the steps where we great Taylor who is waiting by the elevator for us. I feel my face blush deeply as I feel the item lightly vibrating deep inside of me. I glare at Christian who smiles before stopping the vibrations.

"Christian?" I ask as Taylor pulls out of the garage.

"Hmmm?" he answers.

"Can I ask you something?" I say quietly.

"Of course" Christian turns so he is looking at me.

"When we were at your office, you introduced me to Ros as your girlfriend….I know we haven't talked about it but is that what we are…well I am?" I ask looking away.

"I don't know" he sighs. "I don't think there is a proper title for our relationship. I feel that we are more than boyfriend/girlfriend and more than just a dom/sub but I don't know what I would call it. Does it bother you that I introduced you as my girlfriend?"

"No!" I exclaim quickly. "I honestly don't know how else to define what we are but it felt nice to have you introduce me as your girlfriend."

"Yes it did" Christian smiles.

After a relatively short ride, we arrive at Christian's parent's home which has to be one of the largest homes I have ever seen. I am in awe as Taylor parks the car and we walk towards the front door; the landscaping and lighting accentuates the house even more. Christian's parents greet us in the foyer where Christian again introduces me as his girlfriend. We all sit in the great room, making small talk as we wait for dinner to be served. I meet Christian's cheerful, full of energy younger sister who practically talks my ear off while we're waiting. A few moments later Elliot and Kate join us, Kate quickly running towards me hugging me tightly. As Elliot greats me I feel the vibrations inside of me start, I quickly take a deep breath forcing myself to relax so no one can tell what is going on. I try to distract myself by catching up with Kate while Christian chats with Elliot.

"So you and Christian…" Kate asks.

"Yes" I blush. "I'm staying with him temporarily."

"What?! You're living with him?" She asks quite loudly.

"Shhhhh! Kate!" I hush her. "Someone broke into my apartment so Christian is letting me stay with him until the police can catch the person."

"Who was it?" she asks.

"A former employee that I fired a couple weeks ago" I explain. "He apparently is retaliating over his employment being terminated."

"Wow, that sucks Ana…I'm sorry" she says hugging me again.

"Thank you" I sigh just as Christian finally turns the vibrations off.

"Dinner is served" Grace leads us into the dining room.

We sit down at a very large, beautifully decorated table. Christian sits next to me, Elliot and Kate are directly across from us and Grace and Carrick are each at the end of a table. Conversation comes easily as food is being passed around the table; Elliot talks about his construction business and Christian discusses the Taiwan project he is working on.

"Ana how did you and Christian meet?" Grace asks.

"We were both in Taiwan actually" I smile. "We met at a bar in the hotel we were both staying in."

"And you were living in Seattle at the time?" she asks.

"No" I pause feeling the vibrations start up again. "I was living in New York at the time; I moved back to Seattle shortly before the ball you held."

"So you guys didn't see each other after you met in Taiwan until the ball?" Mia asks.

"No" I smile and quickly feel the vibrations increase in intensity.

"That's so sweet!" Mia gushes.

Christian begins a discussion with his dad about an upcoming political election and I find myself struggling to breathe through the intensity of the vibrations. I can feel myself getting very turned on by it and struggle because this is clearly not the place I want to be this worked up at. I squeeze Christian's thigh, trying to get his attention but he just squeezes my hand back never breaking his conversation with his dad.

_Yellow sir –A_

I type the text to Christian under the table knowing I can't take much more, before trying to return to the conversation between Mia and Kate. Suddenly I feel the vibrations stop, glancing at Christian I can see the guilt in his eyes. I give him a small smile letting him know I'm okay before taking a deep breath as my body finally comes down from the edge. Dinner concludes and moments later a homemade apple pie is served for desert.

"Thank you for inviting us for dinner" I shake hands with Grace and Carrick as we leave.

"Thank you for coming dear" Grace says.

"We hope to see you again" Carrick smiles.

"Good night," Christian says kissing both his parents on the cheek before walking me to the car where Taylor is waiting for us.

I've barely sat down when the vibrations start up again, this time with more intensity than before. I glare at Christian, but he continues to type away on his phone oblivious to my stare. A few moments later I grip his knee tightly as the vibrations don't stop and I find the orgasm building quickly. I need to remind myself that Taylor is in the car with us or I would say something to Christian. Just as the car is parked, the vibrations stop and I sigh in relief although my body doesn't come down as easily from the edge. The elevator arrives and three of us step in, Taylor entering the code to the penthouse as Christian pulls me close to him. My back is to Christian's front and I feel him grab my ass under my dress, exciting me further. Taylor is oblivious to what Christian is doing, his hands well hidden by my dress. His finger pulls my thong aside, exposing my sex just as the bell announces we have reached the penthouse. Taylor quickly leaves enters the penthouse; Christian pulls the back of my dress back down before ushering me off the elevator.

"Upstairs….I want you waiting for me" Christian instructs just as the vibrations start again.

I quickly make my way to the playroom, unlocking the door before undressing and kneeling in position waiting for Christian. The vibrations intensify moments before Christian walks through the door and I feel my sex gushing with excitement at the thought of the orgasm finally getting closer. Christian doesn't say a word but guides me to the bed, laying me on my back. He restrains my arms above my head before attach leather cuffs to my ankles. Just as I begin to wonder what he has planned, his pulls a blindfold from his pocket and covers my eyes. He pulls my leg above my head, attaching the cuff to some sort of rope or chain that must be attached to the bed just above my hand. He repeats the process with my other leg; my legs are spread wide apart both anchored securely above my head. My sex, ass and lower back are all off the bed in this position and although I should be embarrassed I find myself turned on even more not knowing what Christian has planned in this new position.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh" I moan as the vibrations intensify again.

Christian says nothing, but I feel him leave the bed and walk around the room. I am breathing so heavily as the orgasm builds and I'm on edge yet again tonight. I feel Christian return to the bed settling between my legs but moments pass without him touching me. I can feel him moving around the bed but I'm so turned on that all I want his for him to touch, to make me come.

"Christian….please" I beg as his hands run up and down my restrained legs.

"You look lovely like this" Christian sighs. "Like you are on display for me."

I blush deeply realizing what Christian is saying is probably true; my entire lower body is on display for him in this position. My mind is quickly brought back to the present when Christian gently blows on my clit, making me shudder in excitement. His finger rubs my clit gently, applying just enough pressure to push me closer to the edge.

"Christian….I'm so close…"I moan.

"Do you want to come?" he asks.

"Yes, sir! Please" I beg.

"Soon, very soon" he replies.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh" I feel something cool and wet against my anus.

"Oh God!" I scream as he pushes the object inside of me.

This is different than the last plug he used; it's harder and wider than before. His fingers continue to tease my clit as my body battles all the different sensations. The thing inside of me continues to vibrate, preventing me from ever coming down from the edge. My ass is being stretched around this thing; it's a combination of pleasure and pain that keeps me right there.

"Christian!" I scream as he pinches my clit.

"Tell me" he commands.

"I need to come….please let me come sir" I beg.

"Do you want to come like this?" he says pushing the item further into my ass.

"Ohhhhhhhhh…God….Christian!" I scream as I feel fuller than ever before.

"Does it turn you on?" he asks moving the item in and out of my ass.

"I…..it shouldn't….." I moan in ecstasy.

"But it does" he sounds pleased.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh" I say as he pushes the item further into me.

"Tell me" he instructs moving it slowly in and out of me.

"Yes!" I scream. "It feels good! I'm so close…please Christian!"

"Come when you can" he instructs as he starts moving the thing in and out of my ass faster.

"Oh God!" I scream as the sensations nearly become too much as Christian increases the pace.

"Christian….Ohhhhhhh" I moan as he suddenly slows down and gently moves it in and out of me.

"Tell me what you need to come" he requests.

"Christian…" I moan.

"Tell me" he repeats.

"Faster….Christian please….faster" I beg as his fingers continue to tease my clit.

"Like this?" he pushes the item in and out of me quickly.

"Yes! Oh God! Don't stop!" I scream.

"Come Ana!" He commands thrusting the item in me deeper.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh CHRISTIAN!" I scream as the orgasm rips through me.

Christian continues to move the item slowly in and out of my ass; I realize this is prolonging the orgasm as his fingers are no longer on my clit. I'm embarrassed at the way my body is reacting to anal play; I've always thought it was wrong but my body clearly feels otherwise. The continued movement in my ass prevents my body from completely coming down from the orgasm despite the power of it.

"Ohhhhhhhh" I moan as he suddenly removes the no longer vibrating object from my sex.

His hand continues to hold the item in my ass as he leans up kissing me deeply as his erection rubs against my opening. I want to touch him so bad, but seeing as I am fully restrained this is impossible. Suddenly the item from my ass is removed, and without warning he slams into my soaking sex. I scream in surprise and pleasure as this position has Christian in me deeper than before. He grips my thighs firmly as he plunges in and out of my sex; I can't do anything but accept the pleasure.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh" I moan as another orgasm quickly approaches.

"You feel so good Ana" he moans from above me. "I don't think I could ever get enough of you."

"Christian….don't stop….please" I beg turned on further by his words.

He quickly increases the pace and the intensity of his thrusts, nearly pulling all the way out of me before thrusting in me deeply. He continues this pace for several minutes before we are both moaning loudly; I can feel him swell deep inside of me moments before he commands me to come. Just as I find my release, I feel him burst inside finding his own release. He stays inside of me deeply, as he disconnects my legs gently moving them back to the bed. He unlatches my arms, removing the blindfold before collapsing on top of me.

"Hi" I say breathlessly.

"Hey" he whispers.

"That was intense" I admit.

"Do your legs hurt?" he asks.

"They feel like rubber right now" I laugh.

"Let's go to bed" Christian pulls out of me leaving me feeling empty.

He puts the silk robe on me again; I realize I have no idea how it gets in here since I always take it into his room with me but I've grown fond of it. It covers just enough to be modest but leaves me feeling sexy following a scene. Christian carries me bridal style to his room where we both wash up and climb into bed naked. He wraps his arms tightly around me as we cuddle in bed. We spend the entire night wrapped in each other's arms.

"I'd like you to work at GEH this week until Welsh figures out the security issue" Christian says over dinner the next day.

"Christian, I can't. I need to be at SIP to oversee things" I say.

"Please Ana" Christian begs.

"Maybe I can work at GEH a couple days, but I will need to at least go to the office to pick up things tomorrow morning" I sigh.

"I will have Andrea set up the office next to mine for you to use while you are at GEH" he smiles.

"It's only temporary Christian; I can't turn my life upside because of Jack Hyde" I say.

"I know Ana, but I need to know you're safe" Christian hugs me tightly.

**Several days later**

"Grey" Christian answers his phone as we sit down for breakfast. "Yes…we will be there shortly."

"Everything okay?" I ask.

"Welsh wants to meet with both of us at GEH" Christian says.

"Did he find Hyde?" I ask nervously.

"I don't know; he just wants to meet with us" Christian explains.

The ride to GEH is quiet; I'm nervous about what Welsh is going to tell us. There has been so little information on Hyde; according to Taylor they have someone watching his house and he hasn't been back there since my apartment was destroyed. Welsh had previously said there were no financial transactions indicating his movements but hopefully he found something that can help us figure out where Hyde is. Working at GEH this week has been interesting; I've seen Christian in CEO mode which is not all that different from his dom mode. He truly commands his office and seems to have the respect of all his employees. It has not been easy working at GEH given that almost everything I need is at SIP and I feel bad that Sawyer has had to make numerous trips back and forth to the office to pick or deliver things but Christian reassures me it's all for my safety.

"Good Morning Mr. Grey, Ms. Steele" Andrea greets us.

"Morning" we both say in unison.

"Andrea, can you let Welsh know that we are available to meet when he is?" Christian requests.

"Yes Mr. Grey" Andrea picks up the phone presumably to call Welsh.

"I'll see you in a few minutes" Christian kisses my cheek before walking into this office.

I get settled in what has quickly become my new office, although it's only temporary I have tried to make it as comfortable as possible. Sawyer has brought over some paintings from my apartment to hang up and I've picked up a couple house plants to liven the place up. Much like Christian's apartment, almost everything in his office building is completely white. I start up my computer and begin responding to a few emails when Christian walks in letting me know Welsh, Barney and Taylor are ready to meet with us.

"Good Morning Mr. Grey, Ms. Steele" Welsh greets us.

"Morning" Barney says.

"Good morning gentleman" I sit next to Christian at the large table.

"Gentleman, what do we have?" Christian begins the meeting.

"We received a package early this morning" Welsh begins.

"Wait? What? Here?" I interrupt.

"Yes" Welsh produces several pictures in sealed plastic bags.

Christian and I slowly look over all the pictures; they are mostly just of me and Sawyer however there is several of me with Christian. It looks like they are taken from further away than the previous pictures but it's still creepy to think that this guy is still following me.

"Did he drop them off here?" Christian asks.

"No," Barney says. "I have reviewed all the security tapes and he does not appear on any of them. The envelope arrived yesterday afternoon with our regular mail and as is standard protocol with all unusual packages it was immediately flagged as suspicious because it did not have a return address on it."

"Have we made any progress in finding Hyde?" I ask.

"Not yet Ms. Steele" Taylor says disappointed. "He has not returned to his house, we have someone watching it 24/7."

"There has been no activity on any bank accounts or credit cards" Welsh explains.

"So we have nothing" I sigh.

"Not exactly" Barney says. "I've been digging a little further into your network and servers at SIP and Seattle E books. I have installed a watch dog program which records everyone internet usage, sites visited, emails sent, etc. It does not slow computers down or delay the sending or receiving of any emails. There is one employee at SIP who routinely forwards SIP emails to a personal email account that is not located on SIP's server. Of the emails forwarded I have found two indicating the new security codes on the building that Stacy sent out."

"Who is the employee?" I ask.

"Elizabeth Morgan" Barney says.

"Do you know her?" Christian asks.

"Not off hand…I mean I'm sure I met her during a staff meeting but nothing about the name stands out" I answer after a few moments.

"According to what I can find, she is an editor at SIP where she has been employed for the last three years" Barney explains.

"You believe she is feeding Hyde the security information?" Christian asks.

"Yes" Barney says firmly. "I can't tell who accesses the personal email account she forwards the emails to but it is registered in her name. It would explain how Hyde was able to get into the building to put the envelope on Ms. Steele's desk without triggering the alarms."

"I will arrange for the termination of her employment" I announce.

"Actually, I wouldn't" Barney says.

"What? Why?" Christian asks alarmed.

"We think we could use her" Welsh speaks up.

"Use her?" I ask.

"We would feed her information that she would in turn feed to Hyde…we could set him up. Nothing that would place Ms. Steele in danger of course, but if we could get our hands on him we could hold him until the police arrive. According to the police they have enough evidence to charge Hyde with breaking and entering as well as destruction of property" Welsh explains.

"How would this work?" I ask.

"We were thinking that you would send an email to your editors letting them know you are working late one evening…maybe requesting they not set the alarm or something. Our hope is that Elizabeth then forwards the email to this personal account where Hyde then reads it. We expect he would come to SIP that night" Taylor outlines.

"I don't like this" Christian mumbles.

"What then?" I ask.

"We would have constant eyes on all entrances of the building and several security staff posted throughout the building. Barney has already installed security cameras throughout the building including at all entrances. We do not believe staff are aware of these cameras as they have not been notified of it" Taylor explains.

"What if he comes after Ana?" Christian asks.

"He won't be able to sir" Taylor answers. "We will grab him before he gets to her office, but in the event that he does, an armed member of the security team will be stationed in her office."

"Why does she need to be there?" Christian asks.

"We are afraid that if she leaves he will notice; it's likely he has eyes on the building" Taylor answers. "We plan to sneak security into the building disguised as workers and delivery men. One truck enters with a driver; instead of unloading office supplies, security men are unloaded. The truck leaves and if Hyde is watching the building he doesn't suspect anything."

"I don't know" Christian sighs.

"Let's do it" I say confidently.

"Ana, are you sure?" Christian asks.

"Christian, I'm done putting my life on hold because of him. Let's do this so we can move on" I answer.

"We will start getting everything in place and notify you when we are ready" Taylor says as everyone leaves the room.

"Ana, are you sure you want to do this? We can find another way-" Christian begins.

"No, we need to do this Christian. You heard Taylor, I will have security in my office so there is no chance of him getting to me" I say.

"I still don't like it" he wraps his arms around me.

"I know, but it will be fine" I reassure him.

"Come to Taiwan with me" Christian says a few minutes later.

"What?" I ask surprised.

"I have to go, I don't have a choice the deal isn't going through. Come with me" he says.

"When?" I ask.

"As soon as this bullshit with Hyde is done" Christian answers firmly.

"I don't know how long I can be away…" I say.

"It's only for a few days" Christian quickly replies. "Please Ana….let me take you away from all the craziness and the worry."

"I suppose I could take work with me to do while you're meeting with this company" I think aloud.

"Maybe we can visit the place we first met" Christian smirks.

"I'd like that" I remember those two nights fondly.


	18. Chapter 18

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 18 APOV:**

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Christian asks a few days later over dinner.

"Yes, I need to put an end to this bullshit once and for all" I say confidently.

"And you feel comfortable with everything?" Christian asks.

"Yes, Taylor and I have reviewed the plan several times. I sent an email letting everyone know that I am working late at SIP tomorrow so there is no need to set the alarm before leaving. Barney confirmed this email was forwarded to Elizabeth's personal email account only moments later" I answer.

"Andrea has everything booked for the trip to Taiwan next week" Christian explains a few minutes later. "We will leave on Sunday and should return Thursday; I have meetings scheduled on Monday afternoon and Tuesday morning. That leaves us plenty of play time…"

"Hmmmmmm" I kiss him.

"I need to go take care a few things before we go to bed. I'll be in my office," Christian stands up from the table.

"Ok" I say. "I have a few things to take care of as well."

Christian spends the next couple of hours in his study, I'm sure it's a combination of getting work done before we leave as well as his concern over everything planned for tomorrow. I've noticed he tends to shut down when he worries too much, preferring to be by himself than around others. I figure the best thing I can do right now is give him space, he isn't the only one nervous about tomorrow. I try to reassure myself that nothing is going to happen tomorrow; Taylor has been very thorough in covering all of our bases. Sawyer and Christian will both be in my office long before Hyde arrives; Taylor isn't happy that Christian is going to be there but Christian left him no choice. When I arrive tomorrow morning, I will have a stun gun and knife in my purse which will be placed in my desk in the event that Hyde makes his way to my office. Sawyer will be armed, as always, and Christian is relying on his kickboxing training should Hyde get to him.

"DAMN IT!" I hear Christian scream and something bounce of the wall in his office.

I laugh…Christian seems to enjoy taking his frustration out on inanimate objects. Ros has joked him about the number of phones he has ruined over the last few months alone just from his anger. I would be scared, but I know that Christian doesn't take his anger out on people; he would never hit me in anger. He has taken his frustrations out in the playroom, but nothing that ever resulted in me using a safe word.

"Christian?" I open his door slightly.

I can see he is on a conference call and his office is in shambles. I shut and lock the door behind me, but Christian doesn't seem to notice as his focus remains on the computer screen and listening to whoever is on the other line. I walk up next to Christian, glancing at the computer screen to make sure this isn't some type of a video conference before dropping to my knees in front of Christian's chair. He barely glances at me, but leans back in his chair as he talks on the phone. I unbuckle his belt, unbutton his pants and gently pull them down with his assistance. His erection isn't as hard as it normally is, but I can tell he is quickly getting aroused despite the stress and frustration from this call. He gasps as I take him completely into my mouth without touching him first. My tongue explores his erection, which is quickly hardening in my mouth. He puts his hand on the back of my head, holding me close to him as his erection lengthens in my mouth. Within seconds he is rock hard, hitting against the back of my throat but Christian doesn't allow me to move.

"Gentleman, we will continue this conversation in the morning something has come up that I need to take care of" Christian hangs up the phone.

"Ms. Steele….where were we?" he asks, pulling me slightly from his erection.

"Hmmmmmmmm" I moan around him.

He suddenly pulls my head down forcefully, his erection hitting the back of my throat hard causing me to gag. He holds me close, not allowing me to pull back; I struggle to relax my throat around him. My reflex kicks in; I swallow around him and the gagging stops. Just as I swallow, his hips thrust into my mouth further pushing him deeper into my throat. His balls bounce against my chin as he remains deep inside of me.

"You feel so good like this" he moans.

He moves my head back slightly, only to thrust back in deeply this time I'm expecting it and manage not to gag. This pace continues for what feels like forever, but is likely only a matter of minutes. I can hear his breathing increasing along with the pace of his thrusts; I know he won't last long.

"Oh God Ana….." he screams.

I feel him swell in my mouth as he pulls back a final time, thrusting harder and deeper into me than before. I quickly swallow as he thrust his hips up while pulling my head down screaming my name as he empties himself in my throat. I struggle to swallow but he holds my head in place so I have no choice but to take everything he is giving me. He holds me there for several minutes, slowly moving my head up and down as I continue milking him, his orgasm finally winding down.

"Wow" he pulls me up, kissing me deeply.

"Feel better?" I smile.

"You have no idea" he sighs. "I don't know how you knew, but that was exactly what I needed."

"You sounded like you were a little stressed out" I giggle.

"Come on, let's go to bed" he pulls his pants back up before we leave his office.

We head upstairs to Christian's bedroom, getting ready for bed before we crawl into bed naked. Christian wraps his arms around my waist, pulling my back to his front and I can tell by his breathing moments later that he is already fast asleep. We haven't talked about it but with Hyde likely getting caught tomorrow, the risk is gone so I will have no reason to continue staying here with Christian. I'm saddened by this fact; I've really enjoyed being around him all the time, even when he is stressed out about work. We have really become close these last few weeks, I don't know if we would have become so close had we not been living together. I don't know how Christian feels about me moving out, but he hasn't said he doesn't want me to. Unless he brings it up, if Hyde gets caught tomorrow and isn't granted bail I will move my stuff to my apartment when we return from Taiwan next week. I'm definitely going to miss falling asleep in Christian's arms.

"Nooooooooooooooo" A scream startles me a few hours later.

Christian is thrashing next to me, his arms and legs are flailing everywhere as he continues to moan. He is mumbling but I can't understand what he is saying; he continues to thrash about not responding when I call his name. I try to cuddle next to him, remembering it seemed to help last time but he is moving too violently for me to get close to him.

"CHRISTIAN!" I call his name louder.

"MOMMY! Help me please!" He begs. "Make him stop!"

My heart is breaking just hearing what he is going through. I sit up, shaking his shoulders and calling his name but still get no response. Christian rolls onto his back but his arms continue to flail about as if he is trying to hit someone or something.

"Mommy! It hurts" He cries out.

I need to do something, I cannot bear to hear him in this nightmare – it's killing me thinking of what he must be remembering. I've seen the scars on his chest and back; I've assumed he experienced some type of physical abuse as a child but he has never mentioned it. His legs stop moving as he continues to sob and try to push something away. I take brief pause in his movements to try something to wake him up; knowing I could likely get thrown off the bed and hurt but I need to do something and nothing is working right now. I climb on top of him so I am straddling his hips; I take his wrists firmly in my hands and placing them next to his head. He struggles against me for a few minutes but as I tighten my grip on his wrists and around his thighs he begins to stop thrashing.

"Christian?" I call his name as he quiets down.

"OWWWWWWWWWW!" He screams out suddenly, nearly pushing me off of him.

I hold him down again, gently running my lips along his cheek as he sobs. I bravely put my lips against his, hoping this doesn't startle him too much more. I'm trying to keep my chest off of his, but it's not the easiest thing to do while holding him down.

"MOMMY! HELP ME!" he sobs.

"Christian! Baby, wake up" I whisper gently into his ear.

I feel his body relaxing under mine as I continue to whisper his name in his ear, reassuring him that he is okay and no one is going to hurt him.

"Christian….wake up" I whisper.

"Oh Ana," he sobs into me and I quickly release his arms.

His arms engulf me, pulling me close to him, holding me as if he is afraid I'm going to leave him. I can hear him silently crying which breaks my heart further. I want so badly for him to talk to me about his nightmares but he never seems to want to discuss it.

"She didn't stop him" he sobs.

"Oh baby" I whisper, holding his head close to me not knowing what else to do.

"She didn't love me enough to stop him" he cries. "Why didn't she stop him?"

"I don't know Christian" I sigh.

"If she loved me she wouldn't let him burn me with his cigarette!" He says angrily as I feel him tense below me.

"Shhhhhh….it's not your fault" I try to comfort him.

"Maybe I wasn't good enough…that's why didn't love me" he whispers.

"There is nothing wrong with you Christian" I assure him. "I love you."

"What? No….if she couldn't love me how could you?" he questions.

"Baby….I don't know what was wrong with her that she couldn't protect you but there is nothing wrong with you" I say.

"There must be…why else would a mother not love her own child?" he asks.

"Maybe there was something wrong with her that prevented her from protecting you, but baby there is nothing wrong with you. You are a kind, gentle, compassionate, loving man whom is doing everything possible to protect me" I answer.

"But…." He sighs.

"But nothing Christian" I interrupt. "This is not about you, this is about her."

"Oh Ana" he pulls me closer to him, hugging me tightly.

"Shhhhhhhh…" I whisper into his ear. "Everything is going to be okay, they can't hurt you anymore. I won't let anyone hurt you again Christian."

"Don't leave me Ana" he begs.

"I'm not going anywhere" I assure him, deeply touched by his request. "I love you Christian."

"Noooooooooo you can't" he whispers.

"I do Christian….and I know you feel it" I say confidently. "The connection we have, that we have had from the first night in Taiwan…I know you feel it too."

"I do" he admits.

"Did you ever feel the connection with the other subs you tried while we were apart?" I ask, already knowing the answer.

"No, I couldn't….I wasn't able to perform with them" he blushes in admission.

"You don't seem to have a problem performing with me" I smile.

"No," he sighs.

"You know as much as I do what we have is much more than a dom/sub relationship" I point out.

"You will never be just a sub to me" he says firmly.

"And why is that?" I prompt.

"I don't know" he sighs. "I feel so connected with you, I could never see you as someone I just fuck. With you it's more than just sex."

"Because you have feelings for me" I add.

"Yes" he admits quietly.

"I know that for whatever reason you don't think I can love you, but I do" I smile against him, kissing his cheek as he holds me tighter.

"I….I love you too Ana" He whispers.

My heart nearly stops at his realization; never did I expect to be having this conversation with him anytime soon. I think I've known for some time now that I loved him; I didn't want to admit it fearing that it would complicate things between us. Christian pulls my head up, looking deeply in my eyes before his lips find mine. This kiss is different; it's full of emotion as if we are both trying to convey our love for one another without words. His hands roam my body; I quickly remember we are both completely naked as I feel his erection start to stir beneath my sex. When I climbed on top of him during his nightmare I paid little attention to where I sat, focusing more on making sure I didn't touch his chest. Since he woke up from his nightmare though he's been holding me against his chest tightly, I realize.

"Ana….I need you" he moans grinding my sex against his now rock hard erection.

"I'm yours Christian" I rock my hips against him.

He lifts me up, bringing my nipple to his mouth; he sucks hard and the feeling immediately goes straight to my sex. I can feel myself getting wetter by the minute as I rock against him, feeling how much he needs me. I reach between us, grasping his erection and guiding him to my drenched sex. He moans as I slowly push my hips down allowing him to slip into me. No matter how many times he is inside of me, I never get used to how large he is; I feel him stretching me as I take him in deeper.

"You feel so good" he moans.

"Only for you" I assure him.

I slowly move against him, bringing him slowly in and out of me as he kisses me deeply, our tongues exploring each other's mouths. I can feel the orgasm quickly building; I moan loudly as Christian lifts me up moving himself in and out of me faster with more intensity.

"Ohhhhhhhhh" I moan. "You feel amazing."

"You are so tight….I love the way you grip me" his words nearly push me over the edge.

"Come for me baby" he says.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream as the orgasm takes over.

Christian continues moving in and out of me but at a slower pace allowing me to ride out my orgasm. After a few moments, he quickly rolls us over so he is on top of me never breaking our connection. My legs wrap tightly around his waist, pulling him deeper into me needing to feel him closer to me. He takes my hands in his, pulling them above my head as he begins to thrust into me slow and deep. His eyes never leave mine, making our connection so much stronger as I can truly see how strongly he feels for me. Christian continues at the slow, deep pace for some time and I can feel another orgasm building again. I am truly surprised at the intensity of my body's reactions with Christian; nearly every time we have been together I have had multiple orgasms. I don't know if it's Christian's body or this emotional connection we have had but I never felt anything like this before.

"Oh God" I moan as Christian thrusts deeply into me.

"Come with me baby…I want you to come with me" Christian begs.

He thrusts into me several more times before I feel him swell inside; knowing he is close to find his own release triggers mine and I scream in pleasure as I feel him release himself in me. He rolls us back over so I am resting on his chest, never breaking our connection. His arms wrap around me tightly, holding me close to him as our breathing slowly returns to normal. I glance at the clock, realizing we have to be up in a few hours for work before closing my eyes listening to Christian's heartbeat. Christian must sleep peacefully the remainder of the night because when I wake up later we are in the same position we fell asleep in. Looking at the clock I see we have at least an hour before the alarm is going to go off; I'm surprised I'm awake already given the events of the night before. I begin to wonder why I'm awake, when I feel Christian twitch inside of me and suddenly the realization of what woke me up is clear. Feeling Christian twitching inside of me is a feeling I don't think I could ever get used to. I squeeze myself around him, which results in an immediate response of him hardening inside of me. The unexpected movement quickly turns me on; I gently rock my hips against him several times and until he is fully erect inside of me.

"Hmmmmmmmm….I could get used to waking up like this" he moans.

"Me too" I kiss him deeply, rocking against him.

"I love waking up inside of you" he pushes me up so I'm sitting on top of him.

"Ohhhhhhhh" I moan, this position has him deep inside of me.

"Ride me baby" he says.

Christian plays with my nipples as I move myself up and down against his hard erection. I start of slow, but quickly increase the pace as I feel the orgasm rapidly approaching. Christian pulls me slightly forward, resting my hands in his chest; moving up and down against him in this position puts more pressure on my clit.

"Oh baby" I yell as he pinches my nipples roughly.

"Not yet….come with me again" he says.

"I'm so close" I beg.

"No…not yet" he moans.

"Harder and deeper" he instructs.

I comply with his request, nearly lifting myself off of him before slamming back down which pushes me almost to the edge. His hand is firm against my hip encouraging me to continue this pace while his other alternates between rubbing and pinching my nipples. I'm thankful when I hear his breathing increase knowing he is close to his own release as I don't think I can last much longer.

"Come with me Ana!" He screams.

We both scream out in passion together as we find out release.

"Christian?" I say a few minutes later.

"Yeah?" he asks.

"Can I ask you something?" I whisper.

"Anything" he says.

"When we first met in Taiwan you told me not to touch your chest and your back" I pause. "But…."

"You're the only one" he interrupts. "No one has ever been able to touch me like you have. Having you here, laying on top of me right now just feels so right."

"No one?" I ask surprised.

"No" he answers.

"What happened to her?" I ask, hoping he doesn't shut down.

"She overdosed on drugs when I was four, her pimp found me with her dead body" he shudders below me at the memory. "I was taken to the emergency room severely malnourished where Grace was the doctor on duty. Her and Carrick adopted me shortly thereafter."

"It was her pimp who hurt you?" I ask.

"Yes" he sighs.

"I'm so sorry Christian" I kiss him.

"Let's not talk about it please" he begs.

"How about we take a shower?" I suggest.

After an eventful night and morning with little sleep, Christian and I get ready for work and the day ahead of us. Today is the day we are going to try to catch Hyde; I'm not nearly as nervous as I thought I would be. I think it's likely because nothing is going to happen until closer to the end of the day; we don't expect him to be stupid enough to show up when there is an office full of people. As the morning progresses, Christian and I get ready in silence both of us clearly thinking about later today.

"Good Morning Mr. Grey, Ms. Steele" Taylor enters the kitchen.

"Taylor, please call me Ana" I insist.

"Yes Ana" he sighs clearly not entirely comfortable calling me by my name. "Would you like to review the plan for today again?"

"I think I understand it" I say. "Sawyer is taking me directly to SIP this morning under the disguise of a staff meeting this morning. Christian is going to happen to stop by with lunch today as a surprise. I'm going to send Stacy home early so she won't know if Christian leaves or not. Christian will spend the remainder of day in the office with me. Around four the delivery truck will arrive where you will meet the additional security who are working tonight."

"Correct" he agrees. "Barney will be monitoring all cameras from GEH throughout the day, he has facial recognition software being ran on every person who walks through every entrance of the building. This will immediately alert him to Hyde's entrance."

"I still don't like this" Christian grumbles.

"It'll be fine Christian" I squeeze his hand.

"Are you ready to head out?" Taylor asks.

I glance at Christian and nod, this is when we go our separate ways but I know it will only be a matter of hours until I see him again. Christian pulls me against him, kissing me deeply before he leaves with Taylor. Sawyer and I leave a few moments later heading to SIP, I haven't spent an entire day here since the pictures were delivered to my office. Stacy has been wonderful at keeping me up to speed with everything and thankfully Sawyer has been back and forth between the two offices making the transition easier.

"Good morning Ms. Steel" Stacy greets me.

"Morning Stacy" I reply.

"The editors are in the board room waiting for you" she says.

The meeting lasts for a couple hours as each editor presents their recommendations for publishing this month as the others provide their feedback. Ultimately I review any manuscript that doesn't have everyone's full support in publication and make the final decision. We all agree with most of the manuscripts presented which leaves me three to take with me to Taiwan next week to review while Christian is in his meetings and while on the plane.

_Forgot to tell you I love you –C_

_I love you too –A_

I smile at the simple text from Christian, thinking how far we have come in the last few months. We have only been together a short time, but since I've been staying with him we have become so much closer. Last night was a moment I will never forget; from the heart breaking nightmare Christian had to his confession that he didn't think anyone could love him because his own mother couldn't to our confession of love for each other. We made love for the first time that night although thinking back I think we've made love before without the confession of emotions. I think we have a nice balance between our time in the playroom and our time in the bedroom; I like that Christian isn't in dom mode every time we are intimate. I don't think I'd be able to handle that.

"Ms. Steele?" Stacy interrupts my thoughts.

"Yes?" I ask.

"Mr. Grey is here to see you" she smiles.

"Oh, what a nice surprise! Please send him in" I try to act surprised.

"I brought you lunch Ms. Steele" Christian smiles walking in.

"Wonderful! I'm starving" I laugh as I close the door behind him.

"Everything okay?" he asks kissing me.

"Yes…it should be quiet for another few hours" I sigh.

"There's still time to change your mind" he suggests.

"No, we need to do this. I want Hyde caught once and for all" I say firmly.

"I just hope he isn't granted bail" Christian replies.

"One step at a time, first let's get him arrested" I say.

"Then onto Taiwan" he smiles.

"Hmmmmm" I moan at the memory of our time there.

"You keep moaning like that I just might take you here" he says pulling me from my thoughts.

"Shhhhh….these walls are too thin!" I exclaim.

"You're lucky I have work to do" he smirks.

We spend the next couple of hours working, neither of us discussing what is going to happen tonight. I think we are both avoiding it; there's not much more to talk about anyway. We have gone over the plan several times; I see Christian constantly checking his phone and I can only assume Taylor is keeping in contact with him about everything going on.

"Stacy?" I open my door.

"Yes Ms. Steele?" she asks.

"Can you fax these, mail out these envelopes and then file these? Once you are done, you can leave and get an early start on your vacation" I request.

"If you don't mind Ms. Steele, that would be wonderful! I'm not quite packed for my trip yet" she admits.

"No problem, enjoy your week off" I say closing my door.

Christian types away on his phone again, likely informing Taylor that Stacy will be leaving shortly. I glance at the clock…we should have at least two more hours before most of the staff start heading out. I've noticed everyone tends to leave around four on Fridays, which is fine with me as long as everything is done. There are a few editors who stick around closer to five but I don't expect anyone here beyond that time.


	19. Chapter 19

_All characters belong to E.L. James_.

**Chpt. 19 CPOV:**

I'm sitting in Ana's office at SIP desperately trying to get work done but I can't concentrate worth anything. My mind keeps running through all the things that could go wrong today; I'd be devastated if anything ever happened to Ana. As I watch her reading a manuscript on her desk, I can't help but think about everything that happened last night. It started with what was probably one of my worst nightmares yet, no matter what she did I couldn't wake up. When I did, I was overcome with emotion – Ana's arms around me nearly broke me. I couldn't believe I cried in front of her! I never cry! I've never talked with anyone about my thoughts that my mother didn't love me and that was why she didn't protect me. Dr. Flynn has tried to get me to discuss it, but I've always refused. I don't know if it was the dream or Ana holding me last night that had me opening up to her. She shocked the hell out of me when she admitted she loved me. How could she possibly love me? I knew in that moment that the feelings I had been having for her weren't just feelings…it was actually love. That didn't shock me as much as hearing Ana tell me she loved me. I didn't think anyone could love me, but looking in Ana's eyes I knew she loved me. I made love to her for the first time last night; for the first time admitting what I felt for her was love. Waking up inside of her this morning was the best feeling in the world, I can't imagine waking up any other way.

_Delivery truck has arrived and is being unloaded –T_

_Very good –C _

"Mr. Grey, Ms. Steele" Sawyer interrupts us.

"Please come in" Ana says.

"Everything is in place, now we just wait" he glances out the window I'm not sure at what…maybe just making sure nothing suspicious is there.

"Are you okay baby?" I pull Ana into a hug.

"No" she whispers. "I don't like not having control over anything-"

"Well sometimes you do" I smirk, trying to joke with her.

"Besides then" she smiles at me, but the smile doesn't reach her eyes. "I don't like not knowing what is going to happen, to have it feel like everything is spinning out of control."

"I know, Ana" I sigh. "I feel the same way."

"When this is all over tonight, will you take my mind off of everything?" she begs.

"I will keep your mind off of this for as long as you can handle me baby" I smile, trying to distract her even for a few moments.

"Ms. Steele, if I can use your computer I can turn on the video feed" Sawyer interrupts us.

We step aside allowing Sawyer to press a few buttons on Ana's computer which quickly changes the screen from her email into a several different boxes all with feeds from various cameras. He hits another button which allows the screen to project onto the wall giving us a larger but slightly distorted view. I glance at my watch seeing that it is almost five; I pull Ana tighter against me. My heart is beating so fast right now, I'm sure Ana can feel it as her back rests against mine. After several minutes of just standing there, Ana and I sit in chairs just waited. I hate waiting! I wish I could catch the fucker right now and get this over with. I hate seeing Ana in fear, but there is nothing I can do until Hyde surfaces.

"Mr. Grey, Ms. Steele we have movement" Sawyer pulls me from my thoughts pointing at the screen.

Ana stands up, squinting her eyes to get a better look at the figure we see approaching the rear entry of the building. Not satisfied with this view, she moves to the computer screen before confirming it is Hyde. We watch him quickly enter the building, moving through several hallways before reaching the main area outside of our office. I can see Taylor and several other members of security in various spots throughout our floor.

"The police are on their way" Sawyer announces.

With a warrant out for Hyde the police were called to pick him up. We were unable to notify them ahead of time since they typically don't take kindly to setting up criminals, since it could look bad in court. However since they are not part of this sting, it isn't a concern; they are simply being notified that we have him in our building. Suddenly, we see Taylor turning around walking away from the camera talking to someone. There is no view of who he is talking to so we can't be sure, but we suddenly see his feet at the bottom of the camera.

"Sawyer what happened?" I demand.

"I don't know sir" Sawyer tries calling for Taylor through his earpiece and on his phone with no answer.

We can still see Hyde on the camera, he is walking through the hallway, occasionally going through offices. We watch him search through desks and cabinets in several offices; it's not known what he is looking for but we never see him take anything. He doesn't take anything from the offices but throws papers around and knocks computers on the floor.

"Mr. Grey, Ms. Steele, please move into the corner" Sawyer instructs.

"Come on Ana" I pull her against me, seeing that she is not moving.

Ana continues to stare at the wall, watching the live feed of Hyde going through the offices.

"Ana!" I call to her.

"What?" she finally looks away.

"Look at me" I instruct, my voice in dom mode. "We will get through this, we will all be fine."

"But Taylor…." She worries.

"He will be fine" I say firmly. "I need you to concentrate right now, listen to whatever Sawyer or I tell you. Understood?"

"Yes sir" she says quickly.

I didn't want to do this, but she was so preoccupied that I had to pull her out of it somehow. I should have picked up on her words earlier; I've noticed with Ana that when things are spinning out of control for her is when she seems to need a scene the most. Although we are not clearly going to engage in a sexual scene right now, I can at least play the dom to see if that helps her; the rest we can deal with once this mess is over. If she needs to hear my dom voice to keep her in the moment then so be it; right now I need her focused so Sawyer and I can keep her safe.

BANG Suddenly we hear a gunshot.

"Christian?" Ana asks worried.

"Sawyer?" I ask.

"Working on it sir" he says before talking into his ear piece.

"Elizabeth is here" Ana says.

"How do you know?" I ask.

"It's the only explanation" she pauses. "Taylor was injured while we could see Hyde so it wasn't him. What if Elizabeth is in the building?"

"I believe she is right sir" Sawyer interrupts. "We have confirmation of a woman in the building fitting Ms. Morgan's description; I have two people trying to find her now."

Suddenly Hyde is gone from the cameras; one of our cameras is no longer showing a live feed. Sawyer rewinds the footage to try to determine what happened but the camera shows nothing, leading us to think that whatever took out the occurred from outside the hallway where this camera is angled. We have lost any visible feed of Hyde which infuriates me even more – I knew this was a bad idea.

"Barney! What the hell is going on?" I say as he picks up.

"It seems the lines are being cut from in the building sir. The battery backup should kick in shortly" he replies.

"It better" I end the call.

We watch as another guard is taken down, but just like with Taylor we can't see the person who is doing it. Sawyer announces that the police are moments away and have been alerted that shots have been fired by Barney who is watching everything unfold on his monitors. I pull Ana closer to me, she wraps her arms around my waist and I can feel her heart racing against my chest. I would do anything to take this feeling away from her, but for right now there is nothing I can do but try to protect her. This seems like more than retaliation for Ana firing Hyde but neither of us can find another reason for the hatred he obviously feels for Ana. Nothing in Ana's history suggested she knew Jack previously; we ran a thorough background check on him as well and there was no link other than SIP to Ana. If this isn't retaliation for Ana firing him what could it be for? What could Ana have done to this man in such a short period of time to have him react so badly.

"Christian" Ana gestures to the live feed, showing Hyde only a few feet from Ana's office.

"It's okay, Ana" I try to reassure her although I don't know what I believe my words.

"I love you Christian" she whispers in a shaky voice.

"I love you Ana" I assure her.

We hear and see a scuffle outside Ana's office, where Elizabeth Morgan finally comes into the screen. She is waving a gun around frantically as Hyde is yelling at her; they don't seem to be on the same page with what is going on and he looks very angry. Sawyer indicates for us to keep still and be quiet, although everything inside of me is telling me to run and take care of both of them. Sawyer is positioned just to the side of the door with his gun drawn.

BANG

We watch Elizabeth drop to the floor, as a shot from somewhere hits her in the leg. Hyde had a gun drawn but I don't think it was him who shot her as his aim looked higher from the camera angle. Quickly two of our security guards come into view but Elizabeth manages to get her gun and hits one of them as Hyde knocks the other unconscious with the handle of his gun. The door to Ana's office suddenly opens and Hyde is standing there looking furiously at Ana in my arms.

"Drop your gun or I will shoot" Sawyer tells him.

"Do it" Hyde replies.

BANG

Sawyer fires hitting Hyde in the shoulder, but Hyde barely flinches. It's as if he is high on something, or psychotic because he seems very out of it. Hyde just stands there glaring at Sawyer as he quickly makes a move for Sawyer's gun.

BANG

Sawyer drops to the ground hitting his head on the desk in the process, but I don't think Hyde shot him as he looks almost as surprised. I can see Sawyer was shot in the leg, he is unconscious on the floor next to Ana's desk but I can tell he is breathing from here. I can't see where the shot came from as Hyde is blocking the door but I can only guess it was Elizabeth. I'm afraid to look at the live feed and risk taking my eyes off of Hyde especially in his crazed state right now.

"What do you want?" I ask firmly.

"That beautiful bitch in your arms for starters. I want to fuck her until she is screaming my name so loud that you will hear it every night in your dreams!" he screams. "Then, I want everything you have Grey!"

"Not before you rot in hell Hyde!" Ana glares at him.

"How much?" I ask.

"Not your money….I want your life. I want you to suffer the way you made me suffer for more than twenty years" he yells.

"What the fuck are you talking about?! I've never met you!" I say, now convinced this man has lost his mind.

"You liar!" he screams, pointing the gun at Ana's head.

BANG

I squeeze Ana tightly not knowing where the shot came; I can feel Ana gasp in my arms. As I see Hyde fall to the ground, I slowly let out a sigh. Behind Hyde, Taylor stands with his gun drawn as Elizabeth lays unconscious at his feet. Taylor quickly handcuffs Hyde who is bleeding excessively all over Ana's office yet he continues to yell at me despite the gunshot wounds. Taylor hits him on the head with his gun and Hyde quickly passes out ending the screaming. We hear police sirens in the background as Taylor pulls Sawyer to his feet putting him in Ana's desk chair before wrapping up his leg effectively stopping the bleeding.

"It's over baby" I whisper into Ana's ear.

"Finally" she sighs in relief her voice no longer as shaky as before.

A couple of hours later we are cleared to go home as Hyde and Elizabeth are taken into custody and we have provided our statements to the police. Hyde is taken to Seattle Grace Hospital although the paramedics said he likely won't make it since he lost so much blood from both shots. Elizabeth's injury was much less severe and they expect her to make it; she is already going to be charged with attempted murder, accessory to attempted murder and breaking and entering since Barney was able to pull a shot of her entering SIP through a window in a file room. Sawyer is also taken to the hospital however the paramedics said the bullet just grazed his leg and he had regained consciousness before the ambulance pulled away. Taylor refuses to go to the hospital for the stab wound that Elizabeth inflicted; I convince him to at least let the paramedics bandage him up and stop the bleeding. The other two security team members are taken to the hospital for observation but will likely be released within twenty four hours.

"Sir, ma'am…we should head to the car through the back entrance as the paparazzi are everywhere" Taylor instructs.

"Taylor you can't drive" I say firmly.

"Sir-" Taylor begins.

"Taylor, you can barely stand up let alone drive a car. Absolutely not, it's not safe" I interrupt.

"I will drive" Ana speaks up.

"Ana, I-" I stutter trying to find the words.

"Christian it's fine. You need to help Taylor to the car anyway, with me driving we will be able to get out quicker" Ana explains her voice now strong and steady.

"Are you sure you're okay to drive?" I ask concerned.

"I'm fine…let's go" Ana leads us out of her office, carefully stepping over the blood stained carpet.

I make a mental note to have a crew in here and the carpet changed before Ana returns to the office next week. I don't care the cost; I will have the place looking better than it did this morning when all her employees arrive on Monday morning. They cannot walk in and see blood stains, bullet holes and shattered computers. Reluctantly, Taylor leans on me for support walking clearly in pain with every movement. As soon as we open the back entrance we are momentarily blinded by flashes from reporters as they yell questions at us.

"Mr. Grey! Mr. Grey! What happened here tonight?" One report yells.

"What is your connection to Ms. Steele?" Another yells.

"Was Jack Hyde an ex-boyfriend of Ms. Steele?" Another reporter yells and I'm tempted to punch his lights out but Ana grabs my hand squeezing it as we walk through the crowd to the car.

Ana quickly unlocks the doors, jumping into the driver's seat and starting the car as I help Taylor ease into the SUV. I hate to admit it but Ana was right, it would have taken more time if I had driven as Ana could never had assisted Taylor into the car.

"Mom? I need a favor" I quickly dial the phone.

"Of course dear, what is it?" Mom asks quickly.

"Can you come over to Escala as soon as possible? Taylor has been stabbed and refused to go to the hospital" I explain.

"Oh my…I will be there shortly" she disconnects.

"Sir-" Taylor says.

"Don't start Taylor" I interrupt. "I may not have been able to force you to go to the hospital but I am requiring you to let my mother evaluate you as a condition of your continued employment with me."

"Yes Mr. Grey" he smirks, knowing full well I would never fire him.

I quickly send a text to Gail alerting her to my mother's arrival in case she is at Escala before we get there. Ana does a wonderful job getting us out of the parking lot quickly considering the amount of reports and news vehicles that are desperately trying to block our exit. I send another email to my head of public relations requesting she draft a press release about the incident tonight. I need to talk to Ana but there is no way that our relationship will not be public now. I'm requesting the press release spin this was an irate former employee who turned on Ana in retaliation for the termination of his employment. I fire off another email to Welsh asking him to dig deeper in the connection between myself and Jack Hyde; previously we were focusing on his connection to Ana since his anger seemed to be focused on her however his allegations have me wondering if there isn't some connection between us.

We arrive at Escala a short time later and manage to get Taylor upstairs into the great room as Gail and my mother come rushing in. Gail immediately drops her professional face, running to Taylor's side to comfort him and check on him. Gail and Taylor have been dating for some time now, although both are usually very cautious and keep their relationship confined to their quarters however given the situation it's understandable that Gail's emotions take over. My mother quickly assess Taylor, who again refuses to go to the hospital and stitches his cut up which had apparently started bleeding again after we left SIP. She advises him to take it easy for the next ten days including no heavy lifting or physical activity. Taylor tries to argue however Gail quickly puts an end to it and reassures my mother that she will see that he follows her orders. She promises to stop by in the next few days to check on Taylor again before leaving for the night. I know she wants to ask me what happened but I promise her that we will stop by tomorrow and explain everything as right now we just need to unwind from the events of the day. I also want to get my dad's legal advice on the situation with Hyde and Elizabeth as well as any concerns he might have about my security staff who defended us by shooting both Elizabeth and Hyde.

As my mom leaves I take a moment to watch Ana; this entire time she has been operating in CEO mode which is very sexy to watch. She has been walking around the penthouse full of confidence, assisting my mom as needed and just now helping Gail move Taylor to their quarters before bringing them both a cup of hot tea. With everything going on and everything that just happened, instead of focusing on the negative she is putting everyone else's needs first. I realize this is likely a way to keep her mind off of what just happened but I can't help but watch in amazement at the way she handled everything.

"Ana, would you like to go to bed?" I ask as she puts away puts away the tea bags.

"I don't think I can sleep" she admits.

"Would a shower help? Or a hot bath?" I suggest.

"I don't think so" she frowns.

"What do you need baby?" I ask.

"The playroom" she whispers.

"Are you sure? It's been such a long day-" I start to say.

"Please Christian….I can feel myself crashing soon and I don't want to think of everything that just happened. I know I won't be able to sleep; every time I stop moving right now I keep replaying what happened. Please just make me forget everything for a little while" she begs.

"Only if you are sure this is what you want Ana" I say after a moment.

"I am" she says confidently.

"Go upstairs and meet me in the playroom" I say in my dom voice.

I start planning our scene in my head, trying to decide where to take us tonight. We have not been to my playroom in the last couple of weeks which surprises me when I think about it. I have been completely satisfied with Ana in my bedroom, or in my office, with no toys. We will maintain a certain level of BDSM in some of those situations but at other times it's been vanilla sex. I'm surprised to find that I enjoy both acts similarly with Ana; there are times I feel the need to have control in which BDSM is very rewarding but there are times when it is not needed and sex at that time is just as rewarding. I'm not overly surprised that Ana feels she needs a scene right now; I know for the both of us tonight was very overwhelming and the entire situation was out of control. We had no reason to suspect that Elizabeth would return to SIP tonight after she had already left for the day which completely took us by surprise. Before going up to the playroom, I pause and check on Gail and Taylor who both insist they do not need anything. I give them both the next week off, seeing that Ana and I will be flying to Taiwan on Thursday we will not need any of their services. I offer to send them somewhere to relax but they both refuse, stating they would rather stay at Escala. Taylor tries to insist he should accompany me to Taiwan but with Hyde and Elizabeth both in the hospital I don't see a need for security.

After talking with Gail and Taylor, I finally make my way up to the playroom where I am surprised to see Ana is waiting for me in the standard sub position completely naked. Given the amount of time that passed I expected her to have moved to the bed or at least the couch, her knees must be killing her. I quickly strip down to my underwear, needing to free my massive erection that was restricted by my pants the moment I walked into the room and saw Ana naked waiting for me.

"Ana, I'm sorry I took so long" I pull her hair back and tie it back so it's not in our way tonight. "Are your legs sore?"

"A little sir" she answers quickly, her eyes remaining fixed on the ground.

"You may stand" I request and she immediately complies. "Do you remember your safewords?"

"Yellow and red sir" she says.

"Very good, please remember to use them if the scene becomes too much" I remind her.

"Yes sir" she replies.

I walk around her, taking her beautiful body in slowly as I view her from every angle. I hear her breath hitch as she realizes I'm looking her over very slowly. I step behind her back, causing her to gasp as I take her full, plump breasts in my hands massaging them while grinding my hard erection against her ass. I feel her nipples harden at my touch, even before I begin playing with them, telling me how turned on she is right now. Her body is always so responsive to me, to my touch even just to my voice. I lead her over to the couch sitting her down before kneeling in front of her and pulling her firm ass to the end of the couch.

"Hold your knees" I instruct before lowering my mouth onto her sex.

"Ahhhhhhhhh" she moans as I begin exploring her sex with my mouth.

I take my time exploring her, tasting her; nibbling and sucking on her folds, circling her opening with my tongue and every few minutes nipping her clit with my teeth. Her body is quickly responding, her walls clenching whenever I come close to her core. Her juices are flowing at out of her, my tongue desperately tries to lap them up before they slide down her ass.

"Play with your nipples" I order before taking her clit into my mouth.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh Gooooooooooooooood!" she moans as she pinches her nipples.

She is still a little cautious when it comes to pleasuring herself however she is slowly becoming more comfortable during scenes. I love that innocent part of her; I don't know how I would handle a sub who was already established and comfortable with herself and the lifestyle. The couple times I tried to have a scene with a sub at the club it turned out to be a disaster; I wasn't able to maintain an erection to save my life. With Ana though all it takes is her entering a room and I find myself immediately getting hard. When I first decided to become involved in BDSM never did I think I would have fallen in love with someone who was my sub; well Ana's not your typical sub but she is a sub in the playroom. I love that we have a more typical relationship outside of the playroom while still maintaining our lifestyle in the playroom. I can't wait to get her to Taiwan; I have a couple surprises planned for her that I'm eager for her to see.

"Christian!" she screams pulling me from my thoughts.

"What do you need baby?" I smirk against her throbbing sex.

"I need to come! Please sir, please let me come!" she begs.

"Come Ana!" I command thrusting my tongue deep inside her core.

"FUCK!" she screams as she comes hard in my mouth.

I can feel her walls clenching around me, holding onto my tongue as if she is afraid I will remove it from her. Her juices flow, I pull her closer to me lapping up the sweet taste that I have become addicted to. After a few moments her breathing returns to normal, but I don't stop…instead I move my mouth back to her clit nipping it with my teeth.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" she moans, likely in response to another orgasm quickly building even though this one has barely ended.

I slide a finger deep inside of her, immediately finding her g spot as she grabs my head and holds me tight against her sex. I love feeling her hands my hair when I'm pleasuring her; I love that she tries to take control by holding my head in place. There are times when I wouldn't let her do this, but right now I'm being very lenient considering everything she has been through today.

"Oh God! Christian!" she screams as I insert a second finger.

"Come baby!" I nip her clit again, this time a little harder than before.

"CHRISTIAN!" she screams as she comes around me once again.

I quickly slip out of my underwear, never breaking contact with her sex. Ana's eyes are closed; her head is back against the couch as the pleasure takes over her body. She is so beautiful when she comes, it's one of the rare occasions that she loses herself and forgets everything going on. For a few moments she is not shy about her body, which I really don't understand considering how beautiful she is. There is nothing I would change about her perfect body.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" she screams as I slam into her still throbbing sex without warning.

"You are so wet" I moan, pausing to enjoy the feeling of her walls gripping me tightly.

"Ahhhhhhh" she moans as I start thrusting in and out of her.

I nearly pull all the way out of her before slamming back into her forcefully; she moans in pleasure. I continue this pace for several minutes before I find myself holding my own orgasm back. Her walls continue to grip me and I can tell she is getting close to another orgasm, her body quickly recovering from the last one.

"Christian! Too much…..too sensitive" she moans as I gently rub her clit while rotating my hips as I'm deep inside of her.

"Shhhhh….just enjoy it" I tell her, pulling out before thrusting deep inside of her.

"Christian! It's too much!" she says as I pinch her clit.

"I want to feel you come when I'm inside of you" I say, moving in and out of her, staying deep inside of her.

"Noooooooooooo….It's too much. I can't Christian" she cries.

"Yes you can baby" I say slamming into her.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh" She moans, closing her eyes.

"Look at me….I want your eyes on me when you come" I tell her.

Her eyes immediately snap open and I can see the desperation in her eyes; she is clearly trying to hold back her orgasm. I increase the pace knowing that she is not going to be able to withhold the orgasm much longer; by the sounds of her moans and her heavy breathing I know I'm right. Her walls are gripping me tight, threatening to milk my own orgasm but I refuse to give into it until she comes around my dick. I need to feel her come when I'm inside of her tonight; there's something about that moment that solidifies our connection.

"Come baby!" I instruct.

"No…..I can't….please Christian" she begs. "Please…no more."

"Let me feel you come when I'm deep inside of you baby" I say. "I love how you feel when you grab me tightly with your sex, when you start throbbing when I'm deep inside of you."

"CHRISTIAN!" She screams and finally finds her release which triggers my own.

Her walls continue to clench around me, milking every drop of come out of me as I remain deep inside of her. I pull her onto my lap, bringing us both of the floor holding her close to me as we both come down from our orgasms. Her sex continues to spasm around my now softening dick which is buried deep inside of her.

"Are you okay?" I ask.

"That was very intense….I didn't think my body could handle another…" she giggles, clearly not feeling comfortable talking about it.

"Your body was so responsive tonight…." I tell her. "You felt amazing and tasted just as good too."

"Christian" she moans.

"Let's go to bed, it's been a very long day" I say, gently lifting her off of me. We wash up in the bathroom before heading to my bedroom where our naked bodies lay intertwined. I love that we sleep naked every night; I love having access to her beautiful body whenever I want and feeling her body against mine. When I told her I wanted her to stay with me until Hyde was caught never did I think we would end up where we are today. It's going to be a big adjustment when she returns to her apartment; I can't expect her to continue staying here now that Hyde and Elizabeth have been caught. There is no longer a threat and she did just purchase a new apartment. I'm comforted knowing that she is only one floor below me so I could easily see her whenever I wanted. Maybe we can come up with a schedule of days we are going to spend together; even if we do though, it won't compare to sleeping in the same bed every night.


	20. Chapter 20

_Author's Note: A little more drama before the trip to Taiwan._

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James_.

**Chpt. 20 APOV: **

I wake the next morning wrapped in Christian's arms, his body pressed tightly against mine. My mind immediately returns to what happened yesterday; I don't know that I will ever be able to go into SIP without thinking of Hyde and seeing his body lying on my office floor. I'll never forget watching Sawyer fall, hitting his head on my desk and lying unconscious on the floor. I've never felt so helpless in my entire life; I never want to feel that way again.

"Morning baby" Christian says pulling me close to him.

"Morning" I reply.

"Are you okay?" Christian must immediately sense something is wrong.

"I don't know how I'm going to go back to SIP after everything that happened yesterday" I say quietly.

"Oh baby" Christian turns me over so we are face to face.

"How am I not going to walk into my office every day and not see Hyde lying on the floor or Sawyer getting shot?" I ask.

"Why don't you work at GEH for a while? The office you were using last week is still set up for you" he suggests.

"For how long though? I can't just run SIP from GEH…I have to actually be on site some days. Seattle E books doesn't have any space, they are practically outgrowing the space they are in right now" I point out.

"I have a couple empty floors at GEH, why don't you move SIP there" he suggests.

"What? No…" I look at him like he is crazy.

"Why not? You need office space, I have two or three floors that aren't being used" He asks.

"But what happens if things don't work out between us? Then you could kick me out of your building at any time and my company would be homeless" I question.

"Don't work out? Wait…are you thinking of leaving me? Are you not happy?" Christian looks at him full of worry.

"Oh baby, that's not what I'm saying at all" I assure him. "I just don't want to assume; I'm worried about what will happen to SIP if…."

"First, I don't even what you thinking about things not working between us. If you don't like something I'm doing or if you need more from me, just tell me. I will do anything not to lose you, anything. Second, I will have my real estate department send you an iron clad lease for the office space. It can be for as long as you want but it will assure you that I cannot just kick you out of GEH…" he interrupts.

"I'll think about it" I agree.

I'm still nervous about the arrangement but I know I won't be able to return to SIP, at least not anytime soon. I'm afraid that running the office from a distant will result in me missing important things and feeling out of touch with the staff. As I pull myself from my thoughts, I look at Christian and see he is lost in his thoughts as well. I can tell what is going through his head; he is worried because I said that I was concerned about renting the space from him in case things don't work out between us. He assumed I was saying I wanted to leave him, but the reality is we don't have a permanent relationship right now and we haven't been together very long. I can see the wheels turning in Christian's head and I know I need to pull him from this or he is going to continue to dwell on it all day.

"Christian?" I reach between us, grasping his soft erection.

"What?" he says, barely looking at me.

"Come take a shower with me?" I ask.

"No" he answers, pulling away from me and getting out of bed.

He throws on a pair of pajama pants, not bothering to put underwear on and storms out of the room. I'm shocked at what just happened; I'm left feeling completely confused and rejected. I take a long hot shower, trying to process everything that just happened on top of everything that happened yesterday. I get that Christian is upset, but he wouldn't listen to me when I tried to tell him I wasn't thinking about leaving him. I quickly get dressed and go in search of Christian; the apartment is eerily silent when I walk downstairs. I don't see Christian anywhere; I check his office, the kitchen, the great room and any other room I can think of but don't find him. I even look in the playroom, not that I expected to find him there, but I checked anyway. I realize he probably left the apartment; feeling defeated I find my purse and head to my apartment. It's been almost two months since the night Hyde destroyed my apartment and I haven't been back since. Walking into my apartment you can't even tell anything ever happened; every piece of furniture has been replaced, the walls are freshly painted, the apartment even smells new.

The apartment feels so empty and lonely which it never felt like before. I decide to go out shopping rather than sitting in an empty apartment. I don't know if we are still going to Taiwan tomorrow, but I want to pick out some new items in case we do. Even if we don't go, I suppose I can always where them in the playroom or something. I just know I can't sit here, thinking about what Christian is doing right now or what he is thinking. I find myself getting angry that he assumed I was thinking about leaving him, but I suppose I can understand why he thought that. But, I'm even more angry that he just left the apartment without telling me. There was no note, no text, nothing from him telling me he was leaving.

I spend the next several hours shopping at several high end lingerie stores; obviously they don't stock BDSM attire in the store but they have carry very provocative clothing which can easily work for a scene. I load several bags into my trunk before treating myself to a late lunch. I check my phone while I'm waiting for lunch to be served, but there is nothing from Christian. I sigh in disappointment and can't help but wonder where he is right now. I push my food around my plate, no longer hungry and eventually pay for a meal I barely ate.

_Christian, I'm sorry. Can we talk? –A_

I finally get enough courage to send him a text but I still don't get a response. On my way I'm stop by a liquor store and by several bottles of wine; I have no idea what alcohol is in my apartment but right now I feel like drinking. Arriving back at Escala, I pull into my assigned parking spot momentarily glancing at Christian's parking spots which are all full. I'm angry knowing that he is upstairs and not responding to my texts, not calling me or not even caring that I'm not in the apartment.

"Hi Kate" I say as she picks up her phone.

"Ana! How are you? I haven't heard from you in ages" she answers quickly.

"That's why I was calling" I pause. "Do you want to go out tonight?"

"Really? Of course!" Kate exclaims happily.

"I don't know anywhere around here" I say.

"Oh, how about Mile High Club? It's only been open for about a year now and is supposed to be pretty hot" Kate says.

"Sure, text me the address and I will meet you there" I reply.

"See you around 9?" she asks.

"Sounds good" I end the call.

I pour a large glass of wine before going into my room and finding something to wear. Right now, I just want to go out and forget about Christian; it's been hours and I haven't heard from him. I don't understand why he hasn't answered my text or at least called to see where I am. I quickly finish my glass of wine and pour another before taking a long bath, trying to relax before I go out dancing tonight with Kate. I really don't enjoy going to clubs, but I don't want to spend the night alone here dwelling on everything that happened. I decide to wear a navy blue, form fitting short dress with black heels to go out tonight in. A little before ten I arrive downstairs where the doorman calls me a cab; I don't want to drive since I plan on drinking tonight and since I've already had two large glasses of wine.

"Kate!" I yell as soon as she steps out of a cab.

"Ana!" she hugs me.

"Hi Ana" Elliot says pulling me for a hug.

"Elliot, how are you?" I ask, trying not to show the disappointment that he is here.

"I'm good pretty lady, how are you?" he asks.

"I'm okay" I lie.

"I was surprised you didn't join Christian for lunch today at my parents" Elliot says as we sit down and order our drinks.

"Oh yeah…I had a few errands to run" I make up an excuse. "Now, who wants to dance?"

Kate and I head out to the dance floor leaving Elliot alone at the table. The music takes over my body and I lose myself dancing, trying to forget everything that happened over the last few days. The hours fly by and before I know it the alcohol hits me hard. I tell Kate I need to sit down, she accompanies me back to our table where I put my head down in the middle of the table.

"Little lady you okay?" Elliot laughs.

"No…" I moan.

"Let's get you some water" Kate laughs leaving the table.

"Where's Christian tonight?" Elliot asks.

"Who the fuck knows" I answer angrily.

"I see" he mumbles.

"I think I need some fresh air" I stand up from the table.

"Why don't you wait, I'll come with you. Just let me tell Kate-" he says.

"No, it's fine. I'll be right back" I head to the front door.

Stepping outside the cool air hits me like a ton of bricks and suddenly everything outside is spinning. I sit down on the edge of a brick wall that surrounds the flower bed, bending my legs to the side desperately trying not to show all the cars passing by my underwear. I take a few deep breaths, trying to get the cool air to help me sober up but I don't find it to be working as I had hoped.

"Hello gorgeous" a deep voice says above me.

"Hi" I look up seeing a tall, somewhat good looking man standing above me.

"You look like you could use a hand" he says putting his hand out.

I take his hand and stand up, which immediately causes everything to start spinning again. UGH, I should have stayed sitting down. I immediately regret moving; my head had just stopped spinning when this guy approached me. I should have stayed where I was. I sway on my feet as I try to convince the world to stop spinning.

"Would you like to go inside and get something to drink?" he asks.

"No, I'm fine out here" I answer.

"How about I take you some place more comfortable so you can lie down?" he asks.

"Ummmm….no that's okay" I say, glancing around there are only a few people outside the club at this hour. I wish I had let Elliot come outside with me; this guy is seriously giving me the creeps.

"Come on baby" he pulls my hand towards the side walk.

"I believe the lady said no" Another voice says firmly; a voice I quickly recognize as Christian.

"I don't believe this is any of your business" the guy still holding my hand says.

"It is my fucking business seeing as you have your hands on my girlfriend!" Christian glares at the man.

"Well if she is your girlfriend what is she doing out here drunk, about to pass out? If she were mine, I wouldn't let her out of my sight" The man says, holding my hand tighter.

Suddenly the world starts spinning rapidly and before I know what's happening I lean over and throw up the little I ate today.

"UGH…nevermind you can have her" the man quickly jumps back as puke lands all of his shoes.

The sudden movement throws of my balance even more which has me throwing up again. I feel Christian's arm around my waist guiding me over to the flower bed where I was just sitting. I continue throwing up everything I drank today as Christian holds my hair out of my face. I really don't want him near me right now; I'm still pissed at him but I would rather him be here than the strange guy who wouldn't let go of my hand.

"Come on, let's get you home" Christian says calmly.

"I don't want to go anywhere with you" I stand up slowly.

"Would you rather stay out here for some guy to take you around the corner and rape you?" Christian says angrily.

"Why would you even care?" I yell. "Just put me in a cab, I'll be fine."

"No! What happens if you pass out in the cab? Too many things can happen, let me take you home" he says.

"Fine…whatever. I'm not going to your place; if you're taking me anywhere it's to my home" I say firmly.

"If that's what you want" Christian agrees reluctantly.

"I need to get my purse inside" I say pulling away from him and walking back into the club.

Christian follows me as I go to the table and grab my purse and finish my glass of wine; trying to get rid of the taste of throw up still in my mouth. I feel Christian's eyes on me as I finish my drink, but I don't care what he is thinking – he left me. Elliot and Kate are dancing again; I need to at least let her know I'm leaving so she doesn't worry.

"Let's go" Christian says.

"I need to tell Kate I'm leaving" I walk onto the dance floor, Christian trailing behind me.

Christian's hands go to my hips, his body is close to mine as we make our way through the crowd on the dance floor. Of course Elliot and Kate are on the other side of the dance floor; it takes Christian and I several minutes to finally reach them. I tell her I'm leaving and that Christian is driving me home; she smiles and continues grinding herself against Elliot. Elliot promises to get her home safely seeing as she is as drunk as I was not long ago. Before we leave, Christian guides me to the bar and orders me a bottle of water. He insists I drink at least half of it before we leave; I reluctantly agree though the water does help the feeling of dehydration I have had since I came back inside. The entire time Christian's arm never leaves my back, I don't know if it's because he wants to touch me or if it's because he wants everyone there to know they can't touch me. I make no effort to touch him in return but allow him to guide me back outside.

"My car is just around the corner" he says as we step outside into the cool air again.

I don't reply but allow him to guide me through the crowd outside to the now familiar black SUV. He helps me into the passenger seat before getting into the driver's seat. I lean against the door and slowly watch the buildings pass us by as we drive back to Escala. Neither of us say a word the entire trip, I don't think we know what to say. Seeing Christian again has the anger I felt earlier returning; I can't believe he left the penthouse without saying a word to me or even acknowledging me! A few moments later we arrive at Escala and I get out of the car quickly not giving him the opportunity to help me out. He follows me into the elevator where I punch in the code to my floor; again the ride is silent and Christian makes no attempt to touch me. Clearly his arm around me at the club was to show everyone that I was with him rather than him wanting to touch me which is a depressing realization.

"I'm home now; you can go to your place" I say as we get off the elevator.

"Ana, please….can we talk?" he asks.

"It's late, I just want to go to sleep" I answer, not wanting to hear his excuses right now.

"Ana…." He says sadly.

"We can talk in the morning" I sigh.

"I don't want to leave you" he replies.

"You had no problem leaving me this morning" I fire back.

"You're right….Please Ana…let me explain" he begs.

"Not tonight. You can sleep in the guest room here if you don't want to go upstairs, we can talk when we wake up in the morning" I reluctantly say seeing that he isn't dropping the issue.

"Okay" he sighs.

I show Christian the guest room which is on the other side of the apartment from my bedroom and see that he has everything he needs before heading to my own bedroom. I throw on a tank top and crawl into bed, quickly falling asleep forgetting that Christian is down the hall from me. Sleep quickly finds me as the exhaustion from the last several days plus the alcohol hits me. I wake up a few hours later to use the bathroom and take a few Advil incase I end up with a hangover in the morning. I hear a loud scream just as I crawl back into bed and I immediately run out to the main area of the apartment expecting to find someone but the area is dark and quiet. I hear another scream coming from the guest room and cautiously open the door afraid that someone has broken in and is attacking Christian. I sigh in relief when I open the door and see that no one is there, I check the bathroom attached to the guest room which is also empty.

"NOOOOOOOOOO! STOP!" Christian screams thrashing around in bed.

"MOMMY! HELP ME! MAKE HIM STOP!" He screams.

My heart immediately breaks; his voice is that of a child begging for help. I try calling out to him but I get no response. No matter how mad I am at him I can't let him stay in this nightmare much longer, I need to find a way to pull him from it. I place my hands on his shoulders while calling his name, but still nothing.

"STOP IT! OUCH! HOT! IT HURTS MOMMY" He cries out.

His eyes are pinched shut as the tears run down his cheeks while his arms try to push something or someone away from his chest. I gently climb into bed with him, moving next to him trying not to startle him. I maneuver myself so I'm lying right next to him, our bodies are touching as he continues to thrash about in the bed. I wrap my leg around his waist, anchoring him to me as I place my chest against his. This is a risky move since he is already trying to keep someone or something from his chest but I have found the only way to help him when he is like this is to be as close to him as possible. I pull his head into my neck and gently rock us back and forth as he finally stops thrashing around. His heart is racing but I can feel his body slowly start to relax. His arms wrap around me, holding me tight against him.

"I'm sorry I woke you" he whispers against my neck.

"It's okay, I was up anyway" I say.

"Thank you" he says.

I don't say anything but rub small circles on his back as he places small light kisses on my neck. Several minutes pass by and his breathing is now returned to normal, his body is not nearly as tense as it was when he first woke up.

"You don't have to stay" he whispers but pulls me closer to him.

"Shhhhhhhhh" I say.

I know I should go back to my room but lying here in Christian's arms just feels so right. Seeing and hearing him in a nightmare like the one he just had breaks my heart. Tonight I was clear on the other side of the apartment instead of in bed with him; I can't help but feel guilty knowing that if I were in bed with him the nightmare likely wouldn't have lasted as long as it did. I wonder if his nightmares are always this bad; how long do they last if I'm not there? It makes me realize how much Christian and I still don't know about each other despite living together for the last couple of months. I realize Christian is sound asleep in my arms and I decide to try to get some sleep knowing that we have a lot to talk about tomorrow.

"Morning" Christian says as I begin to wake up.

"Good Morning" I greet him.

"Thank you for staying with me last night" Christian whispers.

"It's okay" I say.

"We should talk" Christian says quietly.

"I know" I sigh.

"I'm sorry I left yesterday" he says.

"Why did you leave?" I ask.

"I….SHIT….this is harder than I thought" I feel him tense against me.

"You can tell me" I prompt.

"When you said what if things don't work out….I….I was afraid you were saying you don't see things lasting between us. I thought it was your way of telling me that you were leaving me" he sighs.

"Christian" I pause. "I love you. I am not planning on going anywhere, I'm not leaving you."

"But…." He says.

"I was being realistic" I interrupt. "We haven't been together that long, we are still getting to know each other. What if one day you realize that I'm not enough for you? What if you realize you want someone who is a better sub? Or that you don't have time for a relationship with everything else going on in your life? If SIP were at GEH, you would be reminded of me every time you saw me…"

"Why wouldn't you be enough for me?" he asks surprised.

"Christian" I sigh, needing to voice my fears. "I know I'm not the perfect sub; I'm not the silent type who just takes what you dish out in the playroom. I'm sure when you decided to become involved in BDSM you pictured a perfect sub who did whatever you said. I'm sure you didn't expect to develop a full relationship with a sub, to have them living with you and sharing your work space."

"Ana…baby…." He pulls away so he can look me in the eyes as mine fill with tears. "Where is this coming from?"

"It's the reality Christian" I take a deep breath. "I'm afraid one day you are going to wake up and realize that you want that perfect sub that you had in mind when you found BDSM."

"You're right, I did want that perfect sub that was described in everything I read on BDSM" Christian admits and my heart sinks. "But then I found you. From the moment I first laid eyes on you, I knew you were what I needed. I will never want you to be just a sub; I could never see you like that. You were everything I needed that I didn't know I needed."

"But you left yesterday morning…" I whisper, too touched by his words to find my voice.

"I was afraid Ana" He admits. "I thought you were leaving me, I couldn't bear to see you knowing that you were leaving. Knowing that you were thinking that we weren't going to last; that you didn't see a future with me. I can't imagine my life without you and the thought of you leaving petrified me. I've never told anyone outside of my family that I loved them…"

"I haven't said those words to anyone either Christian" I pull him close to me. "I'm not planning on things not working out between us. I was just worried about SIP and renting space from you incase a year or two from now you decide I'm not what you need."

"You will always be what I need. Even in the throes of a nightmare you are the only thing that can pull me from them. I will always need you" he kisses me gently on the lips.

"Can I ask you about them?" I say a few moments later.

"Sure" he takes a deep breath.

"You said I'm the only one that can pull you from your nightmares" I begin. "What happened before me when you had a nightmare?"

"They would last forever" he whispers. "Taylor once told me that he can hear my screams downstairs and that they have lasted for more than hour on many occasions. He once tried to wake me; that ended with him having a black eye because I punched him. Ever since then he doesn't interfere as long as I'm in my room. Eventually when I would wake I would spend hours playing the piano trying to calm down; I never would go back to sleep because I learned very quickly that if I did the nightmares would return. I got used to functioning on very little sleep; often just a matter of a couple of hours."

"How often did you have them?" I ask.

"Four to five times a week typically, sometimes more" he admits quietly.

That shocks me; I've sleep with him on numerous occasions when he didn't have nightmares. Over the last couple of months of living with him I've been witness to several nightmares but they didn't occur anywhere near that often. They've never lasted nearly as long as Christian describes and typically he seems to fall asleep with me afterwards.

"Christian…I had no idea" I sigh.

"Just please don't leave me Ana" he whispers. "I'll do anything, but I can't lose you."

"I'm not going anywhere Christian, I love you" I assure him.

"I love you, my life has changed so much since the day I met you" he kisses me passionately. "I was so pissed that I even had to go to Taiwan on that trip; it was supposed to be Ros going but they wouldn't deal with her because she is a woman. I never would have met you if I hadn't gone on that trip."

"If you ever want more from me, if I'm not doing enough…" I begin.

"Shhhhh….baby you're perfect the way you are. Don't change anything" he interrupts.

"I love you Christian" I kiss him deeply. "So much."

Our kiss is more passionate than ever, both of us clearly overwhelmed with emotions. I think we both overreacted yesterday, but I need to remember Christian has a difficult time believing that I won't leave him. I'm not a psychiatrist, but I'd bet my entire bank account on the reason for this is because his mother abandoned him and failed to protect him when he was being abused. He hasn't told me much about it, but I can tell a lot from the nightmares I have seen. I'm glad I shared my fears that he will one day want a better sub; I know I'm not a perfect sub. When I was observing scenes before Christian and I found each other again, I saw so many subs not making a sound when they were in the playroom unless the dominant told them to. I've never been able to do that; I'm too vocal I guess. Deep down I've always worried that Christian will want a sub like one that I saw in the clubs. Or that he will decide he doesn't want the stress of a full relationship but only wants a sub. I don't think I could ever be just a sub with him; I could never be satisfied just having him in the playroom. Our time outside the playroom is so intense, so full of emotion that I know I would instantly miss it.

"Christian…I need you" I moan feeling his erection against my sex.

"I got you, I'll take care of you" he whispers, nipping my ear.

He rolls me on top of him, quickly pulling my shirt off and taking my nipple in his mouth. I moan as he alternates between sucking on one nipple while pinching the other. I feel his erection against my underwear clad sex and shameless grind myself against him causing him to moan.

"I want you" he moans thrusting his hips up.

"I'm yours…take me" I kiss him deeply, my tongue following the outline of his lips.

I slide down his body pulling his underwear off as I move down. As I toss them onto the floor, I take my own off and climb back on top of him before taking his erection deep in my throat. He gasps loudly in surprise and gently places his hand on my head. He lets me set the pace as he lays on the bed enjoying the pleasure. I find myself getting wetter with every moan, knowing that I am bringing him so much pleasure turns me on even more.

"I need you" he moans pulling me back to his lips.

His lips immediately find mine; he kisses me deeply, his tongue exploring my lip as he nips on them. His hands are grasping my ass, pushing me against him. I lift myself slightly which positions him at my opening and he groans as he slowly pulls me down to him.

"Ahhhhhhh" I moan as he thrusts himself deeper inside of me.

His hands gently move me against him, moving me up and down against his hard erection. I run my fingers through his hair, pulling his mouth to mine as I thrust my tongue inside of him. The pace is slow and almost torturous as the orgasm builds but remains just out of reach.

"Baby…" I beg.

"Hmmm?" He moans, as he continues to move me against him.

"I'm so close….harder, faster please" I beg.

"No, baby….I need this slow" He says.

Moaning in disappointment, I try to move myself against him harder or deeper desperately needing to find a release. He must sense what I'm trying to do because he surprises me by rolling us over so he is now on top of me. He holds my hands in his, leaning down and kissing me passionately as he continues to move in and out of me slowly. He pulls nearly all the way out before slowly pushing himself into me. I'm on the edge, my body is on fire with desire as I desperately need to find a release. He continues his slow thrusts in and out of me, keeping me on the edge longer. His breathing increases as he swells inside of me; I know he is getting close to his own release. He doesn't increase the pace, but starts thrusting in me deeper so he applies just enough pressure to my clit every time he enters me.

"Oh God!" I cry out as the orgasm finally hits.

"ANA!" Christian screams as he finds his release deep inside of me.

He continues to thrust slowly in and out of me, prolonging my orgasm as he kisses me deeply. Christian gently moves so we are both lying on our sides, never breaking our connection. I run my hands up and down his back, enjoying the fact that I can touch him without worrying that I am bringing him pain. Ever since he told me that it doesn't bother him when I touch his back and his chest I can't seem to get enough of touching him. There is something about knowing that I'm the only one who can do this that makes me feel so much closer to him.

"Ana?" Christian pulls me from my thoughts a few moments later.

"Hmmmm?" I ask.

"Are you still coming to Taiwan with me?" Christian's voice is cautious as he asks.

"Yes" I say without hesitation.

"Are you sure?" he clarifies.

"Yes Christian" I kiss him. "I'm looking forward to some time away from everything here."

"I have some paperwork that you need to sign upstairs that I need to fax over before we leave" he explains.

"Paperwork?" I ask confused.

"For the club, we need to purchase memberships" he says. "I have all the paperwork completed but you need to sign saying that you reviewed the rules and understand them."

"Oh, sure" I smile thinking of returning to the place we first met. "How much do I owe you for my membership?"

"Nothing" he says firmly.

"Christian, you already paid for the flight and hotel, I can't let you pay for the membership as well" I point out.

"They offer a couple membership for established dom/subs but it has to be purchased as a package so it's all taken care of" he says.

"You're frustrating" I sigh.

"I know" he laughs.

"I need to pack a few things, then I can meet you upstairs?" I suggest.

"I have two outfits packed for you to wear to the club, so just pack what you need while we're in the hotel" he replies.

"You have outfits packed for me?" I ask surprised.

"Yes," he says. "Now go back your clothes and meet me upstairs."

"Ow!" he playfully smacks my ass before getting dressed. "Yes sir."

"We need to leave for the airport in two hours" he says leaving my room.

"SHIT" I exclaim rushing to get out of bed.

I quickly run back to my bedroom and take a fast shower before throwing on a comfortable pair of jeans and a shirt. It's going to be a very long flight so I want to be sure to be comfortable. I throw a couple changes of clothes into a small suitcase, packing both casual and dressy clothes not knowing if Christian is going to want to go out while we're in Taiwan. I find myself wondering about the outfits he packed for me for the club; the thought that he picked out something specifically for this occasion is oddly arousing to me.

"Christian?" I call as I enter his penthouse a few moments later.

"In my office" he calls.

I walk into his office, leaving my bag in the foyer, where Christian hands me the paperwork I need to review and sign. He has completed all the necessary information so as he said all I needed to do was sign. I read through the rules which are pretty much exactly how I remember them from the last time I was there; though I find myself understanding a great deal more than I did then. There is an entire separate list of rules specifically for submissive which is quite extensive.

"This is some list of rules" I say surprised.

"I thought the same thing" he agrees. "Madame Serene explained that when we were there it was an introductory special for new members therefore they didn't uphold all the typical rules. Since this weekend isn't an introductory weekend it is expected that only members will be in attendance. Their regular members require all doms and subs to act according to these rules. I have my own list of rules to follow as well. If you don't like this, we don't have to go-"

"No, it's fine. I'm just glad this is not what you want from me full time" I interrupt.

I read through the rules for the evening as Christian also provides me a copy of the doms rules which are much shorter than the subs:

_Submissive Rules:  
1. Submissive will not speak until directed by her dominant (if she is currently involved) or another dominant.  
2. Submissive shall not consume any food or beverage that is not provided by a dominant.  
3. Submissive's eyes shall remain downcast at all times unless directed by a dominant.  
4. Submissive shall have established safe words prior to entering the club.  
5. Submissive shall not appear drunk at any time.  
6. Submissive shall not approach any dominant unless directed by a dominant.  
7. If involved with a dominant, submissive shall remain at his side at all times unless he directs otherwise.  
8. Submissive shall abide by all rules established by a dominant unless they breach her soft or hard limits at which time she is expected to bring this to the dominant's attention.  
9. Submissive shall not try to top from the bottom or punishment will immediately be delivered._

Dominant Rules:  
1. Dominant shall remain with chosen submissive at all times.  
2. Dominant assumes all responsibility for chosen submissive.  
3. Dominant shall insure that all submissive's needs are met including those for food, water and toileting.  
4. Dominant shall cover all costs associated with chosen submissive at the club including but not limited to food, beverages, toys, clothing and accessories.  
5. Dominant shall not engage in a scene if intoxicated.  
6. Dominant must adhere to any safeword given by a submissive.  
7. Dominant shall review and agree to soft/hard limits before beginning a scene.

"Ana?" Christian asks after some time.

"Here" I sign my name and return the paperwork to Christian.

"We don't have to go" he repeats.

"No, it's okay" I sigh. "Most of the rules are those that I read online that are typically in place for dom/sub arrangements so it's nothing new."

Christian faxes over the paperwork before we head to the garage to his SUV where he loads are bags. The trip to the airport takes longer than expected as we hit some traffic but we arrive in plenty of time to check in. I don't know why I'm surprised but in true Christian fashion, he has booked up in first class so we are ushered through the security check in and into a reserved waiting area before we board the plane.


	21. Chapter 21

_Author's note: I had a few comments asking why they didn't take Christian's plane. My thinking was that a private plane would not have the fuel capacity to make such a long trip therefore they needed to take a commercial flight. There are nonstop commercial flights available from Seattle directly to Taiwan, which I believe would be the preferred method of travel for Christian._

_Also, we're in Taiwan now so the next few chapters are going to be full of lemons!_

_All characters belong to E.L. James_.

**Chpt. 21 APOV:**

The flight to Taiwan is long but uneventful; sitting in first class definitely makes the trip much more comfortable. When I flew here before I had to fly coach because the price of a first class ticket was too expensive. Money was tight as we were just starting to look into purchasing SIP and needed to save every penny where possible. I fall sleep against Christian early into the flight having not slept very well the night before. I can't believe how much I drank last night and that I threw up outside the club. Although I was pissed at Christian at the time, I'm glad Elliot called him and told him that I was out. If Elliot hadn't called him I don't know that we would be on our way to Taiwan right now. Our flight lands in Taiwan as scheduled, where we retrieve our luggage and hail a cab to the hotel that Christian has reservations at. Of course Christian reserves the largest suit the hotel has, it has two bedrooms, a full kitchen, a dining room, two bathrooms, a patio and a large living room.

"Christian, this room is huge" I say in awe looking around.

"I enjoyed it the last time I was here" he sighs.

"You had this room for one person?" I ask.

"Yes" he answers simply. "Come let's get unpacked, I'm going to order room service for dinner."

We unpack our clothes and personal items that we brought for the trip. Christian is careful to leave a smaller bag tucked inside his suitcase in the closet which I can only assume is for our time at the club tomorrow night. I find myself wishing we were going to the club tonight, despite all the rules that I am expected to abide by. I don't know what Christian is going to have planned or what type of outfit he has picked out for me to wear but I'm very curious.

"So I was thinking about what you said yesterday" Christian says as we eat dinner.

"What did I say?" I ask confused.

"That we didn't really know a lot about each other" he answers.

"Well…I mean we do…" I stutter.

"No you're right, we don't. I thought we could play a kind of twenty questions game and get to know each other more" he suggests.

"Okay" I laugh, enjoying this side of playful Christian.

"I'll start…tell me about your parents" He says.

"Well, you know my mother passed away. My dad and I are pretty close, but of course we don't see each other nearly as much as I would like. He lives in Portland which isn't very far but he often travels for work and with my own work schedule I don't get to see him very often" I explain.

"Your turn" he pours us each a glass of wine.

"What was it like for you growing up?" I take a sip of the sweet wine he poured.

"Rough" he sighs. "I couldn't stand for people to touch me, which resulted in me getting into a lot of fights in school. I was expelled from three different schools for fighting; it probably would have been more had my parents not made large donations to the private school I graduated from."

"Did you have any girlfriends in high school?" I ask.

"A couple…but they all ended very quickly. No one could understand why they couldn't touch my chest or my back…which meant they couldn't hug me and I couldn't hug them" he pauses. "And that was two questions."

"So it was" I laugh.

"Tell me about your time in high school…did you have many boyfriends?" he asks.

"No" I sigh. "I was a book worm; your typical nerd. I spent most of the time in library reading books or completing extra credit assignments with my teachers. I didn't have my first boyfriend until college."

"Your turn" he smiles.

"What were you doing when you left the penthouse the other day?" I ask.

"I had lunch with my parents, then had a session with Dr. Flynn, my shrink and then a long jog before Elliot called" Christian admits quietly.

"Oh…you were gone a long time" I observe.

"Your turn" he says a few moments later.

"How many sexual partners have had?" I ask bravely, taking another sip of wine.

"Including you, four" he answers.

"Hmmmmm" I'm surprised.

"You expected the number to be higher?" he asks.

"Well…yes" I smile.

"I've been on more dates than I can count, but they never worked out for one reason or another. Sometimes it was my work schedule, the long hours or having to cancel dates at the last minute that bothered them. Other times it was because they didn't understand why I wouldn't let them touch me; they would always think it was about them. It was difficult being intimate with them, because I couldn't tie them to the bed…so instead I had to resort to always holding their hands" he explains.

"Makes sense…" I say.

"Tell me about your sexual partners" he asks.

"Well, you already know that I've only had one partner before you" I answer. "He was a guy I met in college, we dated for six months before we finally had sex. The sex was, now I realize, boring and unfulfilling. I had to fake orgasms with him because I would rarely achieve one with him. Eventually it ended when I walked in on him fucking my roommate in my bed."

"Ouch" Christian says.

"Yeah…he said it was because I was a lousy lay" I laugh.

"Oh baby, that couldn't be further from the truth" Christian leads me over to the couch.

"My turn" I smile. "Tell me about your sexual experiences."

"Hmmmm" he sighs. "Well, you already know that none were in the lifestyle so it was plain vanilla sex. Let's just say I wasn't as responsive as I am with you….with them having an orgasm once was enough. With you, it's like I can't get enough of you. Even after I come I can't wait to get inside you again; I'm often ready to go minutes later. It was never like that with them."

"And at the clubs?" I ask the wine clearly giving me courage.

"I was involved in scenes with two subs, three scenes total before I realized it wasn't working. I couldn't perform with either sub, no matter how long we were in a scene or how hard they tried I just couldn't…After it happened with the second sub I realized it just wasn't going to happen and I stopped going to the club" he explains.

"Oh" I frown.

"What about your time at the club?" he asks, drinking his wine.

"I went several times in New York just to watch, several times a dom would approach me but I wouldn't get involved. I observed several scenes, or would just watch how a dom and sub would interact. I was more interested in learning about the lifestyle. Right before I moved back to Seattle though I felt I was losing control and desperately needed a scene. I went to the club and agreed to a scene with a dom who I had seen around the club several times. I left feeling used that night" I say sadly.

"Used? Did he hurt you?" Christian eyes are full of concern.

"No, nothing like that" Christian sighs in relief. "You know we didn't have sex, he brought me to an orgasm using the cat tails and a vibrating egg that he had inserted inside of me. After my orgasm, he ordered me to my knees where I…well you know…and afterwards he stood me, gave me a bottle of water as he got dressed and left."

"That bastard" he says.

"I think having been involved with you; I expected more from a dom. I didn't expect to feel so used right afterwards" I admit.

"I think we need more wine…" Christian refills both of our glasses.

"How intimate were you in the scenes at the club?" I ask blushing.

"I brought them to an orgasm using toys, never my mouth or hand" he says. "I had one suck me but I couldn't…" he blushes now.

"Oh…." I realize what he is trying to say.

"Did you ever engage in anal play before me?" Christian asks bluntly.

"No" my face a deep red. "Did you…with other women?"

"No" he admits. "Do you like it?"

"Yes" I admit quietly, clearly the alcohol is making me feel less embarrassed. "Do you?"

"Knowing that I'm the only one who has ever touched you like that? It's turning me on more than you would know right now" he smiles. "But even before tonight, yes I do."

"Did you ever use toys with the women you had sex with?" I ask.

"No" he admits. "Did you?"

"No" I say.

"Are you happy with the balance we have between dom/sub and our relationship?" he asks.

"Yes, very much so" I smile.

"Are you getting turned on by this discussion?" he asks.

"Yes" I admit. "Are you?"

He answers that question by putting my hand against his erection so I can feel how hard he is. He pulls me onto his lap, grinding me against his erection. He quickly unbuttons my top and removes my bra, his lips never leaving mine. I pull his shirt off of him before running my hands down his chest, once again enjoying that I can now freely do this. It was so difficult in the past to not touch his chest or his back especially when we were intimate.

"I love you" I whisper as I nip his ear, my breasts lay against his chest.

"God, I love you baby" he pulls me tighter against him, hugging me closely.

Christian suddenly stands me but holds me close to the couch as he unbuttons my pants, sliding them and my panties down my legs and tossing them to the side. I copy his actions, pulling him up from the couch and removing his underwear and pants before he pulls me back down on the couch. Once again I am straddling him, as his mouth crushes against mine hard. He pulls my hips down as he gently slides into my drenched sex. I moan taking him all in, feeling him deep inside of me. I never get tired of feeling him stretch me, of the full feeling I get whenever he is inside of me.

"Ride me baby" he begs, his voice sounds as if he is trying to maintain control.

With my hands on his shoulders I ride him, starting off slow but quickly increasing the pace and the intensity of my thrusts. We are both moaning loudly as I continue to slam myself into him, taking him in deep so he hits that magical spot that only he can find.

"Oh God!" I scream as the orgasm approaches.

"You feel so good baby, don't stop" he moans.

"CHRISTIAN!" I yell as the orgasm rips through me.

"ANA!" Christian screams, finding his release moments after I find my own.

"Wow" I sigh, resting my head against his shoulder, kissing his neck.

"Yeah" he moans.

"What's your plan for tomorrow?" I ask as we lay in bed together a little while later.

"I have a meeting at eleven which hopefully should be over by two or three. I figure we can have an early dinner before heading to the club then?" he asks.

"Sure…I have a few things with me to keep me busy" I answer.

The next morning we have breakfast delivered to the room before Christian leaves for his meeting. Christian had sent a new member of his team over to my office to retrieve some of my files before we left so I could at least get some work done while Christian was in his meetings. I read through several emails, responding to a few before getting lost in a manuscript that several of our editors are hesitant about. I make several notes in the columns but overall find myself getting lost in it which is always the sign of a good book in the making. Before I realize it the day has flown by and Christian texts me saying he should be back at the hotel within an hour. I place an order for room service and find myself getting nervous as the time to leave for the club gets closer. I'm not sure why I'm nervous, I trust Christian completely to take care of me. I know he won't let another dom get close to me or try to touch me. I think I'm more nervous because I don't know what he has planned for the scene or even for tonight.

"Hi" Christian greets me just as I'm setting dinner on the table.

"Hey you" I kiss him.

"How was your day?" he asks as we sit down to eat dinner.

"It went by faster than I thought" I admit. "I spent the time sorting through emails and reading a manuscript. How was your meeting?"

"Boring and a waste of my time" he sighs. "I don't know why they can't handle things like this over the phone and instead need me to physically explain things to them. It was just like last time, there is almost no point in me being here."

"Well, I don't know about no point…." I smirk.

"Oh that smart mouth of yours is going to get you trouble" he laughs.

"You love my mouth" I smile.

"You have no idea how much" he giggles. "I'm going to lay out your outfit for tonight on the bed and then take a shower. I want you to wear only what I have laid out for you, understood?"

"Yes sir" I say.

"When you hear the shower start you can come in and start getting ready" he heads to the bedroom, shutting the door behind him.

I suddenly feel butterflies in my stomach wondering about what he has planned for tonight. I try to remind myself that as the dom he knows what I need and he is supposed to push my boundaries, my limits to bring me pleasure. The fact that we are in another country, where there is no chance of running into anyone we know just excites me further knowing that he probably has something unique planned. I hear the shower turning on and take a deep breath before going into the bedroom. As he said, there on the bed is the outfit he packed for me. I'm absolutely floored and half tempted to refuse to go tonight but I need to remind myself once again that I am giving him complete control to him tonight therefore I need to do what he says. Laying on the bed is a dress, if one can even call it that is completely see through. It has long sleeves, a deep neckline and looks like it will fall just below my ass. It covers nothing and leaves absolutely nothing to the imagination. I see a lace thong next to the address which is almost see through but should at least cover my sex although it will leave my ass fully exposed. The bra is very similar to the one I wore on our second night in Taiwan, with cut outs for the nipples. Looking at this it's clear that my ass and nipples will be on full display unless he adds something to this outfit. I take a deep breath before putting on the outfit, cringing when I look in the mirror and see my entire body on display.

"Wow" Christian gasps as he opens the bathroom door.

"Do you like it sir?" I ask, slowly turning around so he can take in the entire outfit.

"Like? Fuck I could take you right now and still not feel satisfied" he moans. "You look beautiful."

"It's quite revealing" I admit.

"Yes it is" he agrees. "I have something that will cover your nipples so they won't be as noticeable."

"Oh good" I sigh.

"I have another item for you" he says after he gets dressed.

Christian hands me a medium sized baby blue box, which I quickly open to discover a beautiful necklace. There is a small gold chain that looks like it will rest check below my neck; hanging from it are two diamond encrusted hearts intertwined.

"Christian this is beautiful" I say in awe.

"Do you know what this is?" he attaches the necklace around my neck, the heart falling just to my collar bone.

"Is it meant to symbolize a collar?" I guess.

"Yes, it is a collar" he confirms. "It is meant to let everyone in the lifestyle know that you belong to me."

"It's breathtaking, very sophisticated" I say.

"I looked for a long time for something perfect for you. There were too many that look like someone owns the sub; I wanted something that you could wear at any time in any place something that would remind you of me" he blushes.

"Oh it's perfect Christian" I kiss him deeply, completely surprised by his gift.

"Now, shall we cover up those nipples so everyone can't see them?" he laughs.

"That would probably be a good idea" I giggle.

Christian tugs the neckline of the dress down which is easily done as the dress is made of a very stretchy material. It's tight against all my curves, but stretches so he could pull the entire top down to my waist without ruining the dress. He immediately sucks hard on my nipple through the cutout of my bra and I feel my body quickly responding to him as my nipple hardens in his mouth. I lean my head back, closing my eyes at the pleasure when I suddenly feel a pinch on my nipple. I look down just as Christian begins sucking hard on the other nipple. Affixed to my one nipple is a small purple butterfly attached to a clip; quickly Christian clamps another butterfly on my other nipple. The clips don't hurt, they are a tad uncomfortable but nothing compared to the nipple clamps that he has used in the past. He pulls my dress back up and steps back to admire my breasts.

"Now you look perfect" he smiles. "Does it hurt?"

"No" I blush but am thankful that at least my nipples are now covered even if my ass remains fully exposed.

"I have an overcoat for you to wear until we get to the club" he turns to his closet before producing a black jacket. "Once we arrive at the club this jacket comes off."

"Yes sir" I say nervously.

"Ana, I know you're nervous and probably uncomfortable showing this much of your body off" he pulls me against him, embracing me from behind. "But you are an absolutely stunning, beautiful woman who needs to become more comfortable with her body. You look perfect."

"Thank you sir" I whisper.

"Shall we go?" Christian asks, assisting me with the jacket.

"I'm ready" I take a deep breath.

The cab ride to the club is longer than I expected, but I am thankful for the jacket which covers everything so at least no one outside the club is going to be able to see the revealing outfit I am wearing. I find myself getting more and more nervous as the cab drives through the city, trying to figure out what Christian has planned for tonight. He has not said if he plans to take me into a playroom or just observe; if we go into a scene what will it entail? He has been very hushed about what to expect for tonight which I think is all part of the plan. We arrive at the club some time later, Christian pays the driver before helping me out of the cab. I'm wearing pretty high heeled shoes which is something I'm not used to so I'm thankful for Christian's support getting in and out of the club.

"Do you remember the rules?" he whispers as we walk towards the entrance.

"Yes sir" I answer quietly.

"If it's too much or you feel uncomfortable use your safe word and I will take us some place to talk privately" he instructs.

"I understand sir" I answer with my eyes focused on the ground.

Christian leads me to the entrance where he provides our membership paperwork to the man at the door. Instead of going into Madame Serene's office, this time we enter the club through a side door. As soon as we enter, Christian removes his jacket and my own providing them to someone standing behind a desk that I cannot see as I concentrate on keeping my eyes on the ground. Christian leads me into a small room and locks the door behind us. I don't say a word, but can't help but wondering what we are doing in here.

"Bend over, hands on knees" he instructs and I immediately comply.

I feel Christian's hand run up and down my back, almost comforting me as I'm sure he can tell how tense my body is from nervousness. He pulls my thong down slightly, gently pushing my thighs apart causing me to gasp in surprise. He gently rubs my clit, his fingers moving through my sex and instantly I find my body relaxing under his touch. I can feel the juices on his hand as I find myself aroused very quickly. Christian's hand suddenly leave me, but I don't move or make a sound trying hard to focus on the rules of the club even though right now it's just me and Christian in this tiny room. I feel his hand press on my back, urging me to bend further. I bend at the waist further, my hands now around my lower legs as I feel Christian's fingers return to my clit again. Although I'm confused at what he is doing, my body immediately relaxes under his touch, and I find myself focusing only on his touch.

"Hmmmmm" I moan as I feel a cool wet object on my ass.

"Shhhhhhh relax baby" he pinches my clit just as he pushes the item inside of me.

I immediately recognize the item as a butt plug, it's not as wide or as long as the dildo he used on me last time but it feels slightly wider than the last plug he used. I force myself to relax and push back against the foreign item that is being pushed into me further. Christian's fingers continue their magic on my sex, rubbing and pinching my clit as he eases the plug into me further. Just when I think I can't take any more he pushes the item in a little further and I feel my body holding it in. He bends down and pulls my underwear back up which is when I realize that he is leaving this plug in me as we walk into the club.

"Does it hurt?" he asks pulling me up.

"No sir" I let out the breath I was holding.

"Are you ready?" he kisses me deeply.

"Yes sir" I answer after nipping his tongue lightly causing him to smirk at me.

My eyes fall to the floor as he opens the door and leads me by the hand to the bar area. With every step I take, I can feel the plug move inside of me. I can't help but wonder if anyone looking can see that it is in? The dress is completely see through and I do have a thong on; I just don't know if the thong would cover the end of plug. I haven't looked at a plug to know what the end of it looks like but I can tell this one has something on the end that seems to rest against my ass cheeks. Christian sits at the bar and offers me a seat next to him, but finding it uncomfortable to sit with a plug in I opt to stand next to him. My face remains down, my eyes fixed on the floor; I can't help but look around me as the room sounds very crowded. Christian hands me a glass of wine, but it has a straw in it so I don't need to lift my head up to drink it. From this angle I can't see much, but after a few minutes I see a girl crawling on her hands and knees slowly pause in front of me. I hear Christian and a gentleman speaking about sports; the man has a very strong accent but him and Christian carry on a conversation for several minutes. The girl in front of my feet is barely clothed, making me look overdressed I realize. She is essentially wearing a leather harness around her entire body with a leash attached to it which I assume the man who is talking is holding. I keep my eyes down, but can't help but look at her. She has a ball gag in her mouth, like me her eyes remain fixed to the floor. As she crawls away I see that she has a sort of tail sticking out of her ass and I gasp in surprise.

"Shhhhhh" Christian hisses into my ear.

I nod my head, keeping my eyes focused on the floor. I remain at Christian's side for what feels like hours, my feet are starting to get sore but I don't complain or say anything to Christian. Christian finishes his drink, takes my glass and places it on the bar before taking me by the hand into a large room further into the club.

"There's going to be a couple engaging in a public scene, would you like to watch?" he asks quietly.

"If you would like me to sir" I defer to him.

"Very good" he sounds pleased.

He leads me to a soft leather couch where he pulls me down next to him. I cringe when I sit, the couch pushing the plug into my ass further. My body immediately tenses at the discomfort, but Christian squeezes my hand urging me to relax further. I take a deep breath, slowly letting it out as my body adjusts to the new sensations.

"I want you to watch" Christian whispers pulling my chin up so I am no longer looking at the floor.

Looking up, I discover we have almost front seats to the stage. There are small loveseats placed throughout the room and a stage in front of us, with much of the same equipment that is found in the playrooms for. When I was here before I never knew this room even existed, yet here I am sitting with a few other couples getting ready to watch another couple engage in a scene. Glancing to my right I see a man on all fours on the floor with a woman's feet resting on his back. Like the girl from earlier, he has a ball gag in his mouth and a leash attached to a metal collar around his neck. I quickly turn my eyes away, thankful that Christian isn't into anything like that. It seems like that dom treats her sub like a piece of furniture; I don't think I could handle being treated like that by Christian.

A few moments later a man leads a blindfolded woman onto the center of the stage. She is completely naked, her hands are cuffed behind her back which pushes her breasts out further. I wonder if my breasts look like that when Christian restrains my hands behind my back…I've never actually looked down to see what they look like. For some time we sit and watch the couple engaging in various playroom activities, nothing that is too different than what Christian and I have done. I find myself getting turned on, not from watching this couple but from imagining Christian doing those things to me.

Christian takes my hand, gently urging me to stand as we quietly leave the room while the couple is still on the stage. He leads me through several long hallways before we enter a private playroom. I quickly glance up thankful to find we are the only ones in here.

"God, I can't stand this" he says, his lips crushing against mine.

"Christian?" I say pulling away, confused as to what he is talking about.

"Not being able to talk to you, having you standing there not talking…I can't handle it" he says pulling me close to him.

"Me too…there are so many times tonight I wanted to say something to you, or to at least look at you" I complain.

"Let's go back to the hotel" he says.

"Christian?" I pull him towards me.

"Hmmmm?" he asks.

I pull him against me, kissing him passionately resulting in a groan from him. His arms wrap around my waist, anchoring me to him; I feel his erection against me and I moan feeling how much he wants me.

"Not here" he pulls away.


	22. Chapter 22

_Author's Note: I'm touched that so many of you were happy to see Ana and Christian leave the club and not engage in a scene. I was concerned that some readers would be disappointed that they didn't stay but for these characters it didn't feel right…that's not the type of relationship they have which they are quickly realizing._

_We're obviously still in Taiwan, so expect a LOT of lemons!_

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James_

**Chpt. 22 APOV:**

Christian leads me out of the club after getting our jackets and hails a cab. As we sit quietly in the cab I'm glad that Christian decided to leave the club; it was much different than it was when we first met. It was as if I was in sub mode the entire time, not just while in the playroom. In a way though I think it was a learning experience, we both learned that neither of us could handle being in dom/sub mode outside of a playroom for that long of time. I was shocked at the number of doms who treated their subs as if they were beneath them, but it made me appreciate how gentle and kind Christian is. Even when we are in the playroom and he punishes me for something he never makes me feel as if I'm below him. We arrive back at the hotel where Christian once again assists me in getting out of the cab. We make our way to our room, I'm thankful the jacket Christian brought covers everything seeing as though my dress would give everyone a full show of my body.

"I'm so sorry" Christian says as soon as we are back in our room.

"For what?" I ask confused.

"For that…I had no idea it was going to be that intense" he answers. "I thought it was going to be like how it was when we met, I guess I didn't fully grasp the rules."

"It's not your fault, I'm glad we left though" I admit.

"I never want to do something like that again" he said pulling me close to him so I rest my head against his chest.

"Me either, let's stick to your playroom" I smile against him.

"That sounds like a good idea" he says. "But for now we can play here."

"Yes sir" I smile.

Christian gently peels the jacket off of me, his lips never leaving mine as he leads me into the bedroom. He quickly undresses himself, immediately I see how hard he is for me. I want so bad to touch him, but remind myself that right now Christian is in charge. He pulls my dress down, pausing to unclip the butterflies that were covering my nipples kissing them gently before taking the rest of my dress off. My nipples are sore from the clamps, but not as sore as they are after having a nipple clamp on them for some time. He slowly removes my bra and my underwear before kissing my entire body, ending on my lips.

"Turn around, bend over the bed" he instructs and I immediately comply.

"Ohhhhhhhhh" I gasp as he suddenly pulls the plug from my ass.

It surprises me how comfortable I had gotten with it in, I really only remembered it was there when we got into the cab as sitting down pushed it in deeper. Once we were out of the cab, I completely forgot it was in there. I'm confused at how my body reacts to anal play, I always thought it was wrong however now I'm struggling to find why it's so wrong.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh" Christian's fingers find my sex, gently rubbing me and applying pressure to my clit.

"Did you like watching the scene at the club?" Christian asks.

"Yes sir" I answer honestly.

"Did it turn you on?" he asks, gently pushing a finger inside of me.

"Yes sir" I blush.

"What were you thinking about while you watched them?" he asks.

"I was thinking it was you doing those things to me" I admit.

"So was I" he sounds pleased.

Christian leads me onto the bed, urging me onto my back as he lays over me. He kisses me deeply, his tongue exploring my mouth as he nips on my lips. I can feel his erection against my sex and I find myself thrusting my hips upwards trying to get him to touch me more. He ignores my obvious request, but continues kissing me, making a trail from my neck to my nipples to my stomach before stopping at my sex. He gently pulls my thighs apart before openly kissing my sex; he licks me everywhere, sucks on my folds, bites my clit all while I'm moaning in pleasure. When I least expect he, his tongue enters my core with his finger teasing me even further.

"Christian…." I moan.

"What baby?" he smirks, knowing what I need.

"I need to come…please let me come" I beg.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I scream as Christian thrusts a finger inside of me quickly.

"Come Ana" He orders, I combust the moment his mouth sucks my clit.

"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I moan finally coming down from the orgasm, my body continuing to tremble as Christian's fingers remain deep inside of me. He continues moving in and out of me slowly while sucking on my clit, keeping me in an aroused state.

Christian quickly pulls out of me, getting up from the bed before going to his dresser. I have no idea what he is doing but I close my eyes, waiting for him to return. Part of the thrill in being a sub is giving complete control over everything to Christian; right now I would rather not know what he has planned. Christian returns to the bed a few minutes later, his mouth quickly returning to my sex as if he never left. I had just come down from the orgasm and my body is immediately responding to his touch again. My body is quickly on fire with need and I'm sure Christian can feel the juices gushing from me. He quickly changes position, moving my legs so they are over his shoulders before thrusting into me deeply.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I moan as he hits that wonderful spot.

"Do you like that?" he asks.

"Oh God! Yes, yes! Don't stop" I beg as he continues to thrust into me roughly.

I close my eyes, losing myself in the pleasure as Christian manages to find that sweet spot deep inside me every time he plunges into me. I'm moaning in ecstasy as I find myself once again on the edge, desperately needing a release. Christian doesn't let up, his pace never slows as he continues plunging into me hard and deep.

"Christian….Please!" I beg.

"Come ANA!" Christian yells as he pinches my clit hard.

"CHRISTIAN!" I scream as the orgasm rips through my body.

I barely comprehend what Christian is doing but I feel him slowly moving in and out of my body, prolonging my orgasm. He gently pulls out of me, his fingers remain on my clit as I moan at the sudden empty feeling. Seconds later I feel him, cool and wet against me, this time further back and I realize he is at my ass.

"Christian?" I gasp.

"Relax baby" he says gently pushing the tip of his erection against my anus.

"Hmmmmmmmm" I moan as he slowly pushes into me.

I can tell it's only his tip inside of me, but he feels so huge! The feeling is uncomfortable, almost painful; my body immediately tenses at the new feeling. His fingers continue to play with my clit, pinching and rubbing it as he makes no effort to move into me deeper. I close my eyes, trying to concentrate on his fingers pinching and rubbing my clit, trying to ignore what is about to happen. I slowly feel my body starting to relax, to respond to Christian again.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh!" I moan as something begins vibrating against my clit.

I look between us and see that Christian has placed a small vibrator against me; the sensation immediately makes me forget everything else going on. I close my eyes, desperately trying to fight off the impending orgasm.

"Play with your nipples" Christian requests.

I moan, knowing this is going to push me closer to the edge but comply with his request. My entire body is on fire; I find myself trying to thrust my hips up, needing more contact to find my release but I don't find it. The vibrator sits on my clit, with enough pressure to keep me on edge but not enough to send me over. My hands rub and pinch my nipples as the need continues to build; I'm so close but still cannot find my own release.

"OHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" I moan as I suddenly feel very full.

I was so lost in the sensation of the vibrator and my own fingers on my nipples that it took me several minutes to realize that Christian was fully in my ass; I can feel his balls against me and his face is in pure pleasure. His eyes are closed, his head is back and he just looks to be in heaven right now. I'm not sure how I feel other than full, very very full.

"Oh God baby….you feel….so tight….so hot" Christian moans.

My breath hitches at the realization of what we are doing, but I quickly ignore these thoughts as Christian turns up the vibrator against my clit. Suddenly the sensations are overwhelming; the vibration on my clit, the fullness….it's all too much. I can feel the orgasm and know that when I come it's going to be hard.

"Oh Christian…..I'm so close" I moan.

Christian slowly moves in and out of me, setting a gentle slow pace which keeps me just on the edge…the need building even more. My legs are still against his chest so I have little control in this position, I subconsciously try to push my hips against him needing to feel him now as the vibrator isn't enough to push me over the edge. At this point I'm too desperate for my orgasm to feel embarrassed.

"I need to come….please sir…." I beg.

"Tell me what you need to come Ana" he commands.

Oh God, he wants me to say it. I'm sure he knows what I want; I can tell he is fighting off his own orgasm.

"Please…." I moan.

"Tell me" he orders, slowing his pace even further.

"I need you….Please….fuck me sir" I beg shamelessly.

"Tell me if it's too much" he says thrusting into me deeply.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream in pleasure.

It feels so good when he pulls out; the new pace is exactly what I needed. He is not thrusting into me as hard as he does when we are rough in the playroom; the pace is more fast and deep. I'm fisting the sheets, desperately trying to find that release but at the same time slightly scared because I know this orgasm will be one of the biggest I have ever had.

"Come baby" Christian directs.

"OHHHHHHHHHH CHRISTIAN! OH GOD! DON'T STOP!" I scream as the orgasm rips through me; I literally see stars before my eyes. I feel it through my entire body, it doesn't seem to end.

"OH ANA! I'm going to come….." Christian moans.

"Ahhhhhhh" I moan feeling him swell inside of me just before he screams my name finding his release.

He slowly moves in and out of me, riding out his own orgasm as he moves the vibrator off my clit finally giving my body a much needed rest. He pulls my legs off his shoulders, placing them on the sides of his hips before leaning up to me kissing me deeply.

"That was amazing…you felt…so amazing" he says breathless.

"I don't think I've ever….that had to be my biggest orgasm ever" I blush.

"Come take a bath with me?" he asks as our breathing returns to normal.

"Sure" I agree.

He slowly pulls out of me and I'm surprised at how empty I feel suddenly. I expected to feel relief but instead I just feel empty. I'm left feeling a little confused by this, but Christian doesn't give me a chance to dwell on it as gently lifts me out of the bed bridal style and carries me into the bathroom. He sits me on the step of the large soaking tub before running the water and adding some oils that were next to the tub. Christian steps into the tub before guiding me in so I am sitting with my back to his front between his legs. He leans back, bringing me with him and sighs in contentment.

"Did I hurt you?" he asks after a few minutes.

"When?" I ask confused.

"In the bedroom…just now" he clarifies.

"No, not at all" I blush.

"You're sure?" he asks.

"Yes Christian, I'm sure" I assure him.

"Did you enjoy it?" he asks nervously.

"I was surprised that I did" I whisper. "Did you?"

"You have no idea how much" he hugs me tightly. "To know that no one else has ever touched you like that, to know that I'm the only one…that no one else will ever touch you like that…"

My breath hitches realizing what he just said. He kisses my neck lightly while rubbing my back; I'm not sure he even realizes what he just said. I can't help but wonder if he meant it how it came out; I'm too afraid to know the answer to ask. All I know is right now I couldn't imagine letting someone other than Christian touch my body.

We crawl into bed that night, both exhausted still from the flight and tonight's events and quickly fall asleep Christian's arms wrapped around me tightly. We sleep throughout the night, thankfully Christian doesn't have any nightmares and we both wake feeling well rested. Christian orders room service for breakfast before taking a quick shower.

"When do you need to leave for your meeting?" I ask over breakfast.

"In an hour" he answers. "I should be back by early to midafternoon; I'm not sure exactly what time."

"Do you have other meetings this week?" I ask.

"Not yet" he sighs. "If everything goes as planned, I should wrap up everything today."

"That's good" I say.

"I thought maybe we could do a little sight-seeing before we leave?" Christian asks.

"I would like that; I didn't get to see much of the city last time I was here" I admit.

"I know you don't want to go back to the club" Christian pauses.

"But?" I ask nervously; I really don't want to go back there after last night but if it's something Christian wants I will agree to it.

"They have a store…I thought perhaps we could go and purchase a few items to bring back here" Christian avoids eye contact, almost as if he is embarrassed.

"I'd like that" I admit quietly.

"Really?" He sounds surprised.

"Christian, I still like our playtime…last night didn't change that" I assure him. "It just made me realize what I don't want."

"Me too" he sighs in relief. "Initially, that's exactly what I thought I wanted. I thought I wanted someone who wouldn't talk, would obey my every command and would just stand quietly unless I spoke to them. But….doing that with you felt so wrong last night and it made me realize it was not at all what I wanted."

"I hated not being able to look at you" I climb onto his lap, straddling him so I can see his eyes. "Not knowing what you were thinking, what you were feeling…even when we are in the playroom I can tell so much by your eyes. Last night I felt so disconnected from you…well until we left the club anyway."

"If you sit like this much longer I'm going to be late for my meeting" he smiles.

"Hmmmmmmmmm" I giggle.

"We will continue this later" he kisses me before lifting me off his lap.

My day went pretty quickly, I finished the manuscript I got lost in yesterday and notified the editing team that they should move forward with publishing it. My true test of a manuscript has always been whether or not I can lose myself in the story; if I can then I know it's likely to succeed, if not then it will need revisions or we will pass on it altogether. Before I realize it, the afternoon has flown by and Christian is still not back from his meeting. I decide to order us dinner assuming he will likely be hungry when he returns.

_Ordering dinner; hungry? –A_

_Be back soon…out with guys from meeting –C_

Well he doesn't answer me if he is hungry, so I decide to order him a plate anyway. I end up eating my dinner without hearing from Christian again; by the time he finally gets back to the hotel his food is likely ice cold. I hear him fumble with the door, trying to open it for several minutes before I open the door assuming his card is not working. He is a site…he is leaning against the doorframe barely standing and reeks of alcohol.

"ANA! I missed you" he stumbles into the room, engulfing me in a hug as the door closes behind us.

"Are you drunk Christian?" I ask laughing.

"No…." he giggles. "I only had a little to drink."

"How much?" I ask.

"Just a little" he holds up two fingers as if to show the amount of liquid he drank.

"I take it your meeting went well?" I laugh.

"Yes….very well" he hiccups. "They insisted on taking me out to celebrate!"

"Did you eat?" I ask.

"No…yes….some" he answers plopping on the couch.

"Are you hungry?" I ask.

"Yes…but not for food" he smirks.

"I don't know Christian…you're drunk" I shake my head smiling.

"Please baby…I just want to feel you…I need to feel your tight pussy around me" he pulls me closer to him.

"Christian!" I exclaim.

"It's true baby…I need you….I haven't had you all day" he complains.

"Have you been thinking about me?" I ask seductively.

"All day" he admits. "I couldn't get the image of you wearing that dress out of my mind…you looked beautiful."

"Did it make you hard thinking of me?" I ask.

"Oh God yes" he moans.

I decide I like drunk Christian, he is quite honest and very playful even a little blunt. I begin to wonder how playful drunk Christian would be…

"Are you hard now?" I ask.

"Come find out baby" he smirks.

"No, tell me" I say sternly.

"Yes…I'm so hard for you" he admits.

"Let's go to the bedroom" I walk away and in takes him half a second to follow me.

"Oh I can't wait to get you into bed" he moans, stumbling to take off his clothes while walking.

"I'll be right back" I say going into the bathroom.

I quickly use the bathroom, brush my teeth and take off all my clothes before taking a deep breath and opening the door. As I expected, Christian is laying butt naked in the center of the bed his erection standing at full attention. He smiles at me realizing I am also naked…

"Come here baby…I want you so bad" he moans.

"Shhhhh…." I climb onto the bed straddling his lower legs.

"You're too far away" he whines.

"Put your hands above your head" I say.

"What?" Christian says quickly.

"You heard me…heads above your head…no touching" I stroke his erection waiting for him to comply.

"Ana…I…." he stutters.

"I'm waiting" I stroke him a little tighter.

Christian groans but puts his arms above his head and I quickly take him into my mouth. I focus on just the tip, sucking him, letting my tongue explore him and driving him crazy. I can hear his breath hitch and increase as he bucks his hips below me, desperately trying to get me to take him deeper. I ignore his gesture and continue sucking on just the tip.

"Ana….baby…." he moans.

"What Christian?" I pull away from him for a moment.

"I need you" he says.

"I'm right here" I take him back into my mouth, this time taking him deeper but not to the back of my throat which I know is what he loves. I continue this pace for several minutes; my hands are on his hips trying to hold him still as he tries to push himself deeper into my throat.

"Ohhhhhhhh" he moans.

I see his hands come to his sides and I pause what I'm doing, glaring at him until he notices and puts his hands back above his head. I never thought I would take control like this, but I find myself getting aroused. It's very arousing having Christian moaning below me, knowing that I am doing this to him.

"Do you want me Christian?" I ask.

"God yes…Baby I want you so bad" he moans.

"Keep your hands there" I say as I slowly crawl up his body.

"Yes…Ana…let me feel your tight, wet pussy" he moans.

I blush at how blunt Christian is being right now, but the reality is it doesn't embarrass me but turns me on as I feel the evidence of my excitement on my thighs. I crawl up to his face, kissing him deeply, holding his hands in place as he tries to embrace me. I gently rock my sex against his erection, coating it with my juices as he moans with need. I push down on my hips slight, allowing him to just slide into me.

"Ohhhhhh….yes….Ana!" He moans as I lean up taking him in fully. "I love being inside of you."

I gently start moving up and down against him, feeling him glide in and out of me as the need quickly takes over. I run my hands along his firm chest as I continue to ride him, feeling him become harder inside of me. I can tell by looking at him that he is fighting not to come wanting me to find my release first. The fact that he can be so caring even in his drunk, sexually aroused state makes me hotter than before. I bend forward slightly, allowing him to rub against my clit every time I move against him.

"Yes….that's it baby….ride me!" he yells.

"I'm so close Christian…" I moan. "Tell me you're close, I want to come with you."

"I'm there baby…." He moans squeezing his eyes shut.

I increase the pace, slamming myself onto him before pulling up so only his tip is inside of me. I continue this pace for several minutes until we are both panting and moaning in desire.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream as I feel him swell inside of me which triggers my own release.

"FUCK! ANA!" He yells as I feel him empty himself into me.

I collapse on this chest but continue to move against him, allowing us to ride out our orgasms. His arms finally wrap around me, holding me against him tightly pushing my hips down so he remains deep inside of me. I can't believe how incredibly hot that was, I've never taken control like that before. Knowing that Christian couldn't touch me, that I controlled everything just made it that much more arousing. I could see why Christian enjoys taking control and being a dominant; I would never want to do it in a playroom but here in the comfort of a bedroom which was strangely arousing. I feel Christian sigh under me, glancing up I realize he is fast asleep. It's a struggling, but I finally manage to unwrap Christian's arms from around me so I can get up and use the bathroom. Christian doesn't move, he remains naked in the middle of the bed in the same position he was when I came out of the bathroom earlier I realize. I quickly get washed up before climbing back into bed with Christian, pulling the covers over us before falling asleep.


	23. Chapter 23

Author's Note: 280 reviews! I'm shocked and humbled that so many of you have reviewed the story! Thank you for your support!

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 23 APOV:**

The next morning I wake before Christian which isn't surprising considering how drunk he was last night. He doesn't move as I make my way to the bathroom, deciding to take a quick shower before ordering breakfast. I start the water and climb in; the water cascades down my body as I think about the events of the last couple of days. I was so happy that Christian didn't want to engage in a scene at the club, even though I know it would have been different in that playroom since it was just us and we didn't have to follow the rules it just didn't feel the same. Once we were back in the hotel room, I immediately felt relieved and relaxed with Christian. I blush deeply, remembering the scene at the hotel after the club and the way my body responded. Then last night, there was drunk Christian which was a first…I've never seen him drunk before and I have to admit it was kind of fun to have him so relaxed.

"Can I join you?" Christian opens the door to the shower.

"Of course" I smile.

"You were naughty girl last night" Christian kisses me deeply, his erection rubbing between my legs.

"Who? Me?" I say innocently.

"Do you need to be reminded who is in charge?" he asks sternly but with a smile letting me know he is only half serious.

"Maybe I do sir" I answer, his eyes immediately go dark as they fill with desire.

He wraps my hair in his hand, pulling down so my head is forced up. His lips crush hard against mine, almost painfully hard as his tongue thrusts into my mouth. I moan as his erection continues to rub against my clit and I feel my juices coating him as my body responds quickly to him.

"On your knees" he orders before nipping my tongue. "Hands behind your back."

I immediately fall to my knees, clasping my hands behind my back as he directed. He stands in front of me, stroking his erection in front of my face for several minutes. I desperately want to reach out, to touch him, to taste him but I know right now this isn't what he wants. He strokes himself until a drop of liquid emerges at his tip at which point he pulls my lower jaw down so my mouth is open and thrusts himself in. Immediately he hits the back of my throat, causing me to gag at the unexpected feeling. He pulls my head against him, pushing himself in deeper, pushing himself past my gag reflex. I struggle to relax my throat, to take him and finally my body complies and I swallow around him. He moans loudly, moving back slightly before thrusting back into my throat deeply. He continues this for what feels like forever and I realize he is doing now exactly what he was trying to do last night when I was teasing him.

"Oh God….don't stop….that's it take me deeper" He moans as he pushes himself further down my throat.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" he screams as he empties himself, still deep in my throat.

I struggle to take everything, to swallow everything while he is in this position. He pulls back slightly, allowing me to swallow easier. I continue sucking him, his dick slowly softens in my mouth. I can tell he is struggling; his dick continues to twitch in my mouth almost as if it going to become hard again. Suddenly Christian pulls out of my mouth, lifting me up to him before kissing me deeply.

"You feel so good when you do that" Christian nips my ear.

"I've never…you're the only one who's ever done that" I blush.

"You've never taken someone like that?" He asks surprised.

"Not that deep, not like that" I say embarrassed.

"Hmmmm…another first baby" he smiles.

"How do you feel this morning?" I ask as we wash up.

"Not as bad as I expected" he admits.

"You were pretty drunk last night" I giggle.

"That I was" he laughs. "They kept ordering drinks, most of which I've never heard of."

"You're quite entertaining when you're drunk" I smile.

"Tell me, did you enjoy yourself last night?" he smirks.

"Hmmmmm I did….so did you" I lean up and kiss him.

"I'm glad you didn't restrain my hands…I don't think I would have been able to handle that" he whispers holding me against him.

"Why?" I ask quietly.

"When he would….when he would beat me or burn me he would hold my wrists behind my back" he answers sadly.

"Oh baby…I had no idea" I rub his back slowly.

"Just don't…." he stutters.

"I won't, I promise I will never restrain your hands" I vow. "I just wanted to have a little fun with drunk Christian last night, I didn't even think it would…"

"It didn't baby" he interrupts. "And for the record, I liked seeing you take control last night. You seemed so confident, so in charge. It's like when you are in CEO mode…it's so hot. It didn't bother me that you told me to put my hands above my head, or even when you held them in place because I knew if I needed to I could move them. I'm just asking that if that happens again, just please don't –"

"I promise" I repeat.

"Thank you" he sighs.

"So…CEO mode is hot?" I giggle, trying to change the subject seeing as he is becoming uncomfortable.

"When you take charge, it sure is. The first time we met with Barney, Welsh and Taylor after your apartment was destroyed and you took control, it was so hot" he smiles.

"Hmmmm who knew?" I say surprised.

"We should get out and grab some breakfast" he turns of the water. "Just put a robe on."

"Okay?" I question.

"We are going to go back to the club and do some shopping after we eat" he explains. "We may not be in the club to play but I want you dressed in the outfit I brought."

We order in room service as I sit the luxurious robe the hotel provided, completely naked underneath. I find myself turned on at the thought of Christian dressing me like he did the other night. I don't know what type of things they might have the store but the idea of shopping for sex toys to bring back here is very arousing. After breakfast Christian goes into the bedroom, requesting I stay in the living room once again as he lays out my clothing for the club today. A few moments later, Christian opens the door and instructs me to get dressed. I close the door behind him before checking out the outfit he has picked out for me to wear. Today, it seems I am going to be dressed as a naughty school girl which causes me to giggle. I slip on the black thong which is completely see through before putting on the plaid skirt which isn't long enough to cover my ass cheeks. There is no bra to put on, so I put on the white button down shirt which comes to around the middle of my ribs. I slip on the heels and necklace I wore last time to the club before stepping in front of the mirror; I hate to admit it but I do look sexy in this outfit. Turning around I realize my ass cheeks are on full display and if it's cold outside my nipples will be as well. My sex is somewhat disguised but under the bright light you can easily see the outline of it.

"Holy shit baby….you look hot" Christian opens the door, looking at me up and down very slowly.

"You like?" I ask spinning around, the skirt lifting as I do.

"You're going to be lucky if I don't fuck you in the cab on the way to the club" he smirks.

Once again, Christian puts the long black coat on me before we leave the room to catch a cab. I'm not nearly as nervous as I was last night…today I know we're only going into the store not into the club itself. When we arrive, we enter through the same door as we did last night and Christian gives our jackets to the person behind the desk. My eyes remain on the floor as Christian leads me through the hallway in the opposite direction of where we were last night. I hear him talking to someone, explaining that we are only looking to shop today before he ushers me into a large room.

"You can look up now" he whispers, squeezing my hand tightly.

For a moment I'm taken back, the room contains every piece of equipment, every toy, every outfit imaginable and even those you can't. I don't even know what half the items are in the room, but Christian slowly leads me up and down the aisles. It's like you're at a grocery store, except instead of food they sell sex toys and torture devices.

"That's what the one girl was wearing last night" I whisper to Christian gesturing to a butt plug with a tail at the end of it.

"Not my thing at all but some people enjoy it" he says.

"I'm glad you don't" I giggle.

"You should keep your sub quiet" a stern voice from behind the counter says.

"And I think you should mind your own business" Christian says sternly. "I believe the rules state the sub should only speak when the dom tells her to. Not that it's any of your concern, but I instructed her to speak to me before we entered this room."

"Hmmmmmm" the guy says.

"Thank you" I whisper.

"Does anything here interest you?" he asks as we continue walking.

"Why don't you pick out something? I don't even know what half of this stuff is" I answer. "Surprise me."

"I like that idea" he smiles. "Keep your eyes down so you don't see anything."

"Yes sir" I reply quietly.

We walk around the store for some time; Christian keeps his hand in mine the entire time. I hear a few other voices and realize that others have entered the store. My face immediately blushes thinking of my ass on full display for everyone to see. A glance down confirms that my hardened nipples can easily be seen through the fitting white shirt. I glance around without making it obvious; I see another dom and sub in the same aisle. The female dom is dressed in all black leather which is complimented by fishnet stockings and high black heels. Her sub is dressed in leather shorts with pink ruffles on the ends and a black leather bra which wouldn't be so bad if her sub wasn't a male. I bit my tongue trying to keep a straight faced as I watched this poor man being led around by a leash while wearing a bra. Christian squeezes my hands and leads me down another aisle. I keep my eyes down, really not wanting to see much more than I already have. I can see several pairs of feat walking around the store and it's obvious that business is starting to pick up. Every so often I would see female feet or a sub crawling on the floor which makes me thankful that Christian isn't like that. I can't imagine walking around the club or the store in front of others on my hands and knees like some of these subs.

"Your receipt sir" The man behind the counter who was rude to us earlier says.

"Thank you" Christian says taking several bags in his hand.

"May I?" the man questions.

"You most certainly may not!" Christian exclaims angrily pulling me out of the store.

He doesn't say a word but quickly leads me back to the coat check where he covers me with the long jacket before we step outside.

"Christian?" I ask as the door shuts behind me.

"He was asking to touch you" he grimaces.

"Ew" I say in disgust.

"We will not be coming back here" he says with confidence.

We get in the cab and head back to our hotel. Christian has the bags from the store in his hand but I can't tell what is in them as we take the elevator to our floor. We quickly return to our room; Christian takes off my overcoat before taking the bags to our room.

"Take off your panties" Christian instructs putting his hand out.

I immediately comply, removing the see through thong and giving it to him. The air is cool on my exposed sex; Christian doesn't say anything but stares hungrily at me. He takes my hand and guides me to the edge of the couch before gently pushing on my back so I lower myself over the arm of the couch. My ass and sex are on full display for him since the skirt doesn't cover anything when I'm standing and it covers even less when I'm bent over like this. Without warning I feel him thrust the ben wa balls into me, pushing them deep inside of me without giving my body much of a chance to react. I breath through the discomfort but don't say anything; Christian is in full dom mode right now and must need a scene I realize. I gasp as I his hand lands sharply on my ass; it doesn't hurt but causes the balls inside of me to hit that wonderful spot. He slaps me ten times before pulling me back up; I'm panting heavily from the excitement and arousal.

"You are not to come without my permission today" he says sternly.

"Yes sir" I reply trying to get my breathing under control.

"We are going sightseeing but first I would like you to make us some lunch" he instructs.

"Yes sir" I agree.

I slowly walk to the kitchen, feeling the balls move inside of me with each step. It takes me much longer than it should to make two subs and bring them to the dining room. I place the plates down but stand next to the table awaiting Christian's instructions.

"Something to drink perhaps?" he asks.

"Yes sir" I slowly return to the kitchen, grab two bottles of water before returning to the table.

"You may sit and eat" he instructions.

"Yes sir" I say.

We eat our lunch, making small talk about the various sites we want to see. Christian continues to seem on edge; ever since we left the club he hasn't seemed like himself. I can only assume that the sales person's comment, and likely gesture, really got to him. I don't know why he would let it affect him but for some reason it seems to. After we finish our meal, I clean up the dishes; the entire time I can feel Christian's eyes on me watching my every move. Knowing that he is watching me, likely watching my ass, is strangely arousing to me. He informs me he would like to leave in a few minutes and it's at that time I realize that he's not going to let me change clothes before we leave. I blush at the thought of walking around the city wearing this skimpy outfit sans undergarments. He hands me the overcoat without saying a word, leading me down to the main lobby and out onto the street. We catch a cab rather quickly and spend the next few hours touring the various sites of Taiwan. After much walking, my body is on the edge; I desperately need a release but Christian has completely ignored my obvious discomfort.

"There's one more place I would like to visit before we end our day" Christian announces as we get in yet another cab.

"Yes sir" I mumble, disappointed that we are not returning to the hotel.

A short ride later we arrive at our destination; getting out of the cab I realize we are at the Lin Family Mansion and Garden which I've only ever seen pictures online. The gardens are breathtaking; it's easy to see why it is noted to be one of the four great gardens of Taiwan. We spend the next two hours walking throughout the beautiful gardens and taking a private tour of the residences which I can only assume Christian arranged since places like this typically only host group tours. I find myself speechless when taking in the architecture of the various buildings some of which trace back to 1847. Nothing has been overlooked in preserving these beautiful pieces of history.

"Christian this is….amazing" I say in awe as we stand at the edge of the pond.

"I hoped you would like it" he kisses me on the cheek.

We stay at the water for several minutes, enjoying the peacefulness of our surroundings before we head back to the main entrance and get a cab. Christian instructs the driver to take us back to the hotel which I know will be some distance from where we are now given how much we have traveled today. I gasp quietly as the cab hits a pothole causing the balls inside of me to hit that wonderful spot. This slight move puts me back on the edge, desperate for the release I have been denied so much today. My entire body feels like it's on fire as the cab continues to drive down a very bumpy road. My breath increases as I desperately try to force my body to relax; I quickly realize this is not going to happen as the balls once again hit my g spot perfectly. Within minutes I feel the impending orgasm and know that I'm not going to be able to hold it back. As the cab hits one more bump in the road, the orgasm finally hits, taking over my entire body. Luckily I have the sense not to scream or moan as my head falls against the back of the seat, but Christian immediately looks at angrily knowing exactly what just happened. He says nothing but puts his hand forcefully between my thighs feeling the evidence of my orgasm. I immediately blush deeply, glancing at the cab driver who thankfully remains oblivious to what just happened. Christian doesn't say anything but pushes my legs back together and glares at me for the rest of the cab ride. I know I disappointed him; I'm disappointed in myself for not being able to withhold my orgasm like he instructed.

"You came without permission" Christian says as he closes the hotel door behind him.

"Yes sir" my eyes are focused down but I can feel his eyes on me.

"You came in a cab with a stranger in the front seat!" he exclaims, pulling my jacket off of me and tossing it to the side.

"Yes sir" I say embarrassed.

"Go to the couch, bend over the arm rest again" he instructs before going into the bedroom.

I slowly walk over to the couch and lay across the armrest as he instructed. Christian doesn't return for several minutes and although I wonder what he is doing I don't move. I hear the shower running but I know better than to move from the position he told me to be in. My legs begin ache from standing in this position for so long when I finally hear him open the bedroom door behind me. Without warning I feel a paddle hit my ass hard; I wince it pain and swallow the cry as the second hit comes quickly.

"Who do your orgasms belong to?" Christian asks as he hits me again.

"You sir" I sob.

"Are you allowed to come in the backseat of a cab?" He asks swatting my ass again.

"No sir" I cry out in pain.

"Do you like coming in front of strange men?" he asks.

"No sir!" I exclaim.

"Will you ever do that again?" the paddle hits my ass hard again.

"No sir!" I scream.

"Who do you belong to?" He requests.

"You sir, only you!" I sob.

"Who is the only person allowed to see you come?" the paddle lands on my ass harder than before.

"You! You sir!" I scream.

Without warning I feel him pull the balls out of me and just when I think I'm going to get some relief he slams into me hard. He doesn't say anything but forcefully thrusts into me, nearly pushing my body off the couch. My body has no chance to acclimate from the sudden intrusion as he continues to fuck me hard. His hand is on my upper back, holding me in place as he pulls nearly all the way out of me before slamming back into me. Despite the recent orgasm, the paddling and the forcefulness in which Christian is continuing to enter my body I feel myself getting aroused again.

"You will NOT come" Christian says sternly clearly sensing my body responding to his act.

"Yes sir" I pant.

Just when I think I can't take anymore I feel Christian swell inside of me as he thrusts harder and deeper into me than before. Moments later he grunts finding his release inside of me; he pushes himself further in me as if he thinks he can get any deeper than he already is. He pulls out of me slowly, letting me feel his entire length slide out of me before lifting me off the couch.

"Clean me" he instructs.

I immediately fall to me knees in front of him, he guides his erection into my mouth. Immediately I taste my own juices on him but I look past this and take him deep in my mouth. I can feel him begin to soften as I suck him, milking every drop of come out of him. He says nothing but his hand rests gently on my head as I continue sucking on him.

"I'm very disappointed Ana" he sighs. "If it was becoming too much you should have alerted me that you were approaching your breaking point. Instead you let yourself come in front of a complete stranger in the back of a fucking cab!"

I sob silently realizing he is right. I must have looked like a slut coming in the back of a cab; I should have used my safe word, I should have conveyed to him that I was getting close. After spending a wonderful afternoon touring the city together I regret that my lack of communication resulted in a punishment toe end our day. He is completely soft in my mouth but he makes no move to pull out; I continue to explore his manhood with my tongue and my lips.

"Do you remember your punishment for coming without permission last time?" Christian asks.

I immediately gulp remembering the punishment all too well; my punishment was to wear a butt plug all night and most of the next day. He pulls my head back so his soft erection falls from my mouth, his eyes on me clearly waiting for an answer.

"Yes sir" I whisper.

"Good. Go to the bedroom, in the bag is a small butt plug. Bring it to me along with the tube of lubricant that is in there" he instructs before sitting on the couch.

I quickly make my way to the bedroom, sorting through the bags before finding what he requested. I see several new toys in the bags which excite me further but I know this isn't the time for them. Right now I need to gather the items he requested and return to the living room.

"Did you find everything?" he asks as I return to the living room.

"Yes sir" I hand him the plug and lubricant.

"Very good. Now on your hands and knees in front of me, your ass facing me" he orders.

I nervously drop to my hands and knees, facing away from him as he instructed. My skirt is once again around my waist covering absolutely nothing.

"Why am I doing this?" Christian asks.

"To punish me, sir" I answer quietly.

"Why do you need to be punished?" he ask.

"Because I didn't communicate that I was approaching my breaking point sir" I answer honestly.

"Very good, I am pleased that you are able to identify the real reason you are being punished" he grabs my ass and I feel him separating my cheeks gently. "Your ass is a beautiful shade of pink right now."

"Yes sir" I whisper.

"Hmmmmmmmmmmmm" I whimper in discomfort as he pushes the butt plug into me.

"Be a good girl and relax your body" his hand gently goes up and down my back.

I gasp as he pushes the final part of the plug into me, holding it there while my body instinctively tries to push it out. Slowly my body relaxes and holds it in place; at least with the last punishment I was in the midst of pleasure when the plug was put in so this time it feels much more like a punishment. Christian gently guides me from the floor to the couch next to him; I immediately cringe as I sit down the plug is pushed further inside of me.

"Are you okay?" his eyes are full of concern.

"Yes sir, I'm fine" I answer honestly. While it's uncomfortable it is nothing I can't handle.

"This isn't how I wanted today to end" he sighs.

"For that I'm sorry, you were absolutely right to punish me" I admit.

We spend the next couple of hours getting lost on our smartphones; both of us checking and responding to various emails about our companies before we decide to call it quits for the night. We take our turns in the bathroom getting ready for bed before taking our clothes of and laying next to each other. Christian pulls my back against his chest, anchoring me close to him.

"I love you" he whispers.

"I love you too" I say sleepily.


	24. Chapter 24

_Author's Note: The last chapter received some pretty mixed reviews but I wanted thank each of you for your feedback. I'm hoping this chapter clears up some of the questions that some of you had regarding the punishment at the end of the chapter. _

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James_.

**Chpt. 24 APOV:**

I wake the next morning to find my hands are secured above my head; I panic briefly before feeling a tongue on my sex. Without looking I know Christian is under the blanket between my legs; my head falls back as my body relaxes. I glance at the nightstand next to the bed to see how early it really is but to my surprise I see the butt plug sitting next to the clock. I quickly realize it is no longer inside of me yet I don't recall feeling Christian take it out at any point. I'm surprised and somewhat confused to see that it is on the nightstand given that my last punishment involved the plug for all night and a significant portion of the following day.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh" I moan as Christian sucks hard on my clit suddenly.

He doesn't say anything but pulls my thighs further apart so he can have better access to my drenched folds. His finger gently rubs against my sex, avoiding where I want to feel him the most. I try to arch my hips, desperate to feel him inside of me but Christian ignores my request. He continues to suck and nip my clit for several minutes before he finally slides a finger into me. It's not enough to send me over the edge, but it's enough to keep me there while his mouth continues to work it's magic on me. I'm moaning and squirming in pleasure; I tug at the restrains holding my hands in place wanting to touch Christian.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhh God!" I moan as a second finger joins the first.

"Come when you can baby" he says, before latching onto my clit sucking with even more force.

"Don't stop…..please…..CHRISTIAN!" I scream as my back arches off the bed finally finding the release that I've needed for so long.

Christian doesn't stop; he continues sucking on my overly sensitive clit prolonging the orgasm so I barely have a chance to come down before the next one builds. I whimper in slight discomfort as the next orgasm builds quickly.

"Christian….it's too much….too sensitive" I whine as his tongue plunges inside of me.

He doesn't say anything; his tongue continues to thrust inside of me while his fingers play with my clit. Despite my orgasm moments ago, I feel the next rushing to the surface. My entire body feels like it's on fire, every time his fingers touch my clit or his tongue rubs against my throbbing walls I feel it throughout my body.

"Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm" I moan as Christian's mouth finds my clit once again.

"I want to taste you again" He says, blowing against my clit gently.

"FUCK!" I scream as he thrusts two fingers deep inside of me.

"Come Ana" He instructs.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I yell as the orgasm hits me hard.

I'm vaguely aware of Christian's mouth on my sex, his tongue lapping the juices that I can now feel dripping down my ass. He tongue roams my entire sex as if he is looking for any evidence of my orgasm that he might have missed. Satisfied that he got it all, he slowly kisses his way up my entire body before finding my mouth. His tongue enters my mouth allowing me to taste myself on him, his erection is firm against my sex.

"Good Morning" he nips at my ear.

"I could get used to waking up like this" I smile.

"I'm so sorry for yesterday" he buries his head in my neck.

"For what?" I ask confused.

"I was too hard on you; I shouldn't have punished you like that" He admits quietly.

"Christian, you were right to" I sigh. "I could have embarrassed both of us in the cab…I should have told you before it got to that point."

"I should have realized" he says in frustration. "It's my fucking job as your dom to take care of you, to be aware of your needs and I didn't fucking do it."

"Christian" I kiss his forehead gently. "Untie my hands please."

He looks at me confused but complies with my request; moving up me slightly so he can unclip my hands from the fabric restraints that I realize I've never seen before. I can only assume they are attached to the bedframe or somewhere below the mattress and that he must have purchased them yesterday since I doubt he brought them along on our trip. As soon as my hands are free, I wrap them around his shoulders pulling me close to him.

"Baby, it's okay. I should have used my safe word or at least told you I was approaching my limit" I run my hands through his hair.

"No! It's my fault damn it! I didn't even think to remind you to use your safewords if it became too much" his voice full of disappointment.

"I think we both made mistakes yesterdays" I sigh after a few minutes of silence realizing we both are right. "Christian we're both very new to this; we're going to make mistakes."

"But I shouldn't punish you because of my oversight" he admits quietly.

"Christian it's done now, there's no point in dwelling on it" I say. "I'm not mad."

"Why not? You should be!" he says frustrated.

"Because I'm as much to blame as you are" I admit. "Please, can we move pass this?"

"I suppose" he sighs kissing my neck as I run my hands up and down his back.

"What time is our flight today?" I ask a few minutes later when I feel Christian's body relax into mine.

"Not until three" he says.

"Any plans for today before we leave?" I ask.

"No" he answers. "Is there anything you would like to do?"

"I'd like to find a gift to bring back for Kate if you don't mind" I say.

"Sure, let's take a shower and we can shop before we have to pack our stuff" he replies.

Our shower is quick, Christian washes my hair and my body but doesn't give me a chance to do the same to him before he gets out of the shower. We rarely take showers that quick, I think to myself. I can't help but wonder if he still feels guilt over the punishment last night. I finish my shower and return to the room to find that Christian is already in dressed and in the living room. I throw on a pair of skinny jeans and a fitting short sleeve top before joining Christian in the living room. He looks me up and down slowly before sighing and asking if I was ready to go. We have breakfast at a small café near the hotel before spending a couple hours going through several shops in the city. I find a key chain and picture frame for Kate that I think she will like. Christian doesn't buy anything but doesn't complain as I drag him into several different stores before head back to the hotel. Returning to the hotel I realize Christian has barely touched me since waking me up this morning. He's had his hand in mine or on my back the entire time we are out today but he hasn't touched me since this morning. I know he was aroused this morning, I could feel him against my sex when he was on top of me but he made no effort to satisfy his own needs. I can only assume that Christian is punishing himself by denying himself a release like he did with me yesterday because of his guilt. We still have two hours before we need to leave for the airport and packing our staff won't take very long so I quickly develop a plan and put it into action. While Christian is checking his email in the living room, I close the bedroom door behind me and take off my clothes before taking a deep breath and walking back into the living standing in front of Christian.

"Ana? What….Your clothes…." He stutters looking up at me.

"I want you" I whisper into his ear as I straddle him. "One more time here before we leave."

"But…I…." he tries to find the words as I grind my damp sex against his hard erection.

"Please baby….don't you want me?" I nip his ear.

"Always Ana….I always want you" his hands find my hips, pushing me against him.

I unbutton his shirt, slowly pulling it off of him as I kiss him deeply. My hands fall between us, struggling for a few minutes but eventually unbuttoning his pants. He lifts us both up so I can push his pants and underwear down which fall around to his ankles. I slide down him, kissing his chest and tight abs until I fall to the floor kneeling between his legs. I take his erection deep into my mouth causing him to gasp in surprise. I struggle but manage to take him pass my gag reflex and swallow around him earning me a loud groan from above me. His hand rests gently on my head, but he continues to allow me to control the movements. I continue to bob my head up and down slightly, holding him deep in my throat often as I know he enjoys this position. I can hear his breathing increase as he struggles to not come and I know my plan is working. He moans as I pull back completely but grabs me as I crawl over him again pulling me against him before his mouth finds mine. I slowly lower myself onto him, allowing him to slide into my drenched sex as my tongue thrusts into his mouth. I begin to ride him slowly before increasing the speed, slamming myself into him so he is deep inside of me. His hands are on my hips, urging me but allowing me to set my own pace. His breathing is heavy and his body is tense; it's obvious he is holding back his own orgasm.'

"Christian…you feel so good" I moan and let my hands roam my own body before settling on my chest.

"Those are mine" he smirks, pushing my hands from my breasts his fingers pinching my hard nipples.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh Baby….I'm so close" I say.

"Come Ana, let me feel you" he moans as I slam into him again.

"I want to come with you….I want to feel you swell when you come….I want to come when you do" I say thrusting harder and faster than before.

"Ana…this is about you" he squints his eyes shut, obviously approaching his breaking point.

"And I want you to come….I want to feel you deep inside me….the way you get even bigger inside of me when you come turns me on even more….please baby" I beg

"Oh God! Baby….I'm….." Christian screams, my words clearly pushing him over the edge as I feel him swell inside of me.

"Yes baby….Please….let me feel come….I want you to feel you so bad….I'm so close" I moan.

"ANA!" He screams as I feel him burst hard inside of me.

"CHRISTIAN! Yes BABY!" I yell as his own orgasm triggers mine.

I continue riding him, slower this time but prolonging our orgasms before Christian's arms wrap tightly around my waist pulling me against his chest. I listen to his heart beating rapidly as I run my fingers through his hair trying to calm my own breathing. His hands rub my back up and down as his breathing finally returns to normal.

"Ana….that was…." He lets out a breath. "I've never heard you talk like that."

"You were punishing yourself" I tell him.

"Yes" he sighs.

"I thought we moved past yesterday?" I ask.

"It just still didn't seem right" he admits quietly.

"Please Christian….please don't dwell on it" I beg him. "We were both wrong, we need to learn from our mistakes."

"I felt I should be punished because I punished you" He whispers.

"Oh Christian" I say before kissing him deeply. "It's over. Let's leave this mistake in Taiwan."

"Okay" he sighs.

"Promise me" I say.

"I promise" he replies after a few moments of silence.

"We should pack our bags" I point out.

"Did you enjoy our time here?" He asks nervously.

"I did" I admit. "I think we both learned a lot about what we want and what we don't want from the lifestyle."

"That we did" he smiles.

"It was nice to tour the city, I didn't really have much time the last time I was here to sightsee" I say.

"As many times as I've been here, I've never once taken the time to see the city either. It was nice experiencing it with you" he replies.

We spend the next hour packing our bags; Christian decides against bringing any of the new toys home with us saying he can only imagine what customs will say when they scan our luggage. I laugh at the thought but it seems silly to throw away everything after he spent money on it. He shrugs it off before putting all the toys in a box to take to the trash in the hallway, obviously not wanting any of the staff to find the toys in our room and having it get back to the media. Christian explains that his public relations department had to issue a statement while we were gone about the Hyde incident as the media was calling them constantly. He showed me the statement which was very well written which basically stated that while Christian was visiting his girlfriend at the company she owned a disgruntled former employee entered the building with a gun. It goes onto to say that security quickly apprehended him; there is no reference of any injuries to Christian's security team, Elizabeth or Hyde. Reading the statement immediately brings me back to reality; I realize this trip pulled us both away from everything that was going on.

The trip back to the Seattle is long but uneventful; Christian and I are both unusually quiet. I think we are both concerned with returning to reality; the last several days have been wonderful getting away was exactly what I needed. Now with the thought of returning to Seattle, my mind immediately starts racing with the all the things that need to occur. I'm concerned with how I'm going to manage SIP and Seattle E books; I doubt that I can return to SIP without panicking every time I walk into the building. I think I need to give some serious consideration to Christian's offer to have SIP move into his building. I plan to at least try to go to SIP tomorrow even if it's only to gather items to work on at home. Perhaps it won't be as bad as I think; Christian had said everything was being replaced in several of the offices.

I must fall asleep on the plane because a short time later Christian is waking me telling me to put on my seatbelt as we are about to land in Seattle. I do as he instructs, stretching briefly in my seat as I watch the Seattle skyline come back into view. Even though I'm dreading returning to reality, I realize I have missed the city I have come to consider as my home. I hear Christian take a deep breath as we make our way off the plane as he guides me the baggage claim.

"Taylor!" I exclaim seeing him already collecting our luggage.

"Mr. Grey, Ana…how was your trip?" he asks.

"It was good…how are you feeling? Are you sure you should be lifting the bags?" I ask concerned.

"Ana, I'm fine….Mrs. Grey has returned me to full duty" he smiles.

"Good to have you back Taylor" Christian nods.

"Good to be back sir" he agrees.

Taylor has the car parked in short term parking and we quickly make our way to the awaiting SUV. I'm thankful that there are no reporters at the airport waiting for us as Taylor had mentioned they were around Escala earlier this week when the public relations statement was initially released. Taylor informs us that Sawyer has been released from the hospital and is recovering well from his injuries. He is expected to return to full duty within the next couple of weeks. Jack Hyde continues to hang on at the hospital although doctors still consider him in grave condition. He is on life support and they do not expect him to last much longer as his organs are beginning to shut down. Apparently he has no family who can make medical decisions therefore doctors will continue treating him until there is nothing more they can do. Elizabeth remains in prison, having been denied bail for her involvement with Hyde.

"Sir, ma'am we are here" Taylor pulls us both from our thoughts.

"Thank you Taylor" Christian says.

"Where shall I take the luggage to?" Taylor asks.

"I can take my bag to my apartment Taylor, thank you" I say after an awkward pause.

"As you wish" Taylor says handing me my small bag.

"Taylor I will meet you upstairs" Christian says as the elevator opens on my floor.

"Yes sir" Taylor agrees.

Christian walks me to my apartment, taking my bag from me as I open the door. We both walk in and immediately I realize how empty the apartment feels. It's going to be such an adjustment to be here every night, but it's something that I will obviously need to get used to. Once again I open my fridge to find it fully stocked despite there being next to nothing in it before we left. Christian gives me a small smile but offers no explanation; however I'm sure it's Gail that I need to thank.

"I should probably get some work done" Christian says as we just sort of stand in the middle of my apartment.

"As should I" I agree. "I'm sure I have several emails waiting for me."

"I guess….I will see you then" Christian says awkwardly.

"Bye Christian" I say kissing him before he opens the door.

I spend the rest of the day unpacking, washing my clothes and catching up on emails that I have neglected while we were gone. I heat up one of the many frozen meals in my freezer that Gail prepared while I was gone before heading to bed for the night. I know the time difference is going to hit me tomorrow so I try to fall asleep early but find myself tossing and turning most of the night. When the alarm goes off the next morning I realize how little sleep I truly got last night. I'm surprised the jet lag is hitting me so bad as the effects were minimal when we flew to Taiwan. I slowly make my way to the kitchen, starting a pot of coffee before heading to the shower. Although I don't typically drink coffee today is going to be an exemption given how exhausted I am. I take an extra-long shower, letting the water cascade over my body as I desperately try to find the energy to start my day. Thankfully there are only two days of work this week before the weekend; by then I hope the jet lag has eased and that I'm at least sleeping more soundly.

"Good Morning Ms. Steele" Stacy greets me as I walk into the office a short time later.

"Morning Stacy…how are things?" I ask.

"It's good to have you back" she says avoiding the question.

"Can you please come into my office so we can catch up?" I request.

"Yes Ms. Steele" Stacy follows me into my office.

"What's really going on Stacy?" I ask.

"Staff are very on edge ma'am" she admits. "Although everyone knows that Jack Hyde cannot get into the building there is obvious concern for their safety. I think people were just shocked with what happened and it's taking them some time to wrap their heads around it."

"I want you to know that I'm considering relocating the office" I take a deep breath.

"I think that might be a wise decision" she agrees. "I think staff might feel safer if security was better with this building…however with the building being so old and having multiple entrances it is difficult to find a security solution."

"I agree" I sigh. "The layout of this building is not very conducive to insuring safety measures are followed.

"Please let me know how I can assist you" Stacy says before leaving the office.

As uncertain as I was this morning, walking in here just now and talking with Stacy for the last few minutes I know without a doubt that I need to move SIP out of this office. It will put a temporary strain on our finances however the alternative of having numerous staff leave is not worth it.

_Do you have time to meet today? –A_

_I can meet in an hour? If you need me earlier I can leave meeting I'm in now –C_

_No, one hour is fine –A_

_Is everything okay? –C_

_Yes -A_

I'm very nervous about this but it has to be done. Even if I tried to find another building to rent it would take too much time and right now time is not on my side. Sitting behind my desk my mind immediately returns to the incident with Hyde only a few days ago. I watch the scene replaying over and over again; I see Hyde burst through my door, Sawyer getting shot, Hyde raising his gun at me and the sound of the many gun shots. I cringe when I think of everything that happened that day and how different it could have turned out. I can't blame the staff for not feeling safe here; I don't think I will ever be able to feel safe in this building. Glancing at my clock I realize I need to leave to meet Christian, really not knowing where the last hour went. I drive the short distance to GEH and meet Taylor in the lobby; Christian must have told him I would be arriving although I don't think it's necessary for him to meet me down here. Taylor escorts me to the elevator and once we arrive on the executive floor, directly into Christian's office.

"Is everything okay?" Christian kisses me as Taylor closes the door.

"Yes, I'm sorry if I worried you" I say hugging him close to me, feeling safe in his arms.

"Rough time?" he asks.

"Yes" I sigh. "About that…I would like to take you up on the offer if it still stands."

"Which offer is that?" he raises an eye brow.

"I would like to move SIP into the empty space you have if you would still consider renting it to me" I say taking a deep breath.

"Of course baby, I can have our legal department prepare a lease right now" he smiles.

"Thank you" I let out the breath I didn't realize I was holding as relief comes over me.

"Are you okay?" he asks as we sit on the couch.

"Yes….no…I don't know" I admit. "I thought I was fine until I walked into the office this morning. Most of the staff feel unsafe at the office and there is no possible way to reorganize the office to increase security. I realized within minutes of being there that we needed to leave. Even if us renting this space is only temporary I think we need to move if I'm going to have any chance of keeping my staff."

"You can rent the space as long as you need it. Would you like to tour the space today?" he asks.

"I'd like to have Stacy and Mr. Roach join me, perhaps we can tour the space this afternoon?" I suggest.

"Sure that's fine; I may not be available but Andrea can show you the space. It's completely outfitted with phone and internet; it's fully furnished but obviously you will need to bring in any specific equipment you might have. I have a moving crew that I've worked with before that I can have Andrea give you the number to if you would like" he says quickly.

"That would be helpful" I agree typing an email to Stacy and Mr. Roach requesting they come here at 2pm today.

"When do you want the lease to start?" he asks.

"As soon as possible" I answer.

"The space is ready…is Monday too soon?" he suggests.

"No that's fine. I can close the office for the day and have everything moved in at that time" I agree.

"You will have a lease in your email by the end of today" he says sending off an email. "Let me know any modifications you would like done to the space and I will see that they are completed this weekend."

"I'm sure that won't be necessary" I say.

"Ana….I'm glad that you trust me enough to accept my offer" Christian pulls me close to him a few minutes later.

"Would you mind if I set up in the office I used last week and got a little work done?" I ask.

"Of course not, no one has been in there except you" he answers before walking me into the office next to him.

I spend the next couple of hours getting work done: responding to emails, reading reports and reviewing our financial statements. I send an email to all staff announcing a mandatory staff meeting for tomorrow morning at which point I plan to announce our move. Part of me feels guilty for going away for a few days but I know I probably would have been useless had I not spent some time away. There is no way I would have been able to concentrate on anything so soon after everything that happened.

Taylor informs me that Stacy and Mr. Roach are here; Andrea and I meet them in the lobby before going to the second and third floors. As Christian said both floors are completed empty and fully functional; offices and cubicle areas are set up throughout both floors as well as large storage rooms that we could easily use for our files. Stacy and Mr. Roach both agree that the space will work well; technically we only need one floor but having the second floor will allow us room for expansion or if we host large meetings as the one floor only has a small conference room. Andrea provides Stacy with the moving company's contact information and Stacy agrees to contact them as soon as she returns to SIP. I instruct her that no matter what the cost I want the move to occur Monday. Mr. Roach and I meet to review several key areas that will be effected by the move and any scheduling conflicts that might occur on Monday.

The remainder of the day is spent at GEH before I finally feel the exhaustion hitting me. I wanted to let Christian know that I was leaving but Andrea said he was in a meeting in the board room. I asked her to pass along the message that I was leaving but would be in contact with him tomorrow. The drive home is quick, I heat up another frozen dinner from Gail before retiring early to my bedroom. Unfortunately it's another long night of tossing and turning; another exhausted morning greats me as the alarm goes off.

"Good Morning Ms. Steele, everyone is waiting for your in the large conference room" Stacy says as I walk into SIP.

"Thank you," I say avoiding my office completely and walking directly to the conference room.

SIP doesn't have too many employees so we don't need much space for a staff meeting. Space only becomes an issue when we invite several author's to meet with a large group of editors; for those meetings the second floor at GEH will come be very helpful.

"Good Morning everyone" I greet and wait for everyone to take their seats before continuing. "Thank you all for meeting with me on such short notice this morning. I know things have been….hectic since the incident last week and for that I apologize for. The incident last week stood to remind us how insecure this building truly is. There are too many exits to have a proper security system in place; there is no main area for security to greet guests when they arrive. As you know this building is very old and it would be very costly to reconfigure the building to meet our needs. In light of everything that happened last week, I am announcing that as of Monday we will be relocating our office to just a couple of blocks from here. We will be leasing two floors in the Grey Enterprise Holdings building and will share their lobby and security. All employees will be issued a new badge that will be swiped before moving through the lobby. All guests will be announced and if necessary screened by the security team. Our office will close on Monday for the move to occur and will reopen at GEH on Tuesday. I am requesting that before you leave today you pack up your offices. Stacy has boxes available; be sure to mark your name on the box before you leave so we can insure it arrives at your office. Any questions?"

The room is silent, everyone is surprised but I also see relief in many eyes around the room. I meet with Roach and Stacy to discuss the packing of several main areas; Stacy informs me that the moving company is sending over a team today to help pack some of the areas I was concerned about. I take several boxes and spend the next couple of hours packing my office. As long as I keep busy I'm able to keep my mind off of everything that happened here only a matter of days ago. The remainder of the day is thankfully spent outside of my office assisting Stacy in packing different offices up and reviewing our needs with the moving company. I leave the office a little early and head back to the apartment as exhaustion once again finds me…I need to find a way to sleep through the night as the last two nights have killed me.


	25. Chapter 25

_Author's Note: I had a minor mess up in the story that I need to clarify. Initially when Ana and Christian were talking about their businesses she said that her father died and left her money which she used to start the publishing company in New York. However when Ana was describing how her and Christian met in Taiwan she tells Kate that she was there looking for warehouse space for her dad. In order for the story to continue and make sense, I needed to fix this error. It's going to be Ana's mom who died and left her the money she used to start the business. Her dad is going to still be alive since that was her reason for being in Taiwan. I sincerely apologize for this oversight!_

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 25 CPOV:**

_"Owwwwwwwwww!" I scream as he hits me again._

_The mean man is holding my hands against my belly as he hits me with his belt; it hurts so bad. Mommy is on the couch next to me but I can't reach her since he is holding my hands. I call for her but she doesn't open her eyes. Can't she hear me? Why isn't she waking up?_

_"Mommy! Help me! Please Mommy!" I scream loud but the mean man keeps hitting me._

_"I hurt Mommy" I cry as the man kicks me and throws me on the floor. _

_"Don't hurt my Mommy!" I yell as I see him moving Mommy on the couch._

_"Shut up you bastard! If you don't want me to hurt you then shut the fuck up!" He screams._

_He takes Mommy's clothes off but she isn't moving. Her eyes are closed; why doesn't she wake up?_

I wake up screaming and covered in sweat from yet another nightmare; I make my way down to the great room and once again sit in front of the piano. It's now three in the morning; I managed to sleep for almost four hours which is more than I've slept the last couple of nights. Every night since we've come back from Taiwan I've had horrible nightmares; initially I chalked it up to jet lag but by now I'm usually adjusted to being back in Seattle. Flynn is away on vacation so I can't get into see him for at least another week but I know I will be miserable if I continue to not sleep every night until then. As I sit at the piano, my mind drifts back to Taiwan instantly remember the wonderful time I had there with Ana. We definitely had some bumps along the way with our trip including the club, the store and the punishment that I never should have given her but overall I think we both enjoyed the trip. I haven't seen Ana since Thursday when she came to my office to look at the vacant floors to move SIP into. I was never so happy then to hear her say that she wanted to take me up on the offer to rent the space. I'm obviously not thrilled with the reason she needs to rent the space, but knowing that she will be safe and in the same building every day as me just makes my heart swell. Yesterday I was in meetings and phone conferences all day and didn't get a chance to call Ana liked I had hoped. I'm going to wait until a more reasonable time to call her and see if she wants to get together this weekend. I'm surprised at how empty the apartment feels without her being here and even more so how empty my bed feels.

_Can I see you today? –C_

Finally around 8 I decide it's late enough to see if she wants to meet up today. Unfortunately a couple hours go by before she responds.

_Just arrived at my dad's house…won't be back until tomorrow night. Sorry __L__ -A_

Well at least she ended the text with a frown face, although I'm very disappointed that she left and didn't tell me she was leaving town. I have to remind myself that she doesn't owe me an explanation or have to clear her plans with me. The weekend slowly passes by; I spend most of the time in my office sorting through various reports that came through while we were away. Saturday night brings another sleepless night by Sunday afternoon I'm nearly falling asleep on the drive to my parents' house for dinner.

"Christian! Darling you look horrible!" Mom greets me at the door.

"Thanks Mom, you look wonderful too" I kiss her on the cheek before shaking hands with my dad.

"Have you not been sleeping again?" Mom asks before we head into the great room where everyone is gathered.

"I think it's just jet lag" I lie. "I'm sure I will adjust soon enough."

"You've been back since Wednesday though right?" she asks.

"Yes" I sigh.

"Your body should be adjusted by now" she points out. "Do you need something to help you sleep?"

"No, I'll be fine" I say.

Over the counter sleep aids have never helped me sleep and I end up just feeling worse in the morning, almost as if I have a horrible hang over. My mom knows I have nightmares and knows I don't like to talk about them so I'm sure she is seeing right through my lie. Walking into the great room I see Elliot, Kate, Mia, some guy and my dad. Mia quickly introduces me to 'Mark' who apparently she has been seeing for a couple of weeks now. I can tell she is nervous about introducing him to me; I haven't exactly been easy on her last few boyfriends. In my defense most of them have been low lives with no jobs and no possible future. I don't want someone like that for my baby sister, she deserves to be with someone who can give her everything she wants and Mia wants everything!

"So Mark, what do you do?" I ask as we sit down for dinner.

"I'm a student right now, majoring in business administration" He says nervously.

"What do you hope to do after college?" I inquire.

"I plan to continue on for an MBA and then my goal is to assist companies who are struggling in restructuring and organizing their businesses to become more marketable" he explains.

"That's not too different from what you do Christian" Mia points out.

"Well, there are some difference" I reluctantly agree.

"Christian dear, where is Ana tonight?" Mom asks.

"She is visiting her father in Portland for the weekend" I sigh.

"Did you have a nice time in Taiwan?" Dad asks.

"It was very nice; we were able to tour the city and see many sites that I didn't even know existed before this trip" I smile at the memory of walking through the gardens with Ana.

"I talked to Ana last night, she said she had a wonderful time" Kate speaks up.

Knowing that she told Kate she enjoyed our trip made me smile. I tune out the rest of the conversation at dinner; my thoughts once again surround Ana. I can't help but wonder if the reason my nightmares have increased in frequency and duration is because Ana is no longer sleeping in my bed. It doesn't seem like the answer could be that simple; all I know is when I sleep next to her I'm able to go back to sleep after a nightmare, I wake feeling rested and the nightmares according far less than they have been since she moved back into her apartment. I feel frustrated that Dr. Flynn is on vacation and can't meet with me, I desperately need to know what this means.

"You should bring Ana with you next Sunday" Mom walks me to the door.

"I'll ask her" I smile at the thought that my mother wants to see Ana.

"You look so happy when anyone talks about her, I can tell how much you love her" Mom kisses me on the cheek.

"How?" I ask stunned.

"I can tell by the look in your eyes, dear. You love her" Mom states matter of fact.

"I do" I sigh. "She just moved back to her apartment when we came back from Taiwan."

"Why?" she asks.

"With Hyde and Elizabeth in police custody there is no longer a threat" I explain.

"Was the only reason she was living with you for her safety?" she asks.

"That was the reason she moved in with me yes" I answer.

"So she slept in one of your guest rooms?" Mom smirks.

"Well, no of course not" I admit quietly.

"Then it doesn't sound like that was the only reason she stayed with you" Mom points out. "You could have easily put her up in a hotel and hired round the clock security for her."

"I could have" I admit.

"How did you sleep when you were Taiwan?" Mom asks.

"Very well" I sigh, wishing I could sleep like I did when we were there.

"And when she was living with you?" Mom asks.

"I still had nightmares of course, but not as often. Sometimes it would only be once a week and I was always able to go back to sleep afterwards" I answer.

"It sounds like she kept your nightmares away and made you feel safe" Mom says cautiously.

"She did" I smile sadly.

"When are you going to ask her to move back in with you?" Mom asks.

"I don't know" I pause. "What should I say? Please move in with me so my nightmares stay away?"

"Why don't you think about why she keeps your nightmares away and start there?" Mom suggests.

"I'll think about it" I take a deep breath. "But what if she says no?"

"What if she says yes?" Mom counters.

"I'll see you next Sunday" I give my Mom a quick hug before darting out the door leaving her stunned behind me.

On the way home I think about everything that happened over dinner and what my mom suggested. I can't help but think it's selfish of me to ask Ana to move back in just to keep my nightmares away. I need to be able to offer her something more, to give her a reason to want to move in with me. She just purchased an apartment of her own that I'm sure she plans on living in. When we came back from Taiwan I thought I would be satisfied with seeing her every weekend like we originally agreed to before all the Jack Hyde mess but it's only been a few days since I've seen her and I can't stand it. I find myself actually looking forward to going to work tomorrow because SIP is moving in which means Ana will be there. It takes everything in me to not go downstairs to her apartment right now; I don't know what I would say when she opens the door. I don't know what I want from her; I just know I want to see her.

Sunday night passes by just as the every night has since we came back from Taiwan; another nightmare which only ends with me drenched in sweat, panting heavily before finally calming down at the piano. I managed to sleep for about three hours before the nightmare found me, once again starting the day feeling exhausted. Thankfully I have a pretty light day scheduled, a few conference calls and one morning meeting is all that is scheduled besides Ana moving in.

"Taylor, I want to know the minute Ana arrives at GEH" I instruct as we arrive at the office.

"Yes sir" He agrees.

"Andrea!" I call as I get settled into my office.

"Yes Mr. Grey?" Andrea quickly appears at my door.

"Have coffee and donuts waiting on the second floor for the SIP staff when they arrive" I request.

"Yes….but…." she pauses.

"What is it?" I snap.

"I spoke with Stacy this morning, they are not scheduled to arrive until noon sir" Andrea mumbles.

"Okay" I sigh, hoping Ana would arrive in the morning. "Arrange for sandwiches and drinks to be delivered when they arrive."

"Yes Mr. Grey" Andrea leaves the office quickly.

_How's moving going? –C_

_It's going –A_

_If you need more help let me know –C_

_We're okay, just loading the last in the truck now –A_

The morning drags on, I barely pay attention in the meeting and find myself easily snapping at everyone. Even Ros comments about my mood; telling me to go back to whatever I was doing before I went to Taiwan because apparently I was a much easier person to deal with then.

"Mr. Grey?" Andrea calls me through the intercom.

"Yes Andrea" I answer.

"Mr. Taylor asked me to inform you that the moving truck from SIP has arrived and they are unloading now" Andrea says.

"Very well" I reply.

I find myself smiling at the fact that Ana is now only a few floors below me; I'm tempted to go down and see her but I know right now she is likely busy sorting out where everything goes. I decide to check on her in a couple of hours; hopefully by then she has some time to spare. The last thing I want to do is interfere with her company getting set up today as I know her goal is for them to be fully operational tomorrow morning. The afternoon passes by almost as slow as the morning did, I find myself struggling to stay awake and focus on the reports in front of me.

"Mr. Grey?" Andrea pulls me from the report that is making my eyes cross.

"Yes" I snap.

"Ms. Steele is here to-" Andrea says.

"Send her in" I bark.

"Ana" I rush to the door the moment she walks through and wrap my arms around her. I can only imagine how desperate I must look but right now I need to feel her in my arms.

"Christian" she gasps as I look up. "You look horrible."

"Thanks" I smirk.

"When was the last time you slept?" she asks.

"Last night" I answer.

"For how long?" she asks in an accusatory tone.

"Three hours" I admit.

"And the night before that?" she asks.

"Four" I answer quietly.

"Why?" her hands find my hair as she rests her forehead against mine.

"I've been having nightmares" I whisper.

"Oh baby" she kisses me gently on the lips. "Get your stuff."

"What?" I step back.

"We're leaving" she walks to my desk, picking up my cell phone and suit jacket.

"No, Ana it's not even three o'clock" I point out, my day is far from over.

"Andrea, please cancel Mr. Grey's appointments for the remainder of the day he will be leaving the office shortly" Ana says into my intercom.

"Yes ma'am" Andrea responds clearly startled.

"And ask Taylor to get the car ready" Ana requests.

"Ana, I can't…." I begin.

"Yes you can and you are. You need sleep and quite frankly so do I. We are going back to Escala where we are both going to get some sleep" She hands me my suit jacket which I reluctantly put on.

"Why do you need sleep?" I ask as Taylor drives us back to Escala a few minutes later.

"What?" she asks confused.

"In my office, you said that you need sleep too" I point out.

"Because I haven't been sleeping well either but at least I don't look like death warmed over me. I've been able to get more than a few hours of sleep at night" she replies.

"Why haven't you been sleeping?" I ask concerned.

"I don't know" she sighs. "I thought it was jet lag but…"

"Sir, ma'am we have arrived" Taylor announces as I realize that neither of us noticed the car even stopped.

"Thank you Taylor" Ana steps out of the car.

"Where to?" I ask as approach the elevator.

"Your place" she answers quickly. "The bed is bigger."

Taylor enters the code to the penthouse and Ana lays her head on my chest just as the doors close. I wrap my arms around her, pulling her close to me realizing in this moment how much I have truly missed her over the last few days. Taking her hand in mine, I lead her upstairs to my bed where we both strip out of clothes and crawl into my bed. I immediately pull her close to me, her back against my chest and hold her tightly.

"I've missed this" she admits.

"Me too" I whisper.

I fall asleep moments later, for the first time in my life I fall asleep long before the sun goes down. I sleep soundly for the next several hours, waking only when I feel Ana leave the bed to use the bathroom. Glancing at the clock I realize just how long we have been asleep as it's after eight, I realize this is the longest I slept in several days without a nightmare.

"Did I wake you?" Ana asks as she comes back into the bedroom.

"Only when you got out of bed" I pull her back into bed next to me.

"Did you sleep?" she asks, lying back down next to me.

"I did," I admit. "Thank you."

"You shouldn't have gone so many days without sleeping like that" she points out.

"I know" I sigh. "But it wasn't something I could control."

"You should have called me" she says.

"You should have told me you weren't sleeping good either" I counter.

"You're right" she sighs. "I hope you didn't have anything important scheduled this afternoon."

"No, my meetings were in the morning…I think it was one conference call I still had on my calendar" I say. "It was kind of hot though."

"What was?" she asks confused.

"You taking control like that" I smirk.

"Ah yes…my CEO mode that you think is hot" she giggles.

"Very hot" I nip her ear as I pull her against my hard erection showing her just how hot I think it was.

"So hot" she moans moments before her lips find mine.

"I need you….I'm not going to last long" I admit.

"Please Christian" she begs, grinding herself against me.

I flip her over quickly and thrust into her causing her to call out in surprise. Her legs wrap around my waist, her fingers dig into my ass holding me deep inside of her as my lips crush against her. I can feel her walls trembling around me, gripping me tight and I know we are both going to come fast. I struggle to pull back from her but finally manage to before thrusting hard back into her; I'm rewarded with a loud moan as she clenches around me again.

"Oh God!" Ana screams as I pull her thighs back and thrust hard into her.

I can feel she is getting close; her walls are clenching me so tight I can barely move, her fingernails are digging into my ass desperately trying to control my pace and she is breathing rapidly. I move my body up slightly, changing the angle so that I'm rubbing against her clit every time I slam into her.

"Christian! Please….Oh God…..Don't stop…." She moans.

Not wanting to disappoint, I continue pulling out of her nearly completely before slamming back into her and quickly feel my balls tighten as my orgasm approaches. She clamps down on me and squeezes the orgasm from me just as she screams my name finding her own release. She pulls me into her, pushing me deeper inside of her as I spill myself into her.

"Wow…that was…." She runs her hands up and down my back as I lay on top of her.

"An appetizer baby" I smirk.

"Huh?" she looks at me confused.

"That was an appetizer…I'm going to feed you dinner and then we are coming back for round two" I smile. "It's been too many days since I've been inside of you."

"It's only been four days Christian" she points out.

"Four days is too many, I need you at least that many times in a day" I tell her.

"Christian!" She smacks my ass, clearly thinking I'm joking but I'm not so sure. I never can seem to get enough of her.

"Will you stay with me tonight?" I ask as we get dressed so we can head downstairs for a late dinner.

"Yes" she smiles.

I let out the breath I didn't know I was holding and take her hand, leading her downstairs. Gail left a note on the counter indicating there are several items in the fridge that we can eat including reheating instructions. Ana chooses to heat up the macaroni and cheese; her eyes gleaming when she says it's her favorite comfort food. We laugh as I admit this is one of my favorite foods as well. We eat our dinner, making small talk about the office move and plans for the remainder of the week. I'm so close to asking her to move in with me but I want to first see if it's a fluke that I was able to sleep just now without a nightmare. I need to know that we both need to sleep next to each other to sleep soundly at night; then I need to figure out how to ask her to move in with me. I take our dishes to the kitchen as Ana finishes her glass of wine; I quickly grab a bottle of whip cream out of the fridge before returning to the dining room.

"What's that for?" Ana asks.

"My desert" I smirk.

"What are you having for desert Mr. Grey?" she asks innocently.

"You" I grab her hand, leading her quickly up the stairs back to my room.

The door is barely closed before her lips crush against mine as she pushes me against the wall. The can of whip cream falls to the floor as we struggle to take each other's clothes off fast enough. She grinds herself against my now hard erection as her tongue thrusts in my mouth. I lift her up by her ass, carrying her to the bed before picking the can of whip cream up from the floor. She smirks at me as I put the can next to her and crawl over her beautiful body.

"Now don't move" I instruct her as I open the can and spray a small amount of whip cream on her nipples.

"Oh God that's cold!" She exclaims, nearly jumping off the bed.

"Don't move…you don't want to be sleeping in whip cream tonight" I warn.

I gently nibble and suck the whip cream off her nipples before applying more, this time leaving it on her hard nipples. She moans as the coolness sets in and I continue on my mission, kissing and nipping her skin until I reach my destination. She yelps loudly as I spray a small amount of whip cream just above her clit, clearly she was not expecting that. I pull her thighs far apart before putting whip cream on the crease between her thigh and her sex. Glancing up I can tell she is having trouble controlling her movements; the whip cream from her breasts now slowly sliding down soon to end up on my sheets.

"Look at the mess you made" I reach up scooping up some whip cream with my tongue from her nipple.

"Maybe you should clean me up" she smirks.

"Oh I fully intend to" I smile.

Ignoring her nipples, I slowly make my way back to her sex where the whip cream is starting to drip just onto her clit. I start with crease of her thighs; kissing, sucking and occasionally biting as I clean away the whip cream. She is moaning loudly above me as she grips the sheets; I can smell her arousal which motivates me even further knowing how hot this is making her. I move to the other thigh, repeating the same movements as moments ago; Ana's hands grip my head urging me closer to her sex. I chuckle but continue on task as she moans in disappointment. After cleaning the last bit of whip cream off her thigh, I run my tongue up her sex finally reaching her clit where I can taste both the whip cream and Ana. The taste is wonderful and only gets better as she continues to move allowing the whip cream to slide onto her clit.

"OHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" She moans loudly as I flick her clit hard with my tongue.

Running my fingers along her sex I can feel just how aroused she is right now; her folds are drenched in excitement, her hands are gripping my head tight against her clit as she moans above me.

"Christian….please…..I…" she begs.

"What do you need baby?" I pull back slightly from her.

"You…I need you" she moans.

"I'm right here…you need to be more specific" I tease.

"Oh God!" she yells as I pull her clit gently with my teeth. "I need you to fuck me! Please Christian!"

"Tell me how you want me to fuck you" I instruct.

"Hard and fast….please Christian! I need you!" she screams.

"Turn over" I pull away from her sex completely causing her to moan at the loss of contact.

She quickly complies with my request, rolling over and kneeling up on all fours. Her sex and perfect ass are on full display for me; I take a moment to just admire her beautiful body grateful that it's all mine. I run my fingers up her sex coating them in her juices before bringing them up further to her perfect tight hole. She moans at my touch as she tries to push back against me; I repeat the process two more times before plunging into her now dripping sex.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" She screams as her walls grip me tightly.

"Don't come yet" I push gently against her tight rear entrance with my finger as my erection is deep inside of her.

"Oh God! Christian! Too much…..I need to come!" she moans bucking against me.

"Not yet….hold it baby" I tell her.

With my finger sliding in and out of her tight ass, I begin fucking her hard and fast as she wanted. Her moans and screams only motivate me further as I struggle to hold back my own orgasm not wanting this to end. Her head falls to the bed; as the need becomes more desperate and she begins to thrust her hips against me, meeting me thrust for thrust.

"CHRISTIAN! PLEASE!" she screams.

"Now Ana….COME!" I push a second finger into her, pushing her over the edge as I feel her walls grip me tightly.

"Don't stop….God…..Don't Stop! OHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" she screams as the orgasm finally hits.

I don't let up on my movements; I fight the urge to find my own release as her walls nearly hold me in place. I continue thrusting into her hard and deep, not letting her orgasm end as my fingers now mimic my actions on her sex.

"Christian….please…." she moans.

"What baby?" I thrust into her deep, hitting her cervix as I plunge my fingers deeper into her ass.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh….too…..much…." She screams.

"Do you want me to stop?" I ask.

"No…..yes….." she moans.

"I want to feel you come again" I tell her, increasing the pace in both holes.

"CHRISTIAN! I can't…." she lies as I can feel her body responding, preparing to come again.

"Yes you can….you're so close, I can feel it. The way you grip me when I'm deep inside of you; not only my dick but you're also gripping my fingers so tight I can barely move them" I say, knowing that she has a hard time holding back when I talk dirty to her.

"NOoooooooooooooo" she moans as I just move my fingers in and out of her as her ass grips me tighter.

"Yes…feel it….God your pussy is tightening around me too… I can barely move" I thrust into her deeper.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" she moans loudly.

"Your pussy is throbbing against me…You're so tight….tell me you can come again baby, I love the way you feel when you come while I'm deep inside you" I whisper in her ear as I push deeper into both her holes.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh….don't stop…." She moans.

I lay across her back, reaching my other hand under her to rub her clit as I thrust deeper into her.

"That's it baby….Oh you feel so good" I nip her ear.

"I'm so close….Oh God…..You're so deep like this" she says; her words nearly pushing me over the edge.

"Come with me Ana" I pinch her clit which is all it takes as I feel her detonate around me.

"ANA!" I scream as my balls tight and I explode inside of her.

"We made a mess on your bed" she giggles as we both finally come down from our orgasms.

"So we did" I agree, seeing the whip cream from her breasts all over the sheets.

"Let's get washed up and then we can change the bedding" she suggests.

I gently move myself back and forth inside of her before pulling completely out, I watch as a small amount of our juices slip from her sex and slide down her leg. There's something about this site that is very arousing, I feel my dick twitch from the site alone despite the intense orgasm just minutes ago. I take her hand and lead her to the bathroom, where I take a warm washcloth and clean the evidence of our orgasms from her thighs and her sex. She blushes deeply at this action, but allows me to continue. Once we are both washed up, we change the sheets and crawl into the bed quickly falling asleep wrapped in each other's arms.


	26. Chapter 26

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 26 APOV:**

The alarm on my phone goes off the next morning and for the first time in days I wake feeling rested, despite our adventures the night before. I blush remembering the mess we made on Christian's sheets with the whip cream as they lie on the floor next to the bed. Christian moans next to me, pulling me against his warm body his erection pushing against my ass cheeks. Thankful I had the foresight to set my alarm for an hour early, I gently push back against his erecting as his fingers find my nipples. I can't believe this man is ready to go again so soon after everything last night but it was a lonely four days without him. Seeing him yesterday was a real eye opener for me; I thought I was the only one suffering without sleep but now I realize he suffered much more than I did. I wish he would have called me and told me his nightmares were every night and that he was struggling to sleep.

"What time is it?" he nips my ear.

"Five" I answer.

"Why are we up so early?" he moans.

"Because I had a feeling you would be waking up like this" I push my ass against his hard erection.

"Hmmmmmmmmm you were so hot last night" he whispers in my ear. "The way you came so hard on me, the way you gripped my fingers, the way your pussy held me deep inside of you."

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh" I moan loudly as he pinches my clit as his finger mimics the act on my nipple.

"One day I'm going to take you in the playroom and keep you there for hours, trying to see how many times I can make you come and in how many different ways" he says.

"Ohhhhhhhhh" I moan at the thought.

"You like that idea?" he asks.

"Yes" I gasp as he slides a finger into my wet sex.

"This weekend" he says.

"Yes!" I exclaim as a second finger enters me.

He thrusts his fingers in and out of me forcefully before removing them quickly, leaving me feeling empty. He lays on his back, I sit up grasping his erection and taking it deep in my mouth. I hear him moan loudly as I take him deeper, although not as deep as he would like as this position is not conducive to that.

"I want to see you ride me" he says moments later.

I begin to turn around but he holds me hips firmly and turns me so I'm facing away from him. Understanding what he wants I straddle him so my back is facing him and bend slightly over his legs lowering myself slowly onto his awaiting erection. He grabs my ass and pulls me down harshly as he thrusts himself deep inside of me. There is something very erotic about this position which is new for us; knowing that he can watch himself go in and out of me right now arouses me even more. His hands pull on my ass, guiding me to a pace that he wants while letting me control how deep I take him. My hands are gripping his tight calves as I feel the orgasm building deep inside of me; his breathing hitches telling me he is close.

"Yes baby, that's it. Let me see your tight pussy ride me" he says.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhh" I moan, his words nearly sending me over the edge.

"You're so tight….so perfect….play with your clit baby" he instructs.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh….I'm so close….." I moan as my finger applies the slightest pressure to my clit.

"Make yourself come" he commands.

"Oh God!" I scream as I begin to take him in harder and deeper.

I can feel his eyes on me, knowing that he is watching our connection waiting to see me come pushes me over the edge and I scream out his name as the orgasm rips through my body. My body goes limp but I feel him forcefully moving me up and down, thrusting himself deeper into me until he finds his own release and I feel the familiar warmness inside of me. I grind myself against him, prolonging his orgasm and not wanting to break our connection. He pulls me up so I'm sitting on him, taking him deeper than before as his orgasm finally subsides. His hands run up and down my back, gently massaging me as our breathing finally begins to return to normal.

"We should get ready for work" his voice full of disappointment.

"We should" I agree but don't move.

"I slept so good last night" he admits quietly.

"Me too…it's been awhile since I woke feeling this rested" I say.

"Let's get in the shower" He quickly changes the subject, gently lifting me off of him.

I slowly follow him to the bathroom, my legs a little sore from our recent events. We don't talk about the obvious sleeping issue we both have when we're apart; I think it scares us both too much. If we can't sleep apart from each other, what does that mean for us? It is we can only sleep with each other or if there was another person in Christian's bed would he be able to sleep? The thought of another woman in his bed disgusts me, however I can't help but wonder if it's as simple as he can only sleep with me. The fact that I can't sleep without him is confusing to me as well. For Christian the nightmares keep him up at night when I'm away, but with me I just can't sleep and spend most of the night tossing and turning.

"Are you ready to head to the office?" Christian asks as we finish our breakfast that Gail prepared.

"Yes, I just need to grab my phone from the bedroom" I answer.

The ride to GEH is as quiet as the shower and breakfast have been. We walk into the lobby hand in hand and all eyes immediately fall upon us. Christian clears his throat and everyone quickly diverts their eyes, desperately trying to not look at us. I realize that so few people in his office have seen us together that this must come as a surprise to them. He quickly kisses me on the cheek before going to Taylor to the only elevator that can reach the executive floor as I take the other elevator to my floor.

The day passes by quickly as most of it is spent seeing that everything is unpacked and functional so our business can continue with minimal interruptions. After lunch I drive to Seattle E books to meet with the owners, assuring them that nothing has changed with our arrangement now that SIP has moved. We discuss their current space and the possibility of needing more room, but I leave the decision of possibly moving to GEH up to them as they want to think about it. I meet with the landlord of the former SIP building, providing him with a check to cover the remainder of our lease which thankfully was only four months since we broke our lease early. It's after seven by the time I finally get back to Escala, entering my apartment for the first time in two days. Once again the emptiness greets me the moment I walk in and I can't help but think of Christian who is likely upstairs right now. He didn't contact me all day; I don't know if it's because he was busy or because he is as confused as I am about our sleeping issues. When we parted this morning we didn't discuss what our sleeping arrangements for tonight would be therefore I assume we are sleeping separate again.

After another night of tossing and turning, I wake early and make my way to SIP's new home arriving before any of my staff and begin to catch up on some of the work I've been behind in since our move. I quickly lose myself in several manuscripts and before I know it the day is gone. Making my way back to my empty apartment at Escala I realize I still haven't heard from Christian. I don't know what to think about his sudden coldness and distance since we left Escala yesterday morning. I can't help but wonder how he slept last night as I fight to stay awake reading a very boring science fiction manuscript. I find myself struggling to keep my eyes open, to focus on the words before me and end up having to put away the manuscript to try to read it again at a later time.

The next two days pass by very slowly; the nights are filled with restlessness as I can't seem to get comfortable. I've taken pillows from the guest room to lay next to me in bed, hoping that it would feel like Christian but of course it doesn't. Last night I tried sleeping in the guest room because the sheets still slightly smell like Christian from the night he slept in there before we went to Taiwan. Christian still hasn't contacted me but in his defense I haven't contacted him either. I've wanted to call or text him but I don't know what to say. I miss him terribly; not just sleeping with him but hearing his voice, having dinner with him, talking about our days after work and of course his touch. The fact that neither of us can sleep without the other one is the one thing that continues to haunt my thoughts. I struggle trying to figure out what that means for us…does that mean we need to live together again? If so, would I give up my apartment? Does Christian even want to live with me? If he isn't contacting me does that mean he just wants to go back to our original arrangement of only seeing each other on the weekends? If not, then why haven't I heard from him?

After a couple of hours of lying in bed without finding sleep I decide it's time to get answers and address the issue head on. I quickly throw on a pair of sweatpants, send a text to Taylor to let him know that I'm coming up so I don't startle him like last time and head up to Christian's penthouse. It's almost two in the morning but at this point I'm sure neither of us are sound asleep; at least I assume Christian is still having problems sleeping but I suppose if he isn't I will at least get that answer tonight as well. The moment the elevator doors open I hear screaming coming from upstairs and immediately race up the stairs where Taylor greets me and guides me away from Christian's bedroom.

"Is he okay?" I ask hearing him scream louder than I ever have.

"Yes ma'am, it's a just a nightmare" he answers.

"How long has he been like this?" I ask.

"Almost an hour" he admits glancing at his watch.

"This bad?" I'm shocked, he has never been like this when I've slept here.

"Yes ma'am" Taylor answers sadly.

"I'm going to go in" I start walking towards Christian's room.

"Be careful ma'am, he can get….startled easily when he is like this" Taylor warns but doesn't stop me.

"Thanks Taylor" I take a deep breath and open the door.

Christian is lying in the middle of his bed; the blankets have long been thrown off the bed onto a pile on the floor. He is thrashing about with such force that I'm afraid he is going to hurt himself. His body is covered in sweat, his hands clenched in fists, his face is bright red and his voice sounds horse from all the screaming. I'm taken back at this site; I've never seen him in such a bad nightmare but I remember Christian telling me that they would last a long time before I started sleeping with him. I slowly approach his bed, calling his name but I know it's no use as he won't hear me. I try to decide the best way to handle the situation; I know I need to get close to him but for the first time I realize it's very likely that I could get hurt by doing so. He already told me that he gave Taylor a black eye once when he tried to wake him so I know it's possible. But I can't leave him like this, trapped in a nightmare where he is reliving the abuse. As he lets out another blood curdling scream, I decide to just do it and deal with any consequences later. I quickly strip out of my clothes and slowly ease myself onto the bed desperately trying not to startle him. I lay next to him, trying to get closer but his body is thrashing around so much that I can't seem to get close enough. It's almost as if he continues to try to push me away but he rarely makes contact with me and nothing that is forceful when he does. Taking a deep breath I recall what worked the one time he had a really bad nightmare which ultimately led to us admitting we loved each other. I'm hesitant and nervous though because this nightmare seems so much worse than that one did but I know I need to do something. I slowly climb on top of his waist, straddling his hips and gently hold down his arms while leaning over him so I can whisper in his hear.

"Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…Christian it's okay….they can't hurt you anymore" I repeat so many times into his ear.

I try to keep my chest off of his, but it's not possible when I whisper into his ear so I try to minimize how long I'm in that position. I lean up and gently kiss him on the lips, almost immediately I feel his arms start to relax and I let go of his wrists. He asked me not to restrain him but said that when I hold his wrists it doesn't bother him so hopefully this won't bother him. His breathing is still heavy and I can feel his heart racing against my chest whenever I lean close to him. After several minutes his body seems to relax slightly and he stops thrashing around as his arms wrap around my back holding me tight against his chest. Glancing up, I find his eyes are tightly closed so I'm not sure if he is actually awake right now or if he is sleeping. He doesn't seem to be having a nightmare any longer; I let my body slowly relax as well thankful that not only is he free from the nightmare but that he didn't lash out at me when I tried to comfort him. I rest my head against his chest and slowly let my eyes close, falling asleep quickly listening to his now slow heartbeat.

"Ana? What….how….." Christian's voice wakes me the next morning from a sound sleep.

"Hi" I look up shyly at him, we are still in the same position we were when we fell asleep last night with me lying across his chest.

"You're here" Christian's hands run up and down my back as if to prove that what he is seeing is true.

"Yes" I admit.

"Why? How?" he asks.

"I couldn't sleep last night and I needed to talk to you about it. I didn't think you would be sleeping so I took a chance and came up here. You were having a really bad nightmare; Christian I've never seen you like you were last night. Taylor said you were like that for over an hour-" I explain.

"You talked to Taylor?" Christian asks.

"He met me when I came up the elevator" I answered.

"I guess it must have been pretty loud; he typically doesn't come out of his apartment for my nightmares" Christian says, however I think there are times Taylor is outside his room that he doesn't know about.

"I didn't know what to do; lying next to you didn't seem to help because I couldn't get close enough. But when I laid like this…you seemed to calm down almost immediately" I say.

"I could have hurt you" He replies sadly a few minutes later.

"I know but I couldn't leave you like that" I say.

"I never want to hurt you" he pulls me closer to him.

"We need to start sleeping together every night" I announce after several minutes of silence.

"What? But….How…" he stutters.

"Christian" I sigh. "Neither of us are sleeping well without the other one next to us. When was the last time you slept through the night?"

"Monday" he admits.

"It's the same for me" I say. "We can't continue like this; not when we both could be sleeping if we just shared a bed."

"I know" he sighs heavily.

"Why haven't you called or texted me since then?" I ask.

"I wanted to see if it was just a fluke that I didn't have any nightmares that night" he answers.

"Was it?" I ask cautiously wondering if maybe today was just a random nightmare.

"No" he takes a deep breath. "I've had them every night since."

"But I don't understand….then why didn't you call me?" I lean up so I can see him.

"I didn't understand what it meant…I don't know how to explain it but I was really confused. Hell I still am!" he exclaims, his body tensing below me.

"Why?" I whisper.

"Because…Damn it!" his voice full of frustration. "How is it that lying next to you can make my nightmares go away when years of therapy couldn't? Why can you take them away? Why is it better with you? It doesn't make sense!"

I can feel his body tense below me, his hands are on my shoulders almost as if he is going to move me but we need to have this conversation even if he doesn't want to. I move my hands up, playing gently with his hair willing him not to close me out which I know is what he wants to do right now. There are times when it seems he wants to open up to me or we begin talking about something and then he just shuts me out like on Tuesday morning after we both admitted we slept well next to each other. His grip loosens on my shoulders after a few minutes and he makes no effort to move me from him.

"Christian" I sigh quietly. "It doesn't need to make sense; whatever the reason we both can only sleep soundly with each other. We need to start sleeping together every night."

Christian doesn't say anything for several minutes; I'm concerned I'm pressuring him too much and he is shutting down on me. I don't say anything; I don't move but just give him time to hopefully process everything.

"You're right" he whispers.

I let out the breath I didn't realize I was holding as he wraps his arms around me, holding me tight against his chest.

"I've missed you" he nips at my ear.

"So much" I agree.

"You're naked" he observes, as if he hadn't noticed it before.

"You're not" I point out as I feel his erection begin to stir through his underwear.

"I don't sleep without clothes on unless you're here" he pulls my hips down against his.

"Really?" I ask surprised, I thought that was the reason he insisted on sleeping naked with me.

"I've only slept naked with you" he admits. "From the first night we spent together….I can't imagine sleeping next to you with anything between us now."

"I should get ready for work, I have an early meeting" I look at the clock realizing I forgot to set an alarm last night in all the chaos of seeing Christian in his nightmare.

"Do you have to?" Christian gently pulls my hips against his hardening erection.

"I do" I moan. "I have to be at the office in twenty minutes and I'm not even dressed."

"Tonight" he says, eyes full of lust and desire.

"Yes" I moan as he kisses me deeply.

"Go get ready before you're late" he smacks my ass.

I take probably the world's fastest shower before grabbing an outfit from Christian's closet, suddenly thankful that I didn't move all the clothes Christian bought me back to my apartment yet. Gail prepared us a quick egg sandwich that we eat in the car while Taylor drives us to work. Entering GEH hand in hand again, we quickly go our separate ways to start our day. Settling in my office, I think of everything that happened last night and this morning. We still have to figure out the details, like where we sleep each night and if Christian will keep clothes at my place for when he spends the night, but I'm pleased that Christian agreed that we need to start sleeping together every night. There's going to be times when we are traveling for work when it's not possible, but at least for now we both should start sleeping better at night. It was also reassuring to know that I wasn't the only one confused and questioning why we slept better with the other person. I wish we would have talked about it sooner so that Christian didn't have to deal with those horrible nightmares every night.

The day progresses slowly, I'm still very tired from all the nights of tossing and turning this week but I'm comforted in knowing that next week should be better since we will be sleeping together at night. Thankfully today is Friday; I'm hoping to catch up on sleep this weekend and looking forward to not getting up early or having early morning conference calls which have filled my schedule this week. I decide to have Stacy order lunch for me and Christian, hoping Andrea can squeeze me into his schedule at some point so we can have lunch together but if not I will leave it with her so he can at eat whenever his schedule allows.

"Mr. Grey's office" Andrea answers just as Stacy places our lunch order.

"Hi Andrea it's Anastasia Steele from SIP" I introduce.

"Ms. Steele, would you like me to transfer you to Mr. Grey?" Andrea asks.

"No…I was hoping to surprise him with lunch today and thought maybe you could tell me if he has any time in his schedule to spare" I explain.

"Oh sure, let me see" she pauses and I hear her clicking the keyboard checking his schedule. "He is free in about thirty minutes for an hour or so."

"Perfect! Please don't tell him about my call, I would like to surprise him" I request.

"Of course, I will put something in his schedule so he doesn't book the time for someone else" she ends the call.

I start rereading the science fiction manuscript from earlier this week while waiting for lunch and discover it's just as boring when I'm more awake as it was when I was falling asleep over it the other day. I chuckle and send an email letting the editors know that we will not be publishing this manuscript yet and that there is a significant amount of work that still needs to be done. A few minutes later Stacy informs me that the lunch I ordered has been delivered; I collect it and take the elevator to Christian's executive floor where Andrea tells me to go ahead into Christian's office.

"WHAT?!" Christian snaps as I knock on the door.

I give Andrea a look but she just ushers me in, oblivious to Christian's tone.

"I said no-" he yells when I open the door.

"I brought you lunch….sir" I close the door behind me before adding the last part.

Christian's eyes go from anger, to surprise to lust all in a matter of seconds. Just as quick he crosses the room, crushing his lips against mine as my back presses against the door. His hands are all over my body, pulling me closer to him, wrapping my leg around his waist as his tongue seeks entry into my mouth. I quickly drop the bag of subs on the floor, wrapping my arms around his neck, tugging at his hair as our tongues dance.

"Hi" I say breathless as Christian pulls away briefly.

"What are you doing here?" he asks.

"I brought you lunch" I answer.

"I have a call that will be starting any minute, I wish I could have lunch with you" he says disappointed.

"No you don't" I smile.

"It's on my schedule" he says confused.

"I asked Andrea to reserve the time for me, she was going to put something in your schedule so you didn't schedule something else" I explain.

"So you and my assistant are teaming up against me now?" he says sternly but with a smile.

"Yes….sir" I smirk.

"Lock the door" he commands, his voice deep and his shoulders straight back in dom mode.

"Yes sir" I reply quickly.

"Did I tell you to speak?" he smacks my ass as I turn around to lock the door.

I turn around, my eyes glued to the floor without saying a word. I can feel the excitement growing quickly as my panties become moist with desire. We haven't had a scene since we came back from Taiwan; we've really barely seen each other since then.

"Take off your clothes" he instructs.

I quickly remove my skirt, button down top and undergarments before folding them and placing them on the table. I can feel his eyes roaming my entire body as he walks slowly around me and I feel my breathing beginning to increase in anticipation of what is about to come. Christian's feat stop in front me; I can hear him unbuttoning his pants and watch as they fall to his ankles with his underwear.

"On your knees" he says. "Hands behind your back."

I immediately drop to my knees, clasping my hands behind my back but keep my eyes glued to the floor. He takes a step closer to me, his feat nearly touching my knees as he lifts me chin up gently opening my mouth. He thrusts himself forcefully into me, immediately hitting the back of my throat hard as he holds my head in place. It takes me several seconds for my body to adjust, my throat muscles slowly relaxing as I remember to breathe through my nose. He pulls back slightly before thrusting deep into my mouth again, hitting that spot he loves as I swallow around him. His hands are gripping my head hard, tugging at my hair, guiding me to take him deeper with each thrust.

"This is for me only….for denying me this morning" he grits through his teeth.

I moan in disappointment around him realizing I won't be getting my much needed release anytime soon. He continues to thrust deeply in my throat, instructing me to swallow before pushing himself deeper causing me to gag but he doesn't pull out. My eyes water as I struggle to convince my body to relax but he just repeats this process several times moaning loudly as his fingers dig into my scalp. I groan at the sudden pain/pleasure combination which must push him over the edge because the next thrust into my mouth he comes hard forcing himself even further down my throat as his come pours out. I can feel his dick spasm in my throat as the orgasm doesn't seem to stop; finally his grip on my head lessens but he continues to hold my mouth against him. He begins to soften in my mouth, giving me much needed relief as my body finally relaxes.

"God you are amazing" he moans as he lifts me to my feet.

"You seemed stressed when I came in" I giggle.

"You have no idea" he sighs. "Get dressed; we'll have lunch."

"Yes sir" I smile.


	27. Chapter 27

_Author's Note: Thank you all for your reviews and ongoing support. I'm so glad so many of you are enjoying my stories! If you haven't already checked out Independence, my other story, please do so! _

_Things are heating up for our couple now...in more ways than one!_

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James_.

**Chpt. 27 APOV:**

After having lunch with Christian, we quickly say goodbye and I return to my office as he has an afternoon full of meetings. The remainder of the day passes by quickly; I find myself smiling for no reason several times throughout the day. I'm looking forward to sleeping next to Christian tonight, hoping to finally be able to sleep through the night…I feel like it's been ages since I have had a solid night's sleep.

_I'm going to be working late tonight. Taylor will take you back to Escala when you are ready. Stay with me tonight? –C_

_Okay. I will wait for you at your place –A_

As Christian said, Taylor picks me moments after I text him letting him know I was ready whenever he was. I curl up on the couch in the great room, reading another manuscript as I wait for Christian to come home. A little after seven he texts me to tell me to have dinner without him as it is going to be at least another hour before he can leave the office. Gail makes me a plate of roasted chicken with potatoes and vegetables for dinner even though I insisted I could make something myself. She tells me how to reheat the plate in the fridge for Christian if he is hungry when he gets home before retiring for the evening.

_Upstairs. 10 minutes –C_

My breath hitches at the text; we haven't been to the playroom since before everything happened with Hyde and I find myself aroused at the mere mention of it. I quickly put my manuscript in my bag and make my way to the playroom, unlocking the door and immediately taking in the familiar scents. The room is exactly how I remember it, nothing has been moved. Only a couple minutes have passed but if Christian arrives early I want to be ready. I quickly strip out of my clothes, leaving my thong and underwear, kneeling on the cool hard floor with my eyes down waiting for Christian. What seems like only a couple minutes later I hear the door to the playroom open and close quickly. Christian doesn't say anything, but I can see his bare feet pass by me.

"Stand" he orders.

I immediately comply, my eyes remaining focused on the floor as he walks around me. Without warning a blindfold is placed over my eyes and my breathing immediately hitches. I can tell by Christian's tone in his voice and the tension that is in the air that he must have had a rough day at work and needs a scene to destress. Whatever the reason he needs this, my arousal is ever present as I anticipate what is going to happen next.

"Do you remember your safe words?" He asks.

"Yes sir" I answer.

"Tell me" he requests.

"Yellow and red sir" I answer.

"Remember to use them tonight if you need to" He whispers in my ear before unhooking my bra and removing it. He stands behind me so close that I can feel the heat from his skin against mine; his hands quickly massage my breasts but his movements are not gentle. He pinches my nipples hard, causing me to gasp as my head falls back against his shoulder.

"Ohhhhhhh" I moan as a nipple clamp is attached.

"Shhhhhhh!" he smacks my ass hard as the other clamp is attached.

He turns me around forcefully so I am facing him; I feel him connecting a chain to the clamps, pulling them closer together which is quite uncomfortable. He gently tugs at the chain, the sensation immediately goes to my sex increasing the need for more. Suddenly I feel him pull hard on my underwear, and hear it tear in two. His forcefulness turns me on even more as he pulls away my damp panties tossing them to the floor. I hear him to drop the floor before he pulls my thighs apart as his mouth finds my clit. I gasp in pleasure as he sucks hard on my clit, nipping it with his teeth but my pleasure is short lived as he attaches another clamp this time to my clit. I whimper quietly which earns me another smack on my ass from Christian. He must attach another chain to this clamp because suddenly when he pulls on the chain I can feel it in every clamp. He takes my hands above my head and attaches them to a chain that is lowered from the ceiling. He pulls it tight so I am nearly standing on my tip toes which is not painful but not very comfortable.

I hear him walking around the room as I try not to think about what is to come. I remind myself that his is something he needs right now and as a sub I am here to fulfil his needs. My sex is drenched in anticipation and excitement of what he is going to do; it's been so long since we have had a true scene in here. I think with everything going on neither of us have admitted that we may have missed it. Just as I begin to wonder if we should schedule a time in here Christian's hand comes down hard on my ass. The motion thrusts me forward, my hands grip the chain above my head that I'm hanging from as I struggle to stand upright. He does this two more times before switching to the cat tails which sting as they come down hard on my ass. My skin feels like it's on fire every time he hits me increasing my desire even more. With every hit, I'm trusted forward and the chains are pulled in both pain and pleasure; it takes every ounce of power I have to not moan as the feeling goes straight to my sex.

Without warning I hear the cat tails fall to the floor; I sense Christian in front of me before I hear his heavy breathing. He grabs my ass with both hands, lifting me up against him before pushing me down harshly on his erection. He removes the clamp on my very swollen and over sensitive clit just as he fully enters me. My legs wrap around his waist on reflex as this is the only way I can hold on to him with my arms still attached to the chain above my head. Christian's fingers dig into my ass hard as he moves me up and down on him. He can't pull all the way out in the position; his movements are harsh and purposeful, I can feel his frustration every time he slams me down on his dick. I don't recall Christian ever being like this in here but I have to admit it is very arousing.

"Come Ana!" Christian commands just when I think I can't wait any longer.

Hearing his voice pushes me over the edge that I've been on for so long; I can feel the orgasm throughout my entire body as I lose all sense of reality. Finally coming down from my orgasm, I can feel Christian's fingers digging deeper into my ass as he continues to slam me down on him only now much faster and harder as he gets closer to his own release. I can tell that I'm going to be bruised tomorrow given how hard Christian is holding on to my ass, but I'm so turned on my his forcefulness that I don't care.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Christian moans as he finds his release deep inside of me.

He gently moves me against him, riding out his orgasm before unhooking my arms from above my head. He carries me to the bed without breaking our connection until he lays me on the bed, moving my body to the center of the bed as if I were a rag doll. Without warning his lips crush against mine; I gasp in surprise which gives him the chance to thrust his tongue into my mouth. Just as quick he pulls away from me, moving my arms above my head and I feel him crawl up my body moving my arms to they are once again above my head. He pulls open my mouth before thrusting his still soft, juice coated dick into my mouth. I run my tongue around his quickly hardening erection, tasting both of our juices that coat him. He pushes himself further into my mouth as I feel him moving my arms around above me; I try to figure out what he is doing but as he hits the back of my throat and I nearly gag I decide to instead focus on him in my mouth. I can't help but be surprised at how quick he is ready for round two, although I should know by now that this man is always ready to go for another round.

He pulls himself from my mouth before moving to the end of the bed where he pulls my legs up high, attaching them far and wide above my head. My ass and lower back off are off the bed, as my body is sort of bent in half in this position. I blush deeply realizing how this must look to Christian; my sex and ass are on full display for him. He sits between my legs, his hands gently roaming my body in direct contrast to his aggression a short time ago. He gently pulls on the chain attached to my nipple clamps, causing juices to flow from my sex once again. My body quickly responds to his touch; the excitement only builds the more he touches me. His fingers run between my drenched folds, teasing my opening before barely touching my clit. I'm so focused on his actions and my needs that I don't notice what he's doing until I feel him thrust a plug suddenly into my ass.

"Hmmmmmmmm" I whimper as I try to force my body to relax around this foreign object.

"Your ass looks so beautiful with a plug in it" he says as I feel him sit back on the bed and can tell his eyes are on me. "I can tell how much you like it; you're so wet right now."

His mouth is on my sex as if to prove a point, lapping at my juices as I feel them dripping from me. He gently moves the plug in me just as he thrusts his tongue into my throbbing sex. I nearly combust right there but force myself to hold off knowing he has not yet given me permission to come. My body is on edge, my hands are in fists as I desperately try to push my hips against him needing to feel him deeper but in this position I can't move very much.

"Did you miss coming in here Ana?" he asks.

"Yes sir" I pant.

"Are you enjoying tonight?" he asks.

"Yes sir!" I moan as he pinches my clit.

"Do you need to come?" he asks.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" I scream as he plunges in me hard and deep.

"I didn't hear you" He smirks.

"Please sir….Oh God….Please" I beg as he continues fucking me hard and deep.

"Come when you can" He orders.

His pace doesn't let up, the aggression and forcefulness from before returns but this time with the plug still inside of me it's intensified greatly. Every time he enters me he rubs against my g spot, making me climb higher and higher until I once again find myself on the edge. This pace continues for some time, I can't help but moan every time he hits that wonderful spot deep inside of me. I feel so full right now; I can't focus on anything other than his thrusts into me.

"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream as he releases the nipple clamps which send me over the edge.

I come hard around him, but he doesn't stop, he doesn't slow down his pace on me. He continues thrusting hard and deep into my sex, my walls desperately trying to clench around him. The orgasm seems to last forever before he finally slows down and let's my body have some relief. While still inside of me he leans down and takes a very sensitive nipple into his mouth sucking it gently. I moan in response to the sensations; the plug in my ass, him deep inside of me, the pressure on my clit in this new position and now him sucking on my sensitive nipple…it's all too much.

Without breaking our connection, he unhooks my ankles from whatever they are attached to above my head and gently puts them back on the bed. He thrusts gently into me several times before slowly pulling out.

"Turn over, put your beautiful ass in the air" he instructs as he leaves the bed.

I blush but immediately comply with his request. With my arms still cuffed to the bed this is not an easy task, but I manage to roll over and tuck my knees below me so my ass is in the air. My still sensitive nipples rub against the cool satin sheets every time I move, increasing my desire even more. I hear him moving around the room, opening and shutting drawers while I lay in here waiting for him. After several minutes he finally returns to the end of the bed, behind me, but he doesn't touch me for several minutes. I can feel the desire once again inside of me, shocked that my body is able to respond just knowing that he is looking at me despite the two orgasms moments ago.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh" I scream as he thrusts into me without warning.

"You're so wet…so tight" he moans as he leans across my back pushing both himself and the plug deeper into me.

"Hmmmmmm" I moan as he thrusts deeply into me.

"Do you like that?" He moves the plug around inside of me as he mimics the same movements with his dick.

"Hmmmmm" I moan overwhelmed with the sensations.

"Tell me" He says firmly.

"Yes sir" I pant.

"You like when I play with your ass don't you?" he asks.

"Yes sir!" I exclaim as he thrusts the plug deeper into me.

He continues to thrust deeply into me before sitting further back, grasping my hips harshly and fucking me hard again. I can feel his frustration from the day coming out in his thrusts and as his fingers grip into my hips tightly. I'm once again on the edge, his forcefulness and need fueling my desire. He pulls out nearly completely before slamming hard and deep back into me.

"You're so fucking wet….God you're dripping" he moans.

"Please…" I beg.

"Come Ana!" He says a few minutes later as he pulls the plug suddenly from my ass.

"CHRISTIAN!" I scream as the orgasm takes over.

I swear I see stars; I can feel the orgasm throughout my entire body as Christian continues to plunge into me prolonging my orgasm even longer. My body practically goes limp as I come down from the orgasm, if my knees weren't under me I swear I would be lying flat on the bed by now. I struggle to catch my breath as my body stays on the edge, not fully coming down from the orgasm.

"Owww" I moan as Christian slides partially into my ass; I hadn't even noticed he pulls out of my still throbbing sex.

"So tight…." He moans as his hands grip my hips even tighter.

"Hmmmmmm" I whimper as he pushes further into me.

My ass is stretching to accommodate him but I feel like I'm being torn in two. The pain versus pleasure scale is starting to favor more pain than pleasure right now. I desperately try to relax my body, knowing that this was enjoyable last time but I find this to be more of a struggle this time.

"You feel so good like this" he moans.

"Owwwwwwwwwwww!" I scream moments later when he pushes himself completely into me. I struggle below him, trying to move away as the pain almost becomes too much to bear. With my hands secured above my head there is little I can do to move from him I realize.

"Relax….push back baby" he instructs.

"No….please…." I beg.

"Shhhhhh….just relax" he whispers into my ear as he leans over my back.

I bite my tongue knowing that if I respond right now he won't like what I have to say. I'd love to see him try to relax with a dick stuck up his ass, I think. His hands reach under me, pinching my nipples gently trying to help my body relax. I try to think of anything else than where he is right now and slowly I feel my body start to relax. His hand works its way below me to my sex his fingers running through my still wet folds as he gently rubs my clit.

"You're so wet….See how your body responds to me?" he rubs his fingers through my folds again, to my opening where I can feel the evidence of my arousal on his fingers.

"Hmmmmmm" I whimper as he pushes even further inside of me, his balls slapping against my sex.

"You feel so amazing….so tight, so hot...so perfect" he moans slightly pulling out before pushing back in.

I feel my body defying me as I become more aroused when he starts to move within me. His fingers continue at my clit and my nipples, pushing me further towards the edge. His movements are slow and shallow, but just enough to keep me right there and not push me over the edge. The pain is gone, replaced now with desire, need and want. Once he feels my body relax into him even more, he sits back up, his hands gripping my ass tightly.

"You look so….hot like this…..Oh God….it's so hot watching me fuck you like this" He moans above me as he starts pulling out further before slowly pushing himself back into my tight ass.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh" I moan as he increases the pace slightly.

"Tell me….you like it…like this" he says between breaths, clearly struggling to hold off his orgasm.

"Yes! You feel so good like this…" I moan only blushing slightly as I admit I'm enjoying this.

"I can't wait to feel you come again" he grips my hips tighter moments later.

"Christian….I don't know if I can….it's too much…." I admit in a shaky voice.

"Baby…your body is ready….I can feel your juices on me when I do this" he thrusts into me deeply, his balls firm against my sex. "Your pussy is throbbing, begging for a release."

"Noooooooooooo" I moan, realizing he is right...

"You're going to let me feel you come when I fuck your ass, aren't you baby?" He asks thrusting faster into.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh" I scream out with the new pace.

He continues his pace, pulling out to what feels like half way before thrusting himself hard back into me. Each time he does this, his balls slap my sex, the sound and feeling increasing my desire even more. Within minutes of him changing the pace in which he is fucking me, my body is on fire with desire once again begging for its release. I'm shocked that only moments ago I was desperately trying to get away from him and now I find myself pushing back against him whenever he pulls back. Our breathing is heavy, we are both moaning loudly as the need clearly builds in both of us.

"Christian….Please….sir…." I beg.

"What do you need?" he asks, stopping his thrusts once he is deeply in me again.

"I need to come sir….please….I'm so close" I moan, pushing back against him again desperately trying to get him to move.

"How should I make you come?" his fingers dig into my hips, holding me tight against him.

"Please….sir…." I beg not wanting to say the words.

"Tell me" he instructs firmly.

"Fuck me sir….please fuck me…" I beg moments later.

"Where?" he asks.

Oh God….he wants to hear me say it.

"Christian…sir….please….fuck me" I moan as he slowly moves within me.

"Tell me where to fuck you" He commands.

"There…please sir…right there" the pace continues to be slow with shallow thrusts as I climb even higher.

"Tell me" he orders.

"Fuck my ass sir! Please fuck my ass!" I scream as desire overrides any embarrassment I may feel.

"As you wish….come when you can" He immediately pulls out and thrusts hard and deep back into me.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Don't stop…right there…..don't stop!" I scream as he finally starts moving at a pace that I know will have me over the edge in moments.

"I can feel you trembling around me…you're squeezing me so tight…" he moan as he continues to thrust into me hard.

"I'm so close…don't stop" I beg.

"Come Ana!" He screams as he pulls nearly completely out, leaving only his tip inside of me before pushing slowly back in.

"OH God! AGAIN! Don't STOP!" I scream, the feeling of him doing that pushes me right to the edge.

"CHRISTIAN!" I scream as the orgasm takes over once again.

He doesn't stop, doesn't slow down as I feel the orgasm continue and continue as if it's never going to end. I'm slightly stunned at the fact that I just had an intense orgasm from anal sex alone as I feel Christian's hands grip even tighter on my ass. I don't know if it's because my body was so wound up already but that was one of the biggest orgasms I have ever had and it's still not ending.

"Ahhhhh….Owwwwwwww" I moan as I feel myself being forced to stretch even further around him as he swells.

"That's it baby….Oh God….Even tighter….so hot….." he moans. "ANA!"

Seconds later when I don't know that I could handle much more at this increased size, I feel him find his release. He pushes himself even further inside of me causing me to moan in a mix of pleasure and pain as I feel him even deeper than ever before. He holds me tight against him as he continues to spasm inside of me; the warmness from his release is felt throughout my body as he lays on top of me wrapping his arms around my chest after removing the blindfold. He leans above me, undoing my wrists before moving us so we are lying down, my back to his front our connection still intact.

"Wow…" I say breathless.

"That was….there are no words" he whispers, his arm wrapping around my waist holding me close to him.

"You were quite….different tonight" I say a few minutes later as we lay in our post orgasm bliss.

"It was a stressful day" he admits. "I'm sorry if I took it out on you…I just felt so out of control."

"Are you kidding?" I ask shocked that he was apologizing. "I enjoyed it."

"Really?" he asks surprised.

"It was so hot when you were…" I struggle with the words.

"When I was what?" he prompts but I feel him smile against my neck.

"When you were fucking me hard like that" I blush at the words.

"I didn't hurt you?" he asks.

"No….well not really…" I admit.

"When did I hurt you?" his voice full of concern.

"When….oh God do I have to say it?" I blush deeply.

"Tell me Ana…I need to know" he requests firmly.

"UGH!" I sigh. "Okay" (pause) "When you entered me….there….it hurt at first."

"Oh" he says. "But you liked it once you relaxed right?"

"Yes" I whisper.

"We need to stop talking about me fucking you" he says and immediately I feel his dick twitch in my ass.

"I don't think I could go again anyway" I moan in exhaustion.

"Oh trust me, if I had enough of energy right now I would prove to you just how wrong you are" he says gently moving back and forth inside of me.

"Let's go to bed" I suggest a few minutes later as I realize I'm slowly falling asleep in here.

"I could sleep right there, just like this" he moans, pulling me closer to him which is when I realize he is still inside of me.

"Bed Christian" I smile.

He slowly pulls out of me and immediately I feel empty again, my body missing him which shocks me. He goes to the bathroom and comes back with a wet washcloth; I blush as he cleans me thoroughly from our very long scene. Glancing at the clock on the wall I realize we have been in here for over three hours which is the longest we have been had a scene last. He wraps the robe around me before carrying me to his bedroom where we finish getting ready for bed. As I walk to the bathroom, I realize just how many of my muscles are truly sore after tonight's activities.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Christian asks as I snuggle next to him, our bodies wrapped around each other.

"Yes why?" I ask.

"I know I was quite rough" he replies.

"Christian, I enjoyed it…I swear" I assure him.

We fall asleep wrapped in each other's arms for the first time in several days we both sleep soundly through the night. Christian doesn't have any nightmares and neither of us wake until the sun is high in the sky the next day. Looking at the clock I realize we both were clearly more tired than we thought as it is after noon and we are still in bed.

"Morning" Christian moans next to me.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you" I roll over so I'm facing him.

"What time is it?" he asks.

"Twelve fifteen" I answer.

"You're kidding! I've never slept this late…ever" he smiles.

"I think we were both exhausted from not sleeping well for so many nights" I say. "How did you sleep?"

"Soundly" he admits.

"Me too" I agree.

"I still wish I knew why, but sleeping next to you keeps the nightmares away" he sighs.

"I can't sleep without you either Christian" I kiss him. "It works so we just need to go with it."

"I'm not very good at just going with things" he admits. "My world is very organized, structured and controlled."

"And now this is as well…we will sleep like this every night" I say simply.

The weekend passes by quickly, we both sleep soundly each night and we spend the entire weekend together. Since I have clothes still in his closet I have no need to return to my apartment but I can't help but wonder how long it is before I will go back into my apartment. It's much more convenient for us to stay at Christian's apartment; not just because Taylor and Gail are there which is very nice but also because Christian has a full office set up here so he can work at any time. I don't think he would be able to get very much work done at my apartment if we were there and something important came up.

"Sir, ma'am" Taylor comes into the great room Sunday night as we are relaxing against each other.

"Hi Taylor" I greet him.

"Taylor" Christian acknowledges.

"We have been informed that Elizabeth Morgan has been granted bail" Taylor says.

"WHAT?!" Christian screams.

"How?" I ask.

"I don't know sir" Taylor admits.

"Dad….it's Christian" Christian quickly calls his dad as Taylor leaves the room.

"Christian…I was just going to call you" Carrick says; Christian has the phone on speaker so I can hear it.

"Taylor just informed us that Elizabeth was granted bail…how is this possible?" he screams.

"They set bail very high and required she surrender her passport but they felt she was not a flight risk" he explains.

"Did they forget that she tried to kill Ana?" Christian says angrily.

"I know son" Carrick replies. "However, she is innocent until proven guilty."

"Innocent my ass" Christian mumbles.

"Is there a date set for the trial?" I ask.

"Not yet….I expect it will be a couple of months yet" Carrick answers.

"Keep us informed of any updates" Christian says.

"I will" Carrick promises.

"Thank you Carrick" I say.

"Christian, please come see your mother soon. She would love for you both to come to dinner one night" Carrick suggests.

"We will Dad" Christian hangs up.

"Taylor!" Christian calls.

"Yes sir?" Taylor quickly appears seconds later.

"I want someone on Elizabeth Morgan twenty-four/seven…I don't care the cost. Hire two people if need be just have someone watching her at all times. I want daily reports on her activities" Christian instructs.

"Yes sir, I have a team ready to follow her. They have been vetted by Welsh and both signed NDAs moments ago. One should be her to apartment within the next ten minutes" Taylor explains.

"Thank you Taylor" I say quietly, genuinely surprised at what this man is capable of.

"We need someone for Ana" Christian says.

"Sawyer has been medically cleared-" Taylor replies.

"Does he feel up to it?" Christian interrupts.

"Yes sir, he is eager to get back to work" Taylor answers.

"What do you think?" Christian asks.

"I think he is the best person to assign to Ms. Steele. He knows her so well already, they communicated very well together when he was assigned to her before" Taylor explains.

"Agreed" Christian says.

"I will arrange for him to be here tomorrow morning" Taylor leaves.

"I can't believe they let her out after what she did" I say angrily.

"I won't let her near you baby" Christian vows.

"I know….I just wish we could get away from all this drama" I sigh.

"We could go away somewhere if you want" he suggests.

"No, we just got back from Taiwan last week, I can't leave the office again" I say sadly.

"How about next weekend we go out on the boat?" he asks.

"You have a boat?" I ask.

"Of course" he smiles proudly. "We could take the boat out and dock it somewhere for the night."

"Really?" the thought of it sounds so relaxing.

"Absolutely…I will arrange for us to leave either Friday after work or Saturday morning. We just need to check our schedules" Christian says.

"That sounds perfect" I sigh.

"Thank you for not fighting me on Sawyer" Christian says quietly a few minutes later.

"I don't think Elizabeth will try anything but I agree that I don't want to chance it" I reply.

"I'm happy you're here with me" He hugs me tight against him.

"Let's go to bed" I suggest a few hours later. "I have an early morning meeting tomorrow."

"Sawyer can take you in and will stay at GEH all day. No one should get to your floor without an ID badge but if something comes up Sawyer will be with Taylor all day" He explains.

"I know" I assure him. "It'll be fine."


	28. Chapter 28

_Author's Note: Hopefully the site cooperates this time and you all are able to read this chapter!_

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 28 APOV:**

The next couple of days pass by quickly with no threats or unusual guests. Although I don't like the reason, it's been nice having Sawyer around again. Before he was shot, Sawyer had become a daily part of my life and I didn't realize how much I missed him until he started back with me on Monday. Some mornings Christian and I have been going into the office together while other mornings we go in separate because our schedules are not always the same. Like this morning I am on my way to Seattle E Books for a meeting, so Sawyer is driving me while Taylor accompanies Christian to GEH. I spend most of the day at Seattle E Books, learning more about their processes and publication strategies following a meeting with the owners. Mr. and Mrs. Snyder have decided they want to start having fewer responsibilities with the company over the next year or two but they wanted to begin that discussion with me now. I knew this conversation would eventually come as this was likely the reason that they were looking to sell in the first place. Following this announcement I rearranged my schedule and spent the rest of the day onsite here learning more about the way they run their day to day operations. We decide that when their lease is up in about six months we will look to move Seattle E Books to the same location as SIP which will allow for the transition of responsibilities to occur more freely. I am pleased that they have agreed to move as this will make it much easier to oversee both companies once Mr. and Mrs. Snyder move to part time employment.

"Sawyer, I'd like to stop by my apartment and pick up a few things before we go to Christian's" I say on the way back to Escala.

"The apartment hasn't been checked and cleared ma'am" Sawyer replies.

"It's Ana…I will wait in the hall and you can check it" I suggest.

"I'd rather check with Taylor" he says.

"Fine" I sigh.

I hear him on the phone with Taylor minutes later and I can tell from his voice that Taylor is not in favor of the idea. I don't see what the big deal is; Taylor has Elizabeth under constant surveillance so he would know if she were at Escala recently. I'm getting angrier and angrier by the moment; what's the point in having an apartment if I'm not able to go there to pick up a few things? Gail pours me a glass of wine as I sit sulking in the great room until Christian arrives.

"We need to talk" I say as soon as he walks into the room.

"What's wrong?" Christian asks quickly.

"Apparently I'm no longer allowed in my own apartment?" I ask.

"Oh that…." He sighs.

"Yeah that!" I exclaim. "What is the point in having my apartment downstairs if I can't even go down there to pick up a few things?"

"Sawyer and Taylor just wanted to make sure the place was secure before you went in Ana. They just want to keep you safe" he says.

"So as long as Elizabeth is out I'm not allowed in my apartment?" I ask angrily.

"Well….I….it's not safe" he stutters.

"You have her under constant watch but it's not safe for me to get a few items from my apartment? Did you just assume I was staying here again until the court hearing?" I ask.

"You can't go back there! It's not safe!" his voice raises to match mine.

"So once again my life is on hold because of her?" I ask.

"Let Sawyer and Taylor check the apartment and then you can get whatever you need" Christian begs.

"What's the point? I should just move my stuff in here since I can't go back to my apartment without security first clearing it! It's a waste!" I exclaim.

"You're right" Christian takes a deep breath.

"Right about what?" I ask confused.

"You should move your stuff in here" he answers.

"What? Why? So when this is all over I just move it back? And what happens if another threat comes? I pack up and move back?" I yell.

"No, move in with me damn it!" he counters.

"What are you saying?" I ask quietly.

"I want you to move in with me" he comes closer so we are standing face to face.

"Permanently?" I whisper.

"Yes" he smiles. "We can't sleep without one another; I hated coming home from work when you weren't here, I missed seeing you every day."

"I missed you too. My apartment felt so empty" I admit.

"Move in with me" he says.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" I ask giving him another chance to change his mind.

"Do you want to?" he asks.

"Yes" I whisper.

"So you will move in with me?" he asks again.

"Yes" I smile before hugging him tightly.

"You don't know how happy you just made me" He nips at my ear, lifting me off the floor as he holds me tight against him.

"Oh I think I can tell just how happy I made you" I say grinding myself against his erection.

"I think dinner is going to wait" He grabs my hand, nearly pulling me a he heads for the stairs.

"You're really going to move in here?" he asks shutting the bedroom door behind us.

"Yes" I smile.

Seconds later his lips crush against mine, his hips pinning me against the wall as his hands roam my body. I grasp his firm ass, pulling him into me, his erection rubbing against my clit as his tongue dances with mine. Our actions are that of desperation, want and need as we tear off each other's clothes. We were both so frustrated only moments ago; the frustration still in our movements as we grip each other forcefully. Christian grabs my ass hard, lifting me off the ground as his mouth sucks hard on my nipple.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" I scream as he pulls me down on his erection forcefully.

"You drive me so crazy" he moans into my mouth, thrusting himself deep inside of me.

My back is against the wall, my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist holding on tightly. He grips my ass firm as he thrusts in and out of me hard and fast; the need quickly rising in both of us. His lips crush hard against mine, his tongue thrusting into my mouth as he increases the pace. I bury my face in his neck, struggling to breath as I climb higher knowing that I won't last much longer. I suck and bite his earlobe while gently tugging on his hair which must push him over the edge because he starts fucking me much harder and deeper.

"Come with me Ana" he pants.

"Yes baby" I moan.

Seconds later, he swells inside of me and I come just as I feel him find his release deep inside of me. I blush realizing we never made it further than the bedroom wall as Christian sets me on the floor slowly slipping out of me.

"Wow…that was hot" he says.

"Yeah" I say still breathless. "We never even made it to the bed."

"How about some dinner and then we try to find the bed again?" he smirks.

"Oh that sounds like a plan" I giggle.

The next day after work Christian, Taylor and Sawyer are all in my apartment as I pack my stuff to officially move in with Christian. I tried telling them that I don't need all of them here but they insisted it was necessary; I gave up and didn't argue. I realize other than clothes, some of my favorite books and some photo albums there really isn't much I need to pack. Christian and I haven't discussed it yet, but I don't plan on selling my apartment just yet. Not that I don't think things won't work out between us but I want to be sure before I put it on the market. In the meantime, I don't mind if it sits empty. I purchased the apartment in cash therefore the expenses I have associated with the apartment are minimal.

"My parents would like us to come to dinner tomorrow night if you are free" Christian asks over dinner.

"I have a meeting until four but nothing after that" I check my schedule.

"Great, I'll let my mom know we can be there around five; we will leave from GEH" he says.

"Are we still going on the boat this weekend?" I ask.

"Yes, we will leave Friday after work and return late on Sunday. I know a few places that we can anchor for the night where we will be completely alone" he smirks.

"I'm looking forward to getting away" I sigh.

"Stressful week?" he asks.

"Just busy" I say.

"We will be stress free on the boat" he smiles.

"Who will be going with us?" I ask.

"No one" he answers.

"What about security?" I ask nervously.

"They will be tracking our boat from land and can take off to get to us in minutes but I don't see a need for them to be on the boat with us" he explains.

"Are you sure?" I ask.

"Yes, Taylor knows our course very well and has identified several areas that he could launch from should a problem arise" he says.

"Sounds wonderful" I sigh.

"It will be" he promises.

We sleep that night as we have every night this week; naked, wrapped in each other's arms and without interruptions. Christian hasn't had any nightmares since our decision to start sleeping together again and I have been sleeping peacefully as well. We both wake up the next morning feeling well rested, we have breakfast together and then set off for GEH. This has become our pattern this week and I have to admit it feels absolutely wonderful. Dinner with Christian's parents ended up getting cancelled because his mother was called into the hospital on an emergency so Christian and I decide to have dinner out.

"Grey, reservations for two" Christian says as we walk into a very upscale restaurant that overlooks the water.

"Right this way sir" the waitress leads us to a table in the corner next to the windows.

"Christian this is beautiful" I say in awe watching the boats pass by.

"I'm glad you like it" he smiles.

"I'm looking forward to our trip tomorrow night" I say after we place our orders.

"Are you busy tomorrow?" He asks a few minutes later.

"Not really" I answer.

"Could you rearrange things so we could leave early tomorrow?" he asks, his eyes full of hope.

"You want to play hooky from work Mr. Grey?" I smirk.

"Only if it means I get to spend the day inside of you baby" he whispers.

"I could probably arrange that" I smile.

"You're killing me Ana" he groans.

"I'll send an email to Stacy when we get back having her reschedule anything on my schedule to next week" I say.

"Perfect…I can't wait for you to see the boat" he says with pride.

"Well hello there" a deep voice interrupts us.

I look up and gulp….

"Can I help you?" Christian asks sternly.

"Oh I just wanted to see your beautiful date here" he says.

"Well you've seen her, so if you will excuse us" Christian says angrily.

"I want to see more of her…" he moans.

"You've seen enough," Christian hisses.

"I believe you were told to leave" I say firmly, finally finding my voice. "If you don't, I'm going to see that our security over there escorts you out."

"You let her speak like that?" he asks glaring at Christian.

"Taylor, please escort this…him out" I request as Taylor stands next to me.

"Yes ma'am" Taylor nods. "Sir, please follow me."

"I will see more of you" he vows before leaving.

"Like hell you will" Christian yells back, everyone now starting at us.

"What the fuck!" Christian sighs sitting back in his seat.

"What was he doing here?" I ask.

"Come we're leaving" Christian says sternly.

"We haven't gotten the bill yet" I point out.

"They will bill me," he takes my hand leading me from the restaurant.

"When was the last time you saw him Anastasia?" Christian asks sternly once we are in the car.

"Not since the gala when you and I found each other again" I answer.

"Are you sure?" he asks.

"Yes Christian! I swear I haven't seen him since" I assure him.

"Taylor I want a full background check on him" Christian says.

"Do you have a name sir?" Taylor asks.

"I don't know it" I say as Christian looks at me.

"No Taylor" Christian replies.

"I will find him" Taylor says.

We reach Escala a few minutes later, Christian goes to his office saying he has work to do but I think he is more angry than anything. I never expected to see that man after the night he propositioned me at the BDSM club, then he showed up at the gala and now tonight at the restaurant. I'm sure it was just coincidence that he was at the same restaurant we were tonight, but I can't help but find it creepy that he keeps trying to proposition me. I send an email to Stacy and several of my editors letting them know that I will be out of the office tomorrow and will not be available until Monday. Stacy knows how to reach me should something important come up, but my plan is to not have any interruptions this weekend.

"Christian, I'm going to bed" I stand at his office doorway.

"Fine" he grimaces, running his hands through his hair.

"Come to bed with me?" I ask.

"No, I'm too angry" he says.

"Please baby?" I kiss him gently on the lips, feeling his tense body against mine.

"The way he talked to you, about you" he shivers wrapping his arms around me.

"I know….let's not think about him" I nip at his ear, pushing myself closer to him.

I take Christian's hand and lead him upstairs to the bedroom, the tension still emanating from his body. I close the door behind us before taking off my clothes; Christian is just standing there clearly deep in thought about what happened earlier. I slowly unbutton Christian's shirt, pulling it from his shoulders allowing it to fall as I kiss each scar on his chest lightly. His breath hitches but he doesn't say anything; I reach between us unbuttoning his pants before dropping to my knees so I can remove his pants and underwear. I grasp his hard erection, guiding him into my mouth as Christian's hands hold my head firm. He pulls me against him, thrusting his dick deep inside my throat as I struggle to control my gag reflex. I swallow around him which allows him to further slip down my throat; he holds me like this for several minutes before pulling back. He repeats this process several times before pulling me to my feet, guiding me to the bed.

"You don't know how angry I was" He sits on the bed with his back against the headboard.

"I know" I sigh.

"I don't like the way he looks at you" Christian grimaces. "Like he's eye fucking you."

"He can look but you're the only one who actually gets to fuck me" I say as I straddle him, gently rubbing his erection through my wet folds.

"This" he thrusts hard into me. "is mine."

"Yes…yours" I pant, my body desperately trying to adjust him.

"I'm the only one who gets to feel your sweet pussy gripping me tightly" he says moving me against him.

"Yes…yes…." I wrap my arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer to me as he continues to control the movements.

"And these" he pinches my nipples harshly. "These are mine."

"Yes!" I scream.

"And this clit….tell me who's this is" He orders.

"Yours Christian!" I moan as he pinches it.

As the need takes over, Christian begins to allow me to set my own pace. I'm holding onto his shoulders for support as I ride him hard and fast. His jealousy and anger fueling me, his grip on me getting tighter as I can feel him getting closer to his own release.

"And this" he thrusts two fingers into my mouth. "This wonderful, smart mouth is all mine."

"Hmmmmmm" I moan around his fingers as I suck, lick and nip them.

"And your orgasms are mine" he says removing his fingers from my mouth.

"Yes!" I moan.

"And this" he thrusts a finger into my ass causing me to gasp. "This tight, hot ass is mine and only mine. I am the only person who has ever been here and no one else will ever know what your ass feels like."

"Only you" I moan strangely touched by his words of possession.

"You are mine" He thrusts into both my holes forcefully.

"Yes…I'm yours Christian!" I scream.

"Come Ana" he commands. "Let me feel you come all over me."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I scream as he takes my nipple between his teeth tugging at it.

The added sensation on my nipple pushes me over the edge; I call Christian's name as I come around him hard. He doesn't stop; his hand is tight on my waist guiding my motions as his finger continues to thrust in and out me.

"Don't stop" Christian moans as I push myself further towards him, rubbing my clit again him as my body slowly regains feeling finally coming down from my orgasm.

"Ohhhhhhhh" I moan feeling the need rise again only moments later.

"Fuck me…Harder, deeper baby….Don't stop" He orders.

I grasp onto his neck for support and desperately try to follow his request. I'm rise slowly before thrusting myself down on him hard, until I feel my clit hit him then I hold him there grinding myself against him. My body quickly responds, the pace becomes more erratic as desire begins to take over and I find myself so close.

"You feel so good when you do that" He moans.

I don't quite get what he saying but as I continue my actions I quickly realize that each time I thrust down hard on Christian I'm pushing my ass back taking his finger in deeper. I'm too turned on to be embarrassed, instead focusing on bringing us both to our release.

"Oh GOD!" I scream as I feel him push another finger just into my opening letting me control how deep he goes.

"That's it baby….keep riding me like that…." He moans.

I'm so full, so overwhelmed with the sensations right now I know I won't last much longer. In this position has Christian in me so deep, combined with his fingers inside of me it all quickly becomes too much. With each move upward he slowly rubs against my g spot; with each thrust down he hits that magical spot with force but also has both fingers pushing into me deeper. Christian's hand wraps around my waist, guiding my movements so I can't slow down.

"You feel so good when you grip me like that…." He nips at my ear.

"I'm so close….please Christian" I beg, not sure exactly for what though.

"With me baby" he says.

With that he increases the pace, moving me forcefully up and down him with one hand as the other thrusts in and out me. I'm moaning loudly as I'm on the edge and desperate for a release as Christian doesn't seem to let up.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh" I scream as he slams me down against him as he thrusts himself into me deeper.

Within seconds I feel him swell inside of me which triggers my own orgasm as we both scream as relief finds us both. He continues to move inside of me prolonging my orgasm even more as I feel him spasm deep inside of me. My head falls onto his shoulder as he holds me tight against him, neither of us making any effort to break our connection.

"Mine" he whispers.

"And your mine" I nip at his ear.

"Since that first night in Taiwan" he moans.

"I've never wanted anyone else the way I want you…never felt so connected to someone" I admit.

"I love you Ana" He pulls his fingers out of me before holding me close to him and moving us so we are laying down, him above me.

"I love you Christian" I whisper.

"Hmmmmmmm" I moan as I feel him twitch while still inside of me.

"I could spend the rest of the night right here" he says slowly moving himself from me.

"Stay" I grip his firm ass, pulling him closer to me.

"I'm sorry for how I acted" He says a few minutes later.

"You have no reason to be" I smile.

"Knowing that he saw you in the club, that he tried to get you to scene with him after what I saw him do to that sub just disgusted me. You are never going back to a place like that" he vows.

"I have no reason to" I kiss him, pulling his mouth closer to mine.

We fall asleep just like that a few minutes later; Christian's head on my shoulder, our bodies still joined listening to each other breath. Tonight was an eye opener for me; I've never seen Christian jealous and possessive before at least not like he was when that creep from the BDSM club showed up. Once we went to the bedroom, the possessiveness continued over my entire body as we made love. I don't know if he realizes how final he talks sometimes; he mentioned again tonight about no one else having me the way he has which isn't the first time. I don't know if it's because he sees us together long term or if he simply doesn't want to think of anyone else being with me. Personally, I can't imagine being intimate with anyone else…even if things don't work out between me and Christian I know that I will never have the connection I have to him with anyone else. He was right when he said it's been there since our first night together in Taiwan; from that one scene in the club our connection was established and it's never lessened.

I wake up to Christian's lips on mine, kissing me softly as his tongue probes my lips. My hands immediately wrap around his neck, tugging at his hair to bring him closer to me. I moan into his mouth as he begins to slowly move his hips, moving his rock hard erection inside of me. His fingers tease my nipple, his tongue exploring my mouth as mine does the same to him. I wrap my legs around him, anchoring him to me as despite sleeping only moments ago my body quickly responds to his. His hands grasp my ass under us, pulling me closer to him so he hits my clit each time he thrusts deep into me.

"You feel so good…" I moan.

"You're so responsive; you're so wet, so warm, so tight" Christian thrusts deeper into me.

"Don't stop…please….don't stop" I beg as he stays deep inside of me, rotating his hips so he rubs against my clit roughly.

"I could get used to waking up like this….every morning inside of you" he moans.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" I scream as his words push me just over the edge, my back arches as my legs tighten around him pulling him even further into me.

"ANA!" He screams and I feel him find his release, his warmness felt throughout my entire body.

"Hmmmm…Good Morning" he says breathless.

"That's some way to wake up" I giggle.

"I blame you" he says.

"Me?" I ask innocently.

"You wouldn't let me leave you last night, spending the entire night here" he slowly moves in and out of me making a point. "Was so erotic; I woke up so hard for you."

"I noticed" I giggle.

"We should go shower and have breakfast so we can get to the boat early" He suggests.

"We should" I sigh.

"Don't worry…tonight I'm going to have you screaming my name on the open water" He smirks slowly pulling out of me.


	29. Chapter 29

_Author's Note: Sorry for the delay...real life got in the way again! I hope you enjoy this chapter!_

* * *

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 29 APOV:**

After breakfast, Taylor loads the car and drives us away from the city eventually parking near the marina where Christian's boat is docked. Walking along the dock I'm truly taken back by the large boats that we are passing; several look to be larger than most studio apartments. I shouldn't be surprised when we finally come to Christian's boat towards the end of the pier which is easily the largest boat docked here. On the end of the boat, in black elegant writing is the name "The Grace" clearly named after his mother.

"This is beautiful Christian" I say as he helps me aboard.

"Come, I'll show you around while Taylor loads the luggage" Christian grasps my hand tightly.

There is plenty of seating throughout the deck area of the boat; couches for laying down, single chairs for sun bathing and even seats that recline. There is a small landing just off the one side of the boat if you want to sit with your feet in the water while the boat is anchored. There's a ladder of course leading down to go swimming as well. Entering the main cabin of the boat it's obvious that Christian spared no expense when he designed the boat. There is a full kitchen, three full bathrooms, three bedrooms, an office, dining room and a great room. All the rooms are decorated in soft blues and greens complimented by the dark wood furniture. The master bedroom is almost as large as the master bedroom in my apartment; the en suite is a smaller version of Christian's bathroom on his master bedroom.

"Wow…this is really something" I say as we return to the main deck.

"Other than my family, you're the only woman who has ever been here with me" he pulls me tight against him as we overlook the water.

"Thank you for sharing this with me Christian" I say.

"Sir, ma'am" Taylor interrupts us moments later.

"Taylor" Christian replies.

"Your luggage is in the master bedroom, the fridge is well stocked with meals that Gail prepared and the pantry has been restocked as well" he explains.

"Thank you Taylor, and please tell Gail thank you" I smile.

"Yes ma'am" Taylor nods.

"The GPS located is on?" Christian asks.

"Yes sir and both of your phones have the GPS feature enabled" Taylor answers.

"Very well, call if you need anything" Christian dismisses Taylor.

"Do you need help with anything?" I ask as Christian is moving about the boat getting things ready for our trip.

"No, just sit back and relax" he smiles.

Within a few minutes Christian has everything ready and we slowly move away from the dock. The boat moves slowly around several other boats that are entering the marina before picking up speed once we hit the open water. The water sprays me lightly as we hit the waves while I sit back and watch the marina get smaller and smaller.

"Baby, come here" Christian calls for me.

I slowly make my way to Christian who is at the controls of the boat, walking on here is going to take some getting used to I realize. The boat bounces up and down as we move throughout the water, so I'm holding onto the railing as I make my way to Christian.

"Hold this, just like that" he lays my hands on the wheel.

"Like this?" I ask cautiously.

"Yes, just like that" his hands leave mine and I feel him step away.

"Where are you going?" I ask panicked.

"I'm going to get a couple of water bottles from the fridge" he disappears from sight.

"Christian!" I gasp realizing he is leaving me to control the boat.

"What?" he pokes his head out.

"What if something happens?" I ask worried.

"Keep your hand on the wheel like I showed you, if you approach something pull down on the throttle next to you" he instructs. "There's nothing out here, you will be fine."

Several minutes go by before Christian returns with bottled water and a couple of towels; surprisingly I'm much more comfortable at the controls than I was when Christian initially left.

"You okay?" He walks up behind me.

"More than okay; this is amazing Christian!" I exclaim.

"I knew you'd like it" he laughs.

"It's as if there is no one else in the world besides us right now, it's so calm out here" I say.

"It's one of the reasons I love taking the boat out on the water…you can leave the world behind" he admits.

"Do you come out here often?" I ask.

"No" he says sadly.

"Why?" I ask.

"I don't know" he sighs. "I guess while it's nice getting away from everything sometimes it would just remind me of how lonely my life really was."

"You must have taken your family out here?" I ask.

"A few times" he answers.

"I'll come out here anytime you want to get away….this is really beautiful" I say in awe.

He wraps his arms around my waist, holding me close to him while we continue to move into the open water. We coast through the water for some time before Christian slows the boat down and eventually we come to a complete stop. We are in the middle of the ocean, in the middle of nowhere and completely alone. Even though it's only the two of us here I feel completely safe.

"Would you like some lunch? Or would you rather swim first?" he asks.

"Oh let's swim" I say excited. "It's been so long since I've been swimming!"

"Really? Why?" he asks.

"I don't know…I guess just too busy" I admit.

"You know there's a pool at Escala right?" he asks.

"I know…but it's a small indoor one, you really can't swim in it" I explain. "When I buy a house I want a large in ground pool that you can swim laps in."

"That sounds nice" he admits.

"Let's get changed" I run to the master bedroom while Christian anchors the boat.

"You're lucky there is no one around here Anastasia" Christian says sternly.

"Why?" I ask.

"That bikini leaves nothing to the imagination" he smirks.

I look down but still don't see what the big deal it. I'm wearing an ivory bikini; the top has two small triangles to cover my breasts and the bottom is a matching thong. The only thing on display really is my ass since it's not covered.

"Well then it's a good thing you've seen everything and don't have to use your imagination" I laugh before heading back up to the deck.

Christian is back on the deck a few minutes later in board shorts, showing off his chiseled chest, carrying two towels and suntan lotion. He slowly applies the lotion to my back, shoulders and even my ass before giving the bottle to me so I can get my front. After covering myself with it, I squeeze a small amount in my hand and rub it into his firm chest and back. Just as I'm drying my hand on the towel Christian jumps off the boat into the water, splashing me with cool water. I laugh before jumping into the cool water, landing right next to Christian purposely splashing him. We spend the rest of the afternoon in the water or on the boat warming up in the sun enjoying the peacefulness that has found us out here. Gail prepared us several meals that we just need to reheat for lunch and dinner therefore actual cooking is not required which allows us to enjoy the trip even more. I don't think I've ever seen Christian as calm, relaxed and even playful as I saw him today.

"Today has been so perfect, thank you" I gush over dinner.

"I'm so glad you're enjoying it" he smiles. "With everything going on lately I think you were right to suggest we escape from the drama."

"I can't remember the last time I had this much fun" I admit.

"Well tomorrow is another day, we can spend the day doing whatever you want" he says.

"I think more swimming is definitely called for" I laugh.

"Come, let's go to the front of the boat I want to show you something" he leads me back to the main deck.

We lay down on the soft, plush cushions on the front of the boat; glancing up at the sky I am once again in awe.

"I've never seen so many stars" I whisper.

"This is something you will never see in Seattle" he agrees. "What do you say we go to bed?"

"Are you sure it's safe out here?" I ask cautiously as we walk towards the steps.

"There's a motion sensor alarm system installed on here baby, you have nothing to worry about" he assures me.

"There is?" I ask surprised.

"Yes, it covers all entry points of the boat including the railings. If the alarm is triggered Taylor is immediately notified" he explains.

"Oh, okay" I reply.

"Come, let's go break in my bed" he smirks.

Christian leads me down the steps to the master bedroom; the door is barely closed before he nearly rips off my bikini top, tossing it to the floor.

"This does nothing to cover your perfect tits Ms. Steele" he says pinching my nipple harshly.

"Ahhhhhh….it covers exactly what it's supposed to" I moan.

"And this?" he snaps my bottoms against me. "What exactly is this tiny piece of fabric supposed to cover?"

"The important parts" I smirk.

"And these ass cheeks aren't important?" he grips my ass hard, pulling me against his erection.

"I….Yes….No…." I stutter.

"I happen to find them very important" he swats my ass hard. "You're very lucky no one else could see you today."

"Only you…." I moan as he grinds himself against my sex.

"Are you going to wear this again if we're not alone?" he asks sternly.

"No…" I answer.

"When we get home I'm taking you shopping to buy you a bathing suit that doesn't show everyone what is mine, understood?" he asks.

"Yes!" I yelp as he pinches my nipple again.

"You have no idea how hard I was the moment you walked out looking like this" he moans as I push his bathing suit down.

"Really?" I ask surprised.

"It took everything in me not to take you over this bed and fuck you senseless, or in the water, or on the deck of the boat…well maybe not there in case anyone would see you" he says. "I think we would have allowed them to see enough of you in this skimpy bathing suit, don't you?"

"Uh…huh…" I barely respond as my mind focuses on his fingers brushing against my sex through the bikini bottoms.

"And this part here….barely covers your sweet pussy" he rubs me harder. "I could see the outline of your lips every time you moved…"

"I….ahhhhhh" I moan.

"I've wanted to do this all days" he pushes the bottoms down quickly before plunging a finger into my wet sex.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh" I grasp his erection tightly.

"Fuck…." He gasps before his lips find mine. "This is mine."

"Yes! Only yours" his thumb finds my clit.

"And this is mine" I stroke his hard length.

"Oh Ana…" he moans.

Christian quickly leads me to the bed; his mouth never leaving mine, his hands holding me close to him as we fall onto the bed together.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh" I moan as he plunges into me deeply.

"You feel so good baby…." He whispers as he rubs against my clit.

His hands grasp my ass, pulling me closer to him as I wrap my legs around his tight ass. My hands roam his firm back, loving that he is so comfortable with me that this doesn't bother him. The teasing moments ago already had me on edge, but feeling him so deep and rubbing my clit forcefully has me teetering on the edge, burning with desire.

"Christian…." I beg.

He doesn't say anything but increases the pace and the depth in which he is in me. My fingers grip his hair tightly as the need takes over; my hips are matching him thrust for thrust as he hits that magical spot deep inside of me.

"OHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream as the orgasm finally hits me hard.

"ANA!" Christian finds his only release moments later buried in me deep.

"Wow…." I say breathless.

"Yeah….wow…." he mimics.

"I love you" I whisper.

"God….I love you….so much Ana" he gently kisses me on the cheek before pulling out of me.

He quickly falls asleep, his arms wrapped around me tightly holding my back to his chest as I think about the last words he said. I am truly amazed at how far we have come, at how close we have gotten in the short amount of time since we found each other at the gala. I knew we had a strong connection in Taiwan but since the gala it has been different, so much more intense, so full of emotion. I've never experienced something as strong as the way I feel when I'm with Christian. Sleep finds me quickly but I can't help but replay Christian's last words to me….

"Good Morning" Christian kisses my ear.

"What time is it?" I yawn.

"Almost five" he answers.

"What are you doing waking me up so early?" I complain.

"You need to see something" he pulls the blankets off of me.

"At this hour?" I whine.

"Yes, come….put this on" he throws a robe to me as he gets out of bed.

"Do I have to?" I ask.

"Yes! Quickly or you will miss it!" he says excitedly.

I reluctantly get out of bed and put on the silk robe he gave me before heading up to the deck to join Christian. The morning air is cool against my bare skin, the robe providing very little warmth as the wind beats against my skin. Christian wraps a blanket around me, urging me to sit on the couch next to him.

"Oh Christian" I gasp, the sun is just beginning to rise over the water.

"This is not something you want to miss" he whispers.

"Wow…." I say.

He holds me close to him as we sit and watch the sunrise together over the open water, a view I will never forget. The day is spent much like yesterday, in and out of the water with occasional sun bathing on the boat deck. Christian occasionally responds to emails but his focus this weekend for the most part is only on me. He has been so relaxed this weekend, it's easy to see why he loves coming out here.

"Are you ready to head back to reality tomorrow?" Christian asks as we lay on the couch looking at the stars.

"No…" I sigh.

"Me neither" he agrees.

"Can we come out here again soon?" I ask.

"Anytime you want baby" he smiles. "I'm so glad you like it."

"I'm surprised we haven't seen more people out here" I recall only seeing a handful of boats in the last two days.

"It's one of the reasons I like coming out here so much, you can truly be alone with your thoughts without being interrupted" he kisses me gently on the cheek. "Come, let's go to bed."

"Yes…sir" I say quietly, my eyes falling to the floor as I hear his breath hitch at what I'm suggesting.

"Go to the great room and wait for me" he commands, his voice stern and full of authority.

"Yes sir" I agree before quickly making my way down the steps.

I take off the sundress I've been wearing since dinner and kneel on the floor in position waiting for Christian. I hear him come down the steps but he goes into the bedroom for several minutes before returning to the great room. He stands me up, pushing my legs apart with his feet before he steps out of the shorts. I can feel his eyes on me, looking my body over and I can feel the need for him growing. I gasp as his lips quickly latch onto my nipple, sucking it hard as his hand holds my wrists behind my back.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh" I moan as I feel something clipped to my nipple.

"Since you want to play here I had to improvise" he smirks just before latching onto my other nipple.

Looking down I realize what he was referring to…attached to my nipple is a wooden clothespin which is pinching my nipple harshly. The pinch is different than that of a nipple clamp; the clothespin lacks the metal teeth at nipple clamp has but the pinch is tighter since it cannot be adjusted. Just as my body adjusts to this, Christian attaches another clothespin to my other nipple. I take a couple deep breaths trying to force my body to relax. He moves behind me, his erection between my ass cheeks as his hands grip my hips tightly urging me to move against him.

"Are you wet?" Christian whispers in my ear.

"Yes sir" I moan.

"Show me" he moves my hand to my sex.

I hesitantly rub my fingers through my folds, the excitement coating my fingers before I bring my hand up to show Christian. I gasp as he takes my fingers into his mouth, licking and sucking the juices off of them before returning my hand to my sex.

"Play with yourself…don't come" he orders before settling on the couch in front of me.

I blush deeply but comply with his request, exploring my sex as he watches my every move. I can feel myself getting more turned on by the minute, not just from my actions but knowing the Christian is watching me right now.

"Don't stop….come here….I want you to suck me when you play with your pussy" he orders.

I awkwardly comply with his request, walking towards him with my fingers still on me as I drop to my knees in front of the couch. He lays his hand gently on my head, urging me towards his rock hard erection. He immediately pushes my head down, forcing me to take him in deep and he doesn't stop until he hits the back of my throat. I slowly breath through my nose, willing my body to relax as I try to fight off the gag reflex.

"Show me how wet you are" he orders as I swallow against him.

Blushing deeply I bring my hand from my sex up, again he immediately takes my fingers into his mouth licking and sucking them. I moan loudly around him as Christian sucks on my fingers increases my need even more.

"Put two of your fingers in that tight wet pussy" he orders.

"Hmmmmmmmmm" I moan as I do as he asks.

"That's it….Don't come….your orgasms belong to me" he says breathlessly.

Without warning he pushes my head down on him harshly, thrusting himself deep into my throat as I struggle with the sudden intrusion. He holds my head tight against him, his balls against my chin as I gag around him. My eyes tear as I struggle to relax my body, with my own fingers still inside of me I was not prepared for him to suddenly thrust into my mouth and it caught me off guard. He seems to be enjoying my struggle though because he is not letting me move my head back.

"Breath" he commands.

I take a deep breath through my nose and almost immediately relax on around him, letting him slide deeper into me. Instinctively I swallow around him; he groans in appreciate above me and I find my body relaxing even further knowing that I'm pleasing him. His hand relaxes on my head, allowing me to bob up and down against him.

"Play with your clit while you fuck that sweet pussy with your fingers" he requests.

I moan around him, knowing that the moment I touch my clit I will be dangerously close to the edge. His hand is firm on my head, guiding my movements now, reminding me of who is in charge as I reluctantly comply with his request. Almost immediately my body is on fire, burning with need and desire as even the slightest pressure on my clit nearly sends me over the edge. I've never been able to make myself come from masturbation but right now I don't know how much longer I can hold the orgasm back. Without warning he pulls my head back hard, so I'm looking at him while the tip of his erection is against my lips.

"Don't stop fucking yourself….come up here" he orders.

With my fingers still deep inside of me, I climb onto the couch straddling his lap.

"I want to see you make yourself come" he says.

"Ohhhhhhh" I moan as he takes the clothespins off my very sore nipples.

"Fuck your pussy the way you like me to fuck you" he commands.

"Hmmmmmmmmmm" I moan as desire takes over and all sense of embarrassment leaves.

I'm straddling him, his erection rubs against my hand each time I pull my fingers out of my throbbing sex. My eyes are closed but I can feel him watching my every move; his breathing is heavy like mine, his hands are next to him on the couch not touching me. As I plunge my fingers in and out of me hard, I find myself on the edge but it's not enough….I can't seem to find the release my body so desperately craves.

"Christian…." I beg.

"You look so beautiful right now…" he pulls me against him, sucking my nipple hard.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh" I moan loudly; his mouth on me pushing me further to the edge.

"Come Ana!" he commands as he bites my nipple hard.

"OHHHH!" I moan as I finally find my release but it's not nearly as enjoyable as when Christian makes me come. It's almost a disappointment as my body is still on the edge, still craving a release.

"You're so fucking hot when you come" he hand is on mine, guiding my fingers in out of my sex.

"Please….sir….." I beg.

"Tell me what you need" he orders.

"You sir….please" I moan.

"Did you not enjoy that?" he asks.

"Yes….no…..sir…."I blush in embarrassment.

"Tell me" he says sternly.

"I need you….please I'm so close….I need more" I beg quietly.

"Get on the floor, on all fours" he says a moment later.

I quickly move myself to the floor as he said; once again I hear him moving throughout the cabin for several minutes before returning to me.

"Put your hands next to your ankles" he says.

I pause only for a moment which earns me a slap against my ass before I do as he asked, my head laying against the plush warm carpet. He ties my wrists to my ankles; I can tell he is using the tie from my silk robe on my one wrists but I don't know where the other tie came from.

"God you're so wet….I can tell how wet you are without even touching you" he moans behind me.

"Yes sir" I pant.

"I should punish you from trying to top from the bottom like that" he pauses. "But, I'm struggling because you were being honest. I've decided I will let you come again…"

"Thank you sir" I sigh in relief, knowing that I wouldn't be able to stay like this much longer.

"But only when I do" he says sternly. "And I think when we get home we will need to spend some extra time in the playroom this week reminding you of who is in charge."

"Yes sir" I moan as the thought of returning to the playroom excites me even more.

"Now quiet!" he slaps my ass just before plunging into me hard and deep.

I bite my tongue, struggling not to scream in relief as I finally feel him inside of me. He hands are all over me, holding my back down, gripping my hips tightly, grabbing my ass as he continues to fuck me hard. He slaps my ass several times before leaning over me, resting his hands next to my head pushing himself so deep into me that I move against the floor.

"You feel so good….so tight….so wet…." He whispers.

I whimper as his words push me closer to the edge; my hands grip my ankles tightly as I struggle to withhold the orgasm.

"Is this what you needed?" he nips my ear, thrusting deeper.

"Yes sir" I moan.

"I can't wait to get you home and take you into the playroom," he says.

He stays like this for several minutes, before moving back up grasping my hips and pulling me tight against him. He nearly withdrawals all the way before plunging back into me, his balls slapping my clit with each thrust. I'm struggling to hold the orgasm back as desire courses through my veins; the orgasm moments ago was nothing compare to what is going to come when Christian finds his own release.

"Oh God….Ana….So fucking hot….so tight…." He moans as his thrusts become more frantic.

"Hmmmmmm" I moan loudly, no longer able to control myself.

He slaps my ass but doesn't say anything as he breathing hitches and he grips me tighter.

"Come now ANA!" he screams as I feel him erupt inside me moments later.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream as the orgasm finally hits; this one is so much larger than the one moments ago and immediately I feel the relief I was needing.

He unties my wrists and ankles before slowly pulling out of my still throbbing sex. I immediately moan in disappointment at the sudden empty feeling.

"Come, clean me up" he sits on the couch.

I crawl over to him, taking his still hard erection into my mouth tasting the combination of our juices on him. He sits back on the couch, closing his eyes as he lets me set my own pace this time. As he begins to barely soften in my mouth I can feel the evidence of our act sliding down my thighs.

"I think you need a shower" he chuckles as I try to clench my thighs together.

After a long, hot, relaxing shower we make our way to the bed quickly falling asleep in each other's arms. When the morning sun peaks through the windows I am immediately reminded that this is our final day here and that after breakfast we will be heading back to reality. After a quick breakfast, Christian turns the boat around and we head back to the marina in silence. I think we are both disappointed that our peaceful weekend but as we dock the boat Christian promises to bring me back here soon.

Monday and Tuesday pass by quickly, Christian is busy at work most of the day and night working on some acquisition of a company in New York. He has told me a little about the company but I'm not familiar with them which isn't too surprising since our businesses are quiet opposite. He mentions the possibility of having to fly to New York in the next few weeks and asks for me to join him. As much as I would like to, I tell him that I will have to wait and see how things are at SIP as the time gets closer before I let him know.

It's Wednesday afternoon and I'm sitting in my office reviewing my calendar plotting out when several meetings are going to take place as well as some key releases this month that are expected to top the charts. It's only when I finally sit back and look at my calendar do I realize that my period is late…like over a week late. I've been on a birth control pill for over a year but it's the type of pill that only allows you to get your period once every three months; initially I started on it because I had pretty bad cramps when my period would start but then I just continued with it because it was much nicer only having to deal with it every couple of months. I stopped the pill last Saturday which meant I should have had my period by Monday or Tuesday the latest. It's now the following week and still nothing; I can't believe that I didn't realize it never started before now.

"Sawyer…I need to run to the store" I call him on my cell.

"I'll be down in a moment ma'am…I could pick something up for you if you would prefer" he says.

"NO!" I exclaim quickly. "I mean…I wouldn't mind a little fresh air."

Moments later Sawyer is at my door and I follow him down to the car. I give him directions to a drug store a few blocks away; there are ones closer but I don't want to take the risk of anyone from SIP or GEH seeing me or rather seeing what I'm buying.

"Sawyer….I know you need to come in with me but I have a favor to ask" I begin as Sawyer parks the car.

"Okay…." He pauses.

"I'm going to ask you to not tell Mr. Grey or Taylor what I'm going to purchase in the store" I take a deep breath. "I promise you I will tell Mr. Grey later but I need to get through the day without him knowing. Can you do that for me?"

"Of course Ana….is everything okay?" he asks.

"I don't know" I sigh.

Sawyer accompanies me into the store, following me as I slip into the feminine product aisle. If I wasn't so anxious I would probably laugh at how uncomfortable Sawyer looks right now, but instead I move to the end of the aisle where the pregnancy tests are. A glance at Sawyer confirms my thought, his face is now pale as surprise begins to take over. Thankfully he doesn't say anything, we pay for my purchase which I quickly stuff into my purse the moment we get into the car and head back to SIP.

"Ana….if you need anything" he says as I get off the elevator.

"Thank you Sawyer, I appreciate this" I reply as the doors close.


	30. Chapter 30

_Author's note: sorry for the massive delay. I had most of this chapter written on Thursday but I really didn't care for it so I decided to think about it further before posting it. Over the weekend my opinion did not change so this morning I decided to rewrite pretty much the entire chapter. It's a little shorter than normal; hopefully the wait was worth it!_

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 30 APOV:**

Sitting at my desk trying to get work done the rest of the day, I have a horrible knot in my stomach. I was planning on coming back to the office and taking the test as soon as I got off the elevator but once I got here I realized I'm too scared. I call my doctor's office and schedule an appointment for tomorrow morning; I feel so stupid when I tell the lady I think I might be pregnant and say no when she asks if I have taken a test to confirm it. I don't know what I think…right now I'm just scared. Scared at the thought of being pregnant and scared for how Christian will react if the test is positive. We've never talked about having children, hell we really haven't even discussed a future together. I just moved in with him officially few days ago, and while I can't see myself without him we've never discussed anything long term. I've never really thought about having kids; I mean sure in the back of my head I assumed someday I would but I at least thought it would occur after I was married. I have no idea how Christian feels about having children; he's never discussed it and I've never seen him around children. As much as I want to think this could be a false alarm, I know my body….I'm never late, ever.

_Are you working late tonight? –A_

_I don't know, hope not –C_

_I need to talk to you tonight, can you please try to come home at a reasonable time? –A_

_Everything okay? –C_

_Please, just don't come home too late –A_

"Hello?" I answer my cell phone.

"Ana, what's going on? Is everything okay?" Christian immediately asks.

"Christian…please I want to talk at home, not here" I beg.

"You're scaring me Ana" he says quietly.

"Just come home when you can, please?" I ask.

"I'll be home by six" he vows.

"Thank you" I whisper.

"Anything for you Ana" he hangs up.

I finally decide to leave the office a little after five, having gotten absolutely nothing done since I picked up the pregnancy tests earlier this afternoon. Thankfully Sawyer doesn't say anything on our drive back to Escala; I'm thankful for the quiet ride even if it is short. As much as I want to know if I'm pregnant, I don't want to think about what will happen if I am. I'm so worried about Christian's reaction and what it would mean for our relationship. I know I would never consider terminating the pregnancy; it's just not something I could do. I feel like Christian and I have nice balance between our bedroom and playroom time; how would pregnancy and a baby change that? Will we have to stop going into the playroom? Will Christian still find me attractive when my stomach gets huge? Will he expect me to quit work because of the baby? I don't think I could ever just stop working, especially not having just taken over SIP and Seattle E Books. Will Christian want to be involved? What if he doesn't want the baby?

"Hello Ana" Gail greets me, pulling me from my thoughts as she walks into the great room.

"Hi Gail" I smile.

"Would you like a glass of wine while you wait for dinner?" she asks.

"Yes….no, maybe just a bottle of cold water" I answer, quickly realizing that I probably shouldn't be drinking until I know for sure.

"Of course" Gail looks puzzled but returns moments later with a bottle of water.

"Ana, baby….is everything okay?" Christian quickly sits next to me on the couch a few moments later.

"I don't know" I say, my voice so shaky I can barely understand myself.

"What's wrong? Is your dad okay? Has something happened?" he asks.

"My dad is fine" I sigh. "I'm scared, Christian."

"Scared of what? What's happened?" his voice full of concern.

"I'm late" I blurt out.

"Late? Late for….oh…" he pales at the realization.

"Yeah that" I whisper.

"Are you….? Have you….?" He stutters.

"I bought a test today, but I was too scared to take it at work" I show him the box.

"Let's go upstairs to the bathroom" he takes my hand and leads me to our bedroom.

"Christian, what if…?" I ask.

"Go, take the test" he ushers me into the bathroom.

I quickly read the instructions, which aren't very complicated before holding the test under me as I pee. I place the cap back on the test, leaving it on the sink while I wash my hands. I return to the bedroom where Christian is pacing the floor and set the timer on my phone. I sit on the bed, watching Christian pace while holding my breath. The alarm goes off on my phone, indicating the five minutes are up that the instructions said to wait before reading the test. I turn off the alarm and slowly stand up; Christian grips my hand tightly, pulling me against him.

"No matter what, it will be okay" he assures me.

We walk into the bathroom hand in hand; I think we both gasp when we look at the test and see the word PREGNANT in bright blue lettering.

"I think I need a drink" Christian leaves the bedroom, I assume heading for his office.

I sit on the bed, absolutely shocked. I don't know how long I just sit before finally deciding to make my way downstairs. We don't need to figure everything out right now, but I at least need to know what Christian is thinking. He hasn't flipped out yet but he's hasn't really shown any emotions either or really said a word. I check the kitchen which is empty except for two covered plates on the breakfast bar which I can only assume is our dinner. I knock on Christian's office door but he doesn't answer, I try to open the door but find that it is locked. At least I know that means he is in there and hasn't left the apartment yet. As much as I want to demand he open the door, I know I need to give him space right now. I have to trust that when he is ready he will come and find me. Returning to the kitchen, I grab my plate of pasta that Gail prepared and take it to the dining room. Although I'm not hungry, I force myself to eat a few bites before settling on the couch in the great room with a manuscript I brought home with me. As much as I try I just can't concentrate enough to get past the first chapter; this time I know the reason is not the dullness of the story and is more because of everything going on. After some time I finally give up on the manuscript and turn the television on, hoping it will just tune everything out while I wait for Christian.

My alarm goes off the next morning but it takes me several minutes to realize that I am now in our bed alone. The last thing I remember was laying on the couch in the great room watching television; I assume at some point Christian carried me up here. His side of the bed is empty and it doesn't look as if it was slept in all night. The covers are only jostled on my side of the bed, while his side is made perfectly and feels cold to the touch. I reluctantly get out of bed, take a shower and get dressed before heading downstairs in the hopes of finding Christian. I don't know if he slept in his office last night or maybe in a guest room but I hate that we went to bed without talking. I couldn't feel further disconnected from him then I do right now; I realize he was shocked by the news but hell so was I! I'm still in shock but I just can't hold myself up in an office and get drunk hoping it will go away.

"Good Morning Ana" Gail greets me as I walk into the kitchen.

"Morning…have you seen Christian?" I ask.

"He left a couple of hours ago with Taylor" she answers.

"Oh, thanks" I sigh.

"I know it's none of my business, but whatever is going on between you two just give him some time. He will come around" she smiles sympathetically.

"Thanks Gail, I appreciate it" I reply.

_I have a doctor's appointment at 10 this morning, if you want to come –A_

I don't hear back from Christian which doesn't surprise me. On our way to the office I inform Sawyer of my doctor's appointment and we arrange a time to leave to allow us plenty of time to get there incase there is traffic. Thankfully Sawyer does not say anything although I'm sure he knows the reason for the appointment. The morning passes by very slowly, as much as I try I cannot stop thinking about the fact that I'm pregnant. I'm becoming more comfortable with the idea of a baby, but I'm still scared shitless. I don't know much about babies or being pregnant but I quickly order several books online, requesting overnight delivery to Escala. If nothing else, I will read as much as possible to prepare for this new adventure. With or without Christian I am confident that I will be able to handle whatever comes my way. I'm hopeful that Christian will come around but if he doesn't I am prepared to do this on my own if need be. I am more concerned about how the pregnancy and the baby will affect my relationship with Christian, assuming he even wants to continue to have a relationship. I spend some time on the internet researching BDSM and pregnancy; clearly I'm not the first person in a BDSM type relationship who has become pregnant. After reviewing quite a bit of research and visiting a few chat rooms, without joining of course, I feel much more comfortable with it. Most research and websites suggest to avoid things that Christian and I don't engage in like fire play, blood play or extreme bondage so I don't believe we will need to change much of what we already do if Christian wants to continue a relationship together.

Finally finding myself a little more at ease, I leave for my appointment with Sawyer still having not heard from Christian. I'm disappointed that he didn't at least respond to my text even if it was to tell me he couldn't make the appointment because of his own schedule or something. I try to remind myself that he might need more time and is probably just as shocked as I was, but it's hard when he isn't even talking to me right now. We arrive at the doctor's office a few minutes early; Sawyer waits with me in the waiting room and lets me know he will drive me back to GEH when my appointment is finished. I feel bad having him just wait in the waiting room and suggest that he at least go get a cup of coffee or something nearby but he won't hear of it and reminds me that this is his job.

"Ms. Steele?" the nurse asks.

"That's me" I follow the nurse back to the examination room.

"Put this gown on, opening in the front. Leave a urine sample in the bathroom, the doctor will be with you shortly" she explains before leaving.

I quickly use the bathroom, providing the sample as she requested and change into the gown before returning to the room where I sit on the cold table and wait. After a few minutes there is a knock on the door, slowly turning around I am shocked to see who walks the door.

"Christian?" I whisper.

"Sorry I'm late, I had a call that ran behind" he kisses my cheek.

"I didn't think you were coming" I admit.

"I know," he sighs. "I'm sorry I haven't talked to you."

Just as I'm about to respond, there is another knock on the door. Christian grips my hand tightly, his normal confident attitude is gone, replaced by uncertainty.

"Anastasia?" Dr. Greene asks as she opens the door.

"Ana, please" I shake her hand. "This is my…boyfriend, Christian Grey."

"Mr. Grey, I'm Dr. Greene" she shakes his hand.

"Pleased to meet you" he says.

"I understand that you think you are pregnant?" she says looking at my chart.

"I took a test last night and it was positive" I answer.

"When was your last period?" she asks.

"About three months ago, I was due last week" I explain.

"This test also confirms that you are pregnant" she says dipping a strip into the cup which immediately turns blue. "How about we have a look and see how far along you are?"

"Okay" I agree.

"Lay back and put your legs in the stirrups. Since you're probably pretty early along this will need to be an internal ultrasound" she explains.

I lay back, putting my feet in the stirrups and moving my waist down to the end of the table. Christian holds my hand tightly as nervousness overtakes both of us.

"This is probably going to be uncomfortable, but it shouldn't hurt" she assures me as she holds up this large dildo looking item which looks like it is covered a condom. I immediately gulp realizing what she is going to do with that thing. Christian's eyes are huge right now, but thankfully he doesn't say anything. I can only imagine what he is thinking…

"Try to relax" she says as I feel her gently ease it into me.

"Are you okay?" Christian whispers.

I nod, letting out the breath I had been holding as my body slowly adapts to the foreign object.

"There it is….look at the screen" Dr. Greene says.

We both look at the screen as she describes what we are trying to look at.

"This is your baby" she points to a small object on the screen. "This flashing spot is the heartbeat, here is the head and this is the spine."

"Oh my" I whisper.

"You look to be around six to seven weeks along, which places your due date around the beginning of April" she explains slowly removing the wand from me. "I'll give you a few minutes to clean up and change then I will be back with a prescription for vitamins and some pamphlets for you to read" she says as she walks out.

"Are you okay?" I ask, Christian hasn't said anything since Dr. Greene left.

"I think so" his voice full of uncertainty.

"I'm going to change" I say, hoping off the table and walking into the bathroom.

"Here are the pamphlets I mentioned" Dr. Greene returns a few minutes later with a stack of pamphlets. "They cover everything from morning sickness remedies, to commonly asked question, to nutritional information. Here are some sample prenatal vitamins to get you through the first week and a script for the rest. What questions do you guys have?"

"Is there anything I shouldn't be doing?" I ask.

"No," she smiles. "You're not disabled or injured. You can do everything you normally do; well…I would avoid contact sports if you participate in any."

"That's not an issue" I laugh.

"You can do anything you do now, just listen to your body. Don't start any crazy exercise regimens, stick to anything you currently do" she explains.

"Is it safe to have sex?" Christian asks as I blush deeply.

"Yes it's perfectly safe" she assures us. "As the pregnancy progresses you will want to adapt your positions to find things that are most comfortable for Ana. As I said listen to your body Ana, if you become uncomfortable then change position. Intercourse should never be painful but if it is please be sure to call the office. Many women even find they have an increased sex drive when pregnant but everyone is different."

"Thank you Dr. Greene" I blush.

"Do you have any other questions?" she asks.

"I don't think so" I answer.

"None for me" Christian says.

"Schedule an appointment in about six weeks and we should be able to hear the heartbeat. You may experience slight cramping as your uterus expands, but it shouldn't be painful. If you have painful cramps or any bleeding call the office immediately, but otherwise we will see you in six weeks" she says leaving the room.

"I don't know how we would have survived if she said we couldn't have sex" Christian laughs. "It's been hell these last few days let alone what nine months of this would be like."

"I was worried about that too" I giggle.

"What do you say we work from home today?" Christian suggests.

"I can do that, I just need to pick up my laptop" I say.

"We can have Sawyer pick it up" he replies.

"Did it hurt?" Christian asks as we sit in the great room waiting for Sawyer to pick up my laptop as I look through the paperwork Dr. Greene gave us.

"What?" I ask.

"When Dr. Greene did the ultrasound?" he clarifies.

"No, it was uncomfortable but it didn't hurt" I explain.

"I didn't like seeing someone else stick something inside of you like that" he grimaces.

"Christian! She's a doctor!" I exclaim surprised at his jealousy.

"I know" he sighs. "I still didn't like it. I don't know that I could have handled it if the doctor was a man."

"I don't think we will have any more like that so you have nothing to worry about" I laugh.

"Really?" he asks.

"According to what I'm reading here the next ultrasound will be external; they only do the internal ones when you are really early" I explain.

"Oh….good" he says.

"What are you thinking about all of this? You haven't said very much" I ask.

"I don't know" he sighs. "I'm nervous as hell, I'm scared….fuck it's overwhelming."

"Did you ever see yourself having kids?" I ask hesitantly.

"No" he answers quickly. "But I never saw myself living with a woman either or ever being able to let someone touch me the way you do."

We both work from Christian's office the remainder of the day, me set up on a small table and him behind his desk. I'm finding it a little easier to concentrate as compared to yesterday but I'm still nervous about what this means for our relationship. Although we have moved in together and both love each other, I feel like we haven't been together very long at all especially not when we talking about having a baby together. I'm also worried about how my dad will react; he hasn't even met Christian yet. I've talked to him plenty of times about Christian but we just haven't had a chance to take a trip out to see him yet. I have no idea how Christian's parents will react; I've at least met them several times but I don't know if that helps the situation.

"I can see your wheels turning from here…what are you thinking about?" Christian asks.

"Everything" I sigh.

"How about you narrow that down for me?" he suggests.

"Telling my dad, telling your family….wondering what everyone will think" I say.

"I don't give a fuck what everyone thinks and neither should you. This is about you, me and little blip…no one else!" Christian exclaims.

"Little blip?" I ask.

"That was my first thought when Dr. Greene pointed to the screen…there was this little blip on the screen. I hadn't realized that it was a baby I was looking at until she said something…" Christian explains.

"I'm scared Christian" I whisper.

"Me too Ana" he admits. "But I promise you I will be there every step of the way. I know I acted like an ass when you first told me and I cannot apologize enough for that. I was fucking shocked but I shouldn't have shut you out like that."

"My dad's going to freak out" I sigh.

"Probably" he says. "We can visit him whenever you want to tell him."

"We should probably plan to tell both our families soon" I reply.

"We will" he says. "How are you feeling?"

"Physically, I feel fine. I really don't feel any different" I admit.

"Emotionally?" he asks.

"I guess…." I pause. "I'm not as shocked as I was last night; I ordered a few books online today-"

"So did I" he smiles.

"Really?" I ask surprised.

"Of course" he answers. "Whenever I take on a new acquisition at GEH, I research everything possible on the company. When I first started looking into BDSM, I researched the hell out of it learning everything I could before deciding to visit the club in Taiwan. This isn't that different…it's a new area that I felt I needed to research."

"I spent a lot of time this morning online too" I admit.

"What did you learn?" he asks.

"That we can still have fun in the playroom" I smile shyly.

"I spent some time researching that too" he says sitting next to me on the couch. "It seemed like most of the acts they recommended we stay away are hard limits for both of us. I don't want you to ever be afraid to safe word if you need to, especially right now. If you aren't enjoying something or I'm pushing you beyond what you think you can handle I need you to tell me. It's more important right now than ever that you talk to me."

"I know….I promise I will talk to you" I vow.

"Mr. Grey, Ms. Steele?" Gail knocks on the door.

"Yes Gail?" Christian asks.

"Dinner is ready sir" Gail says.

"Shall we?" he asks.

"So…from what Dr. Greene was saying the baby is due in the spring" I say as we eat dinner a few moments later.

"A week before my mom's birthday" Christian replies.

"How do you think your parents will react?" I ask.

"I don't know" he sighs. "I'm sure they always thought Elliot would be the one to have this conversation with them."

"Elliot?" I ask.

"Let's just say before he met Kate, he enjoyed the company of women…a lot of women" Christian laughs.

"But they didn't think you did?" I ask.

"You're the first woman that I've brought home" he smiles. "Elliot on the other hand seemed to bring a new one home every other week."

"Do you think they will hate me?" I whisper.

"Why would they hate you?" he asks shocked.

"I don't want them to think I'm trapping you or something" I admit.

"Oh baby, they won't think that" he assures me.

"Are you sure?" I ask.

"My family adores you, they know that you're not with me for my money" he says.

"I just worry….I mean how this all looks….we haven't been together that long" I try to explain.

"All they need to know is that we love each other," he says confidently. "Why don't we go upstairs and take a bath?"


	31. Chapter 31

_Author's Note: I was so pleased to read your reactions to how Christian handled learning that Ana was present. My intention was never to have him full out blow up at her like in the original books but I wanted to convey the real shock that he felt. Our couple has not been together very long, combined with their new lifestyle, this is going to be an interesting journey for them. Thank you all for your continued support and encouragement! This chapter has several lemons in it as they both begin to adjust to their new situation..._

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 31 APOV:**

The sun wakes me early Saturday, much earlier than I wanted but I'm finding it difficult to go back to sleep. Christian is sound asleep next to me and doesn't move as I cuddle next to him, laying my leg across his. We haven't been intimate since we came back from our boat trip and it's really starting to get to me. I was never the type of person who needed sex every day, hell before I met Christian in Taiwan it had been over a year since I had sex, but now it's like I can't get enough. Earlier this week Christian was working late hours on a project in New York but since we found out I was pregnant he has barely touched me even though we have gone to bed together every night. I don't know if he is nervous about it even though Doctor Greene said we could have sex, but I don't think I could wait much longer. Our connection feels so much stronger when we are together, whether it's in our bed or in the playroom, I can almost always tell how he is feeling by the way he touches me. I decide to take matters into my own hands, literally, as I grasp his soft erection and start slowly stroking it.

"Ana?" Christian looks at me surprised.

"I need you" I say confidently.

"But…." He begins, but I cut him off by pressing my lips firmly against him and gently moving on top of him.

His now hard erection rubs against my slit as I slowly move myself against him as his tongue explores my mouth. His hands slowly make their way up my body before finally grasping my breasts, pinching my nipples hard. I'm surprised at how incredibly sensitive my nipples are and can only assume this is my body beginning to change with the pregnancy. I gasp at the sudden pain/pleasure combination and try to move against Christian even more.

"I missed you so much Ana" he moans.

"I missed you….it's been too long" I agree.

"This is going to be quick….I'm not going to be able to last long" he pushes my hips down hard so he slides into me, filling me completely.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh" I moan as the sudden fullness.

"So hot….so tight…." He grasps my ass tightly, moving me against him.

The pace is slow and steady, the need quickly rising in both of us as we both breathe heavily and moan. My hands fist his hair as he continues to slide me up and down his length, bringing me closer to the edge. I can feel the caution in his moves, he isn't fucking me as hard or as deep as he normally does but I know this is what he must need right now. I'm sure on some level he still thinks he will hurt me somehow but everything I have read has said that having sex, even rough, won't hurt the baby. I gently lean up, Christian takes advantage of this new position, grasping my sensitive nipples again which goes right to my sex. With his hands on my breasts, I take advantage of this and begin moving myself against him slowly. Christian closes his eyes and moans in ecstasy which is when I begin to increase the pace.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I scream as the orgasm finally comes within reach.

"That's it baby….yeah….don't stop" Christian begs.

"I'm so close….." I moan as Christian continues to hit that spot every time I push myself onto him.

"Come Ana!" Christian orders just as the need becomes too much.

"CHRISTIAN!" I call out as I feel the orgasm throughout my entire body.

Christian's hands are on my hips, moving me against him as my body is practically limp from the orgasm. Gone is any hesitation, my Christian has returned and is eagerly using my body to find his pleasure. I lean forward, kissing him passionately as he slams my hips against him hard one last time.

"Hmmmmmmmmmmm" he moans into my mouth as I feel him find his release deep inside of me.

"I missed you so much" I whisper as I lay on top of him, as he continues to twitch inside of me.

"I didn't hurt you did I?" Christian asks.

"No, baby….you felt so good" I assure him.

"I was so nervous I was going to hurt you" he admits.

"I will tell you if you do, but please….we can't go that long again" I beg.

"Agreed…I plan on making it up to you all weekend" he smiles.

"I like that idea" I giggle.

"Let's grab some breakfast before round two…you're going to need some energy" he smirks.

Throwing on a t shirt and shorts we make our way to the kitchen where Gail is already preparing our breakfast. Gail sets a plate of eggs and bacon in front of us just as a wave of nausea comes over me, I jump from the breakfast bar and just make it to the hallway powder room toilet before I lose my dinner from last night. Christian is quickly behind me, holding my hair back as the rest of my stomach is emptied. When I'm finished, he doesn't say anything but hands me a cool, wet washcloth which instantly helps me feel better. I wash up in the sink, using the spare toothbrush that I found in a drawer to brush my teeth while Christian returns to the breakfast bar.

"Are you okay dear?" Gail asks as I walk back into the kitchen.

"Yes thank you Gail" I smile.

"Taylor!" Christian calls as I sip on a cup of tea waiting for my stomach to settle.

"Yes sir?" Taylor quickly appears in the doorway.

"Taylor, Gail….Ana and I have some news that we would like to share with you" Christian pauses to see if I'm okay with what he is about to say; I nod letting him know to continue. "We learned yesterday that Ana is pregnant."

"Congratulations to the both of you" Gail says quickly hugs me and Christian, startling him.

"Congratulations sir, ma'am" Taylor says.

"Thank you" I reply.

"We are asking that for right now you keep this information to yourselves as we have not yet had the opportunity to inform our parents" Christian explains.

"Yes sir" Taylor says.

"Of course" Gail agrees. "Ana, can I get you something other than eggs?"

"Maybe just some toast?" I ask. "At least until my stomach settles?"

"No problem" Gail answers.

"When do you think we should tell our parents?" I ask Christian as we finish our breakfast.

"Whenever you want" he answers.

"We would need to plan a trip to Portland to see my dad, I don't want to tell him over the phone" I suggest.

"Maybe next weekend?" he checks his calendar on his phone. "I have a couple conference calls scheduled but I can do them from anywhere."

"I will call him later but it should work for me" I agree.

"How do you think he will react?" Christian asks.

"I don't know" I sigh. "I'm sure he won't be happy that his unwed daughter got knocked up-"

"I hate that word…knocked up" Christian grimaces. "And we could easily take care of the unwed issue."

"I…" I gulp in shock at what he is suggesting. "I'm not going to get married just because I'm pregnant."

"I was simply saying we could take care of it" Christian says defensively and I immediately wonder if I disappointed him. He can't possibly be suggesting we get married already; we barely moved in together.

"I'm sure he will be upset at first, but he will come around" I return the conversation to our parents. "What do you think your parents reaction will be?"

"I don't know...besides shock" Christian admits. "I guarantee they won't see this coming that's for sure."

"How about next Friday we tell your family and Saturday we tell my dad? That way they both find out around the same time?" I suggest.

"Sounds good" Christian agrees. "We could take Charlie Tango to visit your dad."

"Charlie Tango?" I ask confused.

"My helicopter, it will take about an hour to get there by air" he explains.

"Of course you have a helicopter" I laugh.

"It's efficient for getting places quickly" he explains simply. "How are you feeling?"

"Much better, my stomach has completely settled" I answer.

"Did you want to call the doctor to make sure everything is okay?" he asks cautiously.

"No, I'm sure it's just a little morning sickness" I assure him.

"You're sure?" he asks.

"Yes, I'm sure" I answer. "Don't worry so much."

"I can't help it, you know how I need to have control over everything" he says. "This is one area I have so little control over…"

"Speaking of control…"I suggest.

"What are you saying?" he asks surprised.

"If I remember right before we left your boat you said we needed to spend some time in the playroom this week…we haven't been in there for some time" I explain.

"Ana….are you sure that's wise?" he asks.

"We both did our research Christian, we both know that we can go in there" I point out.

"I know" he sighs. "I'm just afraid I'll hurt you."

"I trust you Christian" I assure him.

"Tell me why we were supposed to go into the playroom after our trip on the boat" Christian says sternly.

"You were going to remind me who was in charge sir" I answer with my eyes on the floor.

"That's right…what did you try to do on the boat that earned you a trip to the playroom?" he asks.

"I…I tried to top from the bottom sir" I answer.

"That's right you did" he recalls. "Upstairs, in position."

I quickly enter the playroom, strip from my clothes and wait in position on the floor by the door as he requested. I know we are both nervous, but I need to know that we can still have this part of our lives even though I'm pregnant. I need to know we both can get through a scene, especially before the pregnancy progresses. If we can't get through a scene now when my stomach is still flat, how will we be when I'm huge and my belly is in the way? I need this right now just as much as I think Christian needs this as he feels things are out of his control. I hear Christian enter the room, walking around the room slowly but my eyes remain fixed on the floor waiting for his command. A silk blindfold is placed over my eyes as I hear soft music begin playing in the background.

"Do you remember your safewords?" Christian asks.

"Yes sir" I answer quickly.

"If at any time you cannot physical say your safewords I want you to wave your hand up and down or stomp your foot" he instructs.

"Yes sir" I agree.

I hear him walking around the room again, further from me, opening and closing drawers as I wait in anticipation for what he is planning. After what feels like an hour, I finally hear Christian return to my side; he gently guides me into a standing position and leads me across the room.

"I want you to lay across this on your back with your head just off the bench" he puts my hand on the leather bench so I know what he is referring to. "I will help you."

A few minutes later I am lying awkwardly on the leather bench, my legs on either side of the bench just touching the floor so my sex is fully exposed. My head is hanging just off the bench but surprisingly it is not uncomfortable as the side of the bench is actually pretty soft. Christian's hands roam my entire body which is fully on display for him right now. He pauses briefly on my still flat stomach which is when I truly regret the fact that I'm wearing a blindfold. I would love to be able to see him right now to know what he is thinking or what the look in his eyes is. His hands quickly move over the rest of my body, lightly massaging me until he reaches my sensitive nipples which he gently sucks.

"Hmmmmmmmm" I moan.

"Quiet" he instructs.

I hear Christian shuffle around next to me, it sounds as if he is taking his clothes off but I can't be certain. The excitement builds in anticipation of what Christian is planning; being blindfolded and on display for Christian to do whatever he wants with my body arouses me even further.

"Open" Christian gently pulls on my lower jaw.

I immediately comply with his request; I feel Christian step in front of me, straddling my head. His hands gently massage my breasts, my nipples, my stomach, my hips and my thighs completely ignoring my sex. He gently lowers his dick into my mouth as he leans over my body, his chest resting above my stomach as he finally makes contact with my sex. His fingers work their magic on my sex; his fingers run from my ass to my clit as he alternates between tugging at my folds and putting gentle pressure on my clit. I'm struggling to focus and find myself nearly gagging several times as I try to suck on Christian while he brings me just to the edge.

"Hmmmmmmm" I moan around him as I suddenly feel him push something deep inside of me.

"Quiet" he hisses as he taps my sex lightly with his fingers.

My insides clench around the object inside of me as he continues to move it around inside of me. I instantly recognize it as the ben wa balls and my breathing hitches remembering how intensely I have come when we've used them in the past. Christian leans up slowly, pushing himself into me even deeper until he hits the back of my throat. Swallowing in this position is difficult, but I manage which allows him to slide just further into me his balls now resting on my nose. He holds himself there for what feels like several minutes as I try to relax my body and not choke. After some time, he finally moves back but repeats this process several times before finally pulling completely out of my mouth and stepping away from me.

"I'm going to sit you up" he says before gently helping me up so I'm straddling the bench.

"Nod if you are okay to stand up" he instructs; I nod quickly.

Christian leads me around the room, making me walk very slowly several times around the room itself I realize as we pass by the bench for a third time. I'm practically panting now, the balls are moving inside of me, sitting that spot every time I move and it's nearly sending me over the edge. Finally Christian stops and pushes me up against something cold and hard; my arms are quickly bound in front of me around what I've realized is the post of the bed. I feel the bed dip as he sits on it in front of me before he grabs my breasts using them to pull me closer to bedpost. His mouth quickly finds my nipples, sucking hard on them as I struggle to keep the orgasm that is building at bay. I whimper slightly as he attaches a nipple clamp to it before starting to suck hard on the other nipple. Once both nipples are clamped he attaches a chain to them, effectively bonding my breasts around the bedpost.

"Spread your legs….wider….wider" he instructs getting off the bed.

My legs are spread wide, further apart than my shoulders as I wait for Christian to touch me. I can feel his eyes over my body as I sense him standing behind me but he doesn't say anything and doesn't touch me for several minutes.

"Ah!" I gasp as I feel something hit my ass hard.

"Quiet!" he commands as he hits me again, this time I'm expecting it so it doesn't catch me by surprise.

"Do not come" he says as he continues to hit my ass, lower back and thighs.

It's not painful nor is it entirely uncomfortable, but it makes my skin very sensitive. The constant hitting has my body moving back and forth against the bedpost causing the balls inside of me to thrust back and forth and the chain attached to my nipples to be tugged roughly. I'm immediately on the edge, trying everything possible to control the orgasm but I know if he continues at this pace much longer it will be impossible for me to not come.

"Sir….please…." I beg for a release.

"No, not yet" he hits me, slightly harder this time before I hear the flogger hit the floor.

I sigh in relief, either from the sudden pause of the assault on me or from the thought that perhaps he is going to let me come soon. My breath hitches as I feel his fingers spreading the moisture from my now drenched sex to my ass; he doesn't enter me which is what I desperately need right now. I gasp as I feel him pushing something hard and cold into my ass, I slowly pushing back at the object which allows it to more easily slide into me. Christian continues to push the plug into my ass has he plays with my clit roughly until the plug is fully lodged into my ass.

"Your ass is a beautiful shade of pink right now" Christian says as he hits me again,

"Sir….I can't….please" I beg as the balls moving inside of me and the plug are too much.

"Not yet….soon" he promises.

The flogging continues, the pace and force increasing slightly and I find myself moaning loudly desperately needing to find my release. Without warning he reaches into my sex, forcefully pulling the balls from me which immediately sends me over the edge. I scream his name as I finally find the release that has been building for so long. As I finally come down from the orgasm, I feel Christian's body flush against mine, as he unclamps the chain connecting my breasts and releases my wrists.

"Did I tell you to come?" he asks disappointed.

"No sir" I answer.

"Who controls your orgasms?" he demands.

"You sir" I reply.

"You remember what happened last time you came without permission in here" he states rather than asks.

"Yes sir" I recall the memory vividly.

"Tell me what your punishment was" he demands.

"You left the butt plug in me to remind me of who was in charge" I gulp realizing this is likely what is going to happen now.

"That's right" he confirms. "It seems though we also need to work on your orgasm control while we're spending time in here this weekend."

My breath hitches at the thought of my orgasms being withheld repeatedly but I don't say anything. I stand in position waiting for his instruction. He removes the nipple clamps; gently sucking on my nipples as the blood finally begins to recirculate to them. I'm thankful that he did not use the larger clamps which have more of a bite because right now my breasts are so sensitive that I'm not sure how I would have handled it.

"Hold the post, further down" he pauses until I comply. "Do not let go."

"Ahhhhhhhhhh" I scream as he thrusts hard into me.

"Do not come! This is for me only" he pulls all the way out before thrusting into me hard.

It's taking everything in me not to come again as I immediately feel the need building; I'm still sensitive from the orgasm moments ago and now it's combined with him deep inside of me plus the plug moving further in me each time he moves. Just when I think I can't take it any longer Christian finds his release and I immediately feel the warmth throughout my entire body.

"Come clean me" he instructs.

With Christian's hands guiding me, I drop to my knees in front of him and take his still hard erection into my mouth. I taste evidence of our orgasms on him as I gently run my tongue around his softening dick.

"God I've missed having you in here" he moans as he lifts me into a standing position, removing the blindfold from my eyes. "Are you okay? Was I too rough?"

"I'm fine Christian, you were good….really good" I blush.

"You're sure I didn't hurt you?" he asks.

"Christian I'm fine" I assure him.

"Thank you for making me go in there" he says as we eat lunch together after washing up and changing back into our clothes.

"I needed to know that we could still go in there….that even though-" I stutter trying to figure out the words.

"I know" he sighs. "I wasn't sure how I would feel going back in there; I'm still so afraid I'm going to hurt you. I promise I won't be rough with you in there."

"Christian, I don't think you were ever really rough in there" I point out.

"Just promise me you will tell me if I do something to hurt you or that might hurt the baby" he whispers.

"I promise" I kiss him gently. "I still want us to be able to go in there as long as possible. I know once I get bigger it will impact what we can do in there but I still want to try. I think we both enjoy it too much-"

"We both do enjoy it" he smirks. "We will do whatever you're comfortable with when that time comes, but I would like to see if we can't try to spend time in there when we both think we need it."

"I'm feeling really tired, I think I'm going to lay down for a little while" I say putting the dishes in the sink.

"I have some work to do, I'll be in my office. Maybe we can go out for dinner tonight?" he suggests.

"I'd like that" I kiss him before heading upstairs to our bedroom.

With every step I take I'm reminded of the plug still inside of me, which strangely arouses me again. I try to push the thoughts from my mind as I lay in the soft comfortable bed. I'm pleased that even though we were both nervous about going into the playroom since finding out that I'm pregnant that we both enjoyed the experience. I don't know how I would be able to handle it if Christian had said he didn't want to go into the playroom until after the baby was born. It's become such a key part of our relationship that it would feel like something was missing if it we weren't in there at least occasionally. I quickly fall asleep; surprised at how tired I suddenly am even though I slept pretty well last night.

I wake up sometime later, surprised that I actually woke on my own as I certain that Christian would have to wake me up given how tired I was. I feel something between my legs, gently probing my sex and as I reach to move the covers I realize my hands are bound above my head. I gasp as I feel Christian suck hard on my clit as his finger slides deep into me. I find myself climbing as Christian gently tugs on my clit with his teeth causing me to gasp in shock.

"Don't come" he says firmly.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhh" I moan as a second finger joins the first, slowly plunging in and out of me.

"You're so tight and so wet…you're gripping my fingers so tight baby" he moans before his mouth finds my clit again.

"Christian! Ohhhhhhhhhh" I scream as the need becomes too much.

All too quickly, Christian removes his fingers and pulls away from me before releasing my hands. I lay in bed panting from desire, desperate for a release as he climbs off the bed.

"We need to get ready for dinner" he announces.

"Christian….but…." I whine.

"Orgasm control" he reminds me. "Do not touch yourself either; I will know if you come."

"Christian!" I exclaim as he shuts the bathroom door and turns on the shower.

I quickly make my way to the bathroom, before stepping in the shower with him. I know he can't resist me when I'm in here with him-

"It's not going to work Ana" he chastises me as I begin lathering my chest with body wash.

"What's not going to work? I'm simply taking a shower to get ready for dinner" I smile innocently.

"Sure" he smirks.

"Where are we going tonight?" I sigh as he gets out of the shower without touching me.

"Just a small restaurant…where a dress and no underwear" he says.

"Yes sir" I reply and reluctantly dress without panties.

A short time later we arrive at a small Italian restaurant; we are seated in a large corner booth with beautiful views of the lake. While reviewing the menu and several times throughout dinner, Christian's hand finds its way up my dress lightly caressing my sex. I'm thankful for the long table cloth which hangs low so none of the other guests can see what he is doing beneath the table.

"Would you like anything else tonight?" the waitress asks.

"No I think we're good here," Christian gently slips a finger into me. "Ana? Do you need anything?"

"No….I'm….fine" I say breathlessly.

"Very well, I will be back with your bill shortly" she looks at me puzzled but leaves us quickly.

"Christian….please" I whisper.

"Control….Hold back" he nips at my ear before his thumb presses on my clit slightly.

I gasp and just as I think I can't hold back any longer Christian removes his hand from under my dress and finishes his meal. I'm once again left wanting, in desperate need for a release as I drink my cold water trying to relax my body. Christian's hand is once again on me as Taylor drives us home; he keeps me just on edge never really allowing my body to come down from the arousal. The bumps in the road continue to thrust the plug around in me just as Christian slips a finger into me.

"Please" I whisper.

"Soon…" he promises.

Once again just before I am able to find my release, Christian removes his finger from me gently pulling my dress back over my legs. Thankfully Taylor is oblivious to what Christian was just doing but I'm sure if he took one look at me he would know exactly what his boss was doing in the back seat. Christian's punishment for coming without permission is far worse this time than last, as I'm constantly reminded of the punishment throughout the day. I realize this was the intent of Christian's punishment but I have to admit it is by far the longest and most frustrating punishment he has ever inflicted on me. Arriving back at Escala, Christian immediately leads me to our bedroom, his lips crushing against mine before the door is even shut.

"You have no idea how much I wanted you today" he moans as he pulls me against his erection.

"Christian…please…I need you" I beg shamelessly as once again I'm immediately on the edge.

"Tell me…have you learned your lesson?" he asks sternly.

"Yes…today has been torture" I admit.

"How so?" he asks.

"I'm so on edge, so close to coming all day…I can't take it much longer…please Christian" I moan as he slowly removes my dress.

"Are you going to come without permission again?" he asks.

"I'm going to try harder" I promise. "I don't know that I will ever be able to completely withhold it but I will try harder."

"Very good" he smiles.

Our hands are everywhere, mine taking his clothes off and his exploring my body constantly pulling me closer to him. His erection rubs against my sex as I moan loudly desperately grinding myself against him. He leads me to bed where he sits against the headboard, pulling me so I straddle his legs, his erection just at my opening as he holds me above him. He pulls my arms back onto the bed further, closer to his knees as he gently lowers me onto him, his eyes on our connection the entire time.

"Ohhhhhhhhh" I moan as I take him almost halfway in and feel very full as the plug moves within me.

"So tight…deeper….I want to see you take all of me" he pulls my hips down further.

"Ahhhhhhhh….too much" I cringe as I feel myself stretching around him, trying to accommodate him.

"You look so hot right now" his thumb gently applies pressure to my clit as his other hand pinches my nipple. "Watching you take me all in like this….so beautiful….so fucking hot."

"Christian!" I gasp loudly as he thrusts himself completely into me.

The incredible feeling of fullness is overwhelming, the pain/pleasure combination has me desperately on the edge a place I have been multiple times throughout the day today. Christian pulls me against him, as he holds my hips tightly moving me up and down against him seeking his own release. I can't move right now, I'm too overwhelmed with sensations to even coordinate any movements.

"Come Ana" Christian finally commands.

"CHRISTIAN! OH MY…..AHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream as the long awaited orgasm finally rips through me.

As Christian continues to move my body against him, the orgasm just doesn't seem to stop. My entire body is shaking as the he continues to rub against my g spot every time he pulls me down on him. His breathing is has heavy as mine is right now, his movements just as erratic as the need clearly becomes too much for him.

"Fuck…Ana!" he screams as I feel him pour himself into me, thrusting himself deeper inside of me.

I whimper as he pulls me against him, the orgasm finally ending and my body slowly begins to feel like mine once again. Christian's hands are gently massaging my shoulders, my back and finally my ass which still has the plug lodged deep into it. This is one punishment I can't say I will forget anytime soon as we climb into bed, quickly falling asleep in each other's arms.

_Author's Note 2: The next chapter will entail sharing the news with their families. How do you think both families will react? _


	32. Chapter 32

_Author's Note: The last chapter received a lot of feedback, both positive and negative. I wanted to thank each of you for your reviews, I read every one of them and appreciate your honesty. _

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 32 APOV:**

I wake up the next morning to Christian's mouth on my very sensitive nipples, sucking and nipping at them as his fingers gently stroke my sex. This man's sex drive is truly amazing, he always seems ready to go no matter how recently we've had sex. Yesterday he managed to keep me on edge almost the entire day before finally letting me find my release just before we went to bed. As surprised as I am at his sex drive, I find my own body quickly responding to Christian. The orgasm last night provided me the much needed release that I was waiting all day for but I don't know if it completely satisfied me. Judging by the gush of excitement I just felt between my legs, I'm going to say that it didn't.

"Don't come…." Christian mumbles as he nips my nipple with his teeth.

"Ahhhhh!" I moan, the slight pain going straight to my sex.

"We still have some work to do, don't we?" he slips a finger inside me.

"Please….I promise….I learned my lesson," I beg as he curls his finger hitting that magical spot deep within me.

"What lesson would that be?" He asks.

"I won't come without permission, I swear" I moan, desperately trying to hold back the orgasm.

"Don't come" he pulls the plug from me suddenly.

"Yes…sir…." I pant feeling both relieved and disappointed that the plug was removed.

"You look so beautiful right now; your cheeks are flushed, your nipples so hard, your pussy dripping with desire " he lays himself between my legs, his erection just at my opening.

"Please…." I beg, desperate with need.

"Remember" he thrusts hard into me, "Don't come."

"UGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH" I scream out as he slams himself into me hard, my body stretching around him.

"God you're so tight…." he says through gritted teeth.

"Yes…." I moan.

"Do you want to come?" he asks.

"Yes sir! Yes sir!" I scream as he thrusts hard into me.

"Oh God!" he screams moments later, slamming deep and hard into me as he finds his release.

I whimper as he continues to move slowly within me, leaving me desperately on the edge yet again. I thought he was going to let me come; I try to calm my body down as I realize this is likely not going to happen. He rolls us over so I am on top of him, our connection still intact as he kisses me passionately. His tongue thrusts into my mouth, mimicking the movements on my sex only moments ago. I moan realizing it's going to be impossible to come down if he continues to keep doing this. Christian gently urges me to sit up; he pushes my hips down against him forcing himself deeper inside of me.

"Ahhhhhhhh" I gasp as he sinks deeper into me.

"Do you want to come?" he asks.

"Please sir….If you think I should" I beg, giving myself completely to him.

"Very good" he sounds pleased and I immediately realize this is what he wanted me to say earlier. As a sub it is not my place to ask for a release, to demand an orgasm; the orgasm remains in the hands of the dominant at all times.

"Ride me" he instructs.

My body immediately tenses knowing that any movement right now will push me closer to the edge, I don't know that I can hold back the orgasm that is quickly threatening to take over. Putting my hands on his chest, I slowly begin moving myself up and down on him, enjoying the exquisite feeling him sliding in and out of me. His hands are firm on my hips but he is letting me control the pace, almost as if he knows that if I start moving too much right now it will push me over the edge. It is only now that I truly realize my transgression yesterday in the playroom; by coming without his permission I essentially took that control away from him. His punishment of keeping me on edge combined with the plug in me yesterday and this morning was a constant reminder of why I first went to the club in Taiwan – I needed to give someone complete control over my body including my orgasms. I desperately try to keep this in mind as Christian begins thrusting his hips upward, pushing himself deeper into me each time I slide back down against him.

"Come Ana!" Christian commands.

"OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH GOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!" I scream as the release that has been building finally takes over.

I swear I lose all sense of reality, I can't feel anything but pure bliss as my walls grip Christian tightly not wanting him to pull out. I don't know why but this orgasm feels different, it's as if it's coming from deeper inside of me…I can only assume it's because of the build up of the release. As I slowly begin to come down from the orgasm, I feel Christian pulling me down against him, my chest against his as he slams hard into me. He holds my hips up as he continues thrusting in and out of me and I immediately find myself once again on the edge. I don't think the last orgasm ended before this one threatens to take over. I'm panting and moaning heavily, desperately trying not to come as Christian continues thrusting hard in and of me.

"Come with me ANA!" Christian screams as I feel him swell deep inside of me.

"Yes! OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! YES!" I scream as the second orgasm in minutes rips through my body. Christian's hands relax and I immediately find myself rocking against him, prolonging the orgasm even more as it doesn't seem to end. I actually moan in disappointment as I feel Christian soften inside of me.

"You wanted to come again?" he smirks.

"I don't know why, but yes" I blush deeply.

"Later….I think your body needs a rest" he laughs.

"I'm sorry" I whisper as I kiss his neck.

"For?" he asks.

"For coming without permission in the playroom yesterday" I say. "I'm supposed to give you complete control when we're in there and I didn't, I realize that now."

"Good" he sighs. "Then the punishment was effective."

"I don't want another punishment like this" I whine.

"Next time don't come" he says simply.

"I'll try harder" I say.

"I love you" he whispers gently pulling me off of him.

"I love you too" I moan.

"Let's take a shower and get some breakfast, I'm sure you're hungry" he suggests.

"Actually not really" I admit.

"You have to eat something, even just something small" he reminds me sternly.

"I will" I sigh.

The rest of the weekend passes by quickly, we don't return to the playroom but we spend a lot of time in our bedroom making up for earlier in the week. We also finalize our plans to visit our parents this weekend; Grace has to work on Friday and invites us to a family dinner on Sunday but my dad is available on Saturday. Our plan is to fly to my dad's on Saturday morning, spend the day with him and then fly back Saturday evening. Sunday night will be dinner with Christian's family, although we're not entirely sure who is going to be there yet.

As the week progresses I become more and more nervous about telling my dad; I'm not as nervous about telling Christian's family but since my dad hasn't yet Christian it just makes me even more nervous. Even if emotionally, I'm a wreck thinking of how my dad will react, physically I'm feeling pretty well. Thankfully I haven't thrown up since the morning Gail tried to serve me eggs; I've had small bouts of nausea here and there but nothing substantial. Christian and I are keeping the pregnancy a secret as long as possible; even after we announce it to our families we want to prolong the media knowing as long as possible. There have been a few calls by reporters to our offices and once or twice someone tried to enter GEH without an appointment but the paparazzi has pretty much left as alone. We are both nervous that once they learn of my pregnancy they will be all over us again which obviously poses safety concerns for both me and the baby. Christian's concern is that someone will try to kidnap me and hold me for ransom. Although I have plenty of money, Christian obviously has much more than I do and therefore they are likely to go after him for the ransom. Sawyer is with me at all times and Christian recently said he is considering a second female security member once the press learns of my pregnancy for extra caution.

I'm really pleased that Christian is doing so well with the unexpected news that I was pregnant. We haven't talked much about what will happen when the baby is born, but he is taking it in strides. At some point we will discuss the nursery I'm sure, but there is a guest bedroom right next to Christian's room that I think would be perfect for a nursery plus it being so close to us is a bonus. Christian and I have both spent some time reading books that we ordered online, comparing the advice in each one. Most of the books say the exact same thing so we probably only needed one book instead of the seven combined books that we ordered. Christian surprised me the other night by showing me a book he ordered which clearly describes, with pictures, the best positions to have sex in as the pregnancy progresses. He even pointed out several positions that he thought I would find most pleasurable!

Friday finally arrives and my nerves are worse than they have been all week; I'm stressed out at work and find myself snapping over the smallest things. I'm sure this is largely due to the anticipation of telling my dad about the baby tomorrow, but no matter what I can't seem to stop thinking that he is going to be angry and disappointed in me.

"Ms. Steele?" Sawyer knocks at my door.

"What?" I snap.

"Mr. Grey would like to know if you've had lunch yet?" he asks.

"Tell Mr. Grey that I will eat when I feel like it" I reply angrily.

"Yes ma'am" He quickly closes the door as he leaves my office.

I immediately feel bad that I snapped at Sawyer; there was really no good reason for that. For all I know Christian had him ask me in case I wanted to join him for lunch. I sigh and quickly eat the lunch that Gail packed me; had Sawyer not mentioned it I probably would have gone much longer without eating. I have found that eating frequent smaller meals helps my stomach not get upset and right now it's been several hours since I've eaten. The rest of my day is filled with meetings and conference calls, none of which can hold my interest for very long. Several times during the meeting I had to excuse myself and leave the room just to get my mind back on track. I know this can't continue much longer or it will begin to affect my ability to run the company productively. Thankfully it is Friday; I can only hope that once I tell my dad and Christian's parents that I will find it much easier to concentrate next week. I text Sawyer around six letting him know that I'm ready to go home.

"Sawyer, I'm sorry I snapped at you earlier today" I say as we drive back to Escala.

"It's okay ma'am" he replies.

"No it wasn't, I shouldn't have taken my frustration out on you" I say.

"Don't worry about it" he says.

As I sit in the great room waiting for Christian, I desperately wish I could have a glass of wine to calm my nerves. Sadly, alcohol is obviously off the table for several more months yet so I'm stuck with this glass of water.

"How was your day sweetie?" Christian asks.

"Busy" I grumble. "Stressful."

"Why was it stressful?" he asks.

"I think it's just my nerves" I explain.

"Why don't we go take a hot bath and you can tell me about it?" he suggests.

"No," I sigh. "It's not going to help. We've been talking about it all week and I'm still nervous as hell. I'm so afraid of what my dad's reaction is going to be. What if he's mad at me? What if he's disappointed in me? What if he's angry? What if he doesn't want to be a grandfather?"

"Ana, do you really think he would respond like that?" Christian asks.

"I don't know!" I exclaim.

"I'm sure he wouldn't," Christian tries to reassure me.

"That's the problem! You don't know him! You've never met him….he's never met you! You can't say how he is going to react!" I yell.

"Ana, calm down…let's sit down and talk about it" Christian suggests.

"No! We've done nothing but talk all week and it's not helping! I just need to get this fucking over with" I sigh.

"Ana, I'm sure this stress isn't good for the baby" he points out.

"I know" I agree. "I just can't stop thinking about how he will react."

"I want you upstairs, in position in five minutes" Christian says sternly a few minutes later.

"Wait? What?" I ask surprised.

"Are you questioning me?" he stands straight up, shoulders back and head high clearly in full dom mode.

"No sir" I mumble and slowly walk up the steps.

I'm purposely going slow, entering the playroom with only a minute to spare. The usual excitement I feel when I enter this room is missing, I sigh and begin to undress as Christian requested. I don't know why he thinks I'm in the mood to play right now, we still need to prepare for our trip tomorrow, talk about what we're going to say to my dad…hell we haven't even eaten dinner yet!

"You're not in position Ms. Steele" Christian says walking into the room as I remove my bra.

"Sorry sir" I say, my voice full of sarcasm.

_Wack_

"Ow!" I exclaim in reaction to the swat across my ass that Christian's hand just delivered.

"Lose the attitude" he instructs.

"Yes sir" I mumble.

"Go to the spanking bench…you've earned yourself a punishment for the attitude" he says.

I don't say anything but make my way to the leather bench as he instructed; I bend myself over it, my sensitive nipples lay against the cool leather.

"I don't think we will be needing these" he rips my panties off, tossing them to the floor. "I want you to count; we will stop at 10."

_Wack_

"One" I call out as the first slap of his hand comes down.

"Tell me why I'm doing this" he demands.

"Two….Three" his hand comes down quickly. "Because I gave you an attitude for making me come in here."

"Four! Five! Six!" I scream as they come down slightly harder.

"Try again…why am I doing this?" he asks.

"Seven! Eight!" I cry out. "Because I was disrespectful."

"Very good" he acknowledges.

"Nine! Ohhhhhhhhh. Ten!" I scream as the last smack comes down harder than the earlier one.

"On your knees" he demands.

I immediately comply, my ass burning as it rubs against my feet; I can only imagine how red it is right now. Christian leaves my site, but I keep my eyes fixed on the floor in position waiting for him to return. A few minutes later, Christian returns now completely undressed; he pulls my mouth open and thrusts his dick into me deeply immediately hitting the back of my throat causing me to gag. His hand is firm on the back of my head, holding me in place as I'm forced to swallow around him.

"Suck me" he instructs as his grip loosens on my head, allowing me to control the pace.

"I want you to listen to me but don't stop" he says. "I understand you're nervous about tomorrow, but you can't be this stressed out. Everything in the books I've read says stress during pregnancy is not healthy; our jobs have enough stress in them, telling your father that you're pregnant shouldn't add to it. The reason you said you became interested in BDSM was to give complete control over to someone when you felt your world was out of control. Isn't that right?"

"Hmmmmmmm" I moan in agreement as I continue to suck on him.

"Next time you feel this stressed out, I want you to ask for a scene" he says. "I should have realized you needed one but you should have asked as well. This cannot happen again; if work is stressing you out during the day, I want you to come see me at the office. We can easily improvise and have a scene in my office. Understood?"

"Yes sir" I answer as he barely pulls out of me long enough for me to answer before he thrusts back into me.

"Good, now make me come" he demands.

He pulls my head against him, pushing himself once again to the back of my throat. This time I'm expecting it and I don't gag, instead I swallow around him allowing him to slip deeper into me. He groans in response to this and I immediately find myself relaxing knowing that I'm pleasing him. Right now my focus is on him and his needs, long gone are the worries about telling my dad tomorrow. I immediately regret the attitude I gave Christian about coming in here; I need to remember that he knows what I need even if I don't always recognize the need.

"That's it…oh…..don't stop" Christian moans as he starts thrusting into me quicker.

Christian is barely pulling back before he thrusts back into me; I've given up trying to control the pace as he is practically holding my head in place as he tries to find his own release. I moan and swallowing around him as I feel him swell in my mouth just as his breath hitches.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh…Yes…..that's it…" he moans as he thrusts one final time deeper into me than before, immediately I feel the warmth spread down my throat.

With him this deep inside of me, I have no choice but to swallow around him, taking in everything he has to offer. He continues to try to thrust deeper into me as he rides out his orgasm; once he finally stops coming he pulls back slightly allowing me to catch my breath as I gentle lick him clean. I feel him beginning to soften in my mouth as he pulls me against him once again, only this time he doesn't reach the back of my throat when I take him all in.

"Do you have anything to say?" Christian asks as he pulls out of me.

"I'm sorry for my attitude sir" I say guiltily.

"Go to the bed, on your knees facing the couch" he instructs.

I immediately comply with his request, my breath hitching as I remember the last time I was in this position. He quickly sits on the couch in front of me, his eyes roaming my entire body as I quickly feel the need building inside of me just from him looking at me and anticipating what he is going to ask me to do.

"Pinch those beautiful nipples" he instructs.

I hands quickly go to my breasts, my fingers lightly pinching my sensitive nipples as he requested.

"Don't stop….get them nice and hard" he says.

"Hmmmmm" I whimper loudly as I feel my nipples harden under my fingers. They are so sensitive right now….even wearing rough fabric makes them ache right now. I've read that they would become sensitive but I never imagined it would be to this degree. The books say it will probably last a few more weeks but I just wish it would stop now!

"Attach this" he hands me a nipple clamp, climbing on the bed behind me.

"Owwww!" I gasp as I put the first one.

"Breath….you can take it" he whispers into my ear as he gives me another clamp.

"Ouch" I whimper as I put the second one on, the sting much less than the first one.

"Good girl" he compliments. "Now play with your clit."

Breathing heavily through the discomfort of my nipples, my hand slowly makes its way to between my legs finding the surprisingly hard little bud of my sex. I am truly surprised to find my sex drenched in excitement despite the pain of the nipple clamps.

"I don't think I need to remind you not to come without permission, do I?" he asks.

"No sir" I moan.

"Lay on your back in the center of the bed" he instructs before leaving the bed to go the chest of drawers against the wall. "Don't stop playing with that sweet clit…I want you right on the edge…."

"Yes…sir…." I pant as I move into the center of the bed as he said, my fingers remain firm on my clit, playing with it just like Christian does so often.

I close my eyes as the need builds; my knees are bent and legs spread wide open inviting Christian in. Even though we had sex last night, my body is desperate with need as if I haven't had sex in ages. I can't help but wonder if it will always be like this with Christian? Will I always want him so badly? Will our connection always be so strong?

"You're thinking too much" he joins me on the bed, this time at the bottom, between my legs.

"Sorry sir" I moan as he pulls my hand down further, slipping my own finger inside of me.

"Maybe this will keep your mind on task" he thrusts my finger in and out of me, pushing me closer to the edge. "Don't stop."

I vaguely feel Christian climb off the bed, moving around the room; my eyes are closed tightly as I desperately try to control the orgasm that is quickly building. After my last punishment, I am determined to not come without Christian's permission. My finger slides easily in and out of my throbbing sex; it's not enough to send me over the edge but it's just enough to keep me on edge.

"Without stopping lift your hips up as high as you can" Christian instructs.

Glancing towards him I cannot see what he has in his hands, with a quick pointed look from him I immediately comply with his request raising my hips off the bed as high as I can. He climbs on the bed, positioning himself between my legs and wraps an arm around my waist pulling me even higher off the bed. He quickly positions an odd shaped pillow under my lower back so that my sex is raised above while my legs are positioned just over the edge of the pillow putting my sex on full display for him. If it wasn't so turned on right now I would be embarrassed; although with as many times as he has put me in a similar position where I have been on display for him you would think I wouldn't be as embarrassed any longer.

"You look so hot like this" Christian moves above me, his erection rubbing against my hand as he grasps my breasts firmly.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh" I moan.

"Put another finger in your tight pussy" he instructs.

I whimper as I comply with his request, another fingers sliding easily into my soaking sex pushing me that much closer to the edge. I close my eyes tightly, watching Christian watching me right now is too much. My body is desperate with need but the fact that I am not controlling my own orgasms right now is reassuring. With as stressed out as I have been this week with the thought of telling my father about the baby, being here right now and giving Christian complete control over everything is just what I needed. This right now is the exact reason I became interested in BDSM in the first place; I need someone to take over when things become too much for me. Christian was right though, I should have told him I needed to come in here.

"God….your juices are sliding down your ass…it's so hot" he moans, sitting back so he can watch me closely.

"Christian…please….sir…" I beg.

"Not yet…hold it for me" he requests.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh" I moan loudly as Christian slips a small, cool object under my hand so it rests directly on my clit and starts vibrating.

"Don't drop it or you won't come all weekend" he warns.

"Please….too much….." I pant as the need quickly overwhelms me.

"Fuck your pussy hard like I do" he orders.

"Oh God! Christian! I need to come!" I scream as my fingers thrust hard in and out of me.

"Come ANA! Let me see that sweet pussy come with your fingers deep inside of you" he orders.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream out as Christian takes over the movements of my fingers; I'm too overcome with sensations to even coordinate my own movements.

Christian quickly pulls my fingers from my sex, replacing them immediately with his hard erection causing me to scream in surprise as I can already feel the next orgasm building even though this one hasn't ended yet. He's thrusting into me hard and deep, giving me exactly what I needed as he takes full control over my body.

"So tight….so beautiful….so hot….you look gorgeous with my cock buried in you" he moans as he watches himself thrust in and out of me.

"Please….so close….sir" I beg.

"You're going to tell me the next time you need to come in here aren't you?" he thrusts harder into me.

"Yes sir!" I exclaim as he rubs that wonderful spot deep inside of me.

"You can come when I do" he bends down, putting additional pressure on my clit pushing me near the edge of my breaking point as the need completely takes over.

"CHRISTIAN!" I scream as he releases the nipple clamps.

"Now!" he commands as I feel him thrust deeper into me just before he finds his release.

"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH GOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!" I scream as the much needed orgasm finally finds me.

Christian gently lifts me up and places me against him, so I'm straddling him with our connection still intact. I rest my head against his shoulder as I desperately try to calm my breathing back down and relax my body against his. Christian's hands are wrapped around my waist, holding me close against him as I feel his breathing slowly begin to return to normal.

"Do you feel better?" Christian asks.

"Yes, thank you" I smile against him.

"How about we go eat and head to bed?" he suggests.

Instead of putting my clothes back on, Christian hands me the silk robe that is always in this room and leads me downstairs. Gail and Taylor must have retired to their apartment as the main floor is quiet as we sit and enjoy a dish of still warm homemade macaroni and cheese. As we finish dinner, I'm feeling very tired which has become pretty typical for me this week right around this time every night. Christian and I fell asleep in each other's arms and we both sleep very soundly as we have most nights since I moved in with Christian.

The next morning arrives quickly and almost immediately my stomach is in knots, again worried about my dad's reaction to the news that he is going to be a grandfather. I wouldn't be surprised if he demanded Christian marry me just because of the baby. As much as I would love to marry Christian someday, I know that we're not there yet and I don't want to get married only because I'm pregnant. I can't see a future without Christian especially now that we are tied together forever by a child but I want it to happen naturally, without the force of our parents.

"Are you ready?" Christian asks as we finish our breakfast.

"Yes….no…..as ready as I'll ever be I guess," I sigh.

"No matter what, it will be okay" he kisses me deeply as we ride the elevator up to the roof.

As we walk onto the roof, before us is a very large black helicopter which immediately causes my jaw to drop. I knew Christian had a helicopter but seeing it firsthand is something else. He quickly straps me into my seat and places large headphones on my head which allow me to hear Christian reviewing the take-off procedures. After a few minutes I feel the helicopter begin to leave the roof of Escala, slowly making our way above the building and I watch in awe as everything gets smaller. We slowly leave Seattle, with Christian pointing out several key parts of the city as we go. I'm truly amazed that Christian has the power and knowledge to fly something like this. I watch everything he does in in awe until the moment we touch down in Portland on a roof of another building. The trip was so much faster flying than it is driving I realize as I check my watch. Christian leads me by the hand down the steps, to the elevator and out the door of beautiful hotel where Taylor is waiting for us with Christian's black SUV.

"Why didn't we just drive down with Taylor?" I ask.

"Because flying is faster," he explains. "Besides, I liked having you with me."

Taylor drives through the city of Portland and along several back roads before we reach my dad's modest home which is far enough from the city that you feel almost alone but close enough should you need anything. Christian squeezes my hand reassuring before he takes my hand assisting me out of the SUV. My parents divorced when I was young, my dad bought this place a few years later when he was tired of living in an apartment in the city. I lived with my mom mostly after the divorce but eventually asked to move back with my dad when I was fifteen after my mom remarried. Her new husband and I didn't exactly see eye to eye; I don't think he was the type of man who ever thought he would marry someone who had a child. He always treated me as if I was a bother and interfered with his plans. Surprisingly my mom didn't argue when I asked to move in with my dad, she all too quickly called and arranged everything with him. I lived in this house until I went to college but it truly was the only place that felt like home.

"You okay?" Christian whispers we approach the front of the house.

"Yes," I reply in a shaky voice.

"Annie! It's so good to see you!" Dad hugs me tightly as we walk through the door.

"Daddy, I missed you" I admit, until now never realizing how much even though I saw him not that long ago.

"You must be Christian, my daughter has told me so much about you" my dad says as he finally pulls away.

"Mr. Steele, it's very nice to meet you sir" Christian shakes his hand.

"Please, call me Ray" dad says. "Let's sit out on the back deck and chat. Christian would you like a beer?"

"Yes, sir….thank you" Christian says surprised.

"Annie…what would you like?" he asks.

"Just a bottle of water is fine Dad," I answer.

Christian and I make our way to the deck off the back of the house that overlooks the decent size yard. There are several chairs, a fire pit and a grill set up; even though my dad doesn't entertain much he enjoys spending a lot of time out here. I remember when he built the deck onto the house a few years ago when I was in New York; he would email me pictures almost every day when he completed another step. He refused to hire someone to help him with it, he did everything by himself.

"So Christian, my daughter tells me you run a very successful business" dad begins.

"Yes sir" Christian admits. "I have been very fortunate that Grey Enterprise Holdings has done very well since I started the company several years ago. We have a variety of companies under our umbrella including several in the technology realm. Our latest acquisition though is a company that is focused on developing portable solar panels that can be used in small places."

"That's very impressive" Dad smiles.

"Thank you sir" Christian blushes slightly, which surprises me because I've never seen Christian blush.

"And you two are now living together I understand?" Dad asks a few minutes later.

"Yes sir" Christian answers. "My apartment has the highest security features possible; I believe Ana is safer at my apartment than in her own."

"Well given everything that happened with that Hyde jerk I would have to agree with you that her apartment isn't very safe," Dad agrees.

"My apartment encompasses the top two floors of our building therefore the elevator can access my floor with a key code combination," Christian explains.

"That was not the case with Ana's apartment right?" Dad asks.

"Yes, while her floor was also passcode protected the floor was shared by another resident which increased the risk" Christian answers. "My apartment also has security cameras in all common areas with a clear view of all exits and entrances."

"That was something her apartment lacked, or this Hyde person would have been caught sooner" Dad points out.

"Yes, that's true," Christian agrees.

As Christian and my dad review various security measures I sit back and just watch as they both discuss other ways to protect me. My dad even warns Christian that I can be defiant and not always listen to rules even when they're meant to keep me safe. Christian smirks at me and tells my dad that he will insure that I comply with all security measures. The way they are talking it's as if I'm not even in the room and that they don't really care about my opinion on safety.

"Daddy…Christian and I have something we would like to tell you," I say as a break in the conversation finally presents an opportunity to tell my dad our news.

"Oh?" He looks at both of us surprised, clearly thinking this visit was just to introduce Christian.

"Daddy," I take a deep breath, bracing myself. "I'm pregnant."

"WHAT?" he screams. "You got my daughter pregnant?"

"Sir, please I want you to know that I have every intention on providing for everything your daughter and our child need. I fully intend to be there every step of the way," Christian tries to assure him.

"Damn straight you will! I expect you to marry my daughter before this baby is born!" Dad exclaims.

"Daddy-" I begin.

"Don't Daddy me! This man should make an honest woman out of my daughter; it's the least he can do!" Dad yells.

"Sir, Ana and I have spoken about marriage but we don't believe that we should get married only because she is pregnant," Christian explains.

"But it's okay to get her pregnant? To have her move in with you? This isn't something you can just throw money at and make it go away – this is a child!" Dad screams.

"Sir, I have no intention of making Ana or our baby go away," Christian assures him. "I will be there every step of the way, at every doctor's appointment, for every craving, for every midnight feeding, for anything that she needs."

"Daddy, it's okay…I'm okay" I smile gently.

"I always wanted you to get married before you had a baby Annie," he sighs. "To truly know someone before you took this big step with them. You have no idea the amount of stress having a baby can put on a relationship, especially one has new as yours."

"I know Daddy" I hug him tightly, not knowing what to say because what he is saying is very true.

"How about some burgers and dogs? You must be hungry," Dad storms off into the kitchen without waiting for our reply.

"That went…." Christian whispers.

"Yeah….it just went," I sigh.

"I'm sure he'll cool down when he has had some time to process it all," Christian says hopefully.

"I suppose" I say.

Dad prepares our dinner on the grill; Christian tries to help where he can but considering the man can barely heat up leftovers there isn't much he can do. Any talk about the baby and our future together is avoided; instead the conversations flow around my dad's business and local sports. I can see the tension slowly easing but as we leave for the night it's still ever present.

"If you need anything…you call me…I don't care what time of the night it is," Dad whispers hugging me tightly. "I love you baby girl."

"I love you too Daddy" I gush.

"Christian, if you ever hurt my daughter or my grandchild I will personally hunt you down and destroy everything you have worked towards. No amount of security will be able to protect you" he warns.

"Understood sir" Christian gulps.

Taylor drives us back to Seattle; Christian explains that since he was drinking with my dad he asked Taylor to arrange for another pilot to return the helicopter to Seattle earlier today. The ride back to Seattle is quiet, I think today was a very emotional day for both of us. All in all I have to admit my dad's reaction wasn't that far from what I expected. I knew he wouldn't be happy but I also knew that he wouldn't disown me or anything crazy like that. Now we just need to get through telling Christian's family our news…

_Author's Note 2: how do you think Ray reacted? Was it what you expected? _


	33. Chapter 33

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

_Author's Note: I am not going to address each of the "guest" reviews that were left on my last chapter, but I wanted to remind everyone that Ana has safe words that she can use. At no time during the scene, did she feel like she needed to use them or she would have. She has said several times that when she feels stressed out that she often needs a scene, that is exactly what Christian gave her in the last chapter. She was not "punished" for being nervous about telling her dad she was pregnant, Christian was giving her what he felt she needed at the time. I am sorry to hear that some of you are not enjoying the story any longer, but ask that you try to stick it out at least for a few more chapters. There have been several comments questioning whether or not Christian truly loves Ana; I assure you he does. Right now it may not be clear to you or to either of them just how much he loves her but in time you will see how this changes. As the title of this story suggests, they are exploring their relationship including all aspects of it. _

_This chapter is shorter than normal...but I wanted to break it here given some things that are going to happen in the next chapter._

**Chpt. 33 APOV:**

"Good Morning baby," Christian wakes me with soft kisses on my lips the next morning.

"Too early," I moan.

"It's almost noon, you have to wake up if we're ever going to make it to dinner tonight," Christian points out.

"Noon?" I ask shocked that I slept so late.

"Yes, I've been up for a few hours getting some work done-" he says.

"I can't believe you let me sleep until noon!" I interrupt.

"You were tired and needed your sleep, why wouldn't I let you sleep?" he laughs.

"I can't remember the last time I slept so late! I need to send a few emails before getting ready to go to your parents for dinner," I explain.

"Come, let's eat and then you can tackle your emails," Christian smiles.

"Why are you so happy this morning?" I grumble as Gail sets two plates of grilled chicken salad in front of us.

"Why shouldn't I be? Your dad didn't kill me yesterday and he was the person I feared telling the most," he explains.

"Really? I'm just as worried about telling your parents," I confess.

"My family likes you, don't worry. They will be surprised I'm sure but I don't think you have anything to worry about," Christian tries to assure me.

"I hope you're right," I sigh.

After breakfast I take a shower and then Christian and I spend a few hours responding to emails. We have a few authors getting ready to go on small book tours so I have a couple of the senior editors at SIP putting in extra hours to insure everything is perfect. In reviewing all the emails it seems as if they have most of it under control, just a few random questions that I need to respond to as well as sign off on a few purchase requisitions. After a quick shower, Christian and I are on our way to his parent's house for dinner and to reveal our big news. The calm, reassuring Christian from earlier is gone; he is replaced with a tense and although he won't admit it very nervous Christian.

"Are you okay?" I ask.

"Fine," he answers shortly.

"Can I do anything?" I ask.

"No," he sighs but squeezes my hand tightly.

"Christian, Ana….it's so wonderful to see you both again!" Grace greets us at the door when we arrive a few minutes later.

"It's wonderful to see you again Grace, thank you for having us for dinner," I hug her.

"When Christian called and asked if we could have a family dinner this weekend there was no way I could say no," she says suspiciously.

"Mom, how are you?" Christian kisses her on both cheeks.

"I'm great dear, how are you?" she asks concerned.

"Christian! Ana!" Mia screams as she races down the steps spotting us.

"Hi Mia!" I laugh at her excitement.

Grace ushers us into the great room where Carrick, Elliot and Kate are already seated. The guys are talking about some game that was on last night while Kate looks bored out of her mind. Christian goes to join the conversation with his dad and brother while I sit next to Kate.

"Hi Ana!" Kate exclaims.

"Not wanting to talk about sports I see?" I ask.

"I don't even know what sport they are talking about!" she exclaims. "Elliot was talking about it all the way here and hasn't stopped since we arrived! It's like they forget there are other things going on right now!"

"Oh? Like what things?" I giggle.

"Well….I….something!" she stutters as we both laugh.

"How are things with you and Elliot?" I ask quietly.

"Good, we're really good," she smiles. "I think we might be moving in together soon."

"Really?" I ask.

"We've been talking about it a lot lately but neither of us has asked the other yet," she explains. "How are things with Christian?"

"Well you know we're living together now," I remind her. "It's been a really easy transition thankfully. And we moved SIP to Christian's building so we can have better security."

"You must get to see him a lot," she says.

"Not as much during the day as you would think," I explain. "We both have pretty busy schedules but we have had lunch together a couple times."

"Everyone, if you will make your way to the dining room dinner is ready," Grace announces.

Christian waits for me before we take our seats at the table surrounded by his family. Grace and Carrick are each at an end, Elliot and Kate are across from us and Mia is seated next to Christian. Dishes of food are slowly passed around the table; lasagna, fresh garlic bread, mixed vegetables and a side salad all make their way around. Thankfully nothing seems to trigger my nausea; it seems that is reserved mostly for eggs lately. There is are glasses of wine and water in front of each person; I have to remind myself each time I reach for a drink to take the glass of water as it's almost second nature to grab the wine glass.

"Everyone….Ana and I have something we would like to share," Christian takes a deep breath while squeezing my hand. "We recently learned that Ana is pregnant and we are expecting our first child in early April."

"Oh! I'm so happy for you both!" Grace gushes.

"I'm going to be an Aunt! Do you know what you're having yet? When can I start shopping?" Mia asks excitedly.

"Congratulations guys!" Elliott exclaims.

"How wonderful Ana!" Kate runs around the table to hug me tightly.

"How are you feeling Ana?" Grace asks everyone finally stops talking.

"Good….a little tired, but overall still pretty good," I answer.

"As long as eggs aren't served for breakfast," Christian laughs.

"Oh don't remind me," I moan.

"Poor Gail, she made over easy eggs one morning which made Ana run straight for the bathroom!" Christian explains.

"Oh dear," Grace laughs.

"Mom, the baby is due right around your birthday," Christian points out.

"It's a perfect time to have the baby….not too cold, not too hot," Grace jokes trying to hide the tears that formed when she realized what Christian said.

After dinner everyone returns to the great room except for Carrick and Christian; after dinner Carrick asked to talk with Christian in his office saying he needed his advice on something. I didn't think much of it but now I realize that Carrick barely said two words after we shared our news. I didn't want to say anything to Christian but he was the one I was worried the most about out of all of Christian's family. With Carrick being a lawyer, I knew his first thought would be to protect his son as he would assume I was doing this to trap Christian to get to his money. Carrick knows nothing about my own financial situation; I have enough money that I would be able to take care of myself and this baby if Christian were to ever decide that he didn't want to support us not that I think he ever will. The room falls quiet as we hear raised voices come from another part of the house which I can only assume is where Carrick's office is located. It's too far away to hear exactly what they are saying but I can tell both Christian and Carrick are raising their voices. Grace quickly excuses herself to go check on the situation while the rest of us continue talking. Mia rambles on and on about how Mark broke her heart, saying he needs to focus more on his education and has no time for dating right now. I knew by looking at him that it likely wasn't going to last but of course there was no way that I would ever say that to Mia. I could just tell that he couldn't keep up with her.

"Everything okay?" I whisper as Christian sits down next to me on the couch a few minutes later.

"Yes," Christian sighs.

Carrick and Grace return a few minutes later; Carrick and Christian avoid eye contact with each other and the tension in the room can be felt by everyone. Grace does her best to try to lighten the mood as coffee, tea and desert is served. Christian's hand doesn't break contact with me the remainder of the night; he holds my hand, rests his hand on my leg or wraps an arm around my waist protectively. I can tell that whatever Carrick said to him upset him but that he was trying to hide it.

"Do you want to go?" I whisper as everyone has finished desert and the evening is winding down.

"Whenever you're ready," he says.

"I'm ready if you are," I reply.

"Ana and I need to get going as we have early morning appointments to prepare for," Christian announces moments later.

"Thank you both for coming," Grace kisses Christian on the cheek, as she gently squeezes his shoulder.

"Thank you for having us," I say as she hugs me.

"You have no idea how happy you have made us," she whispers and I immediately blush.

The ride back to Escala is quiet; Christian is just staring out the window obviously still upset about whatever Carrick said to him in his office. When we get back to the apartment, Christian storms into his office mumbling something about having to get work done. I don't know if I should try to talk to Christian about it because this far it hasn't gotten me anywhere. I decide to give him some additional time to cool off while I spend some time in the great room catching up on emails and starting a manuscript. I can't seem to concentrate on anything as my mind keeps wondering to what Christian is doing and what he might be thinking. I can only imagine the sort of things that Carrick said, that he might have accused me of considering he is a lawyer. After an hour of not focusing on anything, I decide to take a long hot bath. When the tub fills up, I light a few candles and snap a picture before sending it to Christian.

_Join me? –A_

I don't wait for a response, but turn off the lights and climb into the large soaking tub letting my head rest against the back of the tub as my eyes close. A few minutes later, I hear Christian come into the bathroom but I don't say anything. Without a word between us, he strips out of his clothes and climbs into the tub urging me to sit up so he can squeeze behind me. My back rests against his chest, my head on his shoulder as his arms wrap around me holding me close to him. I can feel the tension in his body and as much as I want to ask him what Carrick said that bothered him so much I think right now he just needs this. We sit like this for some time before Christian takes the bath poof and begins gently washing me.

"He had me so fucking mad tonight, if it wasn't for you I would have left long before we did," Christian says quietly.

I don't say anything, not wanting to push him if he isn't ready or doesn't want to talk about it. I wrap my arms around his, silently letting him know I'm here if he wants to continue.

"He had the fucking nerve to suggest I demand you get a paternity test done on the baby….that I don't know what your intentions are…that you are just trying to trap me to get to my money," Christian grimaces.

"Oh baby," I sigh. "I'm so sorry he said those things to you."

"It wasn't what he said, rather what he insinuated about you that fucking pissed me off!" Christian yelled. "He even had the nerve to suggest that you might have purposely tampered with whatever form of birth control we were using to purposely get pregnant!"

"Christian…I….you have to know that I would never…." I mumble trying to defend myself.

"I know you didn't and I know you wouldn't do something like that," he gently kisses me on the cheek. "I was just so fucking shocked that he would fucking suggest that! He even said that I know nothing about you and you could be doing all this just to get to my company."

"Christian…you have to know-" I quickly.

"Shhhhhhhh…." Christian kisses me passionately. "I know you wouldn't try to take my company or my money. I know that you purposely didn't get pregnant. I don't need a fucking paternity test to tell me that baby is mine; I know you haven't been with anyone else."

"Since Taiwan, I haven't been with anyone but you," I swear to Christian, desperate to know that he believes me and that Carrick didn't put any doubt in his head.

"I know you haven't….I know this baby is mine," Christian places his hands on my belly just below my belly button. "I don't need a fucking test to tell me what I already know."

"I'm sorry your dad said those things Christian," I say. "I'm sure he was just trying to look out for your best interest."

"I don't give a fuck what his intention was! He essentially accused you of trying to trap me! Of using me! Of purposely bringing a baby into this world just for money! Why are you fucking pissed?" He asks angrily.

"I'm not pissed, Christian. Hurt? Yes. Scared? Yes. But angry, no," I admit.

"Why are you scared?" he asks quietly.

"I'm scared that even though you say you don't believe him that he might have planted doubt in your mind. I mean I know it's very sudden….we haven't been together for very long, we're living together and now having a baby-" I explain.

"Don't even think for one minute that I believe a word Carrick said!" Christian gently turns me so I'm straddling his legs, looking at him. "We may not have planned this, but I don't think for one minute that you manipulated me or your birth control pills to purposely get pregnant."

"I love you Christian," I put my head against his shoulder, resting my chest against his. "I don't care about your money, about your company or even about this apartment! I love the way you take care of me, how you know what I need even when I don't and I love the relationship we have together."

"I love you too Ana," he hugs me tight against him. "One of the many things I love about you is that when you see me you don't see money. I love how we have explored a new lifestyle together, how you keep my nightmares away and how we both can't sleep without each other. This baby is going to be a new adventure, but an adventure that I wouldn't want to go on with anyone else."

Christian's lips find mine, his tongue dancing with mine as his hands roam my entire body. I know it wasn't Carrick's intention, but the hurt he put in Christian just brought us close together. Right now, it's as if I feel how much Christian loves and cares for me with every kiss, with every touch of his hands, with every movement I can feel his love. I can't remember ever feeling this close to him as I do right now; it's almost as if we both are trying to show each other how much we love the other person by our movements.

"I need you," I nip at his ear as his fingers find my nipple, pinching it gently.

"I'm yours," he whispers.

Christian gently lifts me up, bringing me closer to him so erection is at my sex; he continues to explore my body with his hands letting me take complete control. I slowly lower myself onto him, relishing the connection I feel with him knowing that we are closer now than we have ever been. He holds me against him as I slowly move up and down on him, bringing each of us to the edge.

"I love you so much Ana," he whispers.

"Oh Christian! I LOVE YOU!" I scream as the orgasm takes over my body.

"So good…..God, you feel so good….Don't stop…..ANA!" Christian's hands are firm on my hips, gently but quickly moving me against him as he finds his release deep inside of me.

"I could stay like this all night," I moan a few minutes later.

"Except for the water getting cold," Christian jokes.

"We should probably get out and head to bed. I'm sure it's pretty late," I suggest.

"Ana?" Christian pulls me against him when I try to get up.

"Hmmmm?" I ask.

"Thank you," he whispers.

"You're welcome," I smile against him.

We wash up, dry off and head to bed where we both quickly fall asleep in each other's arms. The next couple of weeks pass by fairly quickly; my pregnancy is still a secret at work and to the general public as Christian and I decided to keep it between us until I was further along. We haven't seen or spoken to Carrick since the night we announced that I was pregnant; Grace has called a couple of times to check in but Christian says Carrick hasn't once tried to reach out to him. I'm hopeful that the two of them will work things out, but I know Christian is going to have a difficult time forgiving Carrick for what he was suggesting. I think the part that surprised me the most was Carrick demanding that Christian insist I get a paternity test done. As if he was implying that I was sleeping around and that there was a chance that the baby was anyone's but Christian's! Regardless of what happened that night, Christian and I have become closer than ever. I don't know if it was what Carrick implied or something else, but that night in the tub Christian and I grew and our relationship became stronger.


	34. Chapter 34

_Author's Note: Thank you all for the positive reviews on the last chapter! I'm thankful for those of you who are still enjoying the story and have chosen to stick with it to see where it is going._

**Chpt. 34 APOV:**

"Are you meeting me at Dr. Greene's office?" I ask as we finish our breakfast; today is my 12 week appointment, we are hoping to hear the baby's heartbeat today.

"Yes, I have a meeting that should end just in time for me to get to the appointment. I promise I won't miss it," he assures me.

"Mr. Grey, Ms. Steele, are you ready to leave?" Taylor asks.

"We're ready," Christian says.

The morning passes by quickly, I'm busy reading through possible manuscripts that have received mixed reviews from my editors while trying to make sense of the financial statement I recently received. As much as I love my job, I truly hate the financial reports that I have to review each month. Thankfully my finance guy has simplified it as much as he can and now he points out areas that are concerning. We have finally finished paying our penalty fee for breaking the lease on the other building so our bottom line is more positive this month than in the previous months. We are still paying a pretty high amount for the office space at Seattle E Books but for right now it's not having a negative impact but in time I think we will move them into the space upstairs that we are renting from GEH. As nervous as I was about moving into this building and the impact of my relationship with Christian, I realize now that I was nervous over nothing. Renting the space here is purely business; other than occasionally having lunch together and texts here and there I have little interaction with Christian during the work day. We both have our separate businesses that we are running and they don't have much overlap with each other especially given how opposite our industries are.

"Ana, we should leave now to get to the appointment on time," Sawyer announces.

"Yes, I'm just about ready," I say as I put several folders and my laptop into my bag.

We arrive a few minutes early for the appointment; however Christian is not there yet. I texted him twice to remind him of the appointment and to see if he was coming but he hasn't responded. When the nurse calls my name I am immediately reminded of the last time I was here, when I didn't think Christian would show up especially after his less than positive reaction to the news. Just as I stand up to meet the nurse the waiting room door flies open Christian rushes to my side.

"Sorry, meeting ran late," he pants.

"I'm just glad you made it," I whisper as we follow the nurse back to the exam room.

"You've gained three pounds," she announces as I step onto the scale.

"Is that good? Shouldn't it be more?" Christian asks.

"Actually that's pretty typical by this point," the nurse reassures him. "Your blood pressure is normal. Dr. Greene will be in shortly."

"Are you going back to the office after this?" I ask as we wait for the doctor.

"No, I have a few things to take care of yet today but I'm going to handle it from the apartment," he answers.

"Same here," I agree.

"I have to fly to Portland next week to meet with a couple department heads about a grant for the university that I've been sponsoring. I'll probably be back late," he says.

"Okay, I have a few meetings but nothing that will run too late," I explain.

"Sawyer will be with you of course, just let him know if you need anything," he replies.

"I'll be fine," I assure him.

"Ms. Steele, Mr. Grey…it's wonderful to see you both again," Dr. Greene says entering the room. "How are you feeling Ana?"

"Less tired, thankfully," I laugh. "The nausea has really let up too."

"That's good," she reads over my chart. "You are right at end of the your first trimester; this is when most women start to feel better. Your energy will probably slowly begin to return and you may find your appetite has returned as well. Are you ready to hear the heartbeat?"

"Yes please," I answer.

Christian comes to my side, holding my hand as Dr. Greene lifts my shirt and places a towel just into the waistband of my pants. She squirts cold gel onto my stomach causing me to shiver before she maneuvers a wand around. I'm not sure what we're supposed to be hearing but right now it just sounds like static and an occasion _swoosh_ in the background.

"Do you hear that?" she asks as we suddenly hear a fast thumping noise.

"What is that?" Christian asks concerned.

"That's your baby's very strong heartbeat Mr. Grey," Dr. Greene smiles.

"That noise? That's a heartbeat?" I ask surprised.

"Yup," she confirms. "Everything is right on track, do you have any questions?"

"No," Christian and I both say at the same time.

"I will see you in about four weeks, be sure to schedule your next appointment on the way out," Dr. Greene says before leaving the room allowing me to clean up before we leave.

"Are you okay? You've been so quiet since we left the doctor's appointment?" I ask as we arrive back to Escala.

"I….hearing the heartbeat….it was….." Christian stutters.

"I know," I smile. "It makes it so real."

"Yeah….I mean I know we saw the baby on the ultrasound but actually hearing a heartbeat…I've never heard anything like that," he admits.

"Me neither, I didn't know what to expect," I agree.

"You really feel okay? You weren't just saying that?" he asks worried.

"Christian, I feel fine," I assure him. "I'm no longer falling asleep right after dinner, I have more energy and my stomach doesn't turn at the mention of food anymore."

"Do you think you….do you want to…." Christian takes a deep breath.

"Do I want to what Christian?" I ask confused.

"Do you think you might want to play tonight?" he asks nervously.

"Oh," I blush realizing what he's asking. We haven't been in the playroom since we told my dad the news. Of course we have been having sex almost daily, but we haven't been to the playroom in weeks. "I'd love to play tonight."

"Meet me upstairs in a few minutes," I tell him after dinner before I quickly take off for the steps.

I can feel my panties damp with excitement before I even unlock the playroom door; the mere thought of being in here again is turning me. I quickly strip out of my clothes, pausing to look in the full length mirror that's by the door. Of course you can't tell that I'm pregnant but I think I can start to see a little bump in my lower stomach. My once flat stomach is definitely not as flat and firm as it used to be; I smile at the realization of why that is. I drop to my knees as I hear Christian's footsteps outside the playroom door. My eyes are fixed to the floor, my legs spread wide apart and my hands relaxed on my thighs.

"Do you remember your safewords?" Christian asks shutting the door behind him.

"Yes sir," I confirm.

"Be sure to use them if you need to, but otherwise I want you quiet tonight," he says.

"Yes sir," I reply.

Christian quickly moves about the room, leaving me on the floor in front of the door while he finds everything he needs. Soft music is played throughout the room, providing a nice relaxing feel as I lose myself in the soft tone, momentarily forgetting where we are. Christian guides me into a standing position before placing a silk blindfold over my eyes, placing me in complete darkness as I feel Christian guide me around the room.

"Hold your arms above your head," Christian commands.

I immediately comply, expecting him to attach my wrists to the overhead grid but to my surprise he doesn't even touch my arms. I feel him wrapping what feels like a silk cloth around my breasts, it never actually touches my nipples but wraps around my actual breasts and my back several times. I can feel the excitement growing with the uncertainty of what he has planned and of what he is doing right now. I'm dying to ask what he has planned but I know better; I trust Christian and when we come in here I give my body to him. I feel Christian tie the binding behind my back before he brings my arms down, holding them against my lower back as he places soft handcuffs around my wrists.

"You have no idea how fucking hot you look right now," Christian says as he takes my nipple into his mouth sucking hard on it.

_Click_

I freeze, unless I'm mistaken that was the sound of a camera.

"Sir?" I ask cautiously.

"Do you need to safeword?" Christian asks concerned.

"No sir…." I pause. "Did you just take a picture of me naked?"

"Yes," he confirms.

"But-" I ask worried.

"I will explain later; you don't need to be concerned about it right now," he says firmly.

"Yes sir, sorry sir," I whisper.

I don't know what I was worried about; Christian is so protective with everything that I know he wouldn't let anyone have access to a naked picture of me. I slowly let out the breath I was holding and gasp as Christian's mouth immediately finds my other nipple. He sucks hard on it while his fingers pinch the other nipple, twisting it ever so slightly. His other hand pushes my thighs apart and immediately finds my sex.

"You're so wet…you like this don't you?" He asks as he takes my nipple between his teeth while pinching the other one.

"Ahhhh Yes sir," I moan.

"Have you missed coming in here?" he asks.

"Yes sir," I answer honestly.

I'm right on the edge as finger gently rubs against my clit, pushing me that much closer to the edge. I'm panting and desperately trying to hold back the orgasm that is finally within reach. Just when I think I can't hold it back much longer, Christian slips a finger into my sex curling it just so he hits that spot deep inside of me.

"Come Ana!" Christian commands and before he even finishes the orgasm takes over; without knowing it I'm grinding myself against his hand trying to get more from him as the need takes over.

I moan when Christian removes his finger from me, but I'm immediately relieved when he steps closer so his erection is against my sex, he moves my hips so he is between my folds and I can feel my juices coat him. The finger that was just inside of me is at my lips, Christian gently pushes it inside of my mouth so I can taste my own release. A few moments later he pulls his finger from my mouth and steps away; I immediately miss his hands on me as his warmth is replaced by cool air. I have no idea what he is doing but it feels like he is away from me for several minutes before I finally feel him return to me. He gently urges me to spread my legs further apart as his fingers once again find my sex. Despite the orgasm moments ago, my body is on edge again desperately wanting more from Christian. I gasp as he inserts something into me; I can immediately tell it's not then ben wa balls but I'm not entirely sure what it is. When the vibrations start I immediately recognize the toy, it's a smaller version of what he used with me when we went to his parent's house one night.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

"Yes sir," I pant.

"I want you to come when you can in here tonight," Christian says. "You don't need to wait for me to tell you to come."

"Yes sir," I reply.

Christian leads me over to the bed, where he positions me bent over his legs as his hands roam up and down my thighs and ass. _Slap_! Christian lightly slaps my ass with his hand, the simple motion causing the item to move around inside of me as it vibrates sending me closer to the edge. _Slap! Slap! Slap! _Christian's hand comes down three more times; although my ass stings, it doesn't hurt but is just enough force to cause the vibrating ball to move around inside of me.

"You're so wet," he says as he runs his fingers through my now drenched folds.

_Slap!_ This time his lands right on my sex and is just what I needed to push me over the edge. I come silently as Christian's hand remains firm on my sex, gently rubbing my clit as the orgasm takes over. The orgasm is somewhat disappointing as it is not nearly as strong as the ones I usually have; I can feel my body is still on edge and desperate for a release. Christian quickly stands me up, unhooks my arms from behind my back and lifts me onto the bed. I feel him climb on the bed next to me, he arranges my body as he deems necessary; I'm lying on my side with my arms in front of me. Christian moves around the bed, and I feel the bed dip next to me as he lays down next to me. I gasp when the vibrations inside of me suddenly increase and I immediately feel a gush of juices between my legs as the excitement builds. Christian's hands gently pull me on top of him, positioning my thighs so I am straddling his face; my hands quickly find his hard erection which is inches from my face in this position.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhh," he moans as I take him into my mouth, bringing him as deep as I can in this position. "That's it baby….don't stop…."

Christian's hands are holding my thighs apart as his mouth quickly finds my sex, his tongue lapping the juices which I can now feel are flowing from me as the excitement quickly builds. I'm having a difficult time focusing on Christian and find myself gagging several times as he thrusts himself deeper into my mouth. As the need builds, I'm moaning around his dick which in turns causes him to moan against me the vibrations of this nearly pushing me over the edge. My undoing is when Christian pulls the vibrating ball from me and replaces it with his tongue.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream as the orgasm hits me harder than the previous two.

Christian is desperately trying to hold my hips still as I try to push against him further, needing something more from him as I ride out my orgasm.

"I need you," he moans as he gently urges me to move down his body.

I expect him to turn me around but instead he urges me to crawl down him, so I'm straddling him while facing his feet. I reach between us, rubbing his erection against my swollen folds before slowly taking him in. I feel myself stretch around him, my sex still throbbing from the multiple orgasms; as I finally take all of him he urges me to sit straight up allowing him to slide even deeper into me.

"You're so tight….so hot and so tight," he moans. "Ride me baby, I want to watch you fuck me."

I blush as his blunt words but at the same time find myself incredibly turned on by the thought of what he must be able to see in this position. His hands leave my hips and I feel him move something around by his head, I blush further at the realization that he likely just propped his head up on a pillow giving him a better view. Christian thrusts himself into me further, silently reminding me of his last request. I lean forward, placing my hands on the bed for support and slowly slide him in and out of me.

"That's so fucking hot….Oh God…..watching your sweet pussy take me like this….don't stop…." He pants.

My face is red hot at his words, but I can't help the arousal that builds knowing that he is so aroused by me right now. Despite the orgasms moments ago, my body is once again on the edge; I can't remember the last time I came so many times in one scene with Christian.

"Can you come again? Please tell me you can come again….I love the way you grip me so tight when you come…." Christian begs.

"I….Yes….so close," I moan, his words once again nearly sending me over the edge.

"Play with your clit while you fuck me," he instructs.

I moan loudly as my fingers find my oversensitive hard bud just above our connection.

"That's it….you're gripping me so tight….fuck you look as hot as you feel right now!" Christian exclaims as I struggle to move against him as the sensations begin to overwhelm me.

"AHHHHHHHHH! CHRISTIAN!" I scream as the orgasm rips through my body and I lose all sense of reality.

Christian's hands immediately find my hips as my hands hold onto the bed for support. He moves my body up and down on him, prolonging my orgasm even further as his own need takes over. My body remains on edge, not being able to fully come down from the orgasm as he continues thrust in and out of me, hitting my g spot every time.

"Oh God! ANA! OH BABY….don't stop….don't!" he screams as I feel him find his release deep inside of me as he continues to move me against him, this time much slower.

After several minutes of trying to catch our breaths, Christian gently lifts me off of him and lays me on my side next to him. He quickly goes to the bathroom and returns with warm washcloth to clean both of us up. He slowly removes the silk binding that was around my chest before removing the blindfold and pulling me close to him.

"That was…." He kisses me deeply.

"Yeah…." I agree, there just are no words to describe that scene.

Christian and I just lay there, I'm not sure for how long but he holds me against for what feels like hours. I must have fallen asleep at some point because the next thing I know our alarm clock is going off and I'm back in our bed. Christian's side of the bed is empty but I can hear the shower water going in the bathroom so I know he hasn't been up that long.

**_The following week: CPOV_**

"I'll probably be gone when you wake in the morning," I remind Ana as we climb into our bed.

"I remember," she smiles. "You and Taylor are flying to Portland, Sawyer will be with me."

"I'll be home late though, as I have to stay for some awards dinner they are having for university benefactors," I complain. "I wish you could join me."

"I know, but my schedule is really busy tomorrow. I have a meeting with the editors at SIP and another meeting over at Seattle E Books, plus several calls," she yawns.

"Let's get to sleep," I turn off the light and wrap my arms around Ana.

If you would have told me when I met Ana almost two years ago in Taiwan that we would be living together, completely in love and expecting a baby I would have told you that you were crazy. I never thought of myself as the settling down type; I never thought I would have a family. Since the day I met Ana, or Rose as I first knew her, I immediately knew that wasn't like anyone I had ever met. Since she moved in with me, my nightmares are almost completely gone, I still have them of course but they are much less frequent and she is able to wake me almost immediately. I sleep so soundly with her that it even surprises me, especially given how little sleep I used to focus on. The BDSM component of our relationship is certainly not what I expected when I first started looking into the lifestyle. Initially I thought our connection was so strong because of BDSM and that was why I felt more connected to her than with any of the other women I had been with. I thought I needed BDSM as a means of control in my life but as our relationship has progressed our time in the playroom has become less frequent. Often a week or two will pass before either of us realizes we haven't been in there awhile. Even when things at work are crazy, sometimes just coming home and having dinner with Ana is enough to ease the tension. We both seem to enjoy our time in the bedroom just as much as we enjoy our time in the playroom.

_Be sure to let Sawyer know if you need anything today –C_

_I will, stop worrying! –A_

_See you tonight –C_

I love our simple text exchanges, it's funny how something so simple can make me smile. It's been almost a month since we told our families about the baby and I still haven't spoken to my dad. He has emailed and called me several times but I just can't seem to face him after what he said about Ana. I was so pissed at him that night, he essentially ruined what should have been a happy night for everyone. My mom has desperately tried to get us to talk but I'm just not ready to hear his excuses; I know he is just going to say that he was trying to protect me or look out for my best interests. To me nothing excuses the fact that he basically insinuated that Ana may have slept around or have altered her birth control to purposely trap me. I get that we haven't known each other for very long, but anyone who meets Ana can tell she is not that type of person.

My day slowly passes by as I spend hours with people doing nothing but kissing my ass because I donated money to the university. I hate attending things like this but my public relations department assures me I need to as it looks good for business. Personally I would rather just write a check and see the reports that they send me quarterly of the work being completed under the grants I fund. Instead here it is, the time I normally would be meeting Ana to head home and I'm stuck in room with uptight people who have had way too much to drink.

"Mr. Grey, we need to leave right now," Taylor quickly approaches me and picks up my laptop bag from the floor next to me before I can even respond. I can tell by the look in his eyes that something is wrong, that something has happened.

"Taylor, what's going on?" I ask as he practically pulls me through the building to the awaiting SUV.

"Someone has Ana," Taylor says as he pushes me into the car.

"WHAT?!" I scream.

"Sawyer dropped Ana off at Escala around four-" Taylor begins.

"No, she was supposed to be working, she had a call scheduled," I interrupt recalling her calendar; a couple of weeks ago we decided to give each other electronic permission to view our work calendars which is helpful when we need to schedule Ana's doctor appointments or something.

"Her call was cancelled, she finished a meeting at Seattle E books and told Sawyer she wanted to work the rest of the day from home," Taylor explains. "When he brought Ana home, Gail informed him that she needed to run to the market to pick up a few things. Ana insisted that Sawyer go with her seeing as she wasn't planning on leaving the apartment. Sawyer tried to refuse but…well you know how insistent Ana can be. We haven't received any threats against either of you and Ana swore that she wouldn't leave the apartment. Gail and Sawyer returned less than thirty minutes later to find the apartment empty."

"We need to get back to Escala Taylor!" I scream.

"I have a pilot meeting us at Charlie Tango to fly us home, we should be there within an hour," Taylor says.

"Have the police been notified? Barney and Welsh? What do the security cameras show?" I demand.

"The security cameras were cut, in fact it appears all power was cut to the apartment moments after Sawyer left. Welsh and Barney are pulling footage from Escala's cameras, hopefully we will get something off of those," Taylor explains.

"Who the fuck has her Taylor?" I scream.

"We don't know yet sir, we will find out," he vows.

"We need to find her," I insist.


	35. Chapter 35

_Author's Note: I loved reading all the guesses on who took Ana or what might have happened to her from the last chapter. Unfortunately this chapter is shorter than normal, but I felt it needed to end where it did in order for the next chapter to flow. My next update probably wont be until at least the middle of next week though so hang in there._

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 35 CPOV:**

"Tell me what we know," I demand walking into Escala.

Sawyer, Gail, Barney, Welsh and a bunch of new security team members that I've never met are all in the security office of Escala when Taylor and I arrive back. The flight seemed to take forever to get back to Escala but I know we made good time when I check my phone as soon as we land. I have been trying to reach Ana on her cell phone since we left but it keeps going to voice mail.

"The power was cut to the apartment at approximately 4:52 this evening, approximately ten minutes after Gail and I left to go to the market. The backup generator kicked in at 4:58 however by that point the apartment was empty," Sawyer explains.

"Are you telling me that it took someone six minutes to get Ana out of the apartment?" I ask surprised.

"Yes sir," Sawyer says.

"How did he get up here?" Taylor asks.

"It appears he took the service elevator," Barney says bringing footage to the screen in front of us. "We can see him here entering the elevator; we assume this is the person however we cannot confirm it since we don't see him getting off the elevator."

"What about when he leaves? How does he leave the building?" I ask.

"We believe this is him….with Ana," Barney answers, bringing a still shot up on the screen.

In the shot, you can barely make out two adults one rather large gentleman and another petite female. The image is somewhat blurry, but the people in the picture have tried to hide their identity quite well. The man is wearing all dark clothes, with a baseball had and hood over his head. He is wearing large sunglasses and has a scarf wrapped around half of his face. His arm is wrapped tightly around the waist of the female next to him who we believe is Ana. It's difficult to know for certainty that it is Ana, but the time stamp on the picture is moments after the backup generator would have kicked on in the apartment. She is dressed in almost matching attire, a large dark colored sweatshirt with a hood and baseball cap covering her face. She is wearing large sunglasses and her hands appear to be bound in front of her. He appears to be holding something against her side, I gulp in fear assuming it's either a knife or a gun.

"Who the fuck is that?" I demand.

"We are running him through facial recognition right now," Welsh explains.

"Is it possible it is Hyde?" I ask knowing it's a stretch.

"We checked sir," Welsh pauses. "He was removed from life support and was declared dead at 10:17 this morning."

"What about Elizabeth? Could she be behind this?" I grasp desperately.

"We don't believe so sir," Welsh says. "As you know she has been under constant surveillance since she was released on bail. We have been monitoring all of her movements, phone calls, emails and visitors; she hasn't left her apartment all day. We confirmed she was in there by having one of our security team members pose as a delivery person for a neighbor. Nothing suspicious appears on her cell phone, house phone, email accounts or bank accounts."

"So we have nothing?" I sigh in realization.

"We will find her sir," Taylor assures me but I can hear the uncertainty in his voice.

"As of right now, nothing is more important than finding Ana. Any project you are currently working on takes a back seat to this. Spare no expense, I don't care who we need to pay off for information or what we need to do you will find Ana!" I scream.

For the next hour, everyone is scrambling over the apartment which has turned into a make shift command center. The local police department arrives to take a statement from me even though they already questioned Sawyer and Gail. They had the nerve to ask me if someone can verify my whereabouts tonight at the time Ana disappeared, as if they were suggesting that I had something to do with it. I nearly punched the officer when he asked that question, if it wasn't for Taylor I would probably be sitting in jail right now. Taylor nearly pushed me out of the room before providing the officer with the information of where we were this evening including the names of several staff members at the university who could vouch for my presence throughout the entire day. As a last ditch effort, we verify with Kate, Elliot, Mia and my parents that none of them have seen or heard from Ana today. Of course this raises red flags and we have no choice but to tell them that we don't know where Ana is at this point. Kate tries to insist she needs to be here but thankfully Elliot is able to convince her that there's nothing she can do from here and that she should stay at home incase Ana tries to reach her there.

"Welsh, I received a text message from a blocked number," I announce as I look at my phone.

"Give me your phone, we can view the message through the computer to insure it doesn't install a virus onto your phone," Barney says.

I reluctantly comply and hand my phone over to Barney; I would much rather just hit the read button on the phone incase this has something to do with Ana but I know that Barney has a point and he is the best at what he does. A couple of minutes later, he has run a virus scan and announces that I can open the message.

I click the button that Barney tells me to as he steps away, clearly not wanting to invade my privacy if this isn't related to Ana. Personally I could care less, there's nothing else that matters right now than finding Ana.

"FUCK!" I scream as I sit back in the chair.

On the screen before me is a distorted picture, but one that clearly shows Ana attached to a large wooden X in some dark room. Her back is to the camera but I can tell it's Ana, there is no mistaken it is her. The bastard has nearly stripped her of her clothing, leaving her only in a bra and panties before he tied her with rope to this cross. When I see what appear to be lashes across her back, I feel so sick with disgust that I literally lose my dinner in the garbage can nearby.

"Sir, there is another message," Barney says.

**_If you ever want to see your girlfriend again, I want 10 million dollars and access to a private jet. I will be in touch with further instructions. Do not involve the police or she will die._**

"Welsh, get the money…call whoever you need to, just get the fucking money," I demand.

"Yes sir," he says picking up the phone no doubt to wake up the president of the bank where we do all of our business at.

I'm passing the room, waiting for the next text message from whomever this is who has Ana. I'm silently begging them to stop hurting Ana and to not hurt our baby. Over the last couple of weeks it finally felt like our lives were settling down; we had become so much closer emotionally since Ana became pregnant than we ever have. We started talking about our plans for a nursery; Ana chose a guest room next to the master bedroom that she likes for the nursery so I have arranged for Elliot to do a little work on the room before we start decorating it for the baby. Our time both in and out of the playroom has been just as amazing as it always is. As I recall our last time in the playroom, I find myself standing in the room remembering that night fondly. I walk over to the chest of drawers and pull out the picture of Ana I took that night; she initially tensed up when she heard the click of the camera but the next day I showed her the picture and explained that the only camera in this room is a polaroid therefore there is no chance of anyone else seeing her naked. The picture shows her breasts beautifully bond with a red silk ribbon, pushing them up just slightly so that with her hands behind her back they are on full display. I walk around the room further, thinking of all the times we have been in here, remembering all the different toys and equipment we have used in the short time we have been together. After a few minutes of wondering around the room, I find myself staring at the cross against far wall in the room. Instantly I see the picture of Ana that this bastard sent me; of her back full of lashes as she is tied to a similar cross god only knows where. I immediately try to pull the cross of the wall but of course I can't, it's bolted on too tightly. I pull all the belts, whips and paddles off the wall, throwing them against the cross forcefully. After seeing that image of Ana, I could never use any of these things on her beautiful body again. Every time I see a belt, I won't be able to shake the image of the lashes from Ana's back.

"Sir?" Taylor quietly enters the playroom, likely alarmed at the loud noise.

"I want this room dismantled as soon as we find Ana," I say firmly.

"Sir?" he asks.

"I want it all gone," I repeat.

"Yes sir," he replies.

"Why hasn't he contacted me again? What does he want?" I fall to the floor as it all becomes too much.

"I don't know sir but I promise you we will find him and we will bring Ana home," he vows.

"What did she ever do to deserve this? Why would someone want to hurt her?" I question.

"She didn't do anything sir. He is a fucking psycho; there is something seriously wrong with him if he thinks he can get away with this," Taylor says.

"You have to find her Taylor," I sob. "I love her….I can't lose her….them. They are my life, please…"

"We will sir," Taylor confirms. "Why don't you try to get some sleep?"

"I can't possibly sleep! What if he calls? What if he texts me? What if she tries to reach out to me?" I question.

"Sir, just lay down for a few minutes. I will keep your phone with me at all times, if he contacts you I will wake you," Taylor says.

"I'll lay down, but I know I won't be able to sleep," I reluctantly agree.

Taylor helps me to my feet before heading downstairs as I head to our bedroom. As soon as I open the door, I smell Ana. Her sweet scent is everywhere in this room, it overwhelms me the moment I walk in. I lay in our bed, the one that we shared less than 24 hours ago and hold her pillow close to me deeply breathing in the scent of her shampoo. I sob into the pillow, completely losing the ability to control my emotions anymore. I can't lose her, she is absolutely everything I have ever wanted even though I had no idea it was what I wanted. I never thought I would be settling down with a woman, that I would be living with someone I love or that I would be expecting a child. I never saw myself as the husband or even father type. However, the last few weeks I have realized that I can't picture my life without her. When we were standing in the guest room last week talking about turning it into a nursery, I could see myself holding a baby in my arms which surprised the hell out of me. Since then, I've been thinking of all the ways our lives will change once the baby gets here, and I'm looking forward to every one of those changes. I could care less what my father thinks, the only thing that matters to me is Ana and the baby.

I must have fallen asleep because when I wake and look at the clock I see that it is nearly three in the morning. I take a fast shower, change my clothes and make my way downstairs to the security office which is still buzzing with activity.

"What's the update?" I ask.

"The facial recognition is still being ran against the footage from the service entrance and parking garages. We don't have any leads on who took Ana yet," Taylor explains.

"Where are Barney and Welsh?" I ask.

"They are in the guest room catching a few hours of sleep," he answers. "Welsh spoke with the owner of the bank, the ten million dollars was securely delivered here about an hour ago. We have it locked in the safe in your office until we have further instructions."

"My phone?" I ask.

"Nothing sir," he says handing it back to me.

"Mr. Grey, here's some coffee and a light sandwich," Gail hands me a plate and cup. "I thought you might be hungry."

"Thank you Gail," I smile sadly. "You should get some sleep too."

"I slept for a couple of hours Mr. Grey, I'm here for whatever you need until Ana is found," Gail says.

"Thank you, I appreciate the both of you and everything you are doing to find Ana," I tell Gail and Taylor.

Hours pass by slowly, I can't stand not being able to do anything. We cannot trace the phone that sent me the message; according to Barney it is an older style cell phone that does not have GPS capability. He says these are often sold as disposable cell phones which cannot be traced to a specific person. Facial recognition has not resulted in any hits; the quality of the photo is too poor. Welsh has sent the video footage to a friend he has who works at the FBI to see if he can clean it up at all so we can get a clue as to who took Ana. We have combed through her email accounts, both person and work, nothing stands out. We called her assistant, Stacy, as soon as the sun rose to see if anything had happened at work the day before but Stacy reported her meetings had gone as expected and that Ana left in good spirits. We found Ana's cell phone, crushed in just next to the service elevator in the parking lot.

_Ding_

My phone alerts me to a new text message, my heart drops imagining what it can be. I know I need to get the phone to Barney so we can screen for any viruses and find out what the sick bastard has sent us now. In the back of my head though I think as long as I don't open the message, nothing has changed. What if something has happened to Ana? What if he has hurt her? What if something happened to the baby? I could care less if the fucker wants more money, I would empty my bank account and liquidate all my assets if it meant getting Ana back safely.

"Barney," I hand him my phone without saying a word.

Barney sees the notification and immediately goes to work. Just like last time, within seconds the message is cleared as to not having a virus and he instructs me to open the message. I take a deep breath before clicking the button on the computer; instead of a still shot this message is a video. I feel the blood drain from my face the moment the video starts playing; I fall into the chair that is thankfully behind me.

_From the video:_

_Ana is literally hanging from the large wooden X that looks like it is propped against a wall. Exhaustion and pain must be taking over, because her body looks completely lifeless. For the first few minutes of the video there is no movement, no sound; I can barely see Ana's back rising and falling as she breaths. She is in the exact position she was from the still shot; her body literally hanging from the rope that binds her wrists to the end of the cross. _

_"Are you ready to submit to me?" Says a deep voice from beyond the camera view._

_"Never!" Ana says strongly despite the obvious exhaustion._

_He positions himself closer to Ana, but still away from the camera, preventing us from identifying him; seconds later a riding crop lands harshly on Ana's back. Her body jolts against the cross, but she doesn't make a sound. I can't see her face from the angle of the camera, but I can only imagine how much pain she is in right now. The cross itself looks like it's made from rough wood; you can see cracks and splinters in the wood even from this distance. The beating continues for some time; I close my eyes not wanting to watch what is happening to her. _

_"Grey…instructions for the money drop off will be sent through a text in the next couple of hours. Come alone – do not notify the police of she dies," the voice says before the video cuts off._

Silence fills the room, once again we are stuck waiting, being forced to play his little game if I have any hope to see Ana again. Gail brings in fresh coffee, juices, an assortment of Danishes and fruit for everyone just as the video has ended. I'm thankful that she didn't see it; it's going to be hard enough for anyone in this room to get the image of Ana's broken, bleeding, tortured body out of their heads.

"It has to be someone who is involved in or at least familiar with the BDSM lifestyle," I announce. "He referred to her submitting to him."

"Okay, that gives us something to start with," Welsh says.

Taylor and Gail are the only ones who knew about my involvement in the lifestyle prior to today; but right now I could care less who knows about the type of sex I have as long as it means I can get to Ana before the fucker hurts her even more than he already has.

"Why wouldn't he just force her to submit?" Barney asks quietly.

"The BDSM lifestyle requires consent of both parties to engage in a scene," I explain. "If she does not consent to be involved in a scene, the dominant cannot force her into one."

"But he can kidnap her," Barney mumbles.

"It must be part of his sick fantasy," I speculate. "He likely believes that if she agrees to submit to him that she will have then chosen him over me. That she would then be his sub."

"So we need to look at people in the area who might be involved in the lifestyle," Welsh says.

"That is going to be easier said than done," Taylor explains. "Any reputable BDSM will not release their member list. Privacy is highly guarded in this lifestyle, as I'm sure you understand-"

"Fuck! I know who it is!" I exclaim as realization hits me.


	36. Chapter 36

_All characters belong to E.L. James._

**Chpt. 36 CPOV:**

"Who?" Welsh and Taylor say together.

"That fucker! The one you threw out of the restaurant that night Taylor," I explain. "He is involved in the lifestyle; both Ana and I saw him at a club just outside of Seattle. He was also at the Coping Together Gala when Ana and I found each other again."

"I have a background check on him," Taylor quickly digs through his desk drawer.

"What do we know about him?" Welsh asks.

"His name is Adam Martin, he is 43 years old, married with two children," Taylor reads. "He is the vice president of operations at a rather large distribution company based in Seattle. His wife does not work. They have approximately ten thousand dollars in the bank account plus various other investment accounts. He has no criminal record, no accusations against him, not even a speeding ticket. Are you sure this is him?"

"The voice sounds like his but it's distorted so I can't be certain," I admit. "He seemed like he was obsessed with Ana though. He approached her initially at a club when she first arrived in Seattle, then at the gala a couple of times before we left, at the restaurant that night where he wouldn't take no for an answer. I would put money on it being him, it just fits….he wants her."

"Sawyer, take two and get to his house now!" Taylor orders. "I don't think she is there, the background from the video doesn't look like a house, but put pressure on his wife. We're looking for abandoned space, perhaps a warehouse or storage building. It has to be someplace with privacy."

"I'm going to pull any real estate the company he is employed by might own, perhaps they have a warehouse they are not using," Welsh announces.

"Mr. Grey, your mother and Ms. Kavanaugh have called several times this morning asking them for an update, what should I tell them?" Gail asks.

"Tell them we are getting close to finding her," I answer with more confidence than I've had since Taylor first told me someone took Ana.

_Ding_

"It's another text," I announce.

Once again, Barney does his thing on the computer and we open the message after insuring it's not going to download some virus onto my phone. Personally I could care less about a virus, but Barney pointed out that a good virus could embed itself into my phone and then be transmitted onto the GEH servers when my phone backs up. We can't risk having a virus effect GEH, business could be shut down for weeks or months plus confidential, protected information could be leaked.

_Midnight tonight – there's an abandoned shopping center just outside of Seattle located at 693 Front Street. Bring the money in a black duffle bag, place it into the empty garbage can in front of the largest store. Come alone._

"He doesn't say anything about Ana," I whisper.

"I don't believe he intends on returning her even if you give him the money sir," Taylor admits.

"We have until midnight then to find Ana and rescue her," Welsh says with confidence.

"Ask for proof that Ana is still okay," Barney suggests.

_Text: I want proof that Ana is alive._

"I sent the text," I sigh.

_Ding_

"He responded…" I give Barney my phone.

"It's another video," Barney says a few minutes later.

_From the video:_

_Ana is still tied to the cross, her back and legs are bloodied with lashes. I can't imagine the amount of pain that Ana must be in right now and how utterly exhausted she must be. _

_"That boyfriend of yours doesn't want to pay to get you back, so it looks like you will be giving me your submission whether you want to or not," a deep male voice once again comes from behind the camera._

_"Never! You can go fuck yourself!" Ana screams in defiance. _

_"He took something from me, it seems fair that I take the thing that matters most from him," the voice yells._

_"He didn't take anything from you! That bastard had it coming!" Ana screams._

_I have no idea what either of them is referring to but obviously he must have said something to Ana about it. Ana's body jerks hard against the wooden cross as a belt comes down on the back of her thighs hard. Like before she doesn't scream or make a sound, obviously not wanting to give him that satisfaction._

_"You both will pay for what you've done!" He screams as he hits her again before the video cuts out._

"Welsh, I want you to dig through everything you can and try to come up with what Martin is talking about. Has GEH ever done business with him or his company? Maybe a past company he worked for?" I ask.

"Already on it sir," Welsh replies.

"Mr. Grey, what should we do about Ana's dad?" Taylor asks.

"I'll go call him, I was hoping to wait until we had more news," I admit.

I go into my office and sit behind my desk taking a deep breath, desperately trying to calm my nerves before I call Ana's dad. He was far from happy with me the last time we spoke, but I know I need to let him know what's going on with his daughter.

Ray: Hello

Christian: Mr. Steele, this is Christian…Christian Grey.

Ray: What's wrong? Has something happened to Annie?

Christian: She has been kidnapped sir.

Ray: WHAT?!

Christian: We just identified the man who we believe has her and we are working to find out where she is right now. I have every member of my security team working to find her sir.

Ray: Is she…

Christian: We know she is alive.

Ray: And the baby?

Christian: We don't believe the baby is hurt but we won't be sure until we get to Ana and have her checked by a doctor.

Ray: Do we know what they want?

Christian: They have demanded 10 million dollars-

Ray: Annie doesn't have that type of money! Maybe a couple years ago, but she just bought the apartment plus the two companies-

Christian: I have the money sir; it was delivered by the bank a few hours ago.

Ray: So what are you waiting for? Go get my Annie!

Christian: the drop off time is midnight tonight.

Ray: What can I do?

Christian: I don't know sir (sigh).

Ray: Get my daughter back Christian. That girl loves you, more than you will ever know.

Christian: I love her too sir. I can't imagine my life without her.

Ray: Call me as soon you find her. Keep her and my grandbaby safe son.

Christian: Yes sir.

That was the hardest phone call I have ever had to make; I can't imagine what Ray must be feeling right now or what he must be thinking. I sit back in my chair and sigh, I don't know what I will do if I lose Ana right now. My life has completely changed since that first trip to Taiwan; I thought I lost her after our time there only to find her a year later at the gala. We've become so much more than we were then, I can't imagine what I would if I lost her again. I need to find her, I need to have her in my life. No matter what, I will get her the best medical treatment and will have the best therapists available to help her get through whatever that sick fucker did to her. I just need to have her back in my life, I can't…

"Mr. Grey?" Taylor interrupts my thoughts.

"What?" I snap.

"We found records of an old farmhouse that was owned by Martin's wife's family. According to the wife, the property has been abandoned for years and that the only thing standing is an old horse barn but even that is in disarray. She thinks an old tractor garage might still be there but she couldn't say for certain as they haven't been to the property in at least ten years," Taylor explains.

"Do you think this is where he is holding her?" I ask.

"It's our best lead right now," Taylor sighs.

"Let's go," I quickly stand up and follow Taylor to the security office.

Taylor and Welsh develop a plan for when we arrive at the property which is at least two hours away. Barney pulls up satellite footage of the area and it appears that there are two buildings on the property. At one time there were obviously additional buildings; all but two buildings have collapsed. Based upon the video footage, we believe it is most likely that if Ana is here she is being held in the tractor garage. Taylor makes several calls and announces that he has arranged for at least a dozen former military personnel to meet us at the location. I have no idea who these people are, but if Taylor trusts them then I will as well. Taylor opens his safe and draws out several handguns before distributing them.

"Mr. Grey, you need to take one," Taylor hands me a gun.

"Taylor, you know how I feel about these things," I remind him.

"Yes I know," he pushes it towards me again. "You need to do this for your own protection and for Ana."

I sigh and ultimately know he is right. After everything that happened at SIP and now with this Martin fucker, I know Taylor is right. Sawyer, Taylor and myself climb into one SUV and head out to the address of the farmhouse. I would have rather take Charlie Tango, but we can't be certain that it hasn't been compromised. There isn't enough time to run checks on it therefore we quickly determined the best way to travel was with the SUVs.

"Sawyer?" I ask about an hour into the trip.

"Yes sir?" he turns to look at me from the front seat.

"How did Ana seem when you dropped her off?" I ask, curious to know what her thoughts were before she was kidnapped. I can't help but wonder if she knew something was going to happen and that is why she insisted Sawyer go with Gail to the market.

"Happy sir," he smiles. "Her meeting had gone very well at Seattle E books as they were preparing to electronically publish a book at the same time that SIP was publishing the same book. Apparently it was going to be the first time that both companies have published the book at the same time. She kept saying that this is what she wanted when she sought to merge the two companies."

"I see," I smile thinking of how happy Ana must have been.

"It had just started raining when we arrived to Escala which is why she insisted I go with Gail to the market. She promised me that she wouldn't leave the apartment for any reason and that she would call me if something came up. I knew we would only be gone a short time as Gail only needed a few items, I didn't think-" Sawyer quickly tenses up.

"None of us thought there was a threat, Sawyer," Taylor reminds him.

"We are approaching the property now, this is where we split up," Taylor announces a short time later.

I look out the window at the overgrown property; I can see what likely once was a dirt driveway in front of us but it's completely overgrown to the point that you can't see what is beyond the driveway. As previously planned, we will approach the property from the side, one car will approach from the front and one from the rear. We don't know how many people might be in the building so we are using extreme caution. We also don't know if this fucker has a gun and where he is in relation to Ana. Everyone assisting with retrieving Ana was provided with a picture of Martin so they know what he looks like. Taylor has instructed that team that our priority is to retrieve Ana; our second priority is to capture and hold this son of bitch until the police arrive. Barney and Welsh have remained at Escala to monitor the situation through a secure channel; they will notify the police and request appropriate medical staff as soon as we confirm that we have Ana.

We drive through a bumpy, overgrown area before Taylor parks the SUV just at the edge of the woods. From this point, we will be on foot – Welsh and Barney confirm we are only a few hundred yards from the building we suspect Ana is in. From the secure channel that all of our team members are using, I know that the other teams have now exited their vehicles and are heading towards the building. Several minutes later we finally find the building; to say that it should be knocked down is an understatement. How it's even still standing is beyond me. There are several holes in the roof; the walls are surprisingly still intact but most of the windows have been shattered. We cautiously approach the building, at this point we don't even know if this is where Ana is but it's the only place that makes sense. Taylor quietly approaches one of the broken windows and looks inside while indicating for Sawyer and I to remain where we are a few feet away. A minute or so later, Taylor quietly approaches us and confirms that Ana is in the building. Sawyer and I let out the breath we were both holding, but then Taylor informs us that she is still tied to the cross and that he didn't see her move. He did not see Martin; we are waiting to hear from the other two teams to see if they have eyes on him. The sun is slowly setting behind the trees; we know darkness will reach us soon and if Martin is not inside the building this could complicate things.

"He is in the far end of the building…it looks like it's a separate room from the victim," A voice comes through the ear piece.

"I want someone covering all exits, when we go in he is either going to run for Ana or run for an exit. If he isn't close to her my money is on exit. I want this fucker, dead or alive he is not to leave this building," Taylor says firmly.

Taylor and I meet the security team in the front of the building while Sawyer meets the other team at the rear. These are the only two exits into the building and with half a dozen people at each exit we do not believe he will escape.

"When the door opens, you three and the entire other security will find Martin. Grey and I will go to the Ana; do whatever you need to do but he is not to get near Ana. Protect her at all costs," Taylor instructs the team.

I take a deep breath as one of the men kicks the door open, Taylor and I immediately rush in and head to the right where Ana's lifeless body is still tied to the cross. Taylor is guarding me and Ana, as I don't pay any attention to what is going on. I am only concerned about Ana, making sure she is okay, making sure the baby is okay and then I will worry about what is going to happen to this fucker.

"Ana, baby, can you hear me," I approach her slowly but she doesn't respond.

She flinches as soon as I touch her; I immediately want to throw up when I see the marks from the multiple beatings I can now see that she received at that fuckers hands.

"No, Please….don't touch me," she whimpers.

"Ana baby it's Christian. I'm going to untie you and get you out of here," I assure her.

She doesn't respond, I'm not sure she is even awake right now. Taylor hands me a knife when I struggle to untie the rope from her wrists. Within a few seconds the rope is cut from her ankles and then her wrists; as soon as she is released her body collapses onto me. I hear gun shots behind me, but I don't pay them any attention. Taylor is behind me with his gun drawn, protecting us as I wrap my coat around Ana's frail body.

"He is down," Sawyer's voice comes over the ear piece.

"Police and EMS are five minutes away," Welsh announces through the ear piece.

"Taylor, go make sure he can't go anywhere. Handcuff him to something if you need to," I instruct.

"Yes sir," Taylor quickly leaves my side.

I pick Ana up and carry her to a nearby corner where I sit with her on the floor. From this position I can see everything, not wanting to take the chance that this piece of shit can get near her again. Until Taylor confirms that he is secured, I'm not taking any chances. I can do nothing but sit here and hold Ana tight against my body, I gently rock her back and forth and whisper to her that I love her. I don't know what else to do right now; I've never felt so helpless in my entire life.

"Mr. Grey," Taylor quietly approaches us. "He is dead."

"Thank you Taylor," I let out the breath I hadn't realized I was holding.

We hear police sirens in the distance, Taylor goes outside to meet the police and will send in the EMS as soon as they arrive. I can't imagine what Ana must have gone through over the last two days; I can only assume she was tied to that cross the entire time. There are clear rope burns on her wrists and ankles from where she was tied; the front of her body has scratches all over it from the wood. Looking at the cross now, I can see it really is just two pieces of wood secured together. The wood is unpolished and rough, splintered in most areas and must have rubbed against her poor body every time she moved. Other than her body flinching every so often, Ana doesn't move or make a sound. I don't know that she even knows she has been rescued at this point.

"Sir, we need to load her onto the gurney so we can get her to a hospital," the EMT says after trying to exam her in my arms.

"I will be riding with her," I say firmly.

"We only allow family-" he says.

"I am her family – I'm her husband," I lie knowing this is the only way I will be able to ride in the ambulance with her and likely the only way I will be able to find anything out at the hospital.

"Okay," he reluctantly agrees.

I lay Ana's lifeless body onto the gurney where the EMT strap her in and take her the ambulance that is just outside the door. Taylor agrees to meet me at the hospital as soon as he is finished with the police; a coroner has been called to take care of Martin's body.

"Do you know if she was given any drugs?" The EMT asks as we ride to the hospital.

"We don't know," I answer.

"Does she have any medical conditions?" he asks.

"She is pregnant," I answer. "About 14 weeks, she is due in the beginning of April."

"Any allergies?" he asks.

"No," I answer. "Is she okay?"

"Her blood pressure is low; I've started an IV as she is clearly dehydrated. I'm guessing that she hasn't eaten or had any fluids in quite some time," he explains. "The hospital will need to evaluate for any internal injuries."

"Can you tell anything about the baby?" I ask cautiously.

"I think we have a doppler here somewhere," he says looking through the cabinets. "Here it is. I can try to find the heartbeat but I need to warn you that considering how early she is I might not be able to find it. It doesn't mean there is something wrong with the baby, so don't panic."

"Okay," I take a deep breath.

"That is her heartbeat, you can tell because it's slow," he says moving the little wand around Ana's belly near her panties. "And there's the baby's heartbeat, nice and strong,"

"Thank god!" I exclaim; I don't know what I would have done if Ana lost the baby.

I text Taylor asking him to notify everyone as soon as possible that Ana has been rescued and we are on our way to the hospital. I confirm that right now we don't know the extent of her injuries as she is unconscious but that the baby has a strong heartbeat. A short time later we arrive at the hospital and I follow the EMTs and the gurney into the emergency room where we are met by a team of doctors. I'm relieved to hear that Welsh called ahead to alert them that we were coming and provide them with what we know occurred over the last two days. There is much we don't know but right now, we know she was beaten several times and likely denied any food or liquids.

"Mr. Grey, we need to examine her. Can you please wait outside?" a nurse asks.

"I'd prefer to be here," I answer.

"I know sir, you saved her now let the doctor's check over her. We need you to complete some paperwork on your wife so we can enter her into our system," she says handing me a stack of papers on a clipboard. "You can stay right here outside the door."

I reluctantly do as I'm told, knowing that I will likely lose this argument as I sit down in the chair just outside the room where Ana is. I fill out the paperwork quickly and return it to the nurse's desk as I pace back and forth waiting for someone to tell me something about Ana.

"How is she?" Taylor and Sawyer rush towards me.

"They're examining her now," I sigh.

"Mr. Steele will be arriving first thing in the morning," Taylor says. "Your mom is on her way-"

"She doesn't need to come," I interrupt.

"I tried telling her that but she was very insistent that she needed to be here," Taylor sighs.

"Mr. Grey?" A doctor comes out of the room some time later.

"Yes? How is she?" I ask quickly.

"She is severely dehydrated and has a mild concussion," the doctor explains. "We had to stitch up some of the lashes on her back and we've applied antibacterial lotion to the others. We removed several splinters from her body and gave her a tetanus shot."

"And the baby?" I ask.

"By some miracle, the baby appears to be perfectly healthy," he smiles. "The heartbeat is strong and she is showing no signs of contractions. We have hooked her up to a fetal monitor for observation."

"Is she awake?" I ask.

"Not yet, I expect her to be out of it for awhile," he answers. "From what I can tell she has been through a lot."

"Can you tell…did he…." I can't even say the words; I'm disgusted at the thought of his hands on my Ana.

"We performed a rape exam and there were no signs of sexual trauma or recent intercourse," he confirms.

"Thank God," I sigh.

"You can go in if you would like," he says.

"Thank you Doctor," I reply and immediately head to Ana's room.

Opening the door, I immediately see Ana who looks as if she is sleeping peacefully in the bed. She is hooked up to all sorts of monitors; I see straps around her stomach which must be the fetal monitor. I can tell other monitors are checking her heart rate and blood pressure. She has an IV that is giving her fluids; I cringe seeing her wrists covered in bandages from the rope burns that she received from that bastard. I pull a chair up next to her bed and just sit there holding her hand; I try talking to her but I really don't know what to say. I end up telling her over and over again that she is safe, that the baby is healthy and that we got the fucker who did this to her.

"Christian?" My mom quietly opens the door waking me.

I step outside with my mom and fill her in on everything that happened. I leave out the part about the BDSM tie to what happened and play this off like a stalker who wanted her. I know there's more to the story and my mom suspects that I'm holding something back; however we won't know more until Ana wakes up. Even when she wakes up I don't know if she will remember everything that he said to her; I have Welsh and Barney still digging to find some link between me and this fucker.

"When will she wake up Mom? Why won't she wake up?" I sob, hugging my mom tightly for the first time in my entire life.

"Christian," she says gently holding me closer to her. "Her body has been through hell, she needs some time to recover. It doesn't sound like she likely slept at all, combined with not having food or fluids her body is probably exhausted. Not to mention the obvious physical and emotional trauma."

"Will you talk to her doctor? I want her and the baby to get the absolute best treatment; I don't care the cost I will pay anything," I insist.

"Of course Christian, I will speak to him as soon as I can," she assures me.

"Oh, and I sort of told them Ana and I were married," I smile.

"What?!" she asks shocked.

"Calm down, we didn't get married," I laugh. "It was the only way they would let me ride with her in the ambulance and I knew that once we arrived here they wouldn't tell me anything if I wasn't family. Her dad isn't arriving for a few more hours; there is no way I could have waited that long to find out how her and baby were doing."

"I understand Christian," she says.

"Thank you Mom," I say before heading back into Ana's room to sit by her side again.


End file.
